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From Encyclopedia Dramatica

Note: this is an article about an Encyclopedia Dramatica user. For more information, please see the appropriate user page. To leave this user a message, please visit User_Talk:Cameljacks. Also leave a message on his boyfriend's sockpuppet which he used to vandalize this page at User_Talk:Camelcide and the rest of Camel's circlejerk he has edit ED for him.

Camelejaculation is a stupid TARTlet fag who really really wanted to be a devianTART admin. When he didn't get his way he went batshit all over TARTland instead, picking internets fights like an internet tough guy. However, he must be a retard and have medications he neglects to take because his ramblings don't make sense to anyone but himself.

Contents 1 Art 2 Cameljaculation and Sockpuppetry 2.1 On ED 2.2 On dA 3 Camelejaculation vs. Lolly 3.1 Camelejaculation Quits dA Almost 4ever 3.1.1 Cameljack Comes Back 3.2 Lol How Do I Got Banned For Real? 3.2.1 Harvested Lulz 3.2.2 Permabanned 4 Lol Opinions 4.1 Quotes 4.1.1 On Winning Internets Arguments 4.1.2 On Schizophrenia 4.1.3 On Overwrought Arguing 4.1.4 On Faggotry 4.2 Massive Ego 4.3 Cameljacker On Religion 5 Disturbing Pokemon Obsession 6 Camelejaculation and Terrorism 7 NOT BUTTHURT 8 External Links

[edit] Art

Camelejaculation's great arts consist of half-assed emoticons and vector, which is the fine art of tracing over other people's shit with Adobe Illustrator. You know his vectors are really deep and meaningful because he always slaps some grunge effects on them. All of his vector art has a real "art school" flavor to it.

[edit] Cameljaculation and Sockpuppetry

[edit] On ED

Cameljacker came onto ED under one of ShadowGamers' sockpuppets, Autistic, to try and blank this article out of extreme butthurt like the big gay crybaby he is. SG confirms and ED checked teh ips. See the history here, lol. After that ShadowGamers made Camelejaculation mad and Cameljacker took SG off his friendslist :(

[edit] On dA

Here we see someone who has the same typing habits (like putting shit in bold instead of italics) as cameljaculation, sounds just like him, using the same arguments and phrases as him, who links to another forum post where cameljaculation totally pwns another TARTlet (by informing them "irregardless" is a word! Holy shit OWNED!) and knows everything about him down to what type of schizophrenia he has and also happens to have schizophrenia themself, defending cameljaculation on another TARTlet's journal that criticizes him. lol sockpuppet. Read all the lulz here: [2] [3] [4] [5]

lol it's just a really really really really good friend of cameljack. Really.

Link in the sig in the last screencap: [1] Camelejaculation wants to win an internet argument so badly he has to team up with his sockpuppet. He claims it's not a sockpuppet but his good friend who he got to edit ED for him.

When failure is imminent, bring in the sockpuppet to lick ass! Or, as he claims, Camel just likes to surround himself in the comfort of his circlejerk

[edit] Camelejaculation vs. Lolly

Camelejaculation seems to have some sort of rivalry going on with dA's drunken douchebag clown admin Lolly, who he's managed to piss off severely. Camel's apparently been sending him over 9000 private notes a day whining about other TARTlets, claiming to be a "disorganized schizophrenic", demanding that Lolly ban his enemies from the internets both on and off deviantART and all while probably still trying to become a banhammer-wielding admin in the process. Recently he and Lolly got into it in a lulzy forum thread about ED started by Caylin. It's like some sort of delicious cake ED trifecta: [6]

<camelhijackation> koffeeben: oh nothing much, getting flamed by a clown

[edit] Camelejaculation Quits dA Almost 4ever

After this incident and after this article was written, Cameljacker came crawling to Lolly requesting his devianTART account be "closed" (which really amounts to permabanning it at the request of the user.) And this was right after it had already been suspended for a week when he caused a bitchfest on a news article. He says on his other account that this closing is a temporary measure:

“	I'm on an extend leave, if you're wondering why my main account is b&. I won't be here for a while so I asked Papa Clowns to "close" my account temporarily. This account is still open because I intend to occasionally upload new emotions of the course of my holiday.	„
—Cameljack, on why he deleted his account.</small>

[edit] Cameljack Comes Back

Like most people who "leave" internets communities, Cameljacker came back about a week later. He claims he had expected to be gone for several months, but his "business" was shorter than anticipated. Immediately upon his return he ran to devianTART's Complaints Forum for his fix, applying his unique style of arguement to a discussion about The Simpsons and Family Guy. For srs. See "Quotes" for moar.

