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Anonquestions

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Made for a secrets post in anonqsecrets, this image accurately describes what all anonquestions users think.
Made for a secrets post in anonqsecrets, this image accurately describes what all anonquestions users think.

Anonquestions was created by lj user nwa, who is currently the president maintainer. Abbreviated as anonq, this livejournal community may not be the asshole of the internet, but it might just be the ballsack. It has also been referred to as "the biggest shit hole I have ever seen". The intent of anonquestions was to serve as a place where people would ask questions or post things under the name Anonymous, but this practice proved too difficult because of livejournal's impossible spambot challenges. Regulars or "regs" were then born, both tainting the precious anonymous environment of the community and creating a whole new league of drama. Warning: May contain elitist assholes with a generic taste in music, who enjoy acting holier than thou 24/7.

Anonquestions was based off a Gayestjournal community.

Contents

[edit] Regulars

To be a regular in anonquestions, you must have balls of steel and own a pitchfork, because there is an abundance of anonymous posters who unleash an unbridled amount of hatred and bias (The purpose anonyminity tends to serve, after all). Anonymous must be careful, however, because 95.9% of the regs are females between the ages of 15-25, which means raging amounts of estrogen fill the community hourly. There are very few male regs - 5, to be exact. You will probably be ignored if you weren't a 'reg' since the first post, don't do some major ass kissing or have a generic taste in shitty music The list of royal assholes goes as follows:

  • derektrainwreck Infamous douchebag. Referred to by haters as derekfacewreck. Has since left anonq, but likes to pop up from time to time where he is hit with a barrage of the usual hate.
  • kyuss Moderator, proud Aussie, and Good Charlotte fanatic. Will pwn anyone, and do it well. Only shows up to make new posts.
  • washmymicrobus Used to fangirl over Marilyn Manson, has recently switched to sucking Jimmy Urine's dick. Loves to babble on about things she knows nothing about.
  • righteouskungfu Formerly robdyrdek, ex-mod, widely known as the most sane member of the community, lover of all things Travis McCoy and Lupe Fiasco. clandestineplot Accomplice.
  • ghost_dance Most sexually active member of anonquestions. Azn and proud. Half azn whore. Enjoys telling everyone in anonq that they have no life.
  • terrrrrible Token beard, computer reprairmanmanman, headset owner. Has a sexy voice. Is currently porking Bzani.
  • spoonys Known for her custardbaby icon, posts occasionally with the most random things.
  • should Popular member, fan of Nick Zinner.
  • moot Fangirl of bands with big hair. Wants to marry a /b/ tard. Has since disappeared.
  • looseleaves Fangirl of Long Island bands and horridratings. Once well liked by anons she is now considered a raging eilitist cunt. Enjoys telling other people that their taste in music is horrible. clandestineplot Accomplice. Outed for being a sif.
  • james_dewees Accepted as the nicest member of the community. Wants to make babies with Matt Skiba. Enjoys giving rimjobs to the mods.
  • pirateh00ker The scene queen of anonquestions and is frequently praised for her excellent halloween costume boyfriend looks like a dyke. Recently showed up and asked if we missed her. Was met with no responses.
  • lolyouhavecrabs Was outed by derektrainwreck for having an embarrassing anonymous crush on him, has been m.i.a. from anonquestions ever since.

[edit] The Anons

Anonquestions would be nothing without its anons. Without them, who would bitch about shit no one cares about? Some of the more well-known anons are mean!anon! (although the mean!anon label essentially applies to any anon talking shit), sparkle!anon! (who has since then come forward and lost her anonymous title), and the beloved recap!anon!/MS paint!anon, who has been MIA for quite some time now. There is also mr_deadhorse, who is partially anonymous as no one knows their true identity. Mr_deadhorse lurks anonquestions and only speaks when he feels as though he was metaphorically beaten (Beating a dead horse, get it? Get it??). For example; when an anon - or a reg - steps out of line and won't shut the fuck up about subjects that are old meme.

[edit] Trolls

Every community has trolls, and anonquestions is no exception. Some such trolls include:

  • xpressive_me Allegedly just returned from Africa where she saw monkeys and individuals missing crucial body parts, such as eyes. She is also known to have a fugly dog icon.
  • anthonyway Also falls under the troll category, although some beg to differ.

All trolls are invited to crawl back underneath their respective bridges immediately.


[edit] Drama Llama

Anonquestions has been around to provide lulz (except not really, nothing they do is funny) since 2006. In that time its members have experienced over 9000 dramatic episodes. Below are the most epic.

