Dave Chappelle
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
| WARNING! This article contains Niggers! |
Dave Chappelle is a an unfunny black Moslem who was once a tremendously lulzy nigger best remembered for his impersonation of '70's funk legend, Rick James, and his love of the Bolivian marching powder.
Any of us who have ever spent more than a minute around 15-year-old wards of the state who think listening to DMX makes them hard, who smear shit on the walls of their foster home to protest not being able to watch Ed, Edd, and Eddie, and who have appropriated black culture in a desperate plea to garner identity in a society that has set them adrift, know who Dave Chappelle is. Dave Chappelle is effectively the patron saint of 13 year old boys everywhere. While at some point he might've been funny, the fact that he is quoted ad naseum by his hordes of worshipful admirers makes anyone with an IQ above...whatever...want to pull a swift, merciful an hero.
Compounding this is Comedy Central's thirst for black cock and monies, since they still play his shit show in never-ending marathons, refusing to accept that he IRL deleted his Livejournal. This modern version of blaxploitation has been known to cause even the most ball-less, domesticated Liberal to join the Klan.
Last Thursday Chappelle became addicted to World of Warcraft and fell off the face of the earth (Srsly!).
The success of the Chappelle Show is responsible for the myriad ultra-funny spin-offs Comedy Central has spawned of it. You might have caught yourself secretly laughing like a retard to some or all of these:
- Carlos Mencia
- Chocolate News
- The Hebrew Hammer
- The Boondocks
- Anything not on BET that stars black people.
- D.L. Hughely, however the fuck you spell it
- All ethnic comedians everywhere that endlessly use "Have you notice that white people do this while (insert ethnicity here) people do that?"
- That "special" kid who kept yelling "WHAT? YEAAAAH!" over and over and over again for the 4 hours it took your shitty Chinatown bus to get from Manhattan to Baltimore.
Famous Quotes
- Put your goddamn cock away!
- Fuck your couch, nigga!
- I'm Rick James, bitch!
- Nigga what the fuck is juice?! I WANT GRAPE DRINK!
- SKEET SKEET SKEET
- Wacka, wacka!
- Good motherfucking choice, motherfucker! Samuel Jackson! Made painstakingly by me, Samuel L. Jackson! It'll get ya drunk! You'll be fucking fat girls in no time! You might even fight a nigga or two! Mmmm-mmm, bitch!
- I'm rich bitch!
- WHAT!?
- Okay.
- CHARLIE MURPHAYYYYYY!
- YEAAAAH!
- I...LOVE...LESBIANS, BYAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I watch The "L" Word on Showtime, BYAHHHHHHHH *Sniffs finger*....BYAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
- I like to sprinkle diamonds on everything I eat...it makes my dooky twinkle.
- I heard of trimmin' the hedges, but damn! You done scorched the Earth!
- Why don't you click your heels three times and go back to Africa! <--LOL, took his own advice!
- This coat is made out of 100% your mom's pubic hairs!
Images
See Also
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Dave Chappelle is part of a series of topics related to Black People. ☻ |
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