Linkin Park
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWLING IIIIIIIIN MY SKIIIIIIIIIIIN!!! THESE WOOOUNDS THEY WIIIIIILL NOT HEEEEEAL!!!
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Lincoln Park (often misspelled as Linkin Park) is a band that is known for having the most headache-inducing, screaming, angst-filled lyrics in history. This constant, pointless fake-rage makes them immensely popular with the current generation of depressed non-conforming spoiled teenagers living in the suburbs that think their lives are hard. They are known throughout the internets by being on nearly every Livejournal post (under "listening to"} and being the soundtrack to EVERY SINGLE AMV on JewTube. There is rumor that they were once a decent band, back when they weren't fucking capitalist pop stars.
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[edit] Lyrical Themes
Linkin Park specializes in good-ridden music such as regular life, being a person with good taste in music, hating self injury and bands that casue it like fall out boy, loss of ones iPod, being one step closer to the edge about to break and generally stuff. Every single word in every single Linking Park is a metaphor for hating emos and being anti-emo and a normal kid. It is also extremely common for the average Linkin Park song to contain the word "myself" over 9000 times. Lately, Linkin Park has also dubbed into even MOAR EMO! Much Lulz ensued.
[edit] Musical Attributes
Linkin Park basically decided to be trolls IRL by crossing the two most abysmally horrid types of music ever conceived: emo and hip hop. Their painfully formulaic music generally consists of a simple synth melody (sometimes being spiced up with a flute or something OMG), which then launches into one of the three sets of grungy, heavily-distorted powerchord or drop-B chord progressions that they use for every song. That same chord progression basically repeats through the song, accompanied by the poppin' fresh rap of Mike Shinoda and the wistfully dulcet prepubescent/ever-so-tormented screaming vocals of Chester Bennington. Also, their drummer is a Jew, and thoroughly enjoys Lemon Party. If you don't believe that they are emo, listen to "Bleed It Out", though be warned. After listening to it you'd wish you had a time machine so that you could go back in time and kill yourself before listening to "Bleed It Out" and consequently becoming emo.
[edit] WTF
Many people have wondered what all the screaming is all about. Many Linkin Park fans were then butthurt over the following video (which incidentally wins on virtually every level, parodying the emotards without descending into unfunny ranting):
An overjoyed fanboi's reaction to the video:
| —1PalPark, a bawwing weeaboo fag |
Note how this rimjob enthusiast cleverly employs whimsically creative spelling of a few words in hopes that his horrid grammar and spelling will seem intentional.
- NOTE* The creator of this video is a Linkin Park fan, though
This faggot just posted an overly emo video directed to all the "linkin park haters":
He really thinks that he pwnd LP haters with that masterpiece.It's true, check out the tags he used for his video: "Tags: linkin park numb haters owned palpark notemo rap rock." You can help be trolling the fuck out of him. Lol, did he just say we should go and LISTEN to Andy fucking Warhol and would prefer less raping?
An Heroism?
[edit] Minutes To Midnight Pre-Release
Before their new album "Minutes to Midnight" could be released, the whole album was leaked, and over nine thousand teenagers committed suicide, because of the intensive whining from Chester Bennington and the band's decision to throw a few f-bombs on the album to "be cool".
The band told everyone on the internetz that this album was going to be their movement towards "progressive rock". While this album was different because of their new producer Rick Rubin (moar like JEWbin, cos he IS a Jew...amirite? ), he used his money making formula to make Linkin Park even moar emo than they were originally, by simply not letting Mike Shinoda do his hip-hop thing because Rick thought he was still involved with Fort Minor. The lead single from the album, "What I've Done" was used for the ending of the Transformers movie, thus ruining the entire movie(also, the song was used in every single TF:the movie JEWTube video).
[edit] Linkin Park Fans
Linkin Park fans are of course the faggiest among faggotry. They are often just 13 year old boys or emo girls who live in the suburbs complaining about how their parents treat them unfairly and their life is horrible. And of course we all know having a horrible life ONLY MEANS that you have parents that don't constantly give you everything you want amirite?
| —A faggy 13 year old boy |
| —A Linkin Park fan |
[edit] See Also
[edit] External Links
- Linkin Park releases new song, thousands become an hero
- Linkin Park blatantly rip-off U2 with the third single from Minutes To Midnight, "Shadow of the Day"
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Linkin Park is part of a series on Music. |
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