Meyshi

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Meyshi is a 16-year old whiny, crybaby bitch who writes shitty fanfiction. She's an Internet tough guy with a plentiful helping of extra whore who populates every chapter of her fanfiction with TL;DR details about how she isn't taking any of it in the ass, but in reality she's extremely butthurt. It is also common knowledge that Meyshi is also an unwed mother who popped one out before she even graduated high school. Also, amusingly, the stupid whore can't keep her own fucking age straight. Originally, her FF.net profile said she was "of age but not old enough to drink", and now says she's 16. However, her fucking Yahoo!360 piece of shit page sez OMG 34!?111 Her pics however, are pics of a fatty teenager - Meyshi, you aren't fooling anyone, you fucking cow.

Recently, her tripe was sporked by a member of the Elljay community, Deleterius, and she threw a temper tantrum, resulting in many lulz.

Meyshi. Also note that this is a typical Fat girl angle shot
Meyshi. Also note that this is a typical Fat girl angle shot

Meyshi, keep in mind that we're doing it for the lulz and beyond!

Details below.

Contents

[edit] You got your Stu in my fandom!

Teegan's reaction when he sees Harry nekkid
Teegan's reaction when he sees Harry nekkid

Introducing Teegan Gylden, the half lion demon Norwegian supermodel queer Marty Stu (see furry), compliments of Meyshi's twisted, twisted mind. Disturbingly popular, this godawful character appeared in every single one of her fan fictions as the friend of Harry Potter or Draco Malfoy and, later, the lover of Blaise Zabini (no, really, every single one -- you can see for yourself). This stupid twatwaffle also thinks she has the right to lay claim to copyright on a motherfuckin' fanfic.

First discovered by Deleterian Malganis, who did what any sane sporker would do in this situation: tear the story to fucking shreds.

Little did she know just what her righteous act would cause.

[edit] The Saga Begins

Malganis's original post (down on LJ due to lawyer-induced AIDS, however, still available to read here) caused a huge stir from all of Meyshi's closest friends, and within days of it being posted, at least 100 anonymous comments had been posted telling the sporker how horrible she was for exercising her right to satire and how she would burn in hell for insulting Meyshi's stu.

But did Malganis go down without a fight? Hell, no! Even when Meyshi filed a DCMA report to LJ Abuse, she stood firm by her convictions. Only when they threatened to ban her did she finally relent to the pressure.

Meyshi may have won the battle, but she didn't win the war.

[edit] Touché, Meyshi!

In a fit of fervour, other Deleterians rose to Meyshi's challenge, the first of which was Snuffy Livingston, who took on another one of her terrible, terrible fan fictions and sporked it into oblivion:

http://snuffylicious.livejournal.com/56280.html

Soon following were others:

This may only be the beginning of the story. But lulzy updates will be posted as they warrant.

[edit] Quotes

 
“ 		 
IF YOU DON'T LIKE TOMSOI YOU CAN SUCK MY DICK FROM THE FUCKING BACK
  		„
 

—Meyshi (has a dick?)

 
“ 		 
Until I decided to buck up and take flattery like a man…well wo-man.
  		„
 

—Meyshi, (is sexually ambiguous?)

 
“ 		 
It’s easy being ‘hardcore’ over the internet, but let’s see if I catch you guys in Miami or Ft. Lauderdale.
  		„
 

— Meyshi, being an Internet tough guy, yet again

 
“ 		 
MY OC -- TEEGAN -- IS ONE OF THE MOST LOVED ORIGINAL CHARACTERS IN THE HP/DM FANDOM AT THE MOMENT AND IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT? FUCK YOU WITH A PIECE OF PLY WOOD AND NO VASELINE!
  		„
 

—Meyshi, being a self-obsessed, arrogant little assface

 
“ 		 
Biggest Achievement: Put your hands up infront of our face okay? Then let your thumb touch your other thumb, and you left index finger touch your right. Now make that a perfect, full circle. Now imagine pushing that out. Yeah...I survived that.
  		„
 

—Meyshi, admitting to being a 16-year old slutbag destined for a life of welfare and state aid

Meyshi =/= Malcom X
Meyshi =/= Malcom X
 
“ 		 
I feel like Malcom X...mmm...Malcom X...so hot!
  		„
 

—Meyshi, delusional that her ZOMG butthurt LJ wank was for the good of the world

 
“ 		 
whatever. And to make it even funnier, they don’t leave an email or sign in to because they KNOW I’d verbally massacre their self-esteem.
  		„
 

—Meyshi, being a contradictory batshit Internet tough guy

the Irony: in fear of getting even moar butthurt without vaseline, Meyshi disabled anonymous commenting. Therefore all who sent her reviews were logged in and all that jazz.