[edit] Lol How Do I Got Banned For Real?

Cameljacker didn't have the sense to keep his retardation in the Politics Forum where it belonged and continued to troll around the Complaints Forum instead, the most popular forum on devianTART. First he made a thread about how bad devianTART's new policy allowing TARTlets to "call out" and insult each other in journals and the forums was and how stupid call-out threads were. Lolly, demonstrating that the policy change was made just so he could bitch out users without being called a hypocrite, went off on Cameljack and pwned him in the lulziest of ways, declaring to all of devianTART that Cameljacker had been sending him private messages every day and was in general an annoying butthurt retard.

“	I don't insult those who disagree with me. I simply am tired of you and how much time you wasted. Meaning, you are a waste of time. How many notes did I get that basically went "lolly lolly the bad peopls are picking on poor me but noooooooone of it is my fault and lolly lolly they wroted bad stuffs about me on ED and lolly lolly come ban them ALL lolly!" You are a joke who goes around picking fights and runs to teacher. Your repeated homophobic bashing in recent threads should also cease. It makes you look like the narrow minded brat you are.	„
—Lolly, Erupting like a lolcano

During this argument it also seemed that Cameljacker wanted to issue a lawlsuit against devianTART because he thought his account was hacked in 2006 and his PERSONAL INFO got stoled! You'd think if he had gotten hacked there would have been moar tubgirl at the time, but Camel claims he only just thought to report it now.

“	I put up little E-Advertisements "Please anally rape my account while I am asleep"	„
—Cameljacker, Well he is asking for it</small>

“	Nobody slipped under anyones nose and stole private information from your account. That would mean they got into your account and there is no record of anyone but you on your IP logs in it, so take that legal matter card and toss it as it has no weight. We banned the people spamming your page much like we do everyone, but then your gave me some laundry list of demands of who I needed to get rid of and that I needed to somehow go around and play internet cop off of deviantART.	„
—Lolly, Bitching that Cameljack always comes BAWWWWWWing to him

“	I don't have better secuirty on my PC, I just don't keep any personal infomation on my PC. The only place in the world with my infomation, is your site. The only place that this infomation could of came from, was my account. There is no way working around this. My personal infomation that became public, is directly related to this site.	„
—Cameljacker, on being full of shit. We never even put up his dox

“	So I am confused here, a year or so back someone accessed your account and they just now sent you your billing address and I was supposed to have done something about it a year ago...or i am just supposed to magically deduce who this person is as you have sent in no proof nor taken any steps to report it? You make no sense and are trying to make some vague psuedo legal issue out of the fact that you are an ass and don't want to be banned, so you are flat out lying in public about things you have absolutely no proof of. Where has this info been posted publically? Oh, it hasn't? And what does it contain, your address? yeah you post on sites like ED and you don't expect people there to be able to track you down via your name and IP. You don't send anyone emails with your real name?You ONLY go to deviantART and you never talk to anyone on MSN/AIM/ etc? ... You don't keep personal info on your home PC so what did you do, go to the library to enter your billing info? And what, DA is the only site that has your billing info? This whole issue seems solidly on your end.	„
—Lolly, pwning Cameljackoff again

After this thread fell off the Complaints Forum Cameljacker made another, this time calling out another TARTlet, despite having just made a thread that said CALL OUTS IS BAD!!1 As usual you can't really understand what the fuck he's talking about but the gist of it is: Cameljacker witnessed another TARTlet, "OuroborosCobra", being called a filthy Jew, OuroborosCobra was offended, Cameljacker arrived on the scene to pour salt in OuroborosCobra's wounds and then Cameljacker made a new thread to further mock OuroborosCobra's Jewery. Apparently Cameljacker was on "semi-good" terms with OuroborosCobra (lol not anymore) and figured since he was being a dick to one of his friends he wouldn't get banned for it. How wrong he was!

