George Carlin
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
| This old fuck was willing to die for the lulz... and did. |
George Carlin is was a leftard comedienne whose original and powerful insights about his country and about humanity made him a hero in the eyes of angsty 13-year-old boys, raging atheists, and decrepit old hippies. Being a raging atheist himself, he liked to troll his audience by asking God to "strike them dead." One of his most famous acts, "Seven Dirty Words," cemented itself in American popular culture as a classic because in the average vocabulary there are, in fact, seven dirty words--which is why ultimately all TV and radio fail, because we can't hear them.
Paradoxically; not at all in keeping with the rest of Carlin's retarded acts, his views on the environment are good for much lulz - on account that they would cause every piece of filth Commie in the audience to spontaneously combust.
George Carlin, a die-hard atheist, was smitten by the angry hand of God on June 22, 2008.
Note: Some argue that The Seven Dirty Words bit is frighteningly similar to a lot of Lenny Bruce's material in the mid-1960s (primarily due to the fact that they both used naughtynaughtynaughty words. And if you swear in your comedy routine you're automatically ripping off Lenny Bruce), when people thought Bruce in a bathrobe onstage was too batshit insane to tell jokes. After Bruce died, when suspected of borrowing someone's act, Carlin would say he was "carrying on the tradition" or "carrying the torch" which was his way of saying "Fuck him, finders keepers!". Carlin was the joke-stealing Carlos Mencia/Denis Leary/Dane Cook pioneer genius of his day, except that he was respectful enough to wait for the other motherfucker to die before ripping him off.
Life
Even though he was born and raised in West Philadelphia Jew York, he was actually Irish-American, which made all of his race commentary completely racist. He attended a Catholic school, but later became an outspoken atheist, after reaching the age of reason, which made him a lot moar edgy and cool. Despite his anger and cynicism towards society, he always considered himself a "personal optimist," i.e. a happy family man. However, his wife died rather early, making him an eligible bachelor. Since then he has put out 10 or more HBO specials and had more heart attacks than Cheney, and still couldn't become a more modern version of Lenny Bruce or Richard Pryor because, well, he did way too many HBO specials.
Concerned about the White Man
In seeming contradiction to most of his material regarding white people, when asked via a telephone interview how he felt about bad things happening around the world, he said he wished he could witness three indisputable facts often parroted by right-wing pundits, such as the rise of Russia and China, the Muslimization of Europe, and in his own words, "the decline of the white race." Note he said white race and not just white people, leading to the inescapable conclusion that George was telling whites to stop dancing like blacks because he realized it'd lead them to chucking spears and living in huts.
Death
On June 22nd 2008, after a long career filled with hookers and blow, Carlin died of a heart attack. Even on his deathbed, the old fuck was willing to give it all up in the name of lulz.
God Hates George Carlin
Evangelical fucktard Fred Phelps of Westboro Baptist Church shares his deep Biblical insight.
Ironically, this secretly faggot motherfucker is old as shit and will soon be joining George Carlin in hell, where George will spend all eternity making fun of Phelps and sodomizing his wife.
