Don Imus
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
In an age where black people are offended by racism to the point where they act like autistic children, it was only a matter of time until the negrosauruses would devour another victim in their intolerance-hating jaws. Enter crazy old coot Don Imus, the negro's latest cat toy and victim of a slow news day. Don Imus is a martyr in the race war against subhumans rising up against the white man.
Contents |
[edit] Root of Teh Controversy
On April 4th 07, radio-show host Don Imus accurately described a bunch of black female college basketball players 'nappy headed hoes'. Since black people are sensitive as fuck, national outrage broke loose from the black womens' fan-base. Even though the comment was hardly evil, loads of people managed to get angry and butthurt over it. Although the players were in fact nappy-headed - something ignored by everyone who objected - Imus attempted to defuse the situation by claiming that he made the statement as a joke. Regardless, both CBS and M$NBC to turn it into a prison rape by putting Imus on suspension for two weeks, only to ultimately permaban him from the airwaves before the suspension was up. Sources say this was because the negrosauruses were threatening to eat M$NBC's leader.
It should be noted that had there been something else going on in the world for the media to dogpile on, noone would have noticed Imus' ethnic slur ... and that Imus' producer Bernard McGuirks must be made of Teflon because he followed the 'slur' with his own 'observation'—that the Rutgers—Tennessee women's NCAA final was, "the Jiggaboos vs. the Wannabes"—without getting fired.
[edit] Apology and Further Shitstorming
On April 9th, Imus issued this public apology:
| —--Don Imus |
Being the kind, caring and understanding people that blacks are, they immediately accused him of being a liar, since black people have the power to read people's minds. Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson and Bruce Gordon (president of NAACP) also joined the negrosaurus terrorism organization, saying that Imus needs to get the fuck off, and starting a national campaign to drag everything he has from under his feet, because he made one good-natured but seemingly offensive comment. Remember, this was right after he apologized. Did we mention how kind and forgiving negroids are?
[edit] No really, GTFO
On April 11th, MSNBC cunt-punted Imus off their network, after further threats from the band of negrosauruses. To also get him kicked off radio (CBS), the negrosauruses have threatened to boycott every company that advertises with his radio show, because they're clearly insensitive racist fuckwads for advertising on his radio show. Every single one of Don's supporters has pulled out, since they didn't want any part of the drama-induced PMS fluid inflicted on Don's balls. As a result of this, CBS banned Don from their lair, because they're pussies who are afraid of controversy.
[edit] Imus' likeness is further abused
Because black people are such huge drama llamas, they figured they might as well use this shitstorm of stupidity to promote their 'blacks deserve to be treated better than everyone else' agenda. Half of America's population are negro-lovers, so their terrorist plot will most likely succeed. Attempts have been made to alert government officials of this ring of terrorism, but they're too busy fighting fictional enemies in make-believe countries.
[edit] Snoop Dogg Weighs In
| —Snoop Dogg |
Snoop Dogg could not be reached for a follow-up comment as he was too busy kicking the shit out of his wife before he snorted cocaine off a 16 year-old black girl's chest.
[edit] Mancow gives Imus the Cold Shoulder
| —Mancow, douchebag extraordinairre |
Word on the street is, he turned his back on O&A in the face of controversy as well, just like Curtis Sliwah did.
[edit] Previous Acts of Racism
This isn't the first time that Imus has been racist. In 1999, he viciously founded the Imus Ranch for Kids with Cancer, dedicated to giving sick children (a quarter of whom are black) a chance to experience a real, working cattle ranch. He was instrumental in raising money for the 'Intrepid Fallen Heroes Fund', which established a hospital to help wounded Iraq War veterans who have suffered traumatic war injuries. Imus also helped increase the death benefit given to families whose loved ones died in combat.
[edit] Imus Repeals His B&
As of Dec 3rd, Imus is back on the air. Several hundred balding Habbo users showed up in their underwear and wifebeaters to drunkenly welcome the waxy-faced redneck back to his show. No niggers were present to protest the event due to the fact that the return show benefit was being held next to a Popeyes.
Only a single person showed up to protest, a "freelance moralist" named Phillip Nobile. The cracker demanded that Imus apologize for his "lifetime of bigotry." The fans in attendance demanded that Nobile "squeal like a piggy" and proceeded to gangfuck him into the shape of a pretzel.
[edit] YouTubes
[edit] NAPPY HEADED HOS
[edit] Imus Apologizes
[edit] Al Sharpton Being Kind and Forgiving
[edit] GNAA SUPPORTS IMUS
[edit] Gallery
A Rutgers women's basketball player. |
Typical nappy headed hoe. |
Let's play some muthafuckin BASKETBALL, nigga! |
Rutgers' womens' basketball team captain, Ben Wallace |
[edit] See Also
- Opie and Anthony- Supported Imus despite being unfunny.
- Hal Turner - Famous white nationalist.
- Howard Stern - Jew faggot that supported Imus' firing.
- Sorry
- Black people
- Al Sharpton
- Pwnt By Capitalism
- Unemployed
- Victim complex
- Not Racist
- Malcolm X
- Martin Luther King