“	Well I am very much against callouts. So I picked someone who I don't think would try to ban me and is on semi-good relations with me. Who knows, they might get offended. Of course, I will apologise if they do. But the other point I'm making here is, don't make a call-out thread seem like one if you must do one. This will be the only one I do, so don't worry.	„
—Cameljacker, On being a hypocritical dick

“	Well enough to understand that Lolly is right about you, that you earned almost every word of your ED article? That you earn the spamming you get?	„
—OuroborosCobra, bringin' the truth

“	He got the 30 days off he was asking for all year.	„
—Lolly, on bringing down the banhammer

[edit] Harvested Lulz

Lolly correctly stating Cameljacker is butthurt over this journal.	Camelhijackation's threads are serious business	Cap of the original thread where Camel calls out OuroborosCobra. He named it "Jewish Clensing", Camel leik holocaust joke!	"Allowing people to call others out is like instantly turning a thread into an unintelligent flame war. It's just an ego-booster for people hungry for attention". We agree, Cameljackoff!
Cameljacker is against call-outs, which is why he called out another TARTlet for being offended at being called a filthy Jew	The TARTlet Cameljacker called out lulzing at his 30 day ban	Cameljacker gently consoling OuroborosCobra by explaining to him why he should just bend over and take it	Cameljacker claiming that anyone who posts in the same forum as him and mentions his fucktarded behavior is stalking him

[edit] Permabanned

Cameljacker has apparently gotten himself permanently banned from devianTART. Details are fuzzy, but rumor has it he's been harassing Lolly outside of devianTART. lol.

[edit] Lol Opinions

Camelejaculate spends spent most of his time in the Complaints and Politics forums of dA: the two big, festering boils on the filthy, shit-stained ass that is devianTART. It's there he picks fights and is quick to go on long, boring, indignant speeches about how people are attacking him with "baseless accusations" (his most favorite term ever) when they point out he's an idiot and is making no sense. Did we mention he gets incredibly pissed off when no one can understand WTF he's on about?

He also has a huge problem with atheists for some unclear reason, in fact he's trying to get a member of the atheist club banned from dA for saying he hates beaners and those dumb, unwashed frogs.

[edit] Quotes

[edit] On Winning Internets Arguments

“	The fact that you believe there is only one reason ... you've discredited your own arguments. Not nice making faulty dichotomies, you know."	„
—Cameljacker, Misusing big words as he does 90% of the time

“	Furthermore your opinion was discredited because you stated your opinion was the only reason, When clearly your opinion isn't the only "reason" or the only opinion of why this happened	„
—Cameljackoff, Trying to change the subject in a debate he doesn't understand.

This is how Camelejaculation "wins" 99% of his arguments. Actually coming up with points to argue is too juvenile and passé for him, the right way to do things is to declare everything an opinion and that all opinions are invalid. Except his, of course. [7][8]

[edit] On Schizophrenia

“	I'd prefer if you didn't mock my malady. It was a rather low cheapshot.	„
—Cameljacker, You shouldn't mock his insanity just because he was stupid enough to try and use it as an excuse

“	I wasn't aware everyone literally has disorganized schizophrenia by your underestimation of a psychological problem.	„
—Cameljacker, Schizophrenia is SERIOUS BUSINESS

“	you just don't understand the complexity of a serious mental affliction and you have to erroneously compare it to something that is nothing closely related to it"	„
—Cameljackoff, We just don't UNDERSTAND him!

