Cocksucking Rampage
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
The cock-sucking rampage, or Rampageous Roostereus Vacumn , is a rampant phenomenon in today's inturwub whose roots are surprisingly ancient.
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[edit] The birth of the Cock-Sucking Rampage
Looking back through the mists of time, a sane man may only see one value that has held true and unmolested, only one principle that has not been corrupted- and that is the Cock-Sucking Rampage.
Throughout history, many important figures have embarked on brave cock-sucking rampages, only to return changed- for only precious few can stay strong while wading through tides of cock. The unworthy succumb to a phenomena known as "Cock-Shock".
While remaining, for the greater period of western civilization, firmly cemented in the mists of the past, Cocksucking Rampages enjoyed a breif resurgance in the "roaring" 1930's, just as classic animation tropes were being painstakingly copied and foully perverted by japanese scientists. As a result of this co-incidence, the Cock-sucking rampages of so many decades ago were recorded for time immemorial to see in the annals of cheezy japanese bullshit.
Thusly, the cock-sucking rampage and anime were to maintain a duality unseen since rednecks and NASCAR.
[edit] Cock-sucking rampages and Pokemon
During the latter days of the 20th century, oriental animators began to abandon the time-honored tradition of the cock-sucking rampage for infinitely deeper perversions. Thusly, Only 'Kiddy' anime shows such as Poke-yr-mom and You-Gay-Ho! incorporated the Cocksucking Rampage. As Pokemon was relegated to Occidental markets due to its increasing status as 'Cool' among japanese hipsters, You-Gay-Whore! Was the sole exporter of the Cocksucking Rampage. Eventually, the popular card-monster-battle show's board of directors buckled under pressure from the Board of Hipster Control, and phased out any Cocksucking whatsoever in preference to vore. This helped the show retain its 'Deck' status among asian hipsters of all nationalities for at least 100 years.
Thusly came the dark age of the cocksucking rampage. Only American markets, virgin to the wiles of hot rods being sucked off in droves, were attracted to the shock value of the Cocksucking Rampage. CEO of Pokemon international, Ching Chong Ding-a-Ling, probed American markets for interest in this tired old asian anime trope by sending nubile young USAzns into the streets of major U.S. cities randomly sucking off old black men. Leaders of caucasian suburb dwellers ages 12-28 expressed shock and outrage at not getting "a slice of the pie" and ordered for the cock-sucking rampages to continue. Ding-a-Ling swept down from his floating gold palace in the sky and assuaged the impotent rage of doped-up paint-huffing suburbanites all across america, and on July 23, 1997, a day that will go down in history as "Cocksucker's Ball", he brokered a treaty that allowed for a compromise- an animated TV show and trading card game where the main theme is mindless dicksuckery. Pocket monsters were gradually introduced to entice young children into accepting juvenile, teenage themes, and to of course sell more shit. Thus the great pokemon pandemic of 1998-2001 was born.
[edit] Famous Cocksuckers throughout history
- The queen of Russia
- Ash
- Cleopatra VII
- Misty
- Jigglypuff
- Doctor Phil
- Ann Coulter
- Dani Faulk
- Jameth
[edit] External Links
In a constant struggle to suck more cock than ever before!
