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Norway

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

(Redirected from Norwegian)

Norway (or Snoreway: Heroin Capital of the World as it is often called) is a dislocated barren ice mountain in the middle of the arctic off the coast of Europe. It is inhabited by the descendants of Vikings who were famous for raping and killing the French and the English. There are not many countries where people do nothing but drink themselves to death and beat eachother up (including their family), but Norway is one of those few.

1 Norwegian History
2 Fun Facts About Norway
3 Norwegian Televison
4 Famous Norwegians
5 Neighboring shitholes

[edit] Norwegian History

The first Norwegians, vikings, inhabited Norway ca. 9001 years ago. As time passed, they learned more and more hi-tech things like making a bonfire and basic farming. But as the climate in Norway is about as warm as the south pole, every attempt to become moar civilized failed. So, the bold vikings raided places like England and France for the ~~loot~~ lulz. For the next 500 years, Norway was Denmark's bitch. They then got freedom in 5 minutes, before getting buttraped by Sweden.

Nowadays, Norway is a thriving country with a great cultural diversity. As they have a load of Jew golds, Norway managed to stay out of the European Union.

[edit] Fun Facts About Norway

Norwegian internets, The primary sources of rape and pillage get together.

In Norway, only 1 out of 12 convicted rapists are sent to jail. As such, rape is believed to be about 92% legal in Norway.

Norway used to have an anti-Jew paragraph in its constitution. Then a homosexual hippy named Henrik Wergeland came along and tricked people into feeling sorry for them. Suddenly, Jews, hundreds of them came and started singing Jewish folksongs!!

Norway was originally a floating arsenal of virgins created by the Nazis during World War II to spite Churchill. To spite the French, it was later crashed into Northern Europe, where it remains.

Norway was the first location to abolish heterosexuality.

Norway has the world's largest population of black metal fans, who enjoy discussing Hitler, burning down churches, and eating their friends' brains [1]. Every single one of them is a homosexual.

Norwegians are forced to wear masks out of shame.

The city Lillehammer got electricity and applesauce just because the winter Olympics were held there.

Norway has more Norwegians than any other place in the world except the Internets.
Norway is so hard to find that it cannot be seen on radar.

It is so expensive to live in Norway that only Norwegians can afford to live there.

Norway was home to a very rare parrot, the Norwegian Blue, which is now extinct. The last one died on set of an English TV comedy series in the 1970's apparently pining for the fjords.

In the city of Tromsø, located in the northern region of Norway, 95% of all buildings are built from fishbones.

Norway's trees-to-people ratio stands on 1,000,000 to 1, which means the Hominoidea make up about 34% of Norway's population.

EFnet has the largest concentration of exile Norwegians, though most of them are actually Russians with a bad sense of direction.

The average number of fingers a Norwegian has is 8, many suspect this has something to do with the growing appeal of heavy metal over the last 11 decades.

Norway is the first city to outlaw the usage of the numbers 7, 8 and 9 out of solidarity to the large logging industry in the region.

Norway is constantly pwned and urinated on by a superior country known as Wallachia.

Most importantly, Norway is devoid of the internets.

Typical Oslo folks.

About 20% of all inhabitants of Oslo are drug-addicted, homeless beggars. This behavior is perfectly legal in Norway, because the police aren't allowed to stop criminals. Law enforcement is frowned-upon, because it is considered "rude" to uphold the law unless it's tax related.

Income tax in Norway is 50%, a pint of beer costs fifteen dollars, and a pack of smokes costs 20 dollars. There's a 25% VAT on all products in addition to other taxes. Most citizens are too poor to afford meat or fresh vegetables, and sustain themselves on rationed bread and goat milk cheese.

Food in Norway is so expensive that it alone can make over 9000 an heros, the goverment does this for massive lulz.

It is also illegal to smoke in Norway, but legal to purchase tobacco, and since Norwegians are dumb, they still spend half their wages buying cigarettes, and wallowing in pity every time they want to light one. 10-30 times a day. They then throw them away and buy a new pack to stimulate the economy. Intelligent Norwegians therefore use snus instead.

The proud Norwegian state elite.

The Norwegian Parliament is governed by an army of matriarchal communists. Assembled in front of the Royal Palace in Oslo, from left to right: King Harald, Prime Minister Jens Stoltenberg, an entourage of Marxists, and the Chief of Police.