Alan Turing
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
| Interesting Fact: This article contains an hero. |
Notorious British nerd partially responsible for inventing the internet. England pwned the world by causing him to kill himself.
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[edit] Short Life
He created the worlds most advanced code breaking computer and cracked some nazi codes including enigma, making him a proto-h4ck3r, and thus helped to win the war and keep England out of the Reich. Without him the world would have been fucked in the ass by hitler.
The British Government thanked him for saving their lives by arresting him for being gay. They forced him to take female hormones because back in those fucktarded times they thought that if you were gay you were really the opposite gender.
He wasn't allowed to work with computers anymore even though he was a fucking genius because his colleagues were batshit crazy homophobes. As he wasn't actually transsexual he became depressed and killed himself.
[edit] Suicide
Through his death Alan not only proved himself to be an hero but also enormously gay. As he was a huge fan of "Snow white and the seven dwarves" he killed himself by lacing an apple with cyanide. The world is yet to see a more gay death than this and probably never will.
A recent article in The New Yorker magazine has alleged that Turing may not have killed himself, but rather pwned by the British intelligence.[1] After Turing was exposed as a catcher and not a pitcher when it came to getting raped in the ass by his big fatass neighboor Paul, it was no longer possible for him to get buttsecks in the Britain. Thus, he started making frequent trips to Eastern Europe in search of buttsecks with 13-year-old boys. The British intelligence were worried that Turing was trading state secrets with the commies for buttsecks, and may have pwned him as result.
It was rumoured that the original rainbow Apple logo was invented to pay homage to Alan and the apple he killed himself with, but as the "fag flag" wasn't invented until two years later, that would be impossible.
[edit] Intelligent Internets
He also invented the Turing Test in 1950, a method to measure intelligence in computers through a chat-room. If you replace a person with a computer without seeing it happen and can't tell the difference then the computer has intelligence.
Machines haven't yet passed the Turing Test as demonstrated by the current Governor of California in "The Terminator".
Most IRC users also fail this test.
[edit] See Also
| Alan Turing is part of a series on serious business |
Internet Law • Irony • Internet disease • Internet drama • Internet stalking • Identity theft • Free Speech • Operation Falcon Punch Serious People |
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Alan Turing is part of a series on An Hero. |
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