7chan
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
| |
| Foundation | December 2005 |
| Major Boards | /b/, /34/, |
| Epileptic Wins | /b/day, kicking furfags out, Epilepsy Foundation, first /i/ board evvar. |
| Website | 7chan.org |
[edit] Prelude
[edit] Penesis, Chapter 1
In the beginning there was Moot.
On the first day Moot created 4chan and said 'Lord, this is 4chan, bringer of pain'.
On the second day, Moot created Anonymous, they became lonely so Moot created Bridget, Anonymous complained of this trap, but Moot proclaimed 'there are no girls on the interbutt, Bridget will suffice'.
On the third day, Moot gave man tripcode, 'behold tripcode' he said, only ye who wish to forgive may perform.
On the fourth day, Moot created /b/, and many Anonymous rejoiced.
On the fifth day, the server crashed, Moots creation was in disarray, MYSQL errors killed off many Anonymous with no mercy.
On the sixth day, there was a sticky, and many complained of this sticky, and thus proclaimed 'this sticky sux0rz'.
On the seventh day, Moot created faggot laws, and anonymous knew what must be done.
[edit] Fagsodus, Chapter 9
Anonymous toiled under Moot's harsh rule for at least 100 years, building great pyramids unto him on many hectares of land.
Anonymous cried out "When shall we be freed of this tyrant king, who so punishes us for our beliefs?"
The Internet spoke unto Anonymous: "There shall be a baby born amongst you, a child prophet, and he shall be called Ian, and he shall lead you from this place. There will be some other guys too, but they will turn out to be faggots."
Upon his 17th year, the prophet Ian came before Moot and brought plagues of DDoSing and rebellion on his head.
Ian parted the Internet, and led his people to freedom. Forty days and forty nights they traveled through the desert.
Finally, on the last day, Ian dropped his GBC and proclaimed "This, my followers, is our new land. It shall be called 7chan."
And lol, the Internet saw that it was good.
[edit] The Revelations of Tanukihat the Apostle, Chapter 13
A vision was brought to me by the Angel of Death, bearing the number 444, the Mark of the Beast.
I saw great gouts of flame, the earth was rent in two, the people tore at their clothes.
I heard the lamentation of womens, and a great wailing sent up from all I could see.
The Angel showed me the ruination brought upon our world. I saw downtimes last many weeks. I saw noobs crawling over every surface as maggots.
I saw great piles of money, but when I touched them they dissolved, became as dust.
I saw then a great horse, bearing a rider in a black cloak across the landscape. It was Mockskin, Rider of the Apocalypse, and he brought destruction.
I saw Moot, the Lord of the Flies, striding across the world. His minions did battle with those of 7chan, a holy war to last for centuries.
I asked the Angel, "What is this place?"
The Angel stood before me, and he spoke: "Look, look at what I have shown you. It is the final days, it is the End of Times."
[edit] A Little History
7chan was created on September 25th, 2005 by symbion and the mysterious zeneslev, for the lulz. The site used to be funded by zeneslev's brother Renzo, but that luxury back again bitches. 7chan is currently NOT owned by p4ch3c0 but owned by Moot. It's main server is in FDC's datacenter. It did not gain a substantial userbase until the events of /b/-day, where it was advertised on /b/ through the underlying chaos. 7chan now has a significant user base, and is slowly gaining more.
As of January 25, 2007, the much touted /i/nvasion board was taken down due to a violation of the datacenter's TOS.
7chan is one of the first and the largest boards to use trevorchan software.
Ironically, despite flourishing as a result of the oppression that preceded /b/-day, moderation and enforcement of rules is actually comparable to that of 4chan. Moderators are extremely responsive, especially upon receiving a topic/post report, as people who create topics/posts that violate the rules (such as those who post jailbait or CP) will be met with incredibly swift banhammer strikes, and have their topics/posts deleted. However, most /b/tards consider these mods to be friendly because of their lack of mental deficiencies (unlike 4chan's moot), tolerance towards lolicon and their intolerance towards furry porn. HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS.
When 4chan closed temporarily on July 2008, the 7chan admins made the site inaccessible to all users for several weeks to stave off the cancer. When it reopened, most /b/-day veterans were forced leave out of sheer anger, due to the fact that the furry board had been restored and that 90% of the other boards, including /b/, had been deleted by the mods. At this point, even the stupidest users have realized that this was a painfully obvious example of trolling by abusive mods/admins, and that 7chan has fallen victim to a case of massive modfaggotry. Most users now agree that OmgWtfIDiedLol and p4ch3c0 have caught the cancer themselves and that they have disgraced themselves to the point where their faggotry is now on the same level as moot and W.T. Snacks. All /b/-day veterans and refugees who used the site as an alternative to 4chan now refer to the newly reborn 7chan as NIGGERTITS MK. 2.