“	My problems with tone is that since age 16 I've been plagued with disorganised schizophrenia and lack many of the emotions that all you wonderful people get to have. I don't ever tolerate cheap shots about my personal afflictions, you should learn some respect.	„
—Cameljacker, Asking for respect on the internets

“	A mild form of paranoid schizophrenia, and being too damn sexy, it know its horrible but some how I live with it. but yeah, schizophrenia sucks, inherieted from my father.	„
—Cameljackoff, Can't decide what kind of schizophrenia he has

Paranoid -or- Disorganized... Paranoid -or- Disorganized... Paranoid -or- Disorganized? Hmmmmmm....take your pick. Camelejaculation, you see, claims to have a very serious condition where he can't express tone. You know. In text. I guess. And this is supposedly why no one ever understands what the hell he's trying to say. It's NOT just because he's an idiot. He also claims to be schizophrenic, which actually would explain a lot. Oh and don't forget, you need to R.E.S.P.E.C.T him for being C.R.A.Z.Y [9][10] [11][12][13]

[edit] On Overwrought Arguing

NOTE: The following Camel quotes are from an argument about how Family Guy sucks and copies The Simpsons in some random thread. But Cameljack's not taking it seriously at all, he just likes insulting people over the smallest, most unimportant shit and the sound of his own awkwardly applied vocabulary. Emphasis added to the most WTF statements.

“	There is no need for counterpoints when the points in dispute are so soaked in bias, only serving to defame the fanbase and creators of the show they don't like. So when you actually have some valid points aside from the date of production, I'd be happy to give you some counterpoints.	„
—Cameljack, Arguing about Family Guy.

“	No, what are you bitching about? I'm not condemning him for his opinion, I'm condemning him for his inaccuracy, generalisations, and unjustified defamation. If you looked past your blind sighted reply and re-read my posts, you'd see that. But instead of that you come and attack me without even having the slightly clue what you or I'm arguing, it seems.	„
—Cameljack, Arguing about Family Guy.

“	And lastly, nearly his entire opinion in this argument, was based on those logical fallacies. Do you not consider his opinions important? If those logical fallacies are unimportant so is his personal view.	„
—Cameljack, Arguing about Family Guy.

“	I'm sorry, I don't abridge my text for the mentally challenged. If three paragraphs and a stand alone sentence are too daunting for you, I'd suggest you revisit elementary school.	„
—Cameljack, Arguing about Family Guy.

“	I wasn't aware I was taking this seriously. I thought this was an open forum where I could call someone out for being wrong when they are most incorrect in their statements. Apparently anything that transcends an infantile response seems to be "serious" to you. I was under the assumption that taking this seriously would mean that I would devote precious time, instead of free time, to this argument.	„
—Cameljack, Arguing about Family Guy.

“	Is that why you failed to back up what you stated, misconstrued what I said, attacked me directly, and failed to disprove my arguments though some of your claims suggested it wasn't true? That sounds like losing to me. Not very cool, to lose so undignified. Seriously, you'll have to find a new name now since it isn't true.	„
—Cameljack, Arguing about Family Guy.

“	And that would make claiming you are cool pointless as well, now wouldn't it? Oh my yes. There is no way to back up your claim, and your claim was invalid to begin with. Yet you argued irrelevancies instead of arguing the argument at hand. Twisting your way out of your failed argument.	„
—Cameljack, He's arguing about fucking Family Guy! Jesus Christ!

[edit] On Faggotry

“	I call my clothing style Popdada, I usually buy my own jeans (levis) and will cut, lace, dye, blast, stain -etc intill I find it completly badass. Shoes are always a adidas/puma green or teal colour. Shirts come from the rad of most rad jazz threadless.com or i'll create my own from screen print. If I go for a coat it's either my blue/orange/lime 70's leather moto jacket or a dyed jean jacket without sleeves. As for Hair style? Shaggy Black w/redviolet highlights Bed head all the way	„
—Cameljacked, on being a flaming queen [14]

[edit] Massive Ego

Cameljaculation is best known for his massive ego, which he doesn't even bother hiding, because he thinks everyone agrees on how great he is. While when normal people say things like "I don't try to be cute, I'm flat out adorable.", it can be taken as a joke, this TARTlet, however, has to be sure to make some mention of how many girls are desperate to get into his pants in every forum thread, despite the fact that he sits on the internets all day. When asked if he's actually scored with any of these "hot Azns" he says want a piece of his cock, he'll mumble something about being asexual. Yes camelejaculate, that's perfectly believable.

