Angry Nintendo Nerd
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
The Angry Video Game Nerd is a basement dwelling ADD-ridden nerdraged balding faggot who creates YouTube videos where he 'reviews' bad video games and, now, films. Instead of actually reviewing the games like a professional slapstick author (video game reviewing is serious business), he just yells infantile cusswords (about at a 12-year-old's level) at his television screen. Most of them roughly consist of off key utterances from some shit-eating whacked out autistic chug, e.g. "What the fuck!" What the fuckin fuck!! What a piece of fuck!". At the end of his videos he usually says animals should perform sexual acts in his ear or just repeatedly talks about topics surrounding shit such as how he longs for the game to be over so he could milk a Bull's asshole (or his own) inside out, take a shit on a game, or simply talk about shit itself 'cuz nothing is funnier than a natural bodily function that occurs, right? Moarover, further research into his childhood suggests that he might've developed some kind of furry fetish. One could say that when you put all of this together, he is in fact a physical incarnation of /v/'s rage.
He also takes a swig of a beer bottle filed with water every three seconds in his videos to prove to people he's a man.
Angry Nintendo Nerd has officially changed his named to "Angry Video Game Nerd" so he wouldn't get sued by Nintendo for making shitty shirts with his catchphrases on them and associating "Nintendo" with some schizoid, liberal bullfuck phenomenon. It should be noted that regardless of this legal genius, he still has an IQ dwarfed by that of the average 4chan user's left testicle..
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[edit] Reviews
Although it is true that most of the games he reviews are complete and utter horse-shit, his reasons for hating them mainly boil down to him sucking capital ass at video games. It appears the Angry Nintendo Nerd (read: Fugly Famicom Faggot).
| —Official AVGN website, His fans don't get it, furries only! |
| —Angry Nintendo Nerd |
| —Angry Nintendo Nerd |
| —We get it, you'd rather fuck shit-covered animals while another animal with stomach problems empties it's bowels into your ear than play games. |
It seems to be funny to 99% of the world when someone adds 'fuck' at the end of a word and pretends to suck at video games similar to how the Tourette's Guy pretends to suck at life which is kind of ironic since both him and the ANN talk about having sex with animals.
For example, "Cockadooky Bullfuck." Now that was some major lulz, amirite? How about "shitload of fuck"? Not just a load of fuck, but a shitload of it! How does he come up with this stuff?
[edit] List of games the AVGN has reviewed
- Castlevania 2: Simon's Quest
- Dr. Jackle and Mr. Hyde
- The Karate Kid
- Who Framed Roger Rabbit
- [[Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
- Back To The Future
- mc kids
- Pedobear and The Yes! Gang
- Top Aeronautical Thetan Destruction Gun
- Master Chu and the drunkard fu
- Double Dragon III (Starring Bimmy and Jimmy Lee)
- Some retarded home video filmed by Bob Saget about the ANN when he was only 8 years old
- Friday, October the 13th, 1988
- A Nightmare on Elmo's Street
- The Power Glove (It's Baaaaaaaad!!)
- His rants about shitty sequels
- Rocky Balboa: The Video Game
- Christfag games
- Every single Ghostbusters game
- Every single Spiderman game
- Rise of the Silver Shit
- Dick Hard
- Home Alone With Pedophiles
- Free Homosexual Independence Day
- Bugs Bunny's Birthday Blowjob
- Nintendo Power, BITCH!!
- The Addams Family Jewels
- The Texas Chaindick Masturbation Massacre
- Hollowiener
- Dragon's Lair of Crackwhores
- Home Alone With Pedophiles 2: Raped in New York City
- Shaq Fu (The Worst SNES Game of all time)
- Boogie Orgie
- Far Cry Vagina
- Super Monkey Wet Balls
- His rants about the Zelda timeline.
- Ramboner
- Virtual Sex Boy Toy
- The Wizard of Oz (Complete with Cowardly Lion)
- Every piece of shit console ending in "vision".
- Every piece of shit NES Accessory
- Indiana Jones Trilogy
- 1% of all Star Trek games (But the movie comes out NEXT summer!)
[edit] List of games the AVGN will review
Given that the AVGN reviewed every game even partially connected to a theatrical release last year, it can be predicted that the following games will see reviews in the near future:
- CONFIRMED: Every Batman Game Ever Made (July 2008)
- Possibly: Every James Bond Game Ever Made (November 2008)
Moar like the Angry Licensed Video Game Based On A Movie Nerd, amirite?
[edit] Downtime
Somewhen beginning of April 2007, because the furfag retards TheGameBoys account got all their followers to mark all his videos as inappropriate, YouTube started removing the ANN's videos obviously because he sucks a snails ass at being lulzworthy and rather ends up lookin' like an extremely annoying ADD-ridden 12 year old who can't figure out how to work a fucking joystick.
[edit] Gametrailers
Because Viacum loves hearing the word "fuck" after everything that has a pulse, their puppet-state known as Gametrailers decided to exclusively host his reviews. If they wind up on YouTube, it's terrible, because then ScrewAttack is losing money that they could spend on pirating full-length movies on DailyMotion with their own shitty commentary. It's only stealing if you get caught, right?
It should be noted that the ANN quit his minimum-wage paying job at Wendy's to devote the rest of his days to ANN. He was quoted by employees as saying, "I'd rather have a buffalo shove a sabre laced with shit up my ass while I'm watching a Buffalo Sabres game than work this drive thru!"