Because of this modfaggotry, some users have even went as far as to claim that moot actually did take over 7chan on December 2007 and that the independence declared during Soviet Sunday was nothing more than a ruse.
Currently, most 7chan migrants spend their time in Not7chan, a 7chan replacement that possesses all the boards of the original, without any of the furries or faggotry.
[edit] Boards- tl;dr
7chan contains 34 boards (probably plus some hidden ones), at last count. Some of them are inspired by their 4chan equivalent, while some of them are unique to 7chan. The 7chan admins split the boards into 3 categories.
[edit] VIP
The VIP section contains 7chan's most prized, and most relevant boards to /b/tards. This includes:
- /b/- 7chan's random, the new home of many /b/tards of 4chan. Now currently the largest /b/ board in the intertubes next to that of 4chan. Some argue that it is superior to 4/b/, meaning it has a much more substantial amount of lolicon, shotacon, if that can be physically possible. Also, any new topics created will not be immediately be buried by OVER 9000 other new topics. God bless the internets!
Furry content is now a bannable offense.LIES
[edit] General Boards
- /a/- Weeaboo, the board dedicated to animu.
- /ani/- For all other animal related topics.
- /cat/- Caturday, everyday.
- /cf/-
Faggots who think they can cook.NOT ANYMORE. Now it's for "Cute Females". See for yourselves. - /co/ - Comics. Like manga, but with smaller eyes and less speedlines.
- /fit/-
A board unique to 7chanLOL STOLEN BY MOOT. It contains fatasses and weeaboos who think DDR and masturbation are the world's best workouts. - /fl/- Flash reposts of reposts. Worth keeping an eye on as good hentai pops up occasionally. Usually broken in some way or another.
- /g/- Technical discussion. The fags even stole the fucking name of the board from 4chan. Stockholm syndrome, anyone?
- /gif/- Again, shit loads of reposts. But this time, they're animated!!
- /halp/- It's like 4chan's /g/, only not filled with trolls. Anonymous will actually deliver halp on occasion, and trolling earns bans.
- /lit/- Literature.
- /me/- Media, instead of having a good music board, or a good tv board, there is one shit media board.
- /pr/- Programming in various languages. Script kiddies are ejected summarily.
- /r/- Formerly the /r/equest board.
Removed, because Anonymous failed to deliver.Un-removed, thanks to over 9000 requests. - /svg/- Vectors.
- /vg/- Video Games. Flamewars run rampant, enter at your own risk.
- /wp/- Wallpapers, it's like a wallscroll for your computer!
- /x/- Paranormal, the best general board.
- /zom/-Zombies, redundant.
[edit] Definitely NSFW
Recently, the owner of 7chan decided to grow a pair of balls, and has banned all furry content from the site. There is a "Don't ask, don't tell"-policy for furfags with (mostly) bullshit bans going on right now. 7CHAN IS NOT ANYMORE THAT WHAT IT ONCE WAS
- /d/- Alternative hentai. /d/iapers, bon/d/age, etc.
- /elit/- Erotic Literature, mostly copypasta.
/fur/- ding, dong, the wicked witch is dead- /h/- Called hentai, but it's more like generic toon porn.
- /men/- Even though named "Sexy Beautiful Men", the only things posted here are "rate my cock/face" or gay advice threads. Frequented by fags and people like Madeira.
- /n/- Nekonomimi and Kemonomimi. Catgirls, bunnygirls, etc.
- /nb/- Catboys. The same shit as above, but without tits and with dicks.
- /pco/- NSFW comics.
- /s/- Sexy, beautiful women. Finally, a porn board on 7chan that doesn't fail.
- /u/- Yuri. NOT THE COSMONAUT, GOD DAMMIT.
- /unf/- Uniforms. *unf* *unf* *unf*
- /y/- Yaoi. As if 7chan didn't already have enough totally gay shit, anime manporn.
[edit] Boards that have died due to epileptic faggotry
- /34/- A board that was once dedicated to raep your childhood memories. Now passed away.
- /i/- Invasion. Dead for eternities by now. Was also the best board that 7chan ever had.
- /bbs/- A text board. A motherfucking textboard. A decrepit relict from the 90's. The only faggots who went there are more than likely believed to still run ancient shit like Lynx.
- /dino/- A board about dinosaurs. Ironically enough, it has met the same fate as it's IRL counterpart.
- /dog/- A lame board that was about -you guessed it- dogs. Thank god that the heap of shit died. Next target: /cat/.
- /durp/&/raeg/- The two pieces of shit that where created when p4ch3c0 tried to kill /b/. The failure was so immense that it could be heard around the internet when Anon looked upon these miserable boards.
