Role-playing
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Role-playing is the act of pretending to be something you're not. Common among geeks, gamers and furries. Also known as mass delusion.
Role-Playing Games
- MySpace Roleplaying
- Cybersex
- Progress Quest
- Dungeons and Dragons
- LORD
- Warhammer
- Runescape
- EverQuest
- TinyTIM
- Shadowland.org
- Cyber Nations
- NationStates
- World of Warcraft (special RP servers)
- Or possibly the most annoying of all, characterhate
Internet Roleplaying
Roleplaying on the Internets is its own paradigm. Without the burdening strain of social classes and etiquette, the involved are free to explore the limitless creative possibilites, customize and develop their characters, construct engaging scenery and picturesque landscapes. Everyone can have fun and develop important real-life character traits such as social skills, literacy, imagination and improvisation. Want to be a powerful sorcerer battling the forces of the underworld? No problem - the sky is your limit. Or do you prefer to charge into battle wielding dual chainsaws? Why not! A CEO of a major oil company? Sure. An infanrtyman fighting in WW2? Naturally. Heck, you can even be a genuine Japanese schoolgirl. Nothing hinders your originality and artistic expression in the world of Internet Roleplaying.
Now isn't that cute... BUT IT'S WRONG!
Like most of the things on the Interwebs, roleplaying is a massive, frothing, festering shithole of facepalm inducing fail mostly practised by degenerate fucktards, basement dwellers and people with no social lives, aspirations or skills. Out of all the faggotry on the Interbutts, roleplaying seems to be one of those that actually has a comparable (if not greater) fanbase among women. And by women we mean Chinese pedophile neckbeards. The reasons behind those statistics will become evident soon. While the general consensus of the humanity is that this form of imagination play should end in early childhood, avid roleplayers extend this sickening obsession well into their adult years.
Recent studies have reported that 32.333%, repeating of course, of roleplayers believe that they are incarnations of fictional personae or even animals.
Roleplay falls into two general categories: Dungeons & Dragons style roleplay with dice throws and things, and Freeform roleplay, in which you just say what your character does and wait for someone to react - this can occur in an original setting, but more often than not happens in a fandom, especially Harry Potter.
There are, in fact, only five possible settings one can choose in a legitimate roleplay. This is scientifically proven:
- An obvious ripoff of an already crappy and saccharine mainstream anime. This is pretty self-explanatory. With all the Weeaboo wankers that pollute the Intertits, it is only natural to have ten "narutoxsasuke" gay buttsecks topics or equally crappy fight scenes stolen from DBZ or Bleach and rewritten by dyslectic 13-year russian dweebs with down's syndrome and a hunchback. Special cases involve sand ninja roleplay, where a particularly retarded volunteer is buried in a sandbox.
- Sparkly vampire RPs. They consist of atrociously cheap and stereotypical Mary Sue characters such as the "good" vampire that refuses to drink human blood and is generally uber sexy, plus sparkles when exposed to sunshine. Other examples include a half-vampire vampire hunter (now.. who would have expected that?), sexy female vampire femme-fatales and human women that fall desperately in love with the good vampire. This particular setting caters to morbiddly obese and butt-ugly 13-16 year old girls that don't have the mental capacity to become feminists. Read Stephanie Meiyer's Twilight series for an example of how crappy and annoying vampire RPing can get.
- High School Musical twists. Considering the popularity of that insultingly retarded movie, you are bound to find it adapted to RP form by ugly women and scrawny, pimple-ridden geeks that dream to be popular and successful in what already
is a universe created and perpetuated by mainstream media and corporate interest - High school. Needless to say, most of them fail to post even a single coherent sentence, proving once again they are nothing but a shitstained byproduct of the modern society that deserves to decay in their parents' basement until they can't stand the stench any longer and kick them out of the house.
- Harry Potter. Many stubby, hairy and overly perspirated fangirls dream of buttsecks between Ron and Draco or some shit like that. This must be because they wish to express their creativity and literary talents, and most certainly not because they are so repulsive than not even a blind stray dog would willingly fuck them.
