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John Howard
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
The Honourable John Howard is the former Prime Minister of Australia, a noted IRL troll who was eventually completely fired from Parliament for his faggotry. Mr. Howard is known for his small stature and stark resemblance to a Jim Henson muppet, an appearance befitting someone who spent most of his leadership years with George W. Bush's arm shoved up his arse.
After achieving power at least 100 years ago, Howard left many Aussies butthurt over his higher interest rates and other forms of responsible economic management. With breathtaking political savvy, Howard spent his eleven year reign sustaining economic growth, improving diplomatic ties with nearby Azns, and further securing Australia's future as America's 51st state. Long-time Howard bumbuddy Peter Costello was most likely succeed him as his party's leader, with Howard himself resigning to form the Australian Lemon Party. Costello also quit after his noble leader resigned. Oh noes who will lead the liberals, find out next next episode of "Pokemon: Master Quest!".
While undoubtedly noted John Howard had an outstanding Cocaine addiction. To the many lulz of 1969 and the society, certain "High Roller" big time drug dealers, celebrities, musicians, and artists found to there amusement that John Howard was a raging homosexual. John Howard has also been linked and charged with the Lulacaust.
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[edit] Mildly interesting information
Howard is a seasoned troll, using his power to undermine workers' rights and embarrass the union movement in Australia with his WorkChoices legislation. It is a little-known fact that did this not for the sake of the economy, but for the lulz.
Howard has an inability to lie convincingly, and for some reason, the Australian public become shocked and appalled every time he does it. You'd think people might smarten up and realise that politicians, like everyone else, actually lie. I mean, seriously, guys. Come on. How fucking hard is it to work out. For fuck's sake.
Hypersensitive chardonnay socialists take great umbrage to anything and everything Howard does, with such stunning political commentary as "OMG JOHN HOWARD IS A NAZI!!1" Which, y'know, isn't really true. Because Howard han't used his time in office to perpetrate the slaughter of millions of Jews. If he'd done that, he would probably be more popular.
Howard, as with any prominent world leader, is the focus of absolutely side-splitting political parody and satire. The most brilliant political minds work together to come up with such anti-Howard gems as "Howard is a coward". Most of Howard's detractors are misinformed pothead students with no political sense.
Howard, after losing the election and his seat in parliament, Howard immediately went to Bush and promptly sucked him for a few seconds and begged him to let him work as a maid for Bush. Bush then ejacualted in his face and sent him on. He did it for teh lulz
[edit] Bel-Air
Now this is a story all about how
My life got flipped turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute just sit down, playa
I'll tell you how I become the PM of a country called Straya
In Earlwood, Sydney born and raised
With the Liberals is where I spent most of my days
Chillin' out, maxin', relaxin', all cool
Playin' rugby and cricket representin' my school
When I ran in Bennelong to try to do some good
To represent the interests of my neighborhood
I won one little election and my mum got scared
And said, "You're movin' to Canberra to the Cabinet Chair"
I whistled for a cab and when it came near
The license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror
If anything I could say that this cab was silly
But I thought, "Nah, forget it. Yo home to Kirribilli!"
I pulled up to the lower house about 7 or 8
And I yelled to the cabby "yo holmes sack ya later"
Looked at my country I was finally there
To sit in my chair as the PM of Straya
[edit] Internets Revolution
[edit] Wikipedia Tampering
Mr Howard, knowing full well that he cannot win the next election, has resorted to desperate measures to win the next election including tampering with wikipedia to remove any damaging information. This resulted in Wikipedia locking his article so that only admins can edit it; if there is any justice in the world it will be have the fuck vandalised out of it.
[edit] YouTube
John Howard is on YouTube! SEE! He's not old and out of touch with the young folks! He's as "cool" and "hip" as the next "happening" young "dude"! "Radical!"
[edit] MySpace
Howard is Mr Popularity himself when it comes to social networking on the internets: he has a phenominal nine friends, including Tom. Truly revolutionary campaigning, we don't know how he does it.
[edit] 420chan
Yes Its True. Mr Howard is a pedo. He submits half the total of Cp Pics contained in 4chan. Note: R@ygold is John Howards Father and Brother.
[edit] Gallery
 Howard in parliamentary negotiations. |
 Mr. Howard ponders his imminent retirement. |
 Johnny is known for his prominent muppet eyebrows. |
 But we all know who Mr. Howard is really after. |
 These three old fucks are not to be confused with Lemon Party. |
 Howard bangin as a straight up G |
 DJ Howdizzle. He's gotta supplement that PM's wage somehow. |
 His hairline receded with his political integrity |
