Cardcaptor Sakura
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Cardcaptor Sakura, formerly known as Cardcaptor Syaolong (more like "sho [is] long" amirite!!1??1), the story chronicled the story of Lee Showron, a little boy from China who whores his way over to Japan with games of strip poker. The title comes from the main character's habit of having each of the strapping young pedophiles who rapes his tight little eight-year-old ass sign one of the cards in his deck, so he can have a memento of his sodomy forever.
Surprisingly, this turned out to be too much for even the Japanese, who held rallies and protests, several of which turned into the Azn Riots of 1996. So the writers went back to the drawing board, trying to find some way to make the manga less controversial. In the end they ended up changing the main character to a girl, adding a voyeur dyke obsessed with the girl, putting Lee and his homoerotic sex with otherkin in the background and the manga instantly became a pop sensation.
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[edit] The Characters
- Sakura:Sakura is a 11 year old horny girl who loves to masturbate with her magical wand and use it to hurt that yellow creature Kero, while he cries and just say "stop dont be mean! waaah!" She first wanted to fuck with an older guy named Yukito,but then she realized that he was with the KKK and wanted to have inhuman buttsecks with a guy named Tori, so she instead wanted Lee Syaoran. Sakura's job is to gather all the
tarotClow card set to trade them for a huge dildo. She is always supper happy and all her friends think sunshine and kittens shoot out her ass.
- Tomoyo:Sakura's obsessed fangirl BFF. Tomoyo creates all of Sakura's Lolita clothing and videotapes her, then posts the videos on Youtube. Imagine Misa from Death Note with twice the IQ and half her age, and that's pretty much her. She'd gladly fuck Sakura if given the chance.
- Toya and Yukito: Sakura's older brother and his faggot boyfriend. Toya tried to cover up his gheyness by dating a woman that was over 9000 years older than him, but the lure of Yukito's pale, tiny cock proved to be too much. Sakura was Yukito's fag hag until she discovered a true man in Shaoran.
- Shaoran: Once gay for Yukito as well until the authoresses decided to make him straight for Sakura. See above.
- Meiling:Like Tomoyo in her love for her cousin Shaoran.
- Terada-Sensei and Rika: Who, boy. Can anyone say "Micheal Jackson"? This dumb fuck doesn't even try to hide his taste in lolis. And Rika likes this guy back!Suffice it to say after the end of the series, Terada will leave Rika for the next piece of eight-year-old ass he can find.
- Eriol: OH SHIT WHAT A QUEER NAME. Seriously, Eriol...how much gayer does it get? It's almost not worth commenting on this character because the gayness of his name just speaks FOR him. About the only other think worth nothing is that fanfic writers love pairing up Tomoyo with this guy for some reason. Usually, fanfic revolve around Tomoyo wearing the strap-ons she fantasizes about using on Sakura and buttfucking Eriol.
- Kero: The talking stuffed animal that follows Sakura around. Easily the only character worth a shit on this show, although somewhat negated by all the furry art surrounding him.
- Chiharu, Yamazaki, Fujitaka, Nadeshiko, Sonomi, Naoko, Yue, Kaho: Yeah, no one really cares about them.
[edit] Shippers
As you can expect, legions of Shippers are at war, Sakura/Lee vs Sakura/Yukito vs Sakura/Tomoyo, a fierce battle is in process and many /b/tards are going to get hurt, emotionally and, in many cases, physically. Of course, the only real couple is Sakura & Lee since both declared their mutual feelings (and eventually Lee sodomized Sakura for fuck's sake--see above photo).
[edit] Fanart
It's all pedobait.
[edit] Gallery
Pedobear you're gonna love this. |
| Cardcaptor Sakura is part of a series on Anime. |
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