greets to the final bosses of internet: cromlech, aush0k, dshocker, atomiku, Romford trev, piddle, rolo, baz.

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

Forced meme ALERT: Bill Kaulitz will be posted by the same unfunny newfag until you like it.

Billie "Bill" Kaulitz is the female lead singer of German pop-rock band "Tokio Hotel". Recently, she's became a minor internet anti-meme, commonly featured in /b/ and elsewhere with posts of her stunning photos and brief mention of her androgynous first name. Typically, this is followed by Admiral Ackbar posts intended to trick newfags into believing that there's more to her than meets the eye. Bill is the real-life equivalent of Bridget.

"Bill Jokes" often refer to her neo-emo goth punk rock appearance and her gorgeous-yet-far-out hairstyles.

Q: What would you do for Bill?
A: Loan her my razor and a noose.

Contents 1 Early Years 2 Countdown 3 Tokio Hotel 4 Cute Stuff 5 Chan Fandom - /b/ill takes over 6 MOAR 6.1 LOVE LIFE 6.2 Bill Kaulitz now an Hero 7 SHOW'S CANCELLED DUE TO AIDS 8 Gallery of BAWWWWWW

[edit] Early Years

Bill initially rose to fame as a quarter-finalist in 2001 Germany's Star Search competition, where her likeness was compared to the delicious young Natalie Portman in Luc Besson's 1994 film "Leon: The Professional", which co-starred the juicy Jean Reno and famed character actor Gary Oldman.

Arguably, the only thing keeping her from winning was the unfortunate fact that, at the time, her voice sounded like a bag of kittens being run through a garden tiller.

[edit] Countdown

Bill, and her fraternal twin brother Tom, were born on September 1st, 1989. Despite the fact that she's legally been able to consent to sex for the past 6 years under German law, several dozen websites ran 18-year countdown clocks to commemorate her birthday.

[edit] Tokio Hotel

Her band, "Tokio Hotel", was named after an Asian county and the American word for "Hostel." They've had a string of successful albums and hits over the last few years, including...

• "Schrei - so laut du kannst" - "Sex - so long as you can"
• "Übers Ende der Welt" - "Udders That I've Felt"
• "An Deiner Seite (Ich Bin Da)" - "A Dinner Swiss (Boom Ba)"
• "Durch den Monsun" - "Fuck The Monsoons"
• "Jung und Nicht Mehr Jugendfrei" - "Jews Stole my Testosterone"

Unfortunately, everyone forgets the band because of the beauty of frontwoman Bill and the fact the others are all ugly. Bill's twin occasionally makes an appearance for twincest fics, but generally no one knows who the other two are and quite frankly no one wants to. Anything related to Tokio Hotel often turns into vicious drama instigated by fanfags and haters due to TH being the most simultaneously loved and hated band in the world. Here is an accurate transcript:

billkaulitzwife4evax: omg, lIKE, i love tokio hoteal its like the most punk baend ever bill is sooooo dreamy

maggot666: wtf u faggot y dont u listen to tru mettl lyk Slipknot and System of a Down insted of these fudge packrs who r totally being manipualetd by the corpoatiaons

billkaulitzwife4evax: stfu, how can i b a faggot if im a gurl!!

maggot666: fuck u bitch suck my penus i am a real man unnlyk these FAGS!

Just remember, no matter how female Bill may be, fapping to her still makes you gay. It doesn't even matter that you're a straight guy that first noticed how feminine Bill was, you are gay, if only a little. It doesn't matter if you still like other girls and exclaim over and over that you're straight. Bill is still there in the back of your mind haunting your heterosexuality. That includes all you talking vaginas with computers in your kitchens. Everyone is gay for Bill.

[edit] Cute Stuff

Bill Kaulitz, aged 13, singing "It's raining men." with German lyrics.

[edit] Chan Fandom - /b/ill takes over

Note: Some of these guys have obviously never read this article, and don't quite have their facts straight.

“	Fuck you guys. Since you started posting pictures of him every day, I have seriously gotten gay. Not that guys in general turns me on, just this guy. I want to fuck him so bad, even though I have never had any gaytendensees.	„
—Anonymous, on /b/

“	Bill Kaulitz threads are the only reason I visit 4chan now.	„
—Anonymous, on /b/

“	I love him. With all of my soul. I want to lick his soft sweet face, feel his frail, sweet body against mine, I want to rub my cock against his leg... I don't even want to cum on/in him because he's soo delicate. I just want him to tease me, to hold him in my arms; Tom meanwhile is under the covers, toying my cock with his tongue, then sucking it deeply....oh god bill is now murmuring in my ear.... BRB church.	„
—Anonymous

“	Despite his utter lack of breasts, and stupid hair, I want to bang him so bad. His brother Bill's gonna get it too.	„
—Anonymous

“	Straight fag here, who's comfortably with his sexuality, ergo, can fap to a guy not be gay.	„
—Anonymous

A good majority of them can be found at Bestuffintheworld

[edit] MOAR

Out of fapping material? http://www.megaupload.com/?d=ksohggr4

[edit] LOVE LIFE

Apart from banging her twin brother, Bill is currently in a hot and heavy relationship with every last member of another German band Cinema Bizarre, and, of course, the German rapper Bushido.

[edit] Bill Kaulitz now an Hero

http://147.102.135.118/cnn.html# According to CNN, Ms. Kaulitz and her goatse-loving friend Tom became an heroes.

[edit] SHOW'S CANCELLED DUE TO AIDS

In March of 2008, Bill suddenly became very ill, and had to cancel a show in Portugal. This caused the concert to be cancelled, and subsequently, copious amounts of butthurt from emo girls. This was actually one of the finest pieces of drama ever, which gathered thousands of people in one place and then had some guy telling everyone to GTFO, resulting in massive ammounts of wrist cutting blood. When asked if she did it for the lulz, she said she just had too much cock down her throat.

[edit] Gallery of BAWWWWWW

Footage from the concert, complete with deafening screams

News coverage of the incident