[edit] Cameljacker On Religion

Anyone who doesn't believe in the same thing as Cameljacker does, which is something he calls "Agnostic Catholicism", is wrong. If you ask him what these beliefs actually entail, however, he'll start calling you a bigoted retard because he doesn't actually know what "Agnostic Catholicism" means.

GARDEVOIR!! says (8:17 PM):
  I thought cameljacks decided he was agnostic
I'm Bald says (8:17 PM):
  hahah
Cameljacks says (8:17 PM):
  agnostic catholic=[
GARDEVOIR!! says (8:17 PM):
  wtf is an agnostic catholic
GARDEVOIR!! says (8:18 PM):
  you don't know if you're catholic?
Cameljacks says (8:18 PM):
  No jackass

This Just in! Cameljacker is now Agnostic but he believes in Jesus! He's said recently that he's a "non-practicing Christian" and a "theistic Agnostic". But let's be fair, Jesus is his Lord and Savior, he's just not sure what he died for or whose son the bastard is. And he follows all the holy laws but isn't sure the if the deity who mandates them exists or not. lol what? the conversation is here, below are the lulziest parts of the exchange, for a screencap see right.

• Cameljacker: Glad you took time away from sniffing lolly's ass to make another witless remark about Catholicism. I'm Agnostic, btw.
• dxd: So thats a step up from Agnostic Catholicism or whatever it was you were following before. Congrats.
• Cameljacker: I'm not a practising catholic, so I can't be described as one despite my beliefs. It's quite the misnomer. _{(lol Cameljacker have thesaurus)}
• dxd: Wow, you really know nothing about belief, or yours for that matter. Didn't Papa Jesus himself say that all you needed to do was to believe in and follow him?
• Cameljacker: I don't know anything about any beliefs, even my own? I wasn't aware you could make that judgment call from a few replies and nothing that supports that claim. ... My belief in Iesous is completely irrelevant to this conversation. I'm not a practicing catholic, so I can't very well be called a catholic despite a certain love for the holy sacraments and the such. However, a non practising Christian....would be correct, wouldn't it? On top of that I'm a theistic agnostic. Quite within the J man's love ratio, might I add.

[edit] Disturbing Pokemon Obsession

While some men like women and some men like men, Camelejaculation has a disturbing attraction to mudkips and other Pokemon. He is known to say things like "I love my Piplup...He is so cute, and blue" and go on about them for hundreds of posts, refusing to let the thread die, disturbing most and outright scaring some TARTlets right off the site. He likes his pokemon young, (refusing to let them evolve) so he can breed them in the game while wacking off, pretending he is actually having sex with bits of data on a screen. "I'm lolicon for pedomons" pretty much sums it up. He is known to browse the /d/ section of 4chan just in case someone posts up a thread of Pokemon fucking, and add it to his 10 gigabyte collection, which he vehemently denies owning except in private conversations:

Cameljacks says (7:33 PM):
  4chan has too many furries
Cameljacks says (7:33 PM):
  but sometimes there are threads of pokeporn
Cameljacks says (7:34 PM):
  I have a folder dedicated to the piplup variety
GARDEVOIR!! says (7:34 PM):
  What.

[edit] Camelejaculation and Terrorism

In his desperation to prove he's a schizo, Camelejaculation posted the name of his doctor on the devianTART forums. Anonymous tracked him down with the ultimate power of Google and discovered he's one of those terrorist towelheads. Cameljaculation's schizophrenia treatments are a cover for an Al Queda terrorist cell and he should be reported to George W. Bush as soon as possible.

[edit] NOT BUTTHURT

A note he sent to anonymous after his page was spammed:

“	1. Believe it or not ED is not the outlet of truth for the Internet. 2. Rehashing unfunny material one sentence at a time, comment by comment, doesn't make you clever nor hilarious. 3. If you want to try being funny, why not rent some books. 4. Surely you know how to read books. 5. Try that and stop acting like the average Alex Jones jacker [off-er] youtube user.	„
—Cameljack, Telling anonymous to rent some books

[edit] External Links

Camelejaculation on dA
His OTHER dA account BANNED!

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