Puerto Rico
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
| Warning!: Puerto Ricans are known terrorists, commies and fans of Ricky Martin |
Puerto Rico was once connected to Mexico. When the Spanish brought slaves over to Mexico, they made a city on what is now the coast of Puerto Rico. The slaves had to use pick axes all day until they had went all the way down the side of the now coast. They had hit the ground so much, an earthquake occurred and broke what is now "Puerto Rico" off of Mexico. Thus, confirming what all Puerto Ricans are indeed, just Mexicans. But unlike the taco-eating wetbacks, the natives of this island don't live in complete poverty. Basically, they are just rednecks with brown skin and lots of body hair.
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[edit] Music
Puerto Rico gave birth to a gay genre of music called Reggaeton, listened to by most poor of beaners with no jobs and no lives, who are generally racially confused and believe themselves to be negro. It consists of every song having the SAME FUCKING BEAT and/or ear bleeding vocals similar to the soothing sound of a dentist's drill boring away at your rotten cavity except twice as painful PROTIP 9/10 people become an hero the second this horrible music is played within 20 feet of the listener!! This dissonance of noise is directly related to reggae, and rap, all of which are equally as gay as country. Reggaeton, like Rap, it's incredibly stupid and its used mostly as a last resort for those that have a low self esteem and dont think much of themselves to not think about about killing each other and also, for the uneducated, unemployed, broke bastard that thinks talking about that kind of nonsence will get him/her payed. Which in some cases, happens. Proving that americans, with rap, and Puerto Ricans with Reaggeton love to see their youth acting completely retarded, violent, and without any education. Which is awesome.
[edit] Reggaeton Artists
- Tego Calderon
The only nigger to speak Spanish, has a lisp big enough to put any queer in their place.
- Don Omar
The only beaner emofag.
- Tito el Bambino
Little cunt.
- Daddy Yankee
He got his name from a Puerto Rican prison rape gang, he earned his title through rampant buttsecks and rape, he is responsible for this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HA9mmDg76j8 . If you find this entertaining, please take immediate steps to become an hero. This fag gained some popularity in Murka, through unknown methods of brainwashing. He also speaks no Engrish, but he likes to pretend to because he has a low self-esteem and makes him feel better.
[edit] Things Puerto Ricans are famous for:
- Regurgitating that pile of walking asshole hair that is Jennifer Lopez.
- Farting in your mouth when you are sleeping.
- Ripping off the Cuban flag and flip-flopping the colors around like the unimaginative asshats they are.
- Taco flavored kisses.
- Flooding New York and making the place smell more like a wetback's tampon.
- William Hung
[edit] Schools
Schools in Puerto Rico are fucked up. They give chickens from garbage cans from the neighborhood, orange juice is piss, employees silently waiting to rape 13 year old boys, principals so slutty that they put skirts so short that you can see their wrinkly,old,hairy clints, and....they're full of lulz everywhere. The kids are always lookin for a fucking fight, but in the inside they are pussies like Animal Acevedo Vila. Teachers are fuckin beaners and pedophiles. the hygene in schools are horrible,piss and crap all over. Maybe Mr.Hanky thinks that that is fuckin paradise.
[edit] Politics
The United States had everything going for it until some people started bitching that it lacked diversity. White Liberals whined it had an unfavorable white person : every other person ratio. So Puerto Rico was brought in as its token not-white character. Japan and Africa were visibly upset by the casting.
Other Spanish countries now claim Puerto Rico has sold out and not kept it real. It's normal to hear puertorricans say words in english even if they dont speak english or dont have anyone that speaks english next to them. They usually do this because they think it will make them look more american and therefore, cooler. Puerto Rico shares a star on the U.S. flag with New Jersey.
[edit] Puerto Rico and the UK: A comparative essay tl;dr
Being the rape and murder capital of Spicistan, the only dyslexic from Puerto Rico here decided to write a comparative list with England to prove that Puerto Rico is the Latino equivalent of the UK:
1. Puertorrican/UK children learn how to swear from an early age.
2. Puertorrican/UK people obsess over their sports, using it as a source of drama.
3. Puertorrican/UK people obsess over their faggoty music, claiming their music is teh best.
4. Puertorrican/UK people kill each other for drugs.
5. Puertorrican/UK people kill anyone who says their country sucks.
6. Puertorrican/UK people speak the same language as their neighbors, but have nothing in common except for using rape and mantrains as a national pastime.
7. Puertorrican/UK people think you all suck, and their food is teh shit
8. They share a similar form of human vermin: UK has chavs. Puerto Rico has "cacos". Both share the same characteristics: Drive cheap tiny jalopies with fake modifications, listen to shitty music, females get pregnant when they're at least 10 years old, wear fake "bling" jewelry, hate rock music and their fans for some inconceivable reason, are responsible for more than half (if not all) the petty crimes in the area and think they're hardcore "gangstas".
9. ????
10. PROFIT!
[edit] Puerto Ricans
The human cross-pollinated result of Spanish people and former slaves ræping Indians, Puerto Ricans live in two places, Puerto Rico, and the Bronx, which is also known as "other Puerto Rico." Proud of their raep heritage, they are especially fond of sexually molesting tourists at the parade through New York City, which they are allowed to have for some reason (known as politics, actually). As if being the bastard offspring of niggers and six-armed god worshipers was somehow a reason to have a parade, rather than becoming an hero.
Due to an unfortunate typographical error in a U.S. Supreme Court decision, Puerto Ricans are considered to be Americans. Efforts to correct this woeful situation through legislation or constitutional amendment have been consistently blocked by fgts in congress who troll for gay sex in men's rooms and are therefore too occupied getting literal butthurt to focus on important things like keeping human waste out of our country.
The Puerto Rican homeland, K-Mart . . . no seriously, Puerto Rico (direct translation : raped by paco), is pwned by the US government on a daily basis and bombed by the U.S. Navy for fun and lulz on occasion. This causes huge political problems in the Bronx since so many of these halfbreed filth invaded that location, and resulted in Bronx politicians going to Puerto Rico to protest the lulz bombings, itself a massive source of lulz.
Since their heritage is based on raep between worthless races, Puerto Ricans think nothing of invading America with their filthy presence instead of staying where they belong in raped by Pacolandia. This is why their skanky, trashy women marry illegal immigrants for pesos to assist their invasion of Murka with their worthless mongrel genome. Not content to bring their own kind into our midst, they also smuggle illegal immigrants from the Dominican Republic, Haiti & other worthless countries into the USA. Puerto Rico is just another open door to the USA in the Caribbean.
Puerto Ricans also provide illegal immigrants with FAKE Puerto Rican birth certificates, driver’s licenses & other forms of fake identification.
The popular musical "West Side Story" dealt with the Puerto Rican problem. It involved a guy named Tony who fell in love with one of these children of ancient nigger/squaw/Spaniard raep, and got killed because he was stupid enough to kill her brother for no apparent reason. The moral of this play, a comedy, is that if you're a worthless piece of ethnic filth, don't form a street gang or you will die at the hands of similarly worthless human genetic waste.
Sadly, thanks to Mexico (biggest producer of spics, beaners, wetbacks, drugs, and tacos) and general spic invasion, the USA will be majority spic by 2050. You may want to reserve a ticket to Canada (best alternative), England(NOT), Australia or some other still acceptable whitey country. Not the best alternative, but as bad as things are now, just think of what will happen when these people are the majority . . .
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