Nice Guys
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
'Nice guys' are fat guys that want to have sex but are too fat to attract women so they pretend to be nice and do lots of nice things in the hope that the woman will look past their disgusting, greaseball body and spotty face and have sex with them because they're such nice guys. This technique is guaranteed to fail and leads the fatty to put up angsty websites or journals about how much he hates all women for being evil. Some argue that if they want sex, then they should spend less time faking niceness and more time losing some weight, the lardasses.
Self-proclaimed "Nice Guys" out there, who will bitch and rant and rave and moan about how the girl who they're Desperately In Love With is such a bitch and cuntwagon and whore because she refuses to return their Sincere and Earnest Passion. After stating all of her worst qualities, they will bewail her tendency to deny their Eternal Devotion and Caring so she can date a Total Bastard Who Will Break Her Heart. After all, Mr. Nice Guy is in love with her. And, uh, well, he's such a NICE person! Isn't that enough?
No, asshole, it's not enough. You can't make girls fall in love with you, and considering that you're hellbent on telling the world what an utter whore they are, they shouldn't feel any obligation to try. Oh, and by the way, when you hate a girl because she won't screw you or whisper sweet nothings in your ear (Like, more cocks please.) or whatever the hell you want her to do, YOU ARE NOT A NICE GUY!
