Pangya

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Whoops, you're a pedophile now.
Whoops, you're a pedophile now.

Pangya is another Korean MMORPG with a "twist": you play golf. You know, the thing your grandfather plays?

Contents

[edit] Storyline

Surprised? The entire world is too. A golf game has a plot on WHY you hit balls into holes. You see, a long time ago, in a paralell dimension to Earth, there was a magical island-world known simply as Pangya. All was peaceful in Pangya until one day, an evil force summoned by the Demon King, came crashing down upon the land. This dark energy created a force field around Pangya that drained the life from the land. The world of Pangya grew weaker and weaker with every passing day. Flowers withered, trees grew barren, and the earth lost its green. The people of Pangya could not come up with a solution to rid their land of the evil presence. Until one day… The inhabitants of the land realized that all of the life force from Pangya was being drained to the Demon King through a hole in the force field. They quickly gathered and came up with a plan. They would collect the spirit force of all living things into a magic crystal ball they called the Mystical Phoenix. They knew if they placed this into the hole of the force field, they could defeat the evil which has plagued them. But the power of the crystal became so great with the spirit force that it could not be touched by human hands. So the people in Pangya created the Air Lance, a tool in the shape of a stick to hit the Mystical Phoenix ball into the hole of the evil force field. But the crystal grew weaker every time it was struck, so it was very important to hit the ball into the hole with the fewest amount of strokes possible. It was a warrior from Earth who was finally able to accomplish this feat, ridding the island from the evil force for good.

So basically, you hit a ball in a hole because an hero did it to slay a beast. Incredible how someone can make an excuse to play golf amirite?

Typical gameplay.
Typical gameplay.

[edit] Gameplay

Gameplay is just like every other generic golf game, except that you actually grind. Yes, you grind in a game that your father and his father play together after Church. A lot of people note that it revives the old pastime of golf, but all jokes aside, it's just every other MMORPG in existence with a putter, a ball, and some lolis. Getting back to gameplay, it's just like golf, you try to aim just right and then hit it completely wrong, hitting the water, some sand, or a tree, totally pissing you off and creating the drama we all know and love. The online game forces you to be Scout or Hana, who both suck, and then force you to grind with random people on golf courses for "Pang" to get items that won't let you suck. Let's not also forget that the only stat that really matters is Power, since all you do is hit the space bar twice and it isn't really that hard to Pangya unless you're a total retard.

Pangya is for Kooh, deal with it.
Pangya is for Kooh, deal with it.

[edit] Characters

Most of the information listed here is from the Wii game because the online game gives you no information about them, just looks and fap material really.

[edit] Scout

The shota of the game, and thankfully the only one. He goes on about the strength of the human heart and how it will make him strong. Also wants to secretly fuck his Caddie who looks stupid in the first place. Also a small-dick weirdo.

[edit] Hana

One of the two lolis in the game. If you're going to be a trap while playing the game online, well, guess what, you start with this. Basically Scout but a girl. Also has a nigger caddy.

[edit] Uncle Bob

A huge fatass from the world Scout comes from, and is a police officer. Surprisingly he doesn't arrest everyone for pedophilia, seeing how Kooh is totally asking for it and Hana is just a plain slut. Usually tells the kids they are huge faggots and they should worship his feet.

[edit] Kooh

The sluttiest of them all, and tsundere to top it all off. She's the captain of a pirate ship where, you can imagine, all of the pirates have sex with her. A lot of people would note that if you think Kooh is hot, you're a pedophile, but if you're playing this game, my good sir, you are one. Just the clothes she gets to start with make her look like a huge slut. If you see Kooh, you are instantly turned into a pedophile. Has a huge cannon. What does she use it for? Don't ask me.

[edit] Cecelia

A woman from the Navy. She goes on about being extremely accurate in her shots and that she learned it in the Navy, and goes on about the Navy. You know what? Fuck the navy and fuck the government.

[edit] Max

Typical "badass" character who was made so 16 year old girls will scream and make fanfics of him falling in love with them. Sadly, they don't know that he's gay or has a motorcycle fetish.

[edit] Arin

If one of said 16 year old girls actually made their way into this game, Arin would be said girl AFTER at least 100 years of cosmetic surgery. She wants Max, but since Max is a huge faggot and/or a mechanophile, he doesn't really give a fuck.

[edit] Kaz

The only Gar looking character in this game. His attitude is too Cloud-like, so he will probably turn out to be a huge crybaby, since he's the "Forgotten man on the golf course" or some shit.

[edit] Lucia

Probably the worst Hannah Montana copy ever made. Her attitude reminds you of the slutty attitude Hannah or Miley is. Probably had sex with Max. Probably also fucked by Pedobear coz she's one of those 16 year old girls.

[edit] The Caddies

Eye candy with shitty stats, especially Brie. Fucking slut.

[edit] United States and X-Play are doing it wrong

After Pangya turned out to be a huge hit in the east, they decided to move it to the states, where they randomly thought that they should change the name of the game to make everyone facepalm and wonder why the hell changing the name of the game was so damn important. They named it "Albatross 18", which makes no sense except that you can very rarely get an "Albatross" if you get the ball in the hole in 2 turns on a 5 hole course. After all of this, they found out that they were successful on making everyone want to have sex with Kooh, they released the game on the Wii. Later, when X-Play reviewed Super Swing Golf, they noted that the game was called "Albatross 18" in Korea as well, which also lead viewers to realize that they shouldn't watch X-Play for reviews.

Hmm, nothing dirty about this, proceed.
Hmm, nothing dirty about this, proceed.

[edit] UBAR HAX

Seeing as it is obvious that Pangya is for those who lust for the kiddies some people thought that they should hack the models in the game and add things like: Naked Kooh, Naked Kooh, Naked Kooh, and Naked Kooh. There are other hacks too, but of course, like in every other game, they are only used for the lulz and most of the players will get pissed off at the game developers, not the program that 99.999% of shitty games use for shitty protection against hacking.

[edit] External Links

Pangya is part of a series on MMORPGs.

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