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Longcat

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

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Another pic of Shiroi (Longcat). Isn't she adorable?
Another pic of Shiroi (Longcat). Isn't she adorable?
This article needs moar long.
You can help by adding moar long.

One day, there was a picture of a cat. It was not Caturday but this specific cat was so long it became a meme and, though the day was not specifically the day of cats, this cat's length became famous. Originating from 2chan, it is a sacred meme that embodies the spirit of the lulz, as it has touched the hearts of every anon and /b/tard in the internets. All attempts made by faggots who desire to steal it from anon have earned the swift, unmerciful wrath of the Internet Hate Machine.

Longcat is a real cat (obviously). For some reason when Longcat's uninspired owners named him, they must have overlooked the extremely fucking huge length of the kitten, and they named him after his second most defining feature. Therefore Longcat's real name is Shiroi (白い), which means "white" in Japanese. This may, however, be an azn mind game to confuse black people who believe they are the longest members of the human species.

Contents

The legend

Behold, the end of all that we know and love. The Marcab Confederacy's Deathstar Longcat.
Behold, the end of all that we know and love. The Marcab Confederacy's Deathstar Longcat.
Longcat did WTC
Longcat did WTC

Noone knows how long Longcat actually is. The figure above gives an estimated length of 10,000 ft, however this number has been verified by science. The most successful space mission to measure Longcat had to turn back and recharge their lasers after just 9000 feet and one inch in the air.

Possible origin

There is a quote by Einstein that may have been the source of inspiration for this meme:

 
 
You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat.
 

 

Albert Einstein

The prophecy

It has been prophesied that during Catnarok Longcat will do epic battle with Tacgnol for the fate of the universe.
It has been prophesied that during Catnarok Longcat will do epic battle with Tacgnol for the fate of the universe.

It is said that Longcat is part of a foursome of powerful cats that, when brought together, shall restore peace and harmony throughout the land.

 
 
There shall be Four. One of Air, his fur white as snow. His power shall enlighten the masses, and herald the beginning. The second of Earth, black as the night. The darkness will be overwhelming, but do not fear! He has come as a harbinger of the goodness to come. The thrice appearance of a creature of great length, this one coloured as though wrapped in the very flame it represents, will appear to assuade our fears of the nigh end.Though it will be met with hate and loathing, it shall soldier on to aid us. The final, the fourth, shall emerge from the great oceans as though it was born of them, joining it's brothers and spreading harmony as it walks.

Together, the Four Felines will combine their great power, and summon a fifth, a creature of pure heart, radiant and beautiful. He, mighty and virile, will open the soul of all followers, and lead them to the land of ultimate delight. Never again will people have to buy dogs or get in their cars! No more will innocent yellow vans tremble at the approaching horde! The fruit of our reptilian labors will come, and feline power shall rule to cosmos!
 


 

Raptor Jesus

tl;dr

The Longcat family

Moar family?!

The Longcat remix
The Longcat remix

Shortcat is closely related to Longcat, but what of his other family members? Recently a DNA test confirmed that Longcat is blood-related to the bastardized Shatcat.

Longcat facts

  • Many new users speculate that Longcat cat is not lengthy, but it is in fact long.
  • Longcat and Speedycat are not just dating but have actually had an offspring named Splongcat.
  • Longcat is the longest substance known to man.

ASCII Longcat

For your flooding pleasure, ascii Longcat's length has been increased to 2,142 lines, which is the maximum length most IRC clients will allow given the number of characters involved.

    /\___/\
   /       \
  |  #    # |
  \     @   |
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   /       \______
  / _______ ___   \
  |_____   \   \__/
   |    \__/
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   /        \
  /   ____   \
  |  /    \  |
  | |      | |
 /  |      |  \
 \__/      \__/

Longcat is looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong

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Longcat in its natural habitatz.


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IRL Longcat


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Longcat in a dark cave


YouTuber confused about the care of Longcats (Tacgnols in this case)

