Longcat

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A looong cat is fine too.
A looong cat is fine too.
Another pic of Shiroi (Longcat). Isn't she adorable?
Another pic of Shiroi (Longcat). Isn't she adorable?
This article needs moar long.
You can help by adding moar long.

One day, there was a picture of a cat. It was not Caturday but this specific cat was so long it became a meme and, though the day was not specifically the day of cats, this cat's length became famous. Originating from 2chan, it is a sacred meme that embodies the spirit of the lulz. It has touched the hearts of every anon and /b/tard in the internets. All attempts made by faggots who desire to steal it from anon have earned the swift, unmerciful wrath of the Internet Hate Machine.

Longcat is a real cat (obviously). For some reason when Longcat's uninspired owners named him, they must have overlooked the extremely fucking huge length of the kitten, and they named him after his second most defining feature. Therefore Longcat's real name is Shiroi (白い), which means "white" in Japanese.

Contents

[edit] The legend

Behold, the end of all that we know and love. The Marcab Confederacy's Deathstar Longcat.
Behold, the end of all that we know and love. The Marcab Confederacy's Deathstar Longcat.
Longcat did WTC
Longcat did WTC

Noone knows how long Longcat actually is. The figure above gives an estimated length of 10,000 ft, however this number has been verified by science. The most successful space mission to measure Longcat had to turn back and recharge their lasers after just over 9000 feet in the air.

[edit] The prophecy

It has been prophesied that during Catnarok Longcat will do epic battle with Tacgnol for the fate of the universe.
It has been prophesied that during Catnarok Longcat will do epic battle with Tacgnol for the fate of the universe.

It is said that Longcat is part of a foursome of powerful cats that, when brought together, shall restore peace and harmony throughout the land.

 
“ 		 
There shall be Four. One of Air, his fur white as snow. His power shall enlighten the masses, and herald the beginning. The second of Earth, black as the night. The darkness will be overwhelming, but do not fear! He has come as a harbinger of the goodness to come. The thrice appearance of a creature of great length, this one coloured as though wrapped in the very flame it represents, will appear to assuade our fears of the nigh end.Though it will be met with hate and loathing, it shall soldier on to aid us. The final, the fourth, shall emerge from the great oceans as though it was born of them, joining it's brothers and spreading harmony as it walks.

Together, the Four Felines will combine their great power, and summon a fifth, a creature of pure heart, radiant and beautiful. He, mighty and virile, will open the soul of all followers, and lead them to the land of ultimate delight. Never again will people have to buy dogs or get in their cars! No more will innocent yellow vans tremble at the approaching horde! The fruit of our reptilian labors will come, and feline power shall rule to cosmos!
 

„
 

—Raptor Jesus

tl;dr

[edit] OP?

A little known fact is that Longcat was not first sighted on /b/. At least 100 years ago, a different Longcat made its debut on Monty Python's Flying Circus as the counter to the rise of Killer Cars. Notice how this unidentified Legendary Cat literally inhales a skyscraper. Truly, a testament to the awesome power of the Legendary Cats.

This cat seemingly incorporates both white and black patterns on it. Could perhaps this be a distant relative of the Legendary Cats? Its power and length is undeniable; yet it is debatable whether or not this cat was related to Longcat or Tacgnol as it died at the end of the short thanks to the Master Hand. However, this could simply be explained away with Hollywood Magic.

[edit] The Longcat family

Shortcat

Tacgnol

Tactrohs

Longgnol, result of Catnarok

Longhorse

Longkip

Widedog

Long'kat

Olngact, Longcat's orange counterpart and one of the four cats prophesied by Raptor Jesus

Longcat, OH EXPLOITABLE!

A longdog is fine too.

Extra Long Coney is Extra Long - can Longcat defeat him?

[edit] Moar family?!

The Longcat remix
The Longcat remix

Shortcat is closely related to Longcat, but what of his other family members? Recently a DNA test confirmed that Longcat is blood-related to the bastardized Shatcat.

[edit] Longcat's Song

[edit] Longcat facts

  • Many new users speculate that Longcat cat is not lengthy, but it is in fact long.
  • Longcat and Speedycat are not just dating but have actually had an offspring named Splongcat.
  • Longcat is the longest substance known to man.

[edit] ASCII Longcat

For your flooding pleasure, ascii Longcat's length has been increased to 2,142 lines, which is the maximum length most IRC clients will allow given the number of characters involved. 

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   |Longcat|
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   /        \
  /   ____   \
  |  /    \  |
  | |      | |
 /  |      |  \
 \__/      \__/

[edit] Longcat is looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong

[edit] YouTuber confused about the care of Longcats (Tacgnols in this case)

[edit] Gallery

Longallery is looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong

Even Halloween is not safe

Longcat be of great length!

Epic Longcat on Freerepublic.com

Longcat is your god

All Cats R saying: "IMMA FIRIN MAH LAZER!"

EARTH!

FIRE!

WIND!

WATER!

HEART! By your powers combined, I am...

CAPTAIN LONGCAT!

Longcat merges its powers!

God help us...

A challenger appears!

Rule 34

The Ancient Temple of Longcat

This will happen to you if you watch too much Furry porn

Some argue that there are longer cats; these people are failures who cannot comprehend that the length of Longcat is the 12th dimension.

And on the third day, Longcat will arise from the dead -- AGAIN!

The Conspiracy is broken

You SHALL...NOT...PASS!

Longcat Stencil for all your tagging purposes

Longcat stencil that wasn't just run through the Livetrace filter

Edcat is LOL

i think he liiiiiiiiiieks you too

Longbot is looooooong

A human challenger appears

He still looks wonderful to me

Rare artists' rendering of Longcat's parents

Longcat: Japan version.

Epic Longcat on /b/

New Animu SpeedyLongCat

Badgecat...DO WANT

all done on paint, took fucking hours but the result shows what you can achieve with hard work.

Longcat did 9/11

[edit] See also

[edit] External Links


Longcat is part of Classic Solid Chanspeak
          a series on Memes Fleeting Failed Not a Meme
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15 Minutes
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