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Cardcaptor Sakura

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finally Tomoyo's dream come true
finally Tomoyo's dream come true
The room of a typical Cardcaptor Sakura fan
The room of a typical Cardcaptor Sakura fan
Lee and Sakura. Ahh... true love
Lee and Sakura. Ahh... true love

Cardcaptor Sakura, formerly known as Cardcaptor Syaolong (more like "sho [is] long" amirite!!1??1), the story chronicled the story of Lee Showron, a little boy from China who whores his way over to Japan with games of strip poker. The title comes from the main character's habit of having each of the strapping young pedophiles who rapes his tight little eight-year-old ass sign one of the cards in his deck, so he can have a memento of his sodomy forever.

Surprisingly, this turned out to be too much for even the Japanese, who held rallies and protests, several of which turned into the Azn Riots of 1996. So the writers went back to the drawing board, trying to find some way to make the manga less controversial. In the end they ended up changing the main character to a girl, adding a voyeur dyke obsessed with the girl, putting Lee and his homoerotic sex with otherkin in the background and the manga instantly became a pop sensation.

Contents

[edit] The Characters

  • Sakura:Sakura is a 11 year old horny girl who loves to masturbate with her magical wand and use it to hurt that yellow creature Kero, while he cries and just say "stop dont be mean! waaah!" She first wanted to fuck with an older guy named Yukito,but then she realized that he was with the KKK and wanted to have inhuman buttsecks with a guy named Tori, so she instead wanted Lee Syaoran. Sakura's job is to gather all the tarot Clow card set to trade them for a huge dildo. She is always supper happy and all her friends think sunshine and kittens shoot out her ass.
  • Tomoyo:Sakura's obsessed fangirl BFF. Tomoyo creates all of Sakura's Lolita clothing and videotapes her, then posts the videos on Youtube. Imagine Misa from Death Note with twice the IQ and half her age, and that's pretty much her. She'd gladly fuck Sakura if given the chance.
  • Shaoran: Once gay for Yukito as well until the authoresses decided to make him straight for Sakura. See above.
  • Terada-Sensei and Rika: Who, boy. Can anyone say "Micheal Jackson"? This dumb fuck doesn't even try to hide his taste in lolis. And Rika likes this guy back!Suffice it to say after the end of the series, Terada will leave Rika for the next piece of eight-year-old ass he can find.
  • Eriol: OH SHIT WHAT A QUEER NAME. Seriously, Eriol...how much gayer does it get? It's almost not worth commenting on this character because the gayness of his name just speaks FOR him. About the only other think worth nothing is that fanfic writers love pairing up Tomoyo with this guy for some reason. Usually, fanfic revolve around Tomoyo wearing the strap-ons she fantasizes about using on Sakura and buttfucking Eriol.
  • Kero: The talking stuffed animal that follows Sakura around. Easily the only character worth a shit on this show, although somewhat negated by all the furry art surrounding him.

[edit] Shippers

As you can expect, legions of Shippers are at war, Sakura/Lee vs Sakura/Yukito vs Sakura/Tomoyo, a fierce battle is in process and many /b/tards are going to get hurt, emotionally and, in many cases, physically. Of course, the only real couple is Sakura & Lee since both declared their mutual feelings (and eventually Lee sodomized Sakura for fuck's sake--see above photo).

[edit] Fanart

It's all pedobait.

[edit] Gallery

Image:pikajewsprite.gif Cardcaptor Sakura is part of a series on Anime.

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