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John Locke

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FACT ALERT:
John Locke will fuck up your shit.



The man himself.
The man himself.

John Locke is a character from the unpopular television drama Lost. In the show, this lovable skinhead often fucks everything up for the castaways/fucktards. Why? Because he's Locke. If you get in his way, he's going to fuck up your shit. He is so fucking awesome, he's named after a philosopher from the Age of Enlightenment who influenced the Founding Fathers.

Locke eventually found his way onto 4chan and continues to fuck up everyone's shit. It's all part of the lulziest meme to show up on /b/ for a long time.

History

Locke was once an orphan born from a teenmommy, basement dweller, and cripple. During the attention whore emo CP lover phase of his life, he donated a kidney to his dying dad, who kicked him to the curb before the doctors were done stitching him up. Pissed off, Locke started fucking shit up. He forced an airplane crash with nothing more than the power of his mind. His crippled legs? He fucked them up so badly that he could walk again. Every season finale of Lost asks the questions "Who will Locke kill next?" He most recently managed to kill himself, what a fucking badass an hero, then became a zombie, proving he is Jesus Ben did actually successfully kill Locke and the "new" Locke is actually someone else in John Locke's form. It is, however, inevitable that Locke will return to fucking up everyone's shit.

On the 4th of November, Locke became the president of the internets. This day will be remembered.

Bridge collapse? Miner cave-ins? ED:IRC? Locke fucked up their shit.

Locke will fuck up your shit. This cannot be avoided.

John Locke killed Bruce Lee and framed Hitler for suicide brain hemorrhage.

Gallery:

John Locke Gallery

In Conclusion

John Locke will kill you.
This cannot be avoided.

See Also:


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John Locke is part of a series on TV & Movies




John Locke is part of Classic Solid Chanspeak
          a series on Memes Fleeting Failed Not a Meme
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Time-Tested
Classics
A Cat Is Fine TooAll Your Base Are Belong To UsA Master Is OutA winner is youAn HeroBaby fuckBarrel rollBayeux TapestryBel-AirBitches Don't KnowBix NoodBrian PeppersBridgetBuy A DogCandlejackCatnarokCaturdayCeiling CatCentipede filled vaginaChuck NorrisCockmonglerCopypastaCreepypastaDelicious CakeDemotivatorsDesuDiabeetusDivide By ZeroDO IT FAGGOTDO NOT WANTDuckrollEpic Fail GuyEpic ThreadsFGSFDSGaijin 4KomaGeorge ZimmerGoodnight Sweet PrinceHA! HA! GuyHAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKSHappycatHappy NegroHow Do I Shot Web?I Am In Your Base Killing Your D00dsI CameI Has A ShuvelIMMA CHARGIN MAH LAZERINTERNET HATE MACHINEI See What You Did ThereOh god how did this get here I am not good with computerOver 9000ITTY BITTY BABY ITTY BITTY BOATJESUS CHRIST IT'S A LION GET IN THE CAR!LOL WUTLongcatMilhouse is not a memeMoarMudkipsNigga stole my bikeOh exploitableO RLYPedobearPool's ClosedProfitRaptor JesusReaction GuyRickrollThe Sandwich ChefSean ConneryThe Singing SharkThis Looks ShoppedWRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYOU ARE DOING IT WRONGZippocatZA WARUDO????/Profit
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Jargon and
Textual Memes
Bring Back SnacksBut who was xBumpBut Data does not weightCombofagCool story broDrawhoreFixedFukken savedGrey AreaHA HA HA, OH WOWI don't think you have an X. Enjoy your Y.in before XI resurrected this pearl from page 10LURK MOARNever forgetNewfags can't XNO UNobody CaresPic RelatedPic UnrelatedPosting in an epic threadRelevant to my interestsRules Of The InternetSauceStick It In Her PooperStop postingVerbose Threadwat doWeeabooWHARRGARBLWhere is your X now?X is not your personal armyX Y is XYour a fucking idiot
15 Minutes
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360 kid4chan Battlecards4chan Gaming4chan Gold AccountApproval GuyAudioBeat A RodBecause of Parkinson'sBirdmanBoxxyChild AbductionBRB, CHURCHbrb, compromisedbrb, soupBrinks Home SecurityChin-chanClippitCoolfaceDental PlanDick NeckDynamic EntryExtreme AdvertisingFeels good manFishing CatFlea Market Montgomery#fortuneGary OakGee BillGodhand EditGoofy TimeGrin ReaperGuess The MemeHal WilkersonHi-tech military softwareHoly GrailHOW CAN SHE SLAP?!?I DIDN'T EAT THAT FUCKIN SANDWICH OR THE TOILET THING EITHER!I Has A BucketI need a price check ...I TOUCHED HIS PENIS!! OMGJosef FritzlJxcelDolghmQTime for a DickingChocolate RainLarge Hadron ColliderLeave Bond to meLINK MAH BOIIIIILOLCHAIRMavica SpriteMichael PhelpsMordorNevada-tanNod FlendersOctocatOh No You Didn'tOperation Falcon PunchOperation LIONCASHPerfection GirlPic Related PuppyPokepunsPower WristRAGEROW ROW FIGHT THE POWAHSFW PornShamwowSteve IrwinStingraySUP DAWGSwirl FaceSwitch police onTapestry DogTyrannosaurus ReichUninformed LisaVTEC Just Kicked In YoWhat is a man?Why So Exploitable?Woll SmothZach Braff Quotes
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But No Cigar
27Advice DogApples BearAsianfaceBig DogBillBird is the wordCAPS EAGLECOMBO BREAKERCool your jetsDancing OwenDick ButtDrama Prairie DogFUCK YEAH SEAKINGFurseisekiThe FuryGastonGETGet into the LoopGirugameshHai guyI AM BEOWULF!I don't roll that wayJack SpicerL-L-LUNAJACK!Living On A PrayerNavidNyoro~nObjection!oh shit i'm sorry i meantPost ending in 75 GirlRedtube RouletteRitaSHIT IT OFFShortcatSkittle NiggerStaredogSo cashTAP LADEDANS FISTON!THE BESTUNITINUWHEN I WASYou Laugh, You LoseYOU'RE A BIRD!
No.

Milhouse

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