Kevin Smith
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
He began his career with edgy, indie works like Clerks, Mallrats, and Chasing Amy, which were hailed as revolutionary and genius because they featured such universally appealing topics as marijuana, blasphemy, lesbians, and fucking dead people in convenience store restrooms, thus elevating Smith to demigod status among fangirls, scene kids, and stoners alike. This is the reason why you will find "Kevin Smith" listed as an interest in the LiveJournal of nearly everyone.
As per tradition, as soon as Smith gained critical acclaim and worldwide populatirty, he immediately sold out and lost all his talent. His more recent films are all indistinguishable slurg that feature Jennifer Lopez getting married then dying, and/or Ben Affleck performing auto-fellatio for 120 minutes. Old-school fans have been known to frantically begin sawing away at their wrists with their own teeth at the mere mention of Jersey Girl.
Fans continue to hold out hope for Smith's triumphant return from mediocrity and are advised to seek medication. As of late, people seem to think he's made a comeback by making a sequel to his only "good" movie (Mr. Smith Quits the Film Industry, 1999), titled Mr. Smith Gets a Lobotomy. But they're all perverted sickos.
Smith is often seen with Jason Mewes as Jay and Silent Bob. The pair were the most popular characters from the original Clerks movie and, as a result of this, Smith has included them in every single fucking movie since.
Smith is also incapable of making a decision- he claims to hate the Tim Burton Batman films and claims that Michael Keaton was a poor choice, yet ass-kisses both of them on the DVD bonuses. He insults Burton for minuscule "changes" to the source even though he was willing to bend over for the producer of a failed Superman movie and write a Superman that didn't fly and Doomsday riding a mechanical spider. Smith no doubt hits up Mewes' own drug stash periodically.
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[edit] Smith and Criticism
Clerks II offers yet more of Smith's original, witty humor, such as fast food clerks putting flies on the food of a customer they don't like! According to this report, it's only scratching the surface of Smith's wit [1]. Critic Joel Siegel walked out of the movie halfway through because it was a propagandistic scientology shit fest, and in response Kevin Smith confronted him about it on a radio show. Fans circle jerked each other over this confrontation because they believe Smith pwned ancient Joel Siegel. In reality, all he did was cry and whine. Siegel didn't realize he was actually talking to Smith because, with his low opinion of him, he never assumed that Smith would go so far as to moan at people who didn't like his shitty movie.
Yet Blunty3000 has always been a whiny fucking emo bitch about criticism of his films, even on the internets, which is serious fucking business. Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back for instance was an autobiographical movie of a time when Kevin Smith and his drug-laden boyfriend Jason Mewes went around America hunting down kids who called Clerks I crap on Rotten Tomatoes. Instead of satirizing his critics, Smith only ends up painting himself as even more of a loser.
Even though Kevin comes across as a huge homophobe, irl his brother is actually gay. Logically, they most likely share the "gay" gene, which may support why Smith continues to act and create super shitty movies.
[edit] Blunty3000 makes two videos pretending to troll himself
Blunty3000's going down - From Deviloftas - 15 February 2007
A weapon against Blunty. - From Deviloftas - 15 February 2007
A YouTube member corrected the audio pitch on the "Blunty3000's going down" video and proved that it was just Blunty3000, talking about himself, as usual.
Newworld101's response video to Deviloftas/Blunty3000.
deviloftas 48hrs - From Newworld101 - 16 February 2007
[edit] Other Resources
- UNCONFIRMED: According to Blunty3000/ Deviloftas +61 0416856101 is the number to ring if you want to talk to Blunty3000 (as opposed to using the internet for free, duh).
- Blunty3000's sad YouTube "playing with lego" channel
- Blunty3000's "Deviloftas" self-troll channel
- Blunty3000/Kevin Smith Productions website
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