Note: A pathetic puddle of dog shit like Meyshi destroying the self-esteem of others? She'll have to try with a spoon or reptile first! LULZ!

[edit] Profanity for the lulz

An activity for you when you're bored: you get one cookie for each cussword you find and +2 points for every 'fuck' you see in that letter
An activity for you when you're bored: you get one cookie for each cussword you find and +2 points for every 'fuck' you see in that letter

Meyshi is also known for her use of profanity and CAPSLOCK. Though, if you take a look at the letters she wrote you'd probably be extremely amused (or laughing your ass off), the language is so foul that it's not foul anymore.

[edit] Meyshi Strikes Back!!!111eleventy!!!

On Saturday, August 11th, 2007, several members of Deleterius received DCMA notifications from LJ Abuse, stating that their newest sporks of Meyshi's works violated the 16-year old mother's overly stretched pussy. At least two users have filed counter-suits, and at least one has declared intent to file counter-suit, should Meyshi take this to court, intending to sue for expenses. It will be interesting to see if Meyshi's Mommy and Daddy allow this to go all the way to trial and see her OMG DIRTEH GAY SMUT.


UPDATE: Cayde filed his counter-notification and got accepted, and as a fuckin awesome Attorney at lol he's showing everyone else how to use the law to raep Meyshi's already hurting pussy.


[edit] August 12th, 2007

On Sunday, August 12th, 2007, several more members of Deleterius were served. Non-passive resistance against this obnoxious bint continues. As the situation began to look grim, Cayde got a fucking winning idea. If Meyshi wanted to claim to have copyright over JK Rowling's work, why not tell the people that mattered? Cayde emailed JK Rowling's publicist. Lulz ensued.


[edit] OH NO3S!!! TEH ATTORNEYS 4 REALZ!!!!

On August 14th, 2007, at 1 PM PST, Cayde got a phone call from a New York law firm whose name is withheld because Cayde doesn't want to shoot a gift horse in the mouth. Yet. JK Rowling's lawfirm is pretty fuckin pissed off that Meyshi thinks she has a legal right to file claims over Rowling's work, and has asked that, voluntarily, all members of Deleterius e-mail Cayde to get their infos to the lawyers AS SOON AS MOTHERFUCKIN POSSIBLE if they want to help with the legal, IRL raep of Meyshi. Cayde's only regrets are that he was too far in fucking shock to record the goddamn conversation, and that he screamed like a little girl when he got off the phone. Much fapping commenced in the Deleterius community upon Cayde's announcement of the impending pwnage.

[edit] ZOMG TROLL PR0N

On August 17th, 2007, a troll spammed Deleterius with (sucky and obviously googled with safesearch on) porn and BSD pictures. It was summarily deleted after some annoyance, and is assumed to be one of Meyshi's asskissers or Meyshi herself as a sockpuppet.


[edit] DELETED FUCKING EVERYTHING!

On December 29, 2007, malganis returned to Meyshi's ff.n page to discover that the author had deleted every one of her fics (except for the craptacular 18-chapter epic "Argent Ameth") and replaced them with a 'new' story: "The Ants Under the Lamp Shade", wherein Draco and Blaise are art gallery owners and Harry is a starving teenage artist who will inevitably get butt-banged by Draco. And of course, like a bad case of herpes, there's Teegan fuckin' Gylden...AGAIN.

This craptastic fic already has nearly twenty ass-kissing reviews, despite the fact that it's basically the same old shit that Meyshi had before, and so malganis ripped into it again with her spork, chewing into that motherfucking fic like a starving lion on a zebra's ass.

Though there are currently only two chapters, neither of them containing teh buttsecks, lulzy sex scenes are eagerly awaited by the Deleterius community.

[edit] External Links

Retrieved from "http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/Meyshi"
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