  • underage n00dz scandal: Previous livejournal user wisefools posted nudes of scene queen Audrey Kitching in which she is supposedly underage. She was reported by someone unknown and was permab& by lj support. Several usernames she has come back under have been b& as well.
  • receiving h8 g8: Was a complete tyrant during her time as mod and got butthurt after her epic demoding.
  • clandestineplot g8: A group of 8 or 9 regs from the anonq chat managed to hoodwink the entire internet into believing that Panic At The Disco and Travis Mccoy were going to cover an aggressively sub-par NSYNC song, 'Space Cowboys'. They also started and maintained rumors that the much-maligned Eliza Cuts was doing a stint in a South Dakota rehab facility. When their shenanigans were met with mixed reactions among the anonq crows, they created clandestineplot as an alternative place to discuss their epic pranks. Lets all be in awe of how ~clever they are lolololol epik!~1!!11!
  • the time we broke livejournal's brain: once an anonq post went over the livejournal max comment allowance of 5000 comments, leading to 5003. Much lulz was shared in the chat when this happened.
  • post numba four-t-seven: when nwa told anonq that it was difficult being a lesbian, the entire community shared what was essentially a night of holding hands around a campfire. Much love was spread, as the deepest elements of each of them were laid out into the open. No one wanted to go to sleep because they all knew that when they woke up in the morning they would start hating on each other again, which, unsurprisingly, they did.
  • post #38: Starting on page 2 with a comment by troll anthonyway, the post became quickly filled with hate and mod-bashing. There were chat logs posted (some real and some fake), MCR fans alienated, spam posted, and in the end, the post was just as epic as the first comment predicted.
  • derekfacewreck h8 g8: Derektrainwreck, a hipster of about twenty, was e-shat on by most of anonq for a douchebag, which led to the resentful nickname of 'derekfacewreck'. Most of anonquestions dislikes him, but he does have a handful of good friends in the community to vouch for his "goodness". For a short amount of time, he brought his friend ashleybighair into the community, although she was promptly shooed out by angry anons and regs.
  • youre_noelvis h8 g8: For a while anons scrutinized youre_noelvis because of her large Italian eyebrows, but later an anon got bored and stirred up some drama with the accusation that youre_noelvis talked shit about other anonq regs behind their backs. The anon failed miserably, because no evidence of such shit talking was ever presented (pix or it didn't happen, after all).
  • 24_hr_party_ppl dramallama: My Chemical Romance fan, Natalie first came to light posting a tale of meeting My Chemical Romance on chemicalromance). An "anon" who was later revealed to be Maz posted an epic hate post about her involving false allegations such as "she tried to make out with frank" and worse, while anonq almost combusted as it took sides. She is now regarded as 'old meme' as nothing of truth was ever discussed in anonq.
  • mod drama: Over the course of a few posts, sets of mods were fired and hired rapidly. During this time period, accusations of "powertripping" ran rampant.
  • internpartysystem/heykerri h8 g8: Anonq reg youre_noelvis began an internship at stolentransmission records, and with that internship grew an e-group called internpartysystem that was intent to spread the word of ST bands. Anons got jealous and butthurt and began to talk shit about youre_noelvis. Then cue in 'heykerri', who created the end all of all comments ever on anonquestions, attempting to pwn those who were talking shit. In the process, however, she insulted all of the anonq members instead. This is the only time when all the regs banded together - their mission was to rip heykerri a new one. The regs prevailed; she has never been seen on anonq since, since she is too busy sucking dick and dressing like a dirty hipster in order to make it in the highly coveted music industry.
  • n00b g8: Members from the widely disliked communities oicfbr and fbr_trash began to post in anonq, but were cockblocked by an anon mole who copypasted their locked entries from oicfbr into anonq for all to see.
  • Satarah g8: An anon posted a screencap from Satarah's myspace ( newsprint's ) of a message posted by some guy in Pencey Prep (former band of Frank Iero), and nwa noticed that it looked like she had 'capped her own Myspace in order to get attention. This led to page after page of lols and accusations as people chose "teams." A couple of hours after this discovery was made, Satarah re-emerged from wherever she was and said that her Myspace had been hacked. The jury's still out on this one. Now, any time Satarah posts anything in anonq someone inevitably brings up this incident. This has effectively driven her out of anonq.
  • ZANI G8 O8:

ZANI N00DZ LEAKED BY UNKNOWN. DELETED. ANONS KEEP REPOSTING N00DZ, TO BE DELETED BY NWA. SOMEONE POSTED N00DZ ON 4CHAN. 4CHAN FOUND ZANIS MYSPACE, BUZZNET ETC BECAUSE THE FILE WAS NAMED "BZANNNNIII" OR SOMETHING. TERRRRRIBLE AND FACEWRECK WERE BROUGHT UP IN THE 4CHAN THREAD. ONOEZ. ZANIS DAD COMMENTED ZANIS MYSPACE. "I WILL CRY IF 4CHAN COMMENTS HIM W/ MY N00DZ". ZANI DELETES COMMENT FROM HER DAD. ANON CLAIMS THAT ZANIS N00DZ ARE ON YOUPORN. ANON CONFESSSES HE WAS LYING. DIFFERENT ANON POSTS N00DZ ON XTUBE.

  • The Milestone Incident: pansylove was talking about the Brand new song, "Millstone," and how much it moved her, but she accidently typed it as "Milestone." All of the Brand New clique got butthurt and jumped down the OP's throat, saying, "you're doing it wrong." Many LOLZ were had at the overreactions. Quite possibly the best overreaction was made by looseleaves :"lol the thing is though, it absolutely DOES change the ENTIRE meaning of the song. it's called 'millstone,' a word which means a heavy emotional burden, commonly used in the phrase 'a millstone around one's neck.' the lyrics jesse sings are 'I'm my own stone around my neck,' which imply he causes his own burdens and whatnot. the song has fucking NOTHING to do with milestones of any sort, so yeah, to me that misheard lyric implies that the OP doesn't actually get the point of the song. sorry." No reason to be such an elitist, lol. Go cry about it, emo. What we have learned, is that obviously, Brand New lyrics are SERIOUS FUCKING BUSINESS.
  • Invasion No. 2:

Starting at the end of post #56, we got Invaded by fbrt and chaos ensued. The post will be forever known as epic because the first comment was FUCK MY ASS, and we broke anonq temporarily.

  • Fbr_t/Tigassbitties:

Clearly the most epic post in anonq history, fbr_t invaded anonq and made the post move from page nine to page thirty-four in one night. Drinks were had, big font was used, people fangirled over washmymicrobus, and they all made a new community called tigassbitties.

[edit] Widely Used Phrases

Some sayings and phrases have become so common in anonquestions that they've reached the point of meme status. The most famous are "if you don't like it, just scroll on bai~*~*", "in before ________", "you forgot italics", "stop posting about yourself", and "powertripping", the latter used in regards to mods who are thought to be taking advantage of their power.

In addition to widely used phrases, there are many commonly posted items in anonq, which generally end up being old meme. These include, but are not limited to: "Post your most recent picture!", "Who's your favorite/least favorite reg?", "Who is hottest/ugliest in anonq?!?~!", "What is ___________'s screen name?", "Where can I find (insert song name here)?", "How do I rip videos from Youtube?" and other such mundane nonsense. Most posts also contain a "post your desktop" thread as well as a Frank Iero appreciation thread.

[edit] MCR vs. Brand New

In some people's minds, there is a veritable e-chasm between the two main "cliques" in anonquestions - the MCR fans and the Brand New fans. Although not all members are fans of either band, they tend to be grouped as such.

Members such as deathnotronik, chromasunrise, pandagore, hormones, yunaresuka, and misselegy are considered in the "MCR fan" group.

In contrast, members such as turtlehippo, receiving, looseleaves, horridratings, youre_noelvis, terrrrrible, and scheme are considered in the "Brand New fan" group.


[edit] In Conclusion

Anonquestions is a giant waste of time.


[edit] Spinoffs

Anonquestions has spawned a few spin-off communities, including:

  • anonscreenames, which was created to curb the incessant demands of teenage scene kids who apparently want to talk to people who impersonate Gerard Way and Pete Wentz. This journal is no longer active.
  • anonqsecrets: An anonquestions-related secrets journal akin to ljsecret was created by a few anonq users, who kept their identities secret by making a journal instead of a community. It was an epic failure, and was incredibly short lived because of the simple fact that no one gave a damn.
  • mcr_anonq: A splinter group of MCR fans felt ostracized and after calling the waaambulance under the pretense of being "ostracized" and "alienated", they created their own community, meant to prove to the rest of anonq what special snowflakes all MCR fans are. This community was intended to oust anonq from its mighty role as the go-to place for anon lols, but it never got that far. It became overrun by faggot rpers and was abandoned by the original members.
  • fuckanon, which was an attempt to round together the people who commented under their usernames. But with only 49 comments, this community proved to be an epic fail.
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