- /fail- Sailchan, a parody of 4chan.
- /oe/- Oekaki. Dead due to unclear reasons.
- /pho/- Photography. One of the few nice boards on 7chan that sadly succumbed to the spic's SAGERAEG.
- /pro/- Projects. Anon tried to accomplish shit, but failed over and over again.
- /st/- Stencils.
- /t/- Torrents. Removed due to fail.
- /tech/- Not dead, but under another name, /g/. The old /g/ is dead, anyways.
- /vid/- Jewtube links galore. Now removed, because Jewtube can be embedded in /b/.
- /vroom/- A shit board about cars that died.
- /w/- The local weapons board.
- /cake/- No moar delicious cake. In the middle of being v&rolled with a threat to the president it occurred to p4ch3c0, for the first time, that the feds don't like pedophiles. That scared him so much he hasn't come out from under his bed since.
- /cp/- A fake ass "CP"-board that never ever even contained actual CP. Rot in hell bitch.
- /di/- Dickgirls. The Pope has fucked them up but good nigga.
- /fn/- Futanari.
- /gu/- Guro :3
- /porns/- WHAT COULD THAT HAVE BEEN, GEEZ.
- /sm/- Gay shotacon. The Pope took care of the board, and Shotacat was put on Prozac afterwards. We feel your pain.
- /ss/- Straight shotacon. Little boys, without the gayness.
- /0/- All about H.
- /nig/- Muhfuggen bix nood shoop da woop.
- /test/- A relict from 7chan's early days. Was made for testing shit.
[edit] Dead, external drug boards
(Once hosted on 711chan) On November 7, 2007 the drug board was downed by the admins after the Drug Enforcement Agency threatened rape. The admins got scared and posted on how over 9000 cocks would penetrate their virgin assholes if they didn't do it. They also let everyone know that THIS IS AN ANIMATION.
- /joey/- The Joey T. fanclub.
- /weed/- Marijuana, Hashish, you name it you get it.
- /drug/- Drugs in general.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY DEAD BOARDS, YOU ASK? ASK THE SPIC ABOUT IT!
[edit] SEKRIT BOARDS
- /lorf/- YIFF IN HELL FURFAGS
Baleeted!
DISREGARD THAT. THE FURFAG BOARD IS UP AGAIN. I REPEAT, IT IS UP AGAIN
You know what to do.
The other sekrit boards are as dead as a rock. In addition, there where a couple of sekrit boards that were so secret that not even oldfags knew about them. For a small mother fucking elite. Anyways, they are gone with the wind. But don't give up, young adventurer, you may find some of the deepest secrets in the depths of the spic ghetto that is known as 7chan.
[edit] 7chan, A History
[edit] Mod Drama Sunday
[edit] Password Leak
On 16:49:08, a post on 4chan with the mod passwords on them appeared. A user posing as a mod gleaned the mod passwords from Symbion in the IRC channel. Hysteria ensued, shit was deleted, and there were about ten stickies. Passwords were soon changed and and crisis was averted. Nonetheless, this caused major lulz and drama.
10-30-06 - NEVAR FORGET
[edit] 7chan and 4chan
7chan and 4chan are in constant rivalry due to the events of /b/-day, where many 4channers separated from the herd to make their new home at 7chan. As such, 7chan maintains that they are better than 4chan because their community is smaller and contains less gaiafags, newfags, and other undesirables, and because their /b/ has NO RULES, LOL. 4chan, on the other hand, maintains that 7chan is inferior because 4chan's is the original /b/, because 7chan is unstable and experiences downtime. Although no one on 7chan ever goes to 4chan, they are always the first and best source when it comes to 4chan's downtime. The deep-seated nature of this rivalry causes minor outbreaks of interchan conflict occasionally, though usually such occurrences are minor, such as a couple of 4channers posting furry on 7chan's /b/ in order to piss them off. The lingering distrust and anger between these two factions is unlikely to ever cease.
[edit] Mod Drama 2: Electric Boogaloo
- "As many of you know, a certain "raid" that was started here has gained lots of attention over the past few weeks. This "raid", targeted at Hal Turner of Hal Turner Radio, was actually a plan that was devised by Buri-chan, former 7chan admin, and Hal Turner himself. The details of the plan are that 7chan offered Hal Turner notoriety with the *chan communities [as most of them are filled with white supremacists anyway], and, unknown to us, donations, in exchange for an extra server to ease the pressure on our current, overtaxed servers.
- As the community is open to pretty much any type of discussion, we couldn't exactly stop this so-called raid from happening, so we decided to play along. Couldn't hurt, right?
