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India

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“ 		 
Hello, this is Mike from Dell tech support, what can I help you with today?
  		„
 

—Traditional Indian Greeting

Typical Indian citizen
Typical Indian citizen
A very cool Indian citizen
A very cool Indian citizen
Image of the typical Indian worker.
Image of the typical Indian worker.

The subcontinent of India consists of Pagans, Shit and tele-marketers. It is found somewhere in South East Asia.

"THANK YOU, COME AGAIN!" is the national slogan for Indians.

AOL hires lots of people from India for phone support, due to their third eyes that can sense immediately if someone is calling to cancel so they can hang up on them before they can even ask.

Contents

[edit] Overview

Indians on a typical friday night drinking binge. Looks fun.


(Dots, not feathers.) India has long tradition of peace and non-violence and is still full of many spiritual gurus who are not actually Spiritual but make careers out of it by drugging out people gullible enough to fall for them into paying them money for practicing further Spiritual practices.

Then Indians got nukes. Now they think they can take out China. The up-coming bloodbath can be seen on pay-per-view. More information on this country is not needed as they are soon to be extinct anyway. India and Pakistan are mortal enemies, due to each claiming a streach of uninhabitable mountains in the name of national pride and Ego; so calling an Indian a Paki is akin to calling a Jew an Arab. It is therfore, an extremly good source of lulz.

Indians carry the plague and smell. Some also refer to these people as "curry/spiceniggers". They are also known to never use Deodrants. Indians also happen to have a sense of hate for the rest of the world which stems from their Jealousy when they compare their shitty country to better nations.

[edit] Who are the Indians (Asians niggers from India)???!?!

Your average Indian family.
Your average Indian family.
Typical Indian woman, dressed for a date.
Typical Indian woman, dressed for a date.
A little later.
A little later.
An Indian ventroliquist (left) and his puppet.
An Indian ventroliquist (left) and his puppet.

Indians are one of several selectable nation-based racial groupings in the Taydi Barian smash-hit MMORPG Life on Earth VI (which corresponds with the real truth about the Matrix, which does exist). They are considered an up-and-coming a smelly race and are in heavy economic competition failure with in comparison with the Chinese pplz, though the two nations retain generally friendly diplomatic relations. India contains 1.0 - 1.1 billion of Earth's 6 billion, while China has 1.2 - 1.3 billion. However, India is growing at a faster pace and will overtake China in raw population, which, undoubtedly will fucking suck for them, considering India is over 9000 times smaller than China in land area. Al Gore mentioned in his film, An Inconvenient Truth, that the possibility of that many Indians gathered in one small country might result in astronomic smells that could permeate into the atmosphere. That's good though, because I hope they die of their own curry stink.

[edit] Some facts about Indians

  • They smell like curry (a.k.a. shit)
  • 211% of all 7-11s are owned by Indians
  • Their cuisine/dishes are colorful and usually are filled with red colors and green colors to piss off colorblind people;
  • The pungent taste in Indian food, contrary to popular belief, is actually not from onions, but from sweat that had dripped off their armpits, despite this curry is Britain's national dish.
  • Indians are disgusting.
  • 247% of Indians are dirty, smelly, radical leftist bitches.
  • Indians can't write for shit. You can immediately tell when there's an Indian online because their English is fuck-horrible.
  • Indians are mostly immature, and think adding S's and Z's after every word makes them coolerz.
  • Indians are the trash of mankind.
  • Indians think Crappywood is cool.

[edit] Indian Inventions

  • Curry
  • Hypocrisy
  • Ugliness
  • The act of being self-centered
  • Smelliness
  • Ego
  • Betrayal
  • The double-cross
  • Pretentiousness
  • Jews
  • Sweaty Foreheads
  • Snake Charming

[edit] Economy

Bollywood.
Bollywood.
Indians, contrary to popular belief, actually do have employment. Whilst the stereotypical Indian lies out on the street worshipping cows and his/her/its god the business minded creature sits at a desk calling millions of people he/she/it has never even met before. These Indians are known as tele-marketers, also known as phone trolls. Tele-marketers have no real personal life and no real friends, seeing as every person they date happens to be a potential buyer of their products. What makes Indian telemarketers even more annoying is the way they pronounce English. The following is an example of a typical telemarketer calling an innocent, random person and the correct response one must use when dealing with these creatures.

Telemarketer: Herddo?

Victim: Hello

Telemarketer: Dhis iss (business name) vee believe you may be interested in vun of our produ-

Victim: SHUT THE FUCK UP AND SHOVE THIS PISSING PHONE UP YOUR ASS YOU DIRTY SON OF A BITCH! THEN GO SLIT YOUR OWN THROAT WITH THAT FUCKING STATUE WITH THE PERSON WITH THE THOUSAND FUCKING ARMS!!!! BY THE WAY I JUST SHOT A COW IN THE BACK OF THE HEAD, THEN PISSED ON IT'S CORPSE FOR THE LULZ!!!

-Hang Up-
Typical Indian Hang Up
Typical Indian Hang Up

As you can see, Indian telemarketers only understand swearing, abuse and violence. That is why they make good slaves.

Another typical job for Indian citizens is the production of bats for cricket. Rather than train and get better at playing the sport, in hope of one day rivalling Australia in skill, Indians prefer to suck up to the countries more developed, powerful and altogether better by making them bats. Of course, this theory is rubbish, nobody will ever trust Indians.

Also get most of their money with car insurance, by faking neck injuries when the cops come near the car smashed up like a chinamen was driving it.

The final stereotypical job for indians is technology support for electronics companies such as Microsoft. Instead of giving fully educated people employment they deserve, Microsoft have decided to give their jobs to low wage, unlearned and basically starving Indians who will "surely" know how to operate a PC when the whole country could not afford one without Live Aid.

For more details, see Indian.

[edit] Not to be confused with...

DO NOT WANT.
DO NOT WANT.

[edit] Not Azn

Indians are not Azns, though Indians are Asians (unless you're speak Amerifag English). India participates in the Asian games, and is considered a rising Asian superpower.

[edit] See also

[edit] Links

Indians say their women are the most beautiful in the world...FUG!

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