Jesari
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Jesari (A.K.A Jesse Jesse) is an aspiring young wizard, and poster boy for the Young Tubers United. Jesse and his Father, Andrew enjoy making videos for Youtube about the environment and how to prevent Greenhouse asses from destroying the O Zone. These videos are themed in order to get other kids to join in on the action and help make our world a better place. Thus far, many a cereal has been eaten, and many a mouth has been filmed - contributing to environmental stability.
The ongoing success of these videos, aswel as other contributions by Jesse have lead to him becoming a Youtube celebrity and gaining an ever growing fanbase. Along with his fanboi posse, Jesse often goes to many Youtube meet-ups and poses for photos with other Youtubers, these pictures are later compiled into a shitty slide show using Windows Movie Maker and uploaded to Jewtube
Contents |
[edit] Videos
[edit] The Present
On of Jesse's main hobbies is to make videos for pedophiles the Youtube community, as explained above, these videos are about the environment and how to save it... Other videos by the Youngtubes include the celebration of the great works of Dr. Matrin Luther King jr and national holidays e.g. St. Patricks Day.
These videos often average over 9000 views, at least 100 comments and several tissues... 37.4% of all comments on Jesari and Youngtubers videos are from pedo fanboi, Irish282 on how Awesome they look, and how he would liek to drill them. The remaining 62.6% of comments come from 16 year old girls who are asking for it and spambots advertising some pr0ns.
The format of the Jesari/YTU videos is rather simple:
1. Make 3 second film clip saying Hi,
2. Repeat x42,
3. Repeat again,
4. Add thank you slide,
5. ????
6. PROFIT!
The Example set by Jesse to his peers via these videos is one vital to saving the planet. Jesse and the rest of the Youngtubers are cereal about teh environment!, and have put a lot of effort into getting the word out to other kids about the environment and how we must save it.
Side effects of watching these videos may include:
[edit] The Early Days
Back in the days when Jesse didn't give a fuck about the environment, he enjoyed dressing up as a wizard and waving his wand around on camera, it was this type of video that gained Jesse and his younger brother ari great success in the world of e-popularity.
The sudden outburst of Jesari Fever was spreading through the tubes fast, this was expanded by YouTube Staff fearuring all of his videos, no matter how shit they all were... Jesse enjoyed this attention and promptly made many new friends in his new group - Ytask. Jesse and Ytask were all hailed as a great success and all involved were praised.
When the private group of children run by adults known as Ytask was exposed as a pedophile ring for grooming kids via youtube, Jesse immediately jumped ship and started the Youngtubers United, a private group of children run by adults... The YTU is currently being hailed as a great success and all involved are being praised.
Unaware that he was almost raped, and unaware that he is gonna get raped: Jesse still remains a promanent member of the YTU.
if embedding disabled: click here
[edit] Account Suspension
[edit] Reason for Suspension
At least 100 years ago the YouTube Staff finally came to their senses in realising that both the Jesari and YoungtubersUnited accounts were underage, hence in breach of the TOS, as well as being fap material for most Youtubers. They also came to the conclusion that all of his videos were awfully shit and promptly b& him for great justice... Many lulz ensued...
This pretty much sums up why he was suspended: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ue-T5JtT_Qs&feature=related
[edit] Reactions
Many butthurt fans got their knickers in a twist over the suspensions and TO THIS DATE! continue to protest. These protest videos usually consist of someone saying ”bring them back”, or “why were they suspended?” and writing poems about the accounts, of course the only people who watch these videos are newfags who BAWWW over the suspensions, despite the fact that there is a new account for the YTU/Jesari and they were b& because they were underage!
One enraged fan staged an IRL protest, where he made a fool of his fat arse and was laughed at by many passers by...
These protesters are so busy being butthurt that they fail to realize that Jesari put a 2 and a 13 on the end of his old usernames and made new accounts, despite these new accounts, people continue to protest for their return, yet it is still to no avail.
[edit] The Claude Chronicles
It are a fact! that Jesse’s best friend in the whole wide world is Claude Clark – a 47 year old, single, lonely, homosexual, boy loving pedophile... The two partake in many activites both OL and IRL.
When not engaged in conversation Claude likes to teach young Jesse how to deal with unwanted outsiders.
Here are Claudes top tips for kids on how to deal with unwanted trolls:
1. Block,
2. File false DMCA,
3. Make flying text video,
4. ????
5. Profit
[edit] Cameo Appearances
Using his acquired skills as a rent boy, Jesse is often delivered to a clients house to make an interesting and informative video about something very important. Jesse is paid in oral sex and slaves for his appearences in said videos.
Such videos have in the past raised awareness of the horrific, crippingly painful disease Lulpus - Jesari's efforts to raise awareness of Lulpus have in turn saved many dolphins' lives, and lowered oil prices around the world. This later contributed to world peace, which lead to us all becoming liberal hippy douches and getting pwnt by aliens.
The failed meme: Get into the Loop was spawned from a video about Lulpus featuring Jesse.
If embedding is disabled click HERE
[edit] Blossoming into a Woman!
Last Thursday it was noticed that young Jesse had started having her periods, you can help him by donating lady plugs to his youtube account. You can also help Jesse steer clear of any teenage angst by constantly reminding him that he has hit puberty and telling him that his body will be going through changes.
[edit] See Also
[edit] External Links
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