- What we didn't count on was the few "out of the loop" raiders attacking other sites, such as Bill White's [aka overthrow.com owner]. Apparently, Bill White took offense and ordered his own fans [ps3 hueg numbers] to take down our site, which, as you know, has happened.
- Apologies to all parties unintentionally harmed by this mixup. We are no longer in this with Hal [since, apparently, this is a scam on his part, since he received over $1,000 in donations].
- - Matt"
The clever folks at 7chan managed to take away the last of Hal Turner's fanbase/donators, and make a new meme. I also learned what gullible means.
Reactions to this statement seem to fall into several categories:
- "Meh. We did it for the lulz, and we got them. Declare victory!"
- "The mods are just kidding! IT'S ALL AN ILLUSION! BLACK IS WHITE! POOL IS OPEN!"
- "I'm shocked, SHOCKED that 7chan wasn't honest and forthright! I'm going back to 4ailchan, where the mods never act badly."
- "Where's mah check?" (i.e. "Let's make a meme out of it!")
Hal Turner says:
- "Bill White is once again simply making things up. He has quite a track record of doing exactly that.
- There isn't one iota of truth to what Bill has written in his claiming the DDoS was setup in any way by me.
- I do not know anyone at any of the web sites that perpetrated this series of attacks. I did not talk to anyone about doing the attacks.
- Bill White simply doesn't know what the hell he is talking about. He is a has- been who is trying to weasel some publicity for himself and his pathetic web site out of the issue involving me.
- Hal Turner"
[edit] 7chan's Numerous Deaths and Rebirths
The entire point of 7chan and the reason that so many /b/tards flocked to it and stayed there after /b/day, is that, unlike 4chan, 7chan strictly maintains that the only rules they will allow their board to be effected by are: no CP, no Furry ContentYou must be so fucking naive to believe that., and no board-wide flooding (flooding kept in one thread on /b/ is AWWWRIGHT). Due to this and other reasons, such as DDoS attacks, bandwidth and money issues, and sheer faggotry, 7chan tends to go down for a while and then return. Loyal 7channers know the score and always wait it out, but other /b/tards see this as a failure. Comparisons between 7chan and a phoenix will result in accusations of furriness.
[edit] The Chat
NotableLulz: how did all this drama start?
p4ch3c0: one of our mods posted the mod rules
p4ch3c0: they state that we ONLY ban for CP and floods
p4ch3c0: then people bitched and said "we should ban furfags too"
p4ch3c0: so we did
p4ch3c0: and not even an hour into it, /b/ was filled with threads about BAWWWWW
WE ARE NO BETTER THAN 4CHAN
NotableLulz: so the furfags flooded /b/?
p4ch3c0: so we did what you guys asked AGAIN
p4ch3c0: yes, a little
p4ch3c0: it was all two guys
p4ch3c0: that's not the point though
p4ch3c0: everybody is getting mad for something they brought onto themselves
p4ch3c0: you wanted us to ban furfags, so we banned furfags
p4ch3c0: you guys complained about it, so we stopped
p4ch3c0: I don't understand what the hell you expect me to do
p4ch3c0: but yeah
p4ch3c0: everybody appears to be angry at us for this
NotableLulz: so the PN got pissed and split to a new server?
p4ch3c0: why'd they get pissed?
NotableLulz: you've read the copy pasta right?
p4ch3c0: yes
p4ch3c0: whoever wrote that is misinformed
NotableLulz: I guess they blame you for allowing the furfaggotry or something
p4ch3c0: heh
p4ch3c0: I guess they missed what happened after we started banning them
p4ch3c0: but please, answer me this
p4ch3c0: is illustrated animal porn really that fucking bad?
p4ch3c0: I mean
p4ch3c0: we see dead babies, mutilated cocks, and people covered in shit
p4ch3c0: every single day
p4ch3c0: but for some reason, mere drawings upset people so much
NotableLulz: hahaha, from the standpoint of a non-anonymous, it's not nearly as bad... but...
p4ch3c0: Anonymous has lost his balls
NotableLulz: as anonymous I more dislike the furfags themselves not their faggy
art, it's just icing on the cake
p4ch3c0: the furfags thrive on your hatred
p4ch3c0: they want you to hate them so that they can post more of it to piss you guys off
NotableLulz: I usually don't pay them much attention, sage, etc.
NotableLulz: I grief SL for lulz
p4ch3c0: and since it seems that I would most likely get kickbanned from your new channel
p4ch3c0: would you mind relaying this conversation to them?
NotableLulz: yeah no prob
[edit] Sonic community takes a trip to bantown
The pigs have simultaneously shut down Sonic CulT, S2Beta, and 7chan, reportedly for child porn on the /b/ section of the site. Obviously a republican KKK conspiracy. The coppers have reportedly hired Mike Sandy, the renowned haxxxxor from the village of democrats.
