Jissouseki
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Jissouseki[実装石] (jiss-oo-SEK-kee), which means packaged retard, is a retarded Suiseiseki doll that was ordered by an Anonymous member of 2ch.
Contents |
[edit] Origin
One day one of 2ch's Anonymous ordered a doll, when he got the package meant to contain his precious doll he opened it. He was shocked to find out that the doll he had got was retarded and ugly beyond compare! Instead of throwing it away like any normal person would he decided to to fuck it in the ass. Afterwards he took pictures of it drenched in his cum and uploaded it onto 2chan. The Anonymous of 2ch rejoiced over this manifestation of evil, as it was the cutest thing that they had ever seen. Soon 2channers started worshiping this retarded doll and desired that it be given a proper name. Lo an behold the the Anonymous responsible for the thread, being the retard that he is said, "私はろばのそれを取ることを常に愛したあることが円滑油を覚えている." Which when translated into humanspeak means, "I shall name this beast similarly to that of it's origin." So the retard looked at the package that it came in and said that it shall be called Jissouseki because "Jissou" means package ad it looked an awful lot like Suiseiseki from Raspberry Gayden. Soon 2channer's started drawing thousands upon thousand of pictures of Jissouseki guro, scat, and other fucked up Fetishes.
- Other Names
Jissouseki goes by multiple names such as;
Because it can be used to troll the shit out of Desuchan's \desu\ board
- Jesu
jesu jesu jesu jesu jesu jesu jesu
Jesu is also a song by some guy named J.C. Bach that no one has ever heard of.
[edit] Gurochan
Due to the violent nature of Jissouseki pictures it was not long before the sick fucks of gurochan wanted to get it on the action. Jissouseki thread are often requested on gurochan and gurochanners will sometime even throw pics of their own, though they are much less exciting than those of the people in Moonland.
[edit] Desuchan
Although it is not done that often, posting Jissouseki on Desuchan makes for epic trolling, especially when people are actually on Desuchan. The fact that Desuchan has not flood margin makes it surprisingly easy to spam the /desu/ board with an untold amount of Jesu.
- The First Ever Jesu Trolling on Desuchan
Right after this epic combo the Baaw began to flow
 Desuchanners DO NOT WANT |
 GTFO JESU! |
 lolwut |
[edit] Paheal
It was not long until Jissouseki got the Rule 34 treatment. Smelling a large untapped amount of 34s, two of Paheal's members, Rule34d and wutmaster set off to harvest this enormous crop of Jissouseki love. Upon reaching the Jissouseki breeding ground lolwutmaster took a fair amount as not to cause the extinction of Jissouseki. However Rule34d, being the Jew that he is, took as many Jissousekis with him as Jewmanly possible. The two then proceeded to dump all 350+ pictures onto Paheal. Many Anonymous of Paheal complained about the brutal eye rape and tried to make false claims like that Jissouseki was in fact not_34, yet the two Pahealians trudged onward paying Anonymous no mind. The next challenge the pair faced were fellow namefags, who shouted hollow arguments about the difficulty Jissouseki was putting them through, some even became an hero. Then saviors arrived, saviors by the name of Som and Cat Bountry, who not only supported the mysterious ways of the Jissouseki but also contributed to the cause by quickly and skillfully drawing up some Jissouseki themselves. The flood went on for two days and two nights but eventually came to a stop. Many members of Paheal rejoiced at the sight of a receding water level, but the members who truly understood the ways of Jissouseki mourned the loss of new Jissouseki material. Even after the flood had ceased some members still tried to fight back, but were unsuccessful in their attempt and so even to this day you can stop by Paheal and pay tribute to the greatness that is, Jissouseki.
- Paheal Fanart
 By Cat Bountry |
 By LadyStardust |
 By LadyStardust |
 By som |
 By som |
 By wutmaster |
 By Rule34d |
 By Rule34d |
[edit] About Jissouseki
[edit] Habits
- Green Slime
Jissousekis shoot out a green slime (A.K.A Guacamole) whenever they are
- Scared
- In Pain
- Giving Birth
- Feeling Pleasure
- Cumming
- Any mixture of the above
This shit stains, so if a Jissouseki ever slimes you make sure you beat the living shit out of it.
- Homes
Even though they act like them, Jissousekis are not jews and they usually live
 In cardboard boxes |
- Bitching
Everyone knows that Jissousekis are NEVER happy and bitch constantly about their surrounds and want more shit from you than the jews want money. If they complain or ask you for things simply smack them on the head, after repeating this a couple times the Jesu will shit itself and stfu.
- Eating
Jissouseki loves eating EVERYTHING, they are one of the only things that will eat even more than your mom. These things include;
And basically any other thing that they can digest.
- Sex
- Jissouseki with vaginas:
These Jissousekis will suck any cock that they can find and usually like to take it in the ass/vagina, but if you intimidate them before raping the shit out of them than the whole time they will be BAWWWWWWWWing their asses out and spewing green stuff.
- Jissouseki with cocks:
These Jissouseki will fuck the day lights out of anything that they can squeeze their over sized niggercocks inside of. If they themselves get fucked in the butt then they will scream and thrash about wildly like the deranged little retards that they are. The top three things a Jissouseki likes are
- Sex
- Eating
- Shitting out babies
[edit] Pregnancy
When ever a Jissouseki drinks a liquid, eats other Jissouseki, or eats weird spiky berries, they are filled with a vile green substance. This substance hardens into what looks like a rupee from the Legend of Zelda. After a few minutes these rupees turn into Jissouseki larvae and are shot out of the Jissouseki's vagina along with a copious amount of green shit. After licking all of the goo off of their offspring, the larvae are ready to go wreck havoc upon the world. Some larvae grow to much in the womb and come out as Mini Jesus.
[edit] Life Cycle
In all stages of its life a Jissouseki can reproduce
- Stage One (Larvae)
- When Jissousekis are first shat out of their mother's vagina they are the size of a pea and have no legs whatsoever. You could even say that they resemble a fucking ugly slug. The wiggle around and often shoot their guacamole-like jizz/piss into their mouth and pleasure themselves with their tale-like structures.
- Stage Two (Mini Jesu)
- After shedding their skin Jissousekis resemble miniature retards. They now set off to rape, eat, suck, lick, or die in a gruesome manner.
- Stage Three (Jissouseki)
- After consuming enough food Mini Jesus grow into a normal Jissouseki. When at the Jissouseki stage they can now take care of their children and go out to collect food. They can also whore themselves out to VERY desperate people for cash.
- Stage Four (Mega Jesu or Fat Ass Jesu)
- After eating many f00dz Jissousekis grow uncontrollably into even more hideous fat asses. They now set off to eat anything the possible can and rape anything they possibly can.
- Stage Five (????)
- It's still a mystery
- Stage Six (Profit)
[edit] Gender
Despite the fact that Jissousekis often have dicks they are all female. This makes any Jissouseki with a dick the equivalent of a trap. The reasoning behind this is that all Jissouseki reproduce asexually and only grow dicks for pleasure or to rape the shit out of something. Jissouseki dicks are usually more than twice their size and width.
[edit] Gallery
| The Gallery of Jissouseki | ||||||
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