Mixcds
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
If you've made one before, then it is high time you and I had a little chat. And if you've never made one before, then please don't do something that you may one day regret.
[edit] What Do You Mean? What's Wrong with MixCDs?
A MixCD is a compliation of songs that is given to a potential lover for them to listen to. These songs are supposed work like emotional warez that will hardwire that person into thinking that your love for them is REALLY DEEP and SPECIAL and in fact that it is DEEPAR THAN ANY LUV EVAR.
Unfortunately, the failure rate is high. Very high.
[edit] So Then Why Did I Make Them?
The average MixCD maker believes that purpose of said CD is seduction. The real purpose is to publicly admit that you are fail.
[edit] No Really, You Don't Know Him/Her. It's Going To Work For Me, I Can Feel It!
If you insist. For the purposes of avoiding pronoun buggery in the "How To" section, let us assume you are a heterosexual male or a lesbian female. For the purposes of INTERNET, let us also assume that you are ugly and unwanted.
[edit] Step 1: How To Make It
- Pirate some mp3 warez.
- Keep them emotionally 1337 (see above).
- When in doubt, consult the geniuses at Pitchfork Media.
- Kill It With Fire onto a CD-R.
- Label it in some way. Her name drawn with flowers? Some poetry you wrote? Loldongs? Show your creativity!
- Make the handover.
- Wait for the result.
- OMG! I wonder what she is thinking and feeling right now!
[edit] Step 2: Is You Success? Went You 1337?
Did she call you up crying?
Did she come over to smoke your pole?
Is she your girlfriend now?
[edit] Step 3: NO? NO!?
Incredible. You must have picked the wrong songs or something. Srsly, A MixCD always works. Think of the deep emotions you had while making it! Those emotions are shared!
Just kidding. Giving someone a MixCD essentially states that you are hopeless and that you realize, somewhere deep down, that you will never sleep with this person, nor will they ever love you, nor will perhaps any person ever love you, ever.
This realization may trigger desperation and severe self-denial.
[edit] Step 4: Mix CD as Final Solution? O RLY?
Well, you certainly did fuck up whatever small chance you had. But that's not the final solution we're talking about here.
She does not love you, and it is time to kill again.
[edit] Step 5: Do That Shit, Hombre!
Perform the raep after the fact. That always looks better in court.
[edit] Moral Of The Story
[edit] Famous MixCDs
- The one you gave to that popular girl
- The one that failed.
- The one that worked (mythical)
- Tori Amos sings her most boring songs.
- Every shitty techno album ever.
- Vivaldi's Four Seasons (Pretty dope, actually).
- Every CD is mixed, dummy. It's just usually done for money, not for hugbox as in your case.
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