Egypt
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Egypt is the largest province of Saudi Arabia and one of the world's oldest, most idiotic cultures. At least 9000 years ago, it was a powerful empire ruled over by aliens and known for its magnificent, far-reaching civilization. By the third century B.C., it was known only for camel bestiality. Since then, Egypt has been pwned by the Greeks, the Persians, the Romans, Muhammad, the Ottoman Turks, the French, the English, the Israelis, Billoon45, ItsMargie and probably you.
In 1979 or thereabouts, Egypt became the first Arab state to sign a peace treaty with Israel when Jimmy Carter asked Prime Minister Sadat real polite-like to do so. Now the Egyptians have nothing to do. Shukran, rafiki, you need taxi? Change money? Bitrol? I can obtain for you this bitrol, okay, let's go.
Today Egypt is mostly known for its many bus crashes involving western tourists.
If you see an Egyptian, make sure you have a gun cuz they will wanna knife the shit out of you.
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Ancient Egypt
The Egyptians built many technological wonders, assisted by green aliens lead by Lord Xenu. They also invented furry buttsecks and perfected the art of mummification for the purpose of necrophilia. Their most lasting contribution to society, however, was the art of pwnage, especially the pwnage of Jews.
Famous Pharaohs
During ancient times, Egypt was not ruled by the Arabs but rather by Egyptians. Listed here are some of the most famous ones.
- Narmer, the founder of Egypt. Obviously the biggest furry of them all.
- Pepi II, famed for having 3pic buttsecks with his General repeatedly, which caused his death in the 96th year of his reign.
- Hatshepsut, the first known feminist, who's hobbies included pwning her stepson Thutmose III because he was MALE and crossdressing.
- Akhenaten, a man whose severe daddy issues and hatred of the normal Egyptian practice of worshiping furries led him to create a new religion centered on worshiping Aten, the sun disc. Unfortunately for Akhenaten the normal Egyptian population enjoyed jerking off to statues of Thoth too much to convert, and they pwned his monuments after his death. Akhenaten was also a family man who loved to have sex with his young female children. Unrelated, but still amusing, if his remaining monuments are anything to go by, he had an even bigger chin than Jay Leno.
- King Tut was made famous for having lots of cool stuff buried with him when he died. Other than that, his power lvl was basically 0.
- Ramses the Great's pastimes including counting his children and pwning the rest of the known world. Some people think he was the first one who had to deal with the Jews thinking that they had 1337 skillz that made them better than everyone else.
- Nectanebo II, the last native pharaoh of Egypt before Persia fucked his shit up. Also notable for being a creepy little fucker, some sources suggest he would whisper commands to people he killed, and tell them to do what he wanted in the underworld.
- Cleopatra was the last pharaoh of Egypt. She is known for molesting her little brother, then banging two famous Roman guys for power, and having a snake fetish. One day she accidentally an asp, and ended up being poisoned to death. Oops.
Pyramids
The Egyptians are perhaps most known for building the great and mighty pyramids, tombs in which the greatest of the Egyptian Pharaohs were laid to rest with a vast treasure of their personal belongings, most which were plundered and desecrated a few weeks after being sealed. As well, after the Egyptians stopped tending to the pyramids, they wound up crumbling to shit. The Nubians tried to build pyramids, but failed horribly. Today, the remaining wonders of the Ancient world have been conquered by tourists in Hawaiian shirts and Sand Niggers wanting to make a buck guiding them around on camels.
See Also
Egypt is part of a series on Islam 
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