Duke Nukem 3D
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Duke Nukem was released At least 100 years ago by the same fucktards who were responsible for the computer game Doom. The lulz here is that both games are nearly identical, using the same shit rendering engine. Said engine isn't even 3d per say, and so anybody who bought Duke Nukem 3D was in fact harshly ripped off. Thats like buying a friggin' Mod, and what kind of retard does that?
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[edit] What's the story?
The people who wrote this fine work of literary genius deserve a good firm hand shake, as it really is fucking great. Aliens invade earth for no reason, and steal local attractive women, which is the grounds of the games main character Duke, to shoot some guns and make predictable one-liners.
[edit] More like JEWke Nukem, amirite?
Duke Nukem's difference to Doom, is its small niche of fanboy 10 year olds, whom are convinced that Duke is rock cool, and knowledge of this fact will get them girlfriends. These deluded people are also convinced that the sequel Duke Nukem Forever is nearing completion, but it is a well known fact that this statement is a crock of shit, and said sequel was written off as vaporware at least 99 years ago.
Like Doom, Duke Nukem was very popular as A multiplayer game, with Geek and Nerds alike playing with one and other in Lan groups. Sadly it was and still is communal actions like these that prevent these folks from getting laid.
[edit] Where is it naow?
Duke Nukem 3d aged very badly, more so than the likes of its fellow contemporary Doom, when the 13 year olds grew up and realised that spouting phrases like Hail to the king and Come get some!, do in fact sound very silly in civilised company.
Plus everyone knows that by then, Quake was the place to be, virginity or not.
[edit] Other Dukes in resent history
The only other fellow to carry the handle of duke is John Wayne, but he was a pussy and decided to stay home instead of winning World War II, and so it becomes a fair argument that people who call themselves Dukes, or indeed any title relating to a feudal society for the good of their personal image, are cocks.
[edit] BALLS OF STEEL
BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL! BALLS OF STEEL!
[edit] External Links
The developers website, often updated as you can plainly tell.