Now ANN is a corporate tool who tries to be lulzy, but ends up being made of epic fail in the process.
[edit] War
When it was announced that the old arthritic bitch, (Sylvester Stallone,) was making a pile of shit epilogue to the Rambo series, which will likely be rated G, the AVGN joked that the title would possibly be "John Rambo". Well, the joke was up his ass and the title was in fact John Rambo. Fan Faggotry burst like a hymen under a needle and people started lulzing under the irony (even thought at the end of the video, he says that he's just fucking around, making the lulz vanish instantly).
AVGN got tired of people who loved him showing appreciation and in his Texas Chainsaw Massacre Video, he raeped the community by having his furry Guitar Hero mimic the people. This naturally felt like being penetrated through the ear by Batman, so a portion of the community left his bitch shackling nature and have taken up the cause of ED.
[edit] Mike Matei
However, it is believed that Matei is biding his time and waiting for the Emperor the Nerd to let his guard down so he may usurp him and take over his game reviewing empire.
[edit] AVGN Ripoffs
Just when things couldn't get any worse on teh tubes, The Angry Nintendo Nerd decided to raep the internets on one fine July afternoon exactly three months after An hero day (For the lulz?). The result of this raep was the first ever bastard child of the internets, rightly dubbed as "ANN ripoff #1". When this bastard child was able to grow a penis several weeks later, he then preceded to raep the internets in a fashion that would make a samurai become an hero.
As the internets got AIDS by all of the raeping of it by YouTube, the ANN ripoffs then decided to have incest and fuck each other to express their sexual lust for the bad games that they "review." Hence, the ANN ripoff population has grown to a level that's over 9000.
This devious process has gone unchecked by YouTube, as the admins are too busy stroking it to all those underage girls making out on webcams... that or they're all from West Virginia.
The AVGN Ripoffs have pissed off the internets. All hell has broken loose as the merchant from Resident Evil 4's power level goes over 9000 and takes his anger out on an 80s CD player:
[edit] Furious Famicom Faggot
Something Awful has been lulzless for quite a while (despite the claims of the Goons that the site is lulzier than ever... fucking liars, they are!). Despite this, they had their hands on a gold mine of lulz and drama that was yearning to be untapped.
The Furious Famicom Faggot, created by Shmorky, was to be a parody that would pwn the Angry Nintendo Nerd and all of those retreads that he inspired. Unfortunately, SA fucked it up and FFF became nothing moar than epic fail and a lulz flop that could have been so much moar. This is in part because the FFF was created as a parody on both the Angry Video Game Nerd and a lesser known fail called Gamelife. As an unnamed lulzosopher put it, "FFF is like the carrot cake of video game reviewers; it is decent when first eaten, but quickly becomes sickening and made of all things fail."
Fortunately, the internets saved itself from certain raeping by giving FFF the AIDS and fail before it became too lulzless for its own good. We can only drink to the lost potential of lulz and win...
A few weeks after the fail that was the Furious Famicom Faggot, Ebeeto emerged from the shadows as another parody of the YouTube video game reviewing movement, however, he is moar of a parody of that lulzless fuck UrinatingTree, instead of the AVGN.
[edit] PissedOffVideoGamer
This horrid creature is trying to be the Angry Nintendo Nerd, the difference is this fat fuck is way funnier in a completely different way. Just look at him, seriously, the video explains it all.
[edit] mpn1990
The angriest AVGN ripoff who reviews shitty unlicensed games. Action 52 almost killed this poor fellow, but somehow he managed to escape its merciless death grip.
[edit] The Irate Gamer
- Further information: Irate Gamer
[edit] The Mischief Makers Incident
In one AVGN video he is seen giving his angry look at a Mischief Makers cartridge. This caused rage on /v/ as they thought he had or was going to make a review video for Mischief Makers. It turned out that it was just filler footage for an intro and /v/ trolled themselves into thinking otherwise as the AVGN has not stated that he intends to review the game.
[edit] Suspension
As of May 19, 2008, YouTube has suspended his account. No reason was given, but that's probably for the best lulz-wise, as it means his fanbase will explode into a flurry of speculation and rage.
This is going to be as big a shitstorm as, if not larger than, the LittleKuriboh incident. Get your ringside seats and stage passes while you can. DISREGARD THAT I SUCK COCKS
[edit] AVGN nazis
The warzone that is the YouTube video gamer reviewers and their rivals has spawned many 12 year old jihadists who would otherwise be vandalizing ED,4chan or other mean people who make fun of their idols.
- Prisonbreak72020: Vandal and anticipated an hero. Feel free to leave him a message on his latest ED account user:TheWTFHero, or his new YouTube account MAXPAYNEPRODUCTIONS. Ironically is also a Irate Gamer Nazi. Probably not an epic double agent. Thinks hes black, even though the picture of his mug is shown at the top of his own article.
- greatexpectations320: Once a minor fanboy who evolved into the unholy avatar of the lulzkiller and meme smasher.
- Chickenhed61: A avgn house nigger and pedophilic furfag who enjoys masturbaiting to videos of kittens and 13-year old boys.
Of course dedicating yourself to defend 12 year old YouTube users with unfunny game reviews from these people makes you one with the AIDS.
[edit] See Also
[edit] External Links
- His YouTube page
- A Video of Him Reviewing Simon's Shitty Quest
- His website
- The Furious Famicom Faggot
- Ebeeto
- An example of retardation at its best
- Angry Video Game Nerd XD
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