Heaven's Gate
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
| Interesting Fact: This article contains an hero. |
Led by certified bicurious kook and attention whore Marshall Herff Applewhite, the Heaven's Gate cult were a California based, batshit crazy UFO 'religion'. They believed that they could ride on a Jesus powered spaceship that was hiding behind the comet Hale-Bopp if they drank Kool-Aid upon its arrival.
Sometime in the mid-90's, Herff and his cultists moved into a mansion in San Diego, where they practiced an ascetic lifestyle, denying themselves alcohol and sex. The cultists were known for their love of Star Trek, The X-Files, and computers. During this period, some cult members worked as website designers, leading some to suggest that the internets was related to their mass-heroism.
In April, 1997, Comet Hale-Bopp appeared and so the cult beamed up to the awaiting spaceship. 39 bodies were found dead in bunk beds, flat on their backs clad in black pants, black shirts, brand new black Nikes, and purple armbands reading "Heaven's Gate Away Team". Their faces were covered with purple cloths, a nod to the shrouds of Christian penance. Each member carried $5.00 in quarters for use on the spaceship which Jesus had kindly pimped out with an arcade and vending machines.
The cultists died by taking barbiturates mixed into pudding with a shot of vodka back. They sealed the deal by putting plastic bags over their heads and hitting themselves with bricks.
The Heaven's Gate cult were heeding the words of the Prophet Isaiah:
| —Isaiah |
Contents |
Just Do It!
Gallery
 What Applewhite thought the aliens looked like. |
 What the aliens really looked like. |
 Heaven's Gate Away Team patch. |
 im in ur spaceshps shaving my heads |
 Heaven's Gate's hero approves of their heroism. |
See Also
- Cult
- Jonestown
- Mulderite
- Waco
- http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0618965/ DR. LONDES = SAMEFAG AMIRITE?
External Links
| Heaven's Gate is part of a series on Cults. |
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Heaven's Gate is part of a series on An Hero. |