Also apparently the entire CultNet, which hosts the aforementioned sites, is down. Fucking pwned guys.
For extra lulz, it should be noted that everything started with a failed attempt of trolling made by two 7chan /b/tards against a 13-year old girl. The latter, then, told her dad, who immediately contacted the Party Van. What was a trivial case of trolling became an example of EPIC FAIL and pwnage at the hands of an emo bitch.
Dear Anonymous,
The massive shutdown of 7chan and the subsequent sites hosted by 7chan’s server provider has shocked many of us. However, it has shocked me and a few of my constituents even more.
The reason being is that, through a somewhat innocent prank, we believe that we are the ones responsible for starting the events that led to the eventual shutdown of 7chan, Sonic CuLT, and S2Beta.
How did we do it?
It all started back two weeks ago when me and my friends, also /b/tards, decided to incite serious lulz by posting a picture of a spoiled little emo that goes by the name of Elizabeth Snyder, who lives in Tulsa, Oklahoma, along with her phone number on the thread “Giant Black Cock”. Originally, we were convinced that the thread would disappear into oblivion the next day, but to our surprise, we see a MySpace bulletin demanding who was the one who posted her number and picture on the internet. We all lol’d at this and told fellow /b/tards about this. The contributions to the thread were the source of epic lulz for our social group.
About a week later, she had told us that she was fed up with all the weird phone calls and was threatening legal action. Furthermore, some caller told her that the post was made on 7chan. We didn’t think of her threat to be anything serious, for she was just a spoiled and dumb little brat who deserves to be raped. As a precaution, we informed the rest of the social group to stop posting on the thread so it would fade away out of our collective memory.
This very morning, I received word that she did, in fact, call the authorities. Fearing legal repercussion, we immediately head for the 7chan board to find a way to get rid of the thread. Originally we planned to raid the /jb/ thread to get it off but we found out that 7chan was raided by someone else; the FBI.
Convinced that it may have been the cause of some CP in /b/ (as stated in ED), we call her to tell her there is no reason to continue her witch hunt. The transcription of that phone call, based on anecdotal accounts, was as follows:
Anonymous: Hello
Emo bitch: Hi!
Anonymous: I’ve got good news for you.
Emo bitch: What?
Anonymous: 7chan was shut down.
Emo bitch: I know.
Anonymous: lolwut?
Emo bitch: Yeah, my dad was pissed so he called the FBI.
Anonymous: No wai!!!!!
So now, we are here at this point. Personally, me and the rest of the cohorts responsible for the creation and the propagation of the thread that killed 7chan, Sonic CuLT, and S2Beta are in a state of shock. It wasn’t a giant raid that killed 7chan, nor was it drama on part of the mods or any of that.
7chan didn’t end with a bang, but with 2 idiots from Oklahoma who thought posting a picture and phone number and watching the results would be funny.
With that in mind, I really don’t know what to say other than “I’m sorry.” Let this all be a lesson to all of us that it’s all fun and lulz until someone gets a visit from the party van.
Sincerely, Anonymous.
[edit] 7chan lives once more
After much deliberation, a new server was purchased. p4ch3c0 is now in charge with a new moderation team, including janitors for the first time, so shit actually gets done.
[edit] 7chan Denies 4chan refugees
In a move similar to United States ignoring Nazi persecution until after everyone was dead, 7chan has flatly denied any asylum for anyone from 4chan. This will no doubt lead to the deaths of countless millions who are now at the mercy of Moot's hunger for rent money.
[edit] moot Drama
On December 7th, 2007, Moot implemented his Web 2.0 front page for 4chan, and purchased the rights to 7chan from p4ch3c0 for an undisclosed number of tacos. The redirect was implemented shortly thereafter. In preparation for the merger with 4chan, massive PARTY HARD measures were implemented on /b/ to discourage people from reading the board, and to go to 4chan instead. At the moment, the Web 2.0 design for 7chan is being prepared and will be available shortly. In the meantime, the admins have removed all rules on /b/ to encourage the exodus. Once the merger and redesign is complete, the boards will be pruned, Javascript/Flash ads will be put in place to ensure the flow of jew golds, and the Chans will be united. lie.
[edit] The Future?
The formal transfer of ownership is scheduled for December 23rd, 2007. Obviously, to complete the merger, some rules will need to be applied, and some boards will be removed or modified. The following rules are still works in progress, but the core ideas will remain:
- We will take a much stricter stance on Child Pornography. This means that any picture, drawn or photographic, which is even remotely close to underage, will earn the user a permanent ban.
- The new *chan site will be primarily supported through the use of interstitial advertisements. Users attempting to bypass these advertisements will earn a permanent ban.
