Joseph Evers welcomes new LinkedIn and Facebook connections!

Physics

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

Jump to: navigation, search
Physics class notes
Physics class notes

An often ignored fact of reality used by trolls and scientists to point out how YOU ARE EDUCATED STUPID, physics makes the internet go 'round.

Advanced waterbong physics
Advanced waterbong physics

Contents

[edit] Explosives did WTC

Everyone knows Jews did WTC, but scientologists would have you believe that Government did WTC. This is because they have a 13 year old boy's understanding of physics. The twin towers, they say, could not have fallen anywhere near terminal velocity. Therefore OMG EXPLOSIVES! You can see why this is stupid by conducting the following experiments.

[edit] Facts Exploited through Physics

[edit] Heavy things fall harder than light things

Here is a science experiment you can try at home. Drop one marble on your head and have a friend measure the time it takes to hit your cranium. Now drop a bowling ball on your head and measure the time it takes to crack your skull. Both fall in the same amount of time, but one has a good chance of killing you.

[edit] Jet fuel is hot

If you have survived the previous experiment, try this one. Find a piece of wood, any size will do. Now, light that piece of wood on fire. Hold that peice of wood in your hand and time how long you can hold it. Now, soak a rag in kerosene and light that on fire. Again, time how long you can stand to hold it. Make sure you use your unburnt hand, as the previous hand will likely have nerve damage. You should find that one hand burned faster than the other.

[edit] Other facts facts of physics

[edit] Computers rely on the flow of electrons through micro-transistors to function

Self-explanatory really. Some argue that computers rely on the flow of material through tubes.

The above is incorrect. In fact, computers run on magic smoke. This is evidenced by the fact that computers always cease to work when the magic smoke is released from them.

The above is incorrect. In fact computers, like the internets, run on tubes. This is evidenced by the fact that when you release the magic smoke by using a torch and some gasoline the internets do not disappear.

[edit] Higher up things fall harder than lower down things

Imagine a young lady standing on the roof of a house naked. If she throws a rock straight into the air and it lands on the man in the bushs masterb8ting to her it will hurt a lot more than if dropped from, say, the first floor window. This has to do with Newton's law which states that there are no girls on the internets so they must be standing on the roof, naked.

[edit] Magnets move things

Some people believe that magnets can control metal. This is false. Only Magneto can control metal.And the force. This is proven by the picture associated. Look tharr foar proofs.

This chart is and ancient diagram showing how Obi-wan might use the force to control metals.
This chart is and ancient diagram showing how Obi-wan might use the force to control metals.


[edit] Longcat is long

Despite /b/ depictions, longcat=∞.

[edit] Miscellania

The arbitrary physical constants of the universe are the result of a freak chemical reaction which occured when Lowtax railed a bald eagle in the ass.

Image:Cowbell_small.jpg This article needs moar experimentation.
You can help by adding moar experimentation.
Personal tools