Gallery

Longallery is looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong

See also

External Links


Longcat is part of Classic Solid Chanspeak
          a series on Memes Fleeting Failed Not a Meme
Click one of the six categories to expand that category.
Time-Tested
Classics
A Cat Is Fine TooAll Your Base Are Belong To UsA Master Is OutA winner is youAn HeroBaby fuckBarrel rollBayeux TapestryBel-AirBitches Don't KnowBix NoodBrian PeppersBridgetBuy A DogCandlejackCatnarokCaturdayCeiling CatCentipede filled vaginaChuck NorrisCockmonglerCopypastaCreepypastaDelicious CakeDemotivatorsDesuDiabeetusDivide By ZeroDO IT FAGGOTDO NOT WANTDuckrollEpic Fail GuyEpic ThreadsFGSFDSGaijin 4KomaGeorge ZimmerGoodnight Sweet PrinceHA! HA! GuyHAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKSHappycatHappy NegroHow Do I Shot Web?I Am In Your Base Killing Your D00dsI CameI Has A ShuvelIMMA CHARGIN MAH LAZERINTERNET HATE MACHINEI See What You Did ThereOh god how did this get here I am not good with computerOver 9000ITTY BITTY BABY ITTY BITTY BOATJESUS CHRIST IT'S A LION GET IN THE CAR!LOL WUTLongcatMilhouse is not a memeMoarMudkipsNigga stole my bikeOh exploitableO RLYPedobearPool's ClosedProfitRaptor JesusReaction GuyRickrollThe Sandwich ChefSean ConneryThe Singing SharkThis Looks ShoppedWRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYOU ARE DOING IT WRONGZippocatZA WARUDO????/Profit
Ordinary
Memes
4chan bans4chan Stencils404 GirlAwesomeBIKECATBlockatielBorschtBroccoli DogBunny PancakeBuzzkillingCactuarCard CrusherCarltonChris HansenCovini C6WCreepy ChanDicks EverywhereDOUBLE NIGGERDougDSFARGEGGarfieldENGLISH MOTHERFUCKERF40PHFacepalmFrosted ButtsGaijin 4KomaGentlemenGordon the Pringles GiraffeHappy SnakeHouseHypnotoadI am LegendI GOT NORTON!I'd Hit ItINVISIBLE...I'm 12 years old and what is this?IS IT CAN BE HUGS TIEM NOW PLEES?Is This BattletoadsIt's a Trap!Jam It InJohn LockeKILL IT WITH FIRELaw 4 KidsMachine CodeMan The HarpoonsMario DrawingsMilk BagsMSPaint Relationship ThreadNanomachinesOM NOM NOM NOMParty HardPLEASE RESPONDPretty cool guyPush ButanPut Shoe On HeadRape ClockShitting Dick NipplesSlowpokeSpeedycatSpengbabSteel HeartsTeh ReiThat Fucking Catdelayclose.jpgTONIGHT WE DINE IN HELLUSB lineVespene gasWahaWeegeeWhat is Love?Why So Serious?Wrong Location NiggerX? In My Y?Yaranaika
Jargon and
Textual Memes
Bring Back SnacksBut who was xBumpClippitCombofagCool story broDrawhoreFixedFukken savedGrey AreaHA HA HA, OH WOWI don't think you have an X. Enjoy your Y.in before Xlurk moarNever forgetNewfags can't XNO UNobody CaresPic UnrelatedPosting in an epic threadRelevant to my interestsRules Of The InternetSauceStick It In Her PooperStop postingVerbose ThreadWeeabooWHARRGARBLWhere is your X now?X is not your personal armyX Y is X
15 Minutes
of Fame
360 kid4chan Battlecards4chan Gaming4chan Gold AccountApproval GuyAudioBeat A RodBecause of Parkinson'sBirdmanBoxxyChild AbductionBRB, CHURCHbrb, compromisedbrb, soupBrinks Home SecurityChin-chanCoolfaceDental PlanDick NeckDynamic EntryExtreme AdvertisingFeels good manFishing CatFlea Market Montgomery#fortuneGary OakGodhand EditGoofy TimeGrin ReaperGuess The MemeHi-tech military softwareHoly GrailHOW CAN SHE SLAP?!?I DIDN'T EAT THAT FUCKIN SANDWICH OR THE TOILET THING EITHER!I Has A BucketI need a price check ...I TOUCHED HIS PENIS!! OMGJosef FritzlJxcelDolghmQTime for a DickingChocolate RainLarge Hadron ColliderLeave Bond to meLINK MAH BOIIIIILOLCHAIRMavica SpriteMichael PhelpsMordorNevada-tanNod FlendersOctocatOh No You Didn'tOperation Falcon PunchOperation LIONCASHPerfection GirlPokepunsPower WristRAGEROW ROW FIGHT THE POWAHSFW PornShamwowSteve IrwinStingraySUP DAWGSwirl FaceSwitch police onTapestry DogTyrannosaurus ReichUninformed LisaVTEC Just Kicked In YoWhat is a man?Why So Exploitable?Woll SmothZach Braff Quotes
Close
But No Cigar
27Advice DogApples BearAsianfaceBig DogBillCAPS EAGLECOMBO BREAKERCool your jetsDancing OwenDick ButtDrama Prairie DogFUCK YEAH SEAKINGFurseisekiThe FuryGastonGETGet into the LoopGirugameshHai guyI AM BEOWULF!I don't roll that wayJack SpicerL-L-LUNAJACK!Living On A PrayerNavidNyoro~nObjection!oh shit i'm sorry i meantPost ending in 75 GirlRedtube RouletteRitaSHIT IT OFFShortcatSkittle NiggerStaredogSo cashTAP LADEDANS FISTON!THE BESTUNITINUWHEN I WASYou Laugh, You LoseYOU'RE A BIRD!
No.

Milhouse



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