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Role-playing

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To play a role-playing game, you have to fill out this application form.
To play a role-playing game, you have to fill out this application form.
To larp is to furry love.
To larp is to furry love.
A common Larper, Everan the Shadow Weaver.
A common Larper, Everan the Shadow Weaver.
Doug and Raymond are living it up.
Doug and Raymond are living it up.
What happens when you're paired with a n00b at a RPG.
What happens when you're paired with a n00b at a RPG.
Well, at least they're getting some exercise?.
Well, at least they're getting some exercise?.
Teh best summon card evar!
Teh best summon card evar!
Typical male internet role-play character.
Typical male internet role-play character.
Typical female internet role-play characters.
Typical female internet role-play characters.

Role-playing is the act of pretending to be something you're not. Common among geeks, gamers and furries. Also known as mass delusion.

Contents

[edit] Role-Playing Games

[edit] Internet Roleplaying

Many regard roleplaying to be a pastime whereby people who have too much time on their hands pretend to be other people (who are generally much cooler than they are) and interact "in character". The rest of humanity feels this form of imagination play should end in early childhood. Roleplaying was what some very strange ppl would do before there was World of Warcraft and Magic the Gathering.

About 0.05% of internet roleplay is written by intelligent and literate people with actual writing skillz, who create realistic characters with flaws and stuff and end up telling an interesting story together. The other 99.95% are retarded morons who can't spell and want to live out their fantasies with others of their kind to prove that they have a reason to live. This often happens on AOL.

Roleplay falls into two general categories: Dungeons & Dragons style roleplay with dice throws and things, and Freeform roleplay, in which you just say what your character does and wait for someone to react - this can occur in an original setting, but more often than not happens in a fandom, especially Harry Potter.

Godmoding involves deciding what your characters actions caused without the permission of the Moderator or other players upon whom your action impacts, and arbitrarily giving your character huge powerups that nobody else has. Saying what somebody elses character does is also referred to as bunnying. It goes without saying that the majority of internet roleplayers godmode like the End is nigh. But you probably don't care about any of that.

Freeform is where the most Godmoding happens, which is ironic because it is a term created in D&D, referring to a cheat code enabling one to pwn absolutely everyone - except of course other godmoders. In Freeform roleplay there is much more scope for Godmoding as you don't need to know any codes. Just claim that your character kills another one with his Super 1337 strength and flaming swords. See how easy that was?

Internet roleplay can be found on various forums, notably Neopets and Gaia, as well as Livejournal, Yahoo! and DevianTART Chat, where almost half of the chatrooms at any one time will be some sort of misspelling of "NarutoRP". Some roleplays are played by email and most contain useless acronyms and abbreviations like GM, DM, ST, PBEM, app, mod, OOC, IC, and mun.

[edit] How To Internet Role-Play

  • If male, enter wearing INCREDIBLY ghey attire such as skin tight jeans and a t-shirt with a giant flaming skull on the front and “Fuck You!” on the back. If female, enter wearing slutty clothing, like revealing tank tops and short skirts. Make sure your character’s name is stolen from a Tolkien novel of your choice, even if your character is, say, a cyborg and not an elf.
  • Attempt to flirt with characters of the opposite sex by smiling, winking, and asking stupid questions.
  • If male, pick fights with other male characters in order to appear tough and cool, or engage in White Knighting on behalf of some female attention whoring character. If female, constantly adjust your revealing undersized tank top because your huge, succulent breasts can barely fit.
  • Constantly troll other rpers for being n00bs, or for using pretentious Shakespearian language. When they point out that you yourself are using pretentious Shakespearian language, tell them that they’re just jealous of your 1337 rping skills.
  • ????
  • PROFIT!

[edit] Types Of Characters Internet Role-Players Play

  • Tall, attractive, skinny, huge-chested women that resemble Playboy bunnies with elf ears. These characters are played by morbidly obese, emo 16 year old girls on dozens of anti-psychotic medications – in other words, exactly the opposite of the characters they play.
  • Tall, dark, handsome hunks that resemble Brad Pitt on steroids. These characters are played by skinny, pasty, 13 year old male emotards that get beat up IRL – again, exactly the opposite of the characters they play.
  • Furries of all shapes, colors and sizes, most commonly cat-women and fox-women. These characters are played by furries, zoophiles, transsexuals, and 16 year old emo girls obsessed with anime.
  • Super bad-ass knights clad in black armor thicker than a black penis, covered in spikes and skulls and shit like that, carrying gigantic 1337 magical swords. These characters are played by angry 13 year old emo internet tough guys that will remain virgins well into their 40s or even until their final breath. These RPers will pick fights and flamewars over absolutely nothing, and are therefore the source of much lulz.
  • Tiny female winged fairies with comparatively huge chests. Basically, what you’d get if Pamela Anderson grew a pair of fairy wings and then got zapped by the ray gun from Honey, I Shrunk The Kids. These characters are played by teenage girls who crave 45 year old cock.
  • Pale, morbid vampires that sit in the back of the tavern and sulk and whine, waiting for someone to give them attention and sympathy. These characters are played by emos who look and act exactly like the characters they play (that is, whiny, pasty and partially decomposed), but lack their characters’ 1337 vampire superpowers.
  • Mages dressed in faggy attire and carrying 1337 magical staves and wands and other shit. These characters are played by computer programmers, geeks, and nerds who have never touched a woman IRL.
  • Characters stolen from ghey anime shows like Dragon Ball Z and Ruroni Kenshin. Troll these RPers for ripping off their characters from said anime shows and enjoy the lulz.

