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Hamlover
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Hamlover is a paranoid LJ user who frequently faps off to Klonoa and other younger furry characters. He's most likely paranoid because of the possibility of his mom finding him milking all over naked pictures of Klonoa, and he probably fears that his mom will try and take him to therapy. He really has nothing to worry in regards to that though as his family can't afford therapy since his mom uses food stamps.
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[edit] Hamlover's Greatest Pastime
One of Hamlover's favorite things to do is to have two Mario and Amy plushies buttsecks each other while fingering his anus and giggling like the total fucktard that he is. Once he reaches his full state of arousal, he stands five feet away from his sleeping brother and starts committing sin with his dick. His brother was not harmed during the incident, but Hamlover's sanity was further destroyed as he cleaned himself like a cat and then went to sleep cuddling a Tails plush. He ends his article by saying, "That was a good day." When his brother awoke that morning, he was able to smell sweat and shame.
[edit] Things Hamlover Gets Off To
Basically, if it covered in fur or is a plush, Hamlover is guaranteed to fap to it. This includes but is not limited to:
Hamlover sums up his own fucked up nature: "wtf I sneezed and suddenly my Lj is 4 years old and I'm an adult who jerks off to cute little animals... Oh, well, I'll get over it in therapy."
At least he admits he has a problem. We're one step to recovery. The final step, is of course, killing yourself.
[edit] Hamlover's Adventures
Hamlover spends much of his time arguing with people at MTA because his download limit went over 9000 gb. Hamlover was unable to continue downloading furry pr0n. Sadly, no one he told gave a fuck. Hamlover died five days later. He had no more adventures.
[edit] Related Links
hamlover's LiveJournal *Furfag's lj is Furriends only.
Categories: Furries | LJ Users | People
