Jennifer Strange Memorial
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Contents |
[edit] In Memorium of Jennifer Strange
This webpage has been set up as a memorial to Jennifer Strange, who passed away on January 11th, 2007.
[edit] Background
Jennifer Strange, a trailer-park mother of three deformed, starving children, was killed by seemingly-friendly water the morning of Friday, January 11th. Known in the local community for her near-necrophiliac desire for sex scenes involving water sports and humiliation, she was unable to keep men in her life longer than it took to knock out another soon-to-be-malnourished child.
[edit] She Did it for the Wii
A desperate crackhead truly possessing a face for radio, she gave in to the selfish, increasingly shrill demands of her young, creeping half-nigger brood and entered a Sacramento-area radio station's contest in order to procure for them a Wii. In a stroke of sublime genius which can only be invented by the creative types at a morning show in a mid-sized, reeking-of-sewage-and-urine American city, the contest was entitled Hold Your Wee For A Wii.
The 20-individual contest was composed of the types of individuals you'd expect at what is, in its essence, a game of humiliation -- down and out types, BDSM submissives and aficionados craving for any sort of degradation such as Jennifer herself, and of course, uninspired attention whores. SubmissivesParticipants were expected to continually imbibe water while holding it in, until giving up or pissing themselves like horrid little homeless filth.
| —Elidia Campos, contestant and noted dumbshit |
Eager for degradation as they were, eventually contestants began dropping like flies, becoming pussies in the face of stomach distension and poor bladder control. Jennifer was one of two finalists, but failed in her quest to obtain the Wii for her blathering young. After returning home, she called in sick to work, and then fucking died, only to be found by her mother that afternoon.
There has been no word on the whereabouts of her ungrateful children during her final period of suffering.
[edit] The Aftermath
KDND, many days later, fired 10 employees involved in the "Morning Rave" show, and issued a disingenuous apology. Lolsuits are being prepared. Strange's valiant struggle against water has made her a martyr among Wii-crazed fantards and a prime example of why console fanboyism should be suppressed.
[edit] See Also
- Audio of the show in question
- Article decrying the callousness of doing it for the lulz IRL
- MySpace of Steve Maney, one of the fired DJs
Categories: People | Stub
