Nationstates
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
NationStates is a lame online game in which over 9000 would-be dictators (and, frequently, would-be dick tasters) make their own little pretend countries and discuss politics. Then they get banned and cry about it on other websites, even if nobody gives a shit. At least they're not furries. Not anymore, lol (c.f. Hataria, Free Furry Islands, Far Echo Islands, Kitsuneville, Cazelia and Lyncanthropia).
NationStates was actually created to advertise a book by unfunny Aussie Max Barry (who is bald to assist in unbirthing) called Jennifer Government, but nobody cares about that, mainly because it fucking sucks. Anyway, why read a book when you could be imaginary-raping imaginary peasants in your imagination?
It's run by Commies (confirmed by players) and at least one furfag (obvious). Anyone expressing a right-wing political bias is either banned or sent to work in Siberian uranium mines (confirmed). They also ban pirates, people pretending to be pirates, anybody who makes a joke, anybody who posts a smiley, and anybody who the moderators randomly decide should die. This causes much crying from the losers that use the site. However, they seem to tolerate fascists, Nazis, child molesters, pedophiles, and retards very well. It is advised to not argue with these people as Godwin's law usually applies itself around post three. Alternatively, if it doesn't, the conversation devolves into incoherent babble which will then make your throat want to strangle itself. Sometimes this involves cheesecake, which is delicious, but most often it does not.
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[edit] The crappy RP Forums
Two forums, "International Incidents," and the creatively named "NationStates" forum, are devoted to roleplay. The writing on the former consists mostly of basement-dwellers waving their kilometer long, multi-turreted, rail-gun-armed, armored steel dicks (compensation for their RL inadequacies) at each other. Posts that involve characters that are not said metal phallic substitutes are pure shit, usually consisting of two barely coherent sentences or less. Most of the time, attempts at war RP's devolve into whiny arguments about "god-modding" involving lots of pseudo-physics and flaming. Sometimes one of the fags involved is amusingly hit with the banhammer for being a tard, which the victim will sometimes come back under a different name and complain about.
The latter forum ("NationStates") claims to be more "character-based" and "story-based." This really just means that it consists of long posts which are merely thinly veiled softcore written smut, some of which is perilously close to furfagdom, and the rest of which is either LOTR ripoffs (woooo! elves in space!), or Underworld ripoffs (mostly written by Assington, The Golden Simatar and other snobs) or both (written by Tarlachia, Callisdrun, a girly-man pervert who likes menstrual blood and should be skull fucked).
These RPing circle jerks have spawned several smaller spin-off forums consisting of members who were too emo for nationstates and sad because of their insignificance. The best of these is Sovereign Kingdoms, due to the fact that the guy who runs it (as well as making over 90% of the site's posts) is a Christian fundamentalist who isn't afraid to share his opinions on niggers, jews and government. Other spin-offs include Daily Escape, Global Progress, Nations Online and World at Play. These all suck even more than NationStates, however, due to the fact that their members are teenage fucktards who can't go a week without fucking up their own site for entertainment because their posts suck so much. The usual instigator of this is Josh Latimer, a pathetic drop-out and self proclaimed libertarian ass burger who lives in his mom's basement, and pouts if anyone calls him on either his short attention span or his habit of fucking up.
[edit] The even worse non-RP Forums
Other forums include "Gameplay," where idiots come to ask how to change their flag, their region, their motto, or any of a variety of stupid questions that their down syndrome asses can't figure out themselves, "United Nations," where nsfags go to take themselves too seriously as if their proposals actually mattered and weren't just hours of wasted time, "Moderation," where people go to whine about getting flamed or banned, an activity that causes much laughing among the mods, and "General."
This last is filled with pseudo-intellectuals, commies, wine-sipping socialistas, creationists, evolutionists who hate the creationists, volvo-driving liberals, bush-fellating conservatives, anarchists, libertarians (most of which claim they have Asperger's Syndrome), niggers, camwhores, objectivists, fags, morons who hold every kind of dumbass political ideology ever invented, old farts and all other manner of annoying people who should not be on the internet. Apparently half the forum has some form of autism or other mental disorder. Memes from 4chan often appear in watered down form on NSG years later. The moderators basically keep anything from getting too fun, chiefly by banning anyone who pwns another poster too massively. The entire forum suffers from unwarranted self importance and consists almost entirely of attention whores. It gets boring after about a day because in the history of the forum there has never been an original thread (except for the one Der Fuhrer Dyszel titled "If I had a Penis," which the mods ruined by changing the title to "If I was a man," which demonstrated how the mods are anti-fun, as the thread was not about DFD waking up as a man, but as a dick-girl) since the creation of the site.
[edit] Other crap
Things that are Banned from NSG include, but are not limited to: Goatse, Tubgirl, lemonparty, hai2u, 2girls1cup, porn, God Hates Fags, Swastikas (in nation flags), 4chan, thread titles that aren't bland, Encyclopedia Dramatica, Something Awful and fun.
NationStates and its users are so gay, that after coming into contact with them, you won't be able to resist looking at wang. The only good things about NationStates is that it has been infiltrated by Anonymous and also hates Scientology (with a handful of exceptions).
[edit] How to Troll NationStates
If you want to make a nuisance of yourself in this game, just follow these simple step-by-step instructions.
- Create a nation.
- Get UN status.
- Go to a region and become the UN Delegate. (If you are in a founderless region, this next step is much easier)
- With your power as UN Delegate, eject and ban everyone from the region simultaneously.
If you do this late at night, it will be at least a day before anyone notices. Even if someone notices, no one will actually do anything. Seriously. Nothing.
Alternatively, post a thread on General saying you support anything. It doesn't matter what—but generally, conservative bias achieves moar lulz. Edit: Be sure to stick around and pretend to argue for whatever position your thread is supporting/condemning/whatever. This way it will take them longer to realize that you are a troll. If possible, start a huge new argument over some technicality in someone's post. This will have them going for hours and will make your trolling most lulzy. However, no troll is ever as good as Jesussaves.
Alternatively alternatively, post something mean about the faggot known as "Fass" (also known as Fassigen and Fassitude). This will cause an uproar on the forum, with about half leaping to this forum celebrity's defense and the other half agreeing with whatever terrible things you are saying about him. Can be highly entertaining if you're plagued by boredom. Moar difficult, but also great fun, is trolling the fuck out of Soviestan.
[edit] Semi-delicious copypasta
Who made it? Fuck if anyone knows, but it's hilarious for 1. lolbertarianism and 2. RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE.
[edit] See also
[edit] Link
- NationStates, the game where everyone's a loser
- Angries and angrier response Some whore-bag bitch named Hydesland would go as far to moan and whine about this article in between her smoke breaks, AA meetings and a gay-pride parade.
- LAF the link you'll want to click after playing it. Boo fuckity hoo.