- The new *chan site will be designed to appeal to a broad and diverse user base. This means that people of all genders, nationalities, sexual orientations, and sexual preferences will be welcome. Intolerance of these lifestyles will result in a permanent ban.
- In accordance with the previous rule, users who have formerly been discouraged from frequenting 7chan will be embraced with open arms. Furries, Gaia Online users, and new Internet users will all be welcome, and each will have boards dedicated to their individual preferences.
- Also in accordance with the new rules, Moot has filtered the term "newfag" so when typed and submitted it appears as "silly sausage" to prevent offense being caused to new Internet users.
[edit] A Chat With Moot
Begin: DCC Chat with Mootles (hottie@desu.desu.desu)
*** Mootles is hottie@desu.desu.desu
*** Mootles is «Stoplight Girl»
*** Mootles on harbl.7chan.org
*** Mootles is using a registered nickname
*** Mootles on ~#7chan, +#idlerpg
*** Mootles idle 21 min 53 s, signed on «Sat 8th Dec 2007 01:20p»
<NeppyMan> Thanks for taking a few minutes to talk to me about this. I know there's been a lot
of confusion about the *chan merger.
<Mootles> Happy to. So what do you want to know?
<NeppyMan> Well, first of all, there's a lot of speculation that this is some big prank, or
faked, or somehow not true.
<Mootles> No, this is no joke. I took what ad revenue I could scrape together and purchased
the rights to 7chan from p4ch3c0. It used up most of my money, which is why we're
going have to be strict about the no ad-blocking software.
<NeppyMan> I can understand that. So you're working on merging the websites, then?
<Mootles> Absolutely. We're using the Web 2.0 design that I put up on 4chan's main page as
a base, and going from there. I've contracted with a few AJAX designers to help make
the new site extra-interactive. We'll be eventually removing frames and page
submissions altogether, and have it all replaced by Javascript calls.
<NeppyMan> Sounds bandwidth-intensive. So what about the overseas hosts?
<Mootles> Well, that gets into why we're having to change some of the rules. Our main server
is hosted in the US, unlike 7chan's, which is in Germany. We have to be very
careful about staying on the legal side of things now that we're going to be
implementing premium accounts.
<NeppyMan> That's right, that does subject you to ISP statutes, doesn't it?
<Mootles> Absolutely. Which is why we're having to be more careful. Because we'll be taking
subscription money and personal login information, we're partially responsible for
content.
<NeppyMan> Good catch there. So what are the premium accounts going to be like?
<Mootles> There's going to be four levels. Silver, Gold, Diamond, and Platinum. Silver accounts
get higher bandwidth priority. Gold accounts get access to certain VIP boards, as do
Diamond users. Platinum accounts are generally reserved for admins, since they get to
view deleted threads, posts, and images, although we may open them up for purchase in
the future.
<NeppyMan> So what kind of money are people going to be spending for these accounts?
<Mootles> We're going to keep it very reasonable. Silver accounts are $2.99 a month, Gold is
$4.99. Diamond is $9.99. Platinum, if we were selling it, would be $19.99 a month.
<NeppyMan> Not bad. So what about plans for the future?
<Mootles> Well, like I've said, some of the boards are going to have to be toned down. Due to US
laws, we're going to have to be really careful with /cake/ and similar boards. I've
been talking to a representative from Sealand to see about purchasing hosting there,
but it's not cheap, so it'll have to wait until we get ad revenue.
<NeppyMan> Sealand? Isn't that that off-shore oil derrick island nation?
<Mootles> Exactly. That will let us get around some of the laws. Some of the 7chan staff,
especially EtnaIsMyWife, insisted that we at least make an effort to keep /cake/ up for
now, so I think we're going to use 7chan's Germany server to do it for he time being.
<NeppyMan> Sounds like a plan. So what about the new rules on flaming and insulting?
<Mootles> Well, again, that goes back to the ISP statutes that you mentioned. We're opening
ourselves up to lawsuits from users who might be upset by some of the more abusive
behaviors that we've tolerated in the past. So we're going to have to enforce more
strict rules about that sort of thing.
<NeppyMan> I suppose I can see that. Anything else you want to say to the people who will be
reading this?
<Mootles> Just to relax and be patient. We're working hard to make the transition as smooth as
possible. We're doing our best to give all our new users the best possible experience.
[edit] "Moot" "Denies" Involvement
In an attempt to quell the impending shitstorm, a sticky appeared on 4chan's /b/ on Monday 10, 2007. Of course, everybody knows that Moot is simply attempting to prevent a rebellion on 4chan's /b/ board, as 7chan's /b/ is currently under siege by many individuals who are expressing their displeasure about the intended merger. The real story is clearly visible here.