[edit] Things You Will See In Every RP Chat

  • Over 9000 characters attempting to cyber in the chat, drawing massive amounts of butthurt from other RPers who haven’t gotten any e-pussy that night.
  • Epic flamewars over the stupidest shit you can possibly imagine, or even nothing at all.
  • One male RPer attempting to e-rape a female character, and another male RPer White Knighting in hopes of getting some e-pussy later on.
  • Trolls setting fire to the room and randomly killing people.
  • 10 year old boys calling people names like “dildo face” and “ass brain”.
  • Male RPers threatening to kill one another IRL and claiming to be black belts in various martial arts and capable of benching over 250 pounds.
  • Valley Girls butchering the English language mercilessly and getting flamed by other RPers for exactly that.
  • Michael Jackson.

[edit] An Example Of A Typical Minute In An RP Chat 

***1337dave has joined Midnight Tavern***
1337dave: *walks in*
SauronTheMighty: ((1337dave, you're a n00b.  learn to rp or gtfo.))
LenaBoBena: *kisses Elladrin wit lots of tounge*
1337dave: ((stfu asshole!))
CrackaJacka69: *fels Lena up and kisse her bkac*
LilMissNawty: LENA AND CRACKAJACKA GET A ROOM!!!!!111
LenaBoBena: Shut the fuck up bitch!!!1!
CrackaJacka69: Stfu and gtfo Nawty, Lenas my gf!!
SauronTheMighty: ((or what?))
1337dave: ((I could kick your ass blindfolded with my hands tied behind my back.))
LilMissNawty: READ THE FUCKING RULES YOU CANT CYBER INT HE ROOM!!!!!!11!!!
LenaBoBena: Whateva bitch!  *Nawty is now on ignore* *rubs Elladin's coc thru his jeans*
1337dave: ((dude, you couldn't last all of two seconds in my town.  you fuckin pussy.))
LilMissNawty: YOU LITTLE BITCH ILL FUCKING BEAT YOU ASS!!!!!1
xxxxEmptyHeartxxxx: *cries softly in the back of the tavern, wishing somebody cared about me*
MegaMann5558: 17/m/oh ne1 wanna trade pix?  IM me plz!
SauronTheMighty: ((wanna fuckin bet you little bitch?  where do you live?))
CrackaJacka69: *starts fingerin Lena really fst and hard*
LilMissNawty: MEGA MAN THIS IS AN RP CHAT NOT A PORN SITE GTFO!!!!!1!
LenaBoBena: *lick Elladrins cock up n down slowly*
MegaMann5558: Nawty, chill da fuck out, k?  Dang ur a bitch!
1337Dave: ((sorry dude, I'm not gay like you.))
***BDBDBDBDBD has entered Midnight Tavern***
BDBDBDBDBD: poop fcae shit eaterr fuck hed
CrackaJacka69: *slide the rest of my dick into Lena's moth*
SauronTheMighty: ((no seriously, where do you live?  I'll drop by and kick your sorry ass right now.))
LilMissNawty: BDBD GTFO TROLL!!!!!!111!!!
BDBDBDBDBD: ass fuckk bich but dick ass
MegaMann5558: 17/m/oh ne1 wanna trade pix?  IM me plz!
LenaBoBena: *stradles Elladrin and feels his dick slid into my pussy*
BDBDBDBDBD: cunt hore ass bich basterd
1337dave: ((pshh.  you couldn't even win against an 8 year old girl.))
Dying_Whispers: *tentatively looks at [xxxxEmptyHeartxxxx] with tears in her eyes*
CrackaJacka69: *moves his dick in and out of Lnea faster and faster*
BDBDBDBDBD: penis vagina dick hore ass
LilMissNawty: THIS CHAT SUCKS ITS NOT EVEN AN RP CHAT!!!  BYE ASSHOLES!!!!!1
***LilMissNawty has left Midnight Tavern***
BDBDBDBDBD: fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck 
LenaBoBena: *moans as Elladrin's cock fill up her pusys and rides him hrd and fast*
BDBDBDBDBD: fuck fuck fuck
LenaBoBena: ((yay, the bitch is gone!))
SauronTheMighty:  ((where do you live you pussy?  I'll fight you for real!))
1337dave: ((wtf is your problem anyway?))
CrackaJacka69: ((finally))
xxxxEmptyHeartxxxx: *looks back at [Dying_Whispers] with tears in her eyes too, feeling the calling of a kindred spirit*
***AidynTheStrong has entered Midnight Tavern***
AidynTheStrong: *walks in*
SauronTheMighty: ((Aidyn, you're a n00b.  learn to rp or gtfo.))

[edit] Live-Action Role-Playing (LARP)

Rather than keeping their shameful role-playing a dark secret in their parents' basement, LARPers dress up and pretend to be their characters, occasionally in public venues. Often this results in much hilarity or to the dismay of shocked onlookers. Roughly 75% of LARPers are Goths pretending to be vampires. Sub-categories of the Goths include fat chicks, skinny ugly chicks with glasses, and gay males who like to tell everyone they're really bi. Another 24% thwack each other with foam swords and throw bean-bags at each other until they have to take some form of kneeling position and continue to fight on (bravely?). The remaining 1% are furries who bring shame on humanity as they transition from ppl to BDSM slaves. If you are a furry, take heed of the lesson of Munchie and Rain - always buy a return ticket. Also, 89% of statistics are made up on the spot.

Any of the role-playing games listed above can be turned into a LARP. For example, you can LARP cybersex to make it IRL sex, but if you are a LARPer that probably isn't happening.

Still, at least they're not playing Runescape.


For more information on the dangers of LARP, watch "Mazes and Monsters" with Tom Hanks, or:

Lightning Bolt!



This is what happens when LARPers get access to money and cameras:

[edit] LARP Gallery

All LARPers = otherkin

This guy is hardcore

you encounter the NAMBLA Larping society

Well, I guess there's one two good reasons to LARP.

[edit] See Also

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