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Diablo 3

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Diablo 3 was announced last Thursday to the joy of many hardcore fans. There was excitement for all of two seconds before the lifeless[EDIT: play sacred or become an hero, but NEVER EVER COME BACK] nerds who still play Diablo 2 were annoyed by the new graphics and features. This led to lulz nothing, because Diablo is inferior just as bad as WoW. The basic concept of D3 is to get the common classer mixed up with aids and fail, leading at least to the following poor abominations:

The Master of Disease

Basically this is the Necro combined with some Druid elements and all the kind of diseases you can get by lurking 7chan and not4chan. These contain i.e.: -canceraids -teh herp -being a nigger -playing footy -actually getting a normal life

Playing this pitiful symbol of today's status quo of the internets won´t be easy for most of the nerds as most of them are infected by at least one of the mentioned plaques, making it a shame to play the Master of Disease.

The Jew

The Jew comes along with a new, unique concept: all of his skills are for looting. The Barb in D2 was also capable of getting the last juice outta the creeps, but his looting skills where left aside by most players because they are complete bullshit. This has not changed in D3, in fact the Jews only purpose is gathering money of the sold items and leeching the exp of his party members in case gold should get any kind economic value at the b.net servers.

The Negromancer

The Negromancer is a mixture of the good old fashioned Armymancer and a NIGGER. Summoning his NIGGER dudes hes gonna steal all the bikes. Health and mana are kinda mixed up with KFC wings and watermelon juice, what makes it difficult to get healed. For that purpose, you will have to beat up some white, kind grocery owners to get what you want. Lvl by lvl you will get better equipped homies, making you the horror even in hell. Featured by Grinman.

So far about the known classes.

[edit] The making of Diablo 3

Diablo 3 or WoW 2?  You decide.
Diablo 3 or WoW 2? You decide.
  1. Rip off Diablo 2
  2. Remove the satanic graphics so it looks like Warcraft III's in order to please casual gamers.
  3. Asking /b/ to give some advice how to make the game even better than D2.
  4. Getting totally assraped by the sheer horror of /b/ and never ever programming again.
  5. ????
  6. Profit!!



Image:Gamecontroller.gif Diablo 3 is part of a series on Gaming.

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