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Turk Diddler
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Contents |
[edit] Description
An English, sociopathic, dog-kicking, nude self-portraiting, agoraphobic, depressive, passive-aggressive, sometimes downright aggressive, melodramatic, long-haired, tall, egotistical, non-working, parent-hating, narcissistic, exhibitionist, male basement-dweller who is a frequent contributer to Fade to Black forums and LiveJournal. Everyone hates him.
[edit] Interesting facts about Turk Diddler
- His Power Word is James.
- His poor, beaten, half-starved dog's name is Toby.
- Toby's leg was broken on Friday, December 10th, 2004 (later modified to "severe ligament damage").
- Turk Diddler denies that he raped a Hippo.
- He is a misogynist.
- Spiraling self-destructive dance into the vortex of existential agony.
- His favorite color is black, though it's not really a color.
- Turk's favorite words are bah and blah.
- He describes every woman he's ever been involved with as a "slut who messed him around." Apparently they only wanted him for his body.
- Rumored to be the original goatse man - his one true claim to fame.
- He doesn't know when a conversation is over and it's time to shut up.
- He's not worth a reply.
- He's less popular than crap.
- He's probably the only person in the world less cool than you!
- Other than that, he's not such a bad guy.
[edit] Chat (excerpts)
01:42:41 [Turk_Diddler] Do you want to see my erect penis?
01:44:50 [Turk_Diddler] Everyone hates me.
01:57:23 [Turk_Diddler] Turk_Diddler is lonely.
01:57:58 [Turk_Diddler] I kicked my dog.
01:59:44 [Turk_Diddler] You're all sluts and over 30.
02:01:55 [Turk_Diddler] Gosh I'm cynical.
02:03:27 [Turk_Diddler] Men are just horrible!
[edit] The Wisdom of Turk
- It is wiser to avoid flirtatious 30-something internet whores, particularly when they have boyfriends and/or a husband.
- You know, I really am convinced most people who know me hate me.