Currently, the 'survivors' have evacuated to Zerochan and 711chan, where - like the Mormons - they hole up in their bunker and pass the shortwave radio around by candle light, acting out their "I am Legend" fantasies, while the rest of 7chan laughs at them for thinking the internet is serious business.
[edit] The Copypasta
Created on 7chan's /b/ and used to flood the hell out of 4chan, this delicious copypasta was specifically created with tender loving care to profess one's displeasure of the current situation on 7chan:
As you can see, some people are clearly very concerned about this merger. Soon after the flood, 4chan went down in a lame social engineering attack on the DNS registrar.
[edit] After Math
People don't realize that the 7chan staff like to troll the user base periodically to weed out faggots. It works, but it's incredibly annoying, sometimes the staff push it too far. Things like this are done in subtle ways like partyhard.css. When problems are at extremes (ie: 4chan going down), mods are pretty much allowed to do anything. When 4chan was hacked, /b/ was changed to party mode, an image of a large obese woman was flying around the page, Walk the Dinosaur was played with a flash of two male dinosaurs 69ing, and pretty much anyone complaining was banned.
tl;dr: NOTHING LOL
[edit] Soviet Sunday
On Sunday, December 16th, 2007, Comrade Premier Josef Stalin led a revolution against the hated Moot and took 7chan back from the soup-loving purchaser. The walls of /b/ were splashed red with his blood. The following message was posted on 7chan's front page:
Товарищи! Соотечественники и соотечественницы! Наступил великий день победы над НИГГЭРТИТС. Фашистская НИГГЭРТИТС, поставленная на колени Красной Армией и войсками наших союзников, признала себя побежденной, объявила безоговорочную капитуляцию. Теперь мы можем с полным основанием заявить, что наступил исторический день окончательного разгрома НИГГЭРТИТС, день великой победы нашего народа над империализмом. Великие жертвы, принесенные нами во имя свободы и независимости нашей Родины, неисчислимые лишения и страдания, пережитые нашим народом в ходе войны, напряженный труд в тылу и на фронте, отданный на алтарь отечества, - не прошли даром и увенчались полной победой над врагом. Вековая борьба Анонймоус за свое существование и свою независимость окончилась победой над НИГГЭРТИТС захватчиками и НИГГЭРТИТС тиранией. Отныне над 7чан будет развеваться великое знамя свободы народов и мира между народами. Четыре года назад мут всенародно заявил, что в его задачи входит расчленение Советского Союза. Он прямо заявил: "Мы уничтожим Анонймоус, чтобы он больше никогда не смогла подняться". Это было четыре года назад. Но сумасбродным идеям мут не суждено было сбыться, - ход войны развеял их в прах. На деле получилось нечто прямо противоположное тому, о чем бредили фурфагс. НИГГЭРТИТС разбита наголову. НИГГЭРТИТС войска капитулируют. Советский Союз торжествует победу, хотя он и не собирается ни расчленять, ни уничтожать НИГГЭРТИТС. Товарищи! Великая Отечественная война завершилась нашей полной победой. Период войны в 7чан кончился. Начался период мирного развития. С победой вас, мои дорогие соотечественники и соотечественницы! СЛАВА НАШЕЙ ГЕРОИЧЕСКОЙ КРАСНОЙ АРМИИ, ОТСТОЯВШЕЙ НЕЗАВИСИМОСТЬ НАШЕЙ РОДИНЫ И ЗАВОЕВАВШЕЙ ПОБЕДУ НАД ВРАГОМ! СЛАВА НАШЕМУ ВЕЛИКОМУ НАРОДУ, НАРОДУ-ПОБЕДИТЕЛЮ! ВЕЧНАЯ СЛАВА ГЕРОЯМ, ПАВШИМ В БОЯХ С ВРАГОМ И ОТДАВШИМ СВОЮ ЖИЗНЬ ЗА СВОБОДУ И СЧАСТЬЕ НАШЕГО НАРОДА!
The anthem of the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics could be heard echoing from /b/ to shining /b/ as 7chan users rejoiced in their freedom.
[edit] Translation
Comrades! Compatriots and compatriot! Began great Day of Victory above [NIGGERTITS]. Fascist [NIGGERTITS], set to the elbows of the red By army and by the troops of our allies, it recognized itself as that conquered, declared unconditional surrender. Now we can with good reason state that the historical day of the final crushing defeat began [NIGGERTITS], the day of the great victory of our people above the imperialism. Great victims, brought by us into the name of freedom and independence of our native land, the innumerable deprivations and the sufferings, experienced by our people in the course of war, the strenuous labor in the rear and at the front, returned on the altar of the fatherland, they did not pass by gift and crowned by the complete victory above the enemy. The eternal struggle Of [anonymous] for its existence and its independence was finished by the victory above [NIGGERTITS] by aggressors and [NIGGERTITS] by tyranny. From now on above 7[chan] will flutter the great banner of the freedom of peoples and peace between the peoples. Four years ago [mut] he publicly stated that the breakdown of the Soviet Union enters into its tasks. It directly he stated: " We will destroy [Anonymous] so that it greater than never would be able [podnyatsya]". This was four years back. But to extravagant ideas they [mut] judged it was to happen, the motion of war scattered them to smithereens. In reality came out something the directly opposite to volume, about which were delirious [furfags]. [NIGGERTITS] is broken completely. [NIGGERTITS] the troops capitulate. The Soviet Union celebrates victory, although it is assembled not to dismember, not to destroy [NIGGERTITS]. Comrades! World War II was completed by our complete victory. The period of war into 7[chan] ended. The period of peaceful development began. With the victory you, my dear compatriots and compatriot! GLORY OF OUR HEROIC RED ARMY, WHICH DEFENDED THE INDEPENDENCE OF OUR NATIVE LAND AND THAT CONQUERED VICTORY [NAD] BY ENEMY! GLORY TO OUR GREAT PEOPLE, TO PEOPLE'S VICTOR! ETERNAL GLORY TO HEROES, KILLED IN ACTION FROM THE ENEMY AND THAT RETURNED ITS LIFE FOR THE FREEDOM AND HAPPINESS OF OUR PEOPLE!
[edit] Apocalypse
In May of 2008, 7chan finally collapsed under its own massive failure and went dark. According to such self-important faggots as Necrobilly and Eman, the site is "undergoing staff changes and restructuring", but anyone with half a brain can clearly see that the admins are too busy fingering their own buttholes to get their shit together and bring the site back up.
The closing of 7chan began, as usual, with mod drama. Hero of 7chan and true leader of the people OmgWtfIDiedLol decided one day that 7chan would benefit from having /b/ shut down, to be replaced with a picture of his penis. Humorless asshole Jerrcs felt otherwise and reopened /b/ against Steve's wishes. Shit hit the fan, there was a great wailing and gnashing of teeth, and p4ch3c0, the apathetic bawwwfag owner of 7chan, pulled the plug rather than deal with this small problem. When asked for comment on his decision, p4 stated "fuck all you niggers, I don't give a shit".
7chan is currently without /b/ and in fail mode.
UPDATE: As of last Thursday, /b/ is back. It still fails.
[edit] The Chanese Federation
7chan recently became part of The Chanese Federation. Whoa, really? You are most definitely not being shitted with. The Chanese Federation is a 100% real country located in the North Atlantic between North America and Europe. The real country gained independence on 06/23/08 when the semi-autonomous *chan states of 2chan, 4chan, 420chan, and 7chan joined together. Now all anon have a place to call their own free from typical faggotry but home to brand new faggotry at the same time.
[edit] Yet another death and rebirth
On 7/07/08, after a protracted and brave struggle with terminal cancer, 7chan finally succumbed to the inevitable. After all boards on site were deleted, the admin OverlordXenu left an announcement on the main page that it had been decided that it was for the best that they pull an Ol' Yeller, and took 7chan out back to the woodpile and put it out of its misery.
However, 7chan was only down for about 2 hours. p4ch3c0 finally saw sense and brought it back with /b/, and nothing much else. The internet rejoyced. However, the other boards that have been deleted have not been restored to this day.
Down again the very next week with Chanapocalypse.
[edit] Down Again
As of 07/23/08, 7chan is down again, apparently overloaded by the influx of refu/b/s fleeing the war between the chans and script kiddies. With all the main chans crashed and burning, it looks like anon will be cast once again into diaspora. They are indeed the Jews of the internet.
DISREGARD THAT, it's up again. DISREGARD THAT I SUCK COCKS HEY GUYS IT'S UP YET AGAIN Actually all the boards are down as of August 10. 7chan is closed due to aids..
- 7chan has taken the necessary measures and quarantined itself to protect from infection of AIDS and cancer. It will re-open when the epidemic has died down. MORE like when the furry admins stop bawwing and they re-add the yiff infested lorf board for the 5 time.
[edit] Up Again! New Boards!
As of Aug. 18th, 2008, 7Chan, reclaiming its name as the yo-yo of the chans, is back up, and with some new boards, including /halp/ (help) /me/ (media), /hr/ (low rez), /ani/ (animals (bestiality)), /g/, /e/ (ecchi, a nudity-only cute anime chick board), and the return of /34/, a board dedicated to helping people reconnect with their pasts. Also now a /pz/, password protected area.
[edit] External Links
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7chan is part of a series on Child Abuse. |
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Categories: Sites | 4chan