- Various medieval and futuristic settings, possibly in D&D form. Now.. this particular subgenre is populated by a different kind of a dipshit - the elitist dumbfucks that marvel at their ability to insert five adjectives stolen from Thesaurus into every sentence. They are narcissist self absorbed cocksuckers that frequently remind others of how superior and sophisticated they are, even though their "work" would be considered semi-literate at best by any sane and educated human being. Often found casting magic missile in school backyards to repel bullies.
Bonus fact: Roleplaying was what some very strange people would do before there was World of Warcraft and Magic: The Gathering.
Godmoding involves deciding what your characters actions caused without the permission of the moderator or other players upon whom your action impacts, and arbitrarily giving your character huge powerups that nobody else has. Saying what somebody else's character does is also referred to as bunnying. It goes without saying that the majority of internet roleplayers godmode like the end is nigh, but you probably don't care about any of that.
Freeform is where the most godmoding happens, which is ironic because it is a term created in D&D, referring to a cheat code enabling one to pwn absolutely everyone - except of course other godmoders. In Freeform roleplay there is much more scope for godmoding as you don't need to know any codes. Just claim that your character kills another one with his Super 1337 strength and flaming swords. See how easy that was?
Internet roleplay can be found on various forums, notably Neopets and Gaia, as well as LiveJournal, Yahoo! and DeviantART Chat, where almost half of the chatrooms at any one time will be some sort of misspelling of "Naruto RP". Some roleplays are played by email and most contain useless acronyms and abbreviations like GM, DM, ST, PBEM, app, mod, OOC, IC, and mun.
| —Dubbya |
How To Internet Role-Play
- If male, enter wearing INCREDIBLY ghey attire such as skin tight jeans and a t-shirt with a giant flaming skull on the front and “Fuck You!” on the back. If female, enter wearing slutty clothing, like revealing tank tops and short skirts. Make sure your character’s name is stolen from a Tolkien novel of your choice, even if your character is, say, a cyborg and not an elf.
- Attempt to flirt with characters of the opposite sex by smiling, winking, and asking stupid questions.
- If male, pick fights with other male characters in order to appear tough and cool, or engage in White Knighting on behalf of some female attention whoring character. If female, constantly adjust your revealing undersized tank top because your huge, succulent breasts can barely fit.
- Constantly troll other rpers for being n00bs, or for using pretentious Shakespearean language. When they point out that you yourself are using pretentious Shakespearean language, tell them that they’re just jealous of your 1337 rping skills.
- ????
- PROFIT!
Types Of Characters Internet Role-Players Play
- Tall, attractive, skinny, huge-chested women that resemble Playboy bunnies with elf ears. These characters are played by morbidly obese, emo 16 year old girls on dozens of anti-psychotic medications – in other words, exactly the opposite of the characters they play.
- Tall, dark, handsome hunks that resemble Brad Pitt on steroids. These characters are played by skinny, pasty, 13 year old male emotards that get beat up IRL – again, exactly the opposite of the characters they play.
- Furries of all shapes, colors and sizes, most commonly cat-women and fox-women. These characters are played by furries, zoophiles, transsexuals, and 16 year old emo girls obsessed with anime.
- Super bad-ass knights clad in black armor thicker than a black penis, covered in spikes and skulls and shit like that, carrying gigantic 1337 magical swords. These characters are played by angry 13 year old emo internet tough guys that will remain virgins well into their 40s or even until their final breath. These RPers will pick fights and flamewars over absolutely nothing, and are therefore the source of much lulz.
- Tiny female winged fairies with comparatively huge chests. Basically, what you’d get if Pamela Anderson grew a pair of fairy wings and then got zapped by the ray gun from Honey, I Shrunk The Kids. These characters are played by teenage girls who crave 45 year old cock.
- Pale, morbid vampires that sit in the back of the tavern and sulk and whine, waiting for someone to give them attention and sympathy. These characters are played by emos who look and act exactly like the characters they play (that is, whiny, pasty and partially decomposed), but lack their characters’ 1337 vampire superpowers.
- Mages dressed in faggy attire and carrying 1337 magical staves and wands and other shit. These characters are played by computer programmers, geeks, and nerds who have never touched a woman IRL.
- Characters stolen from ghey anime shows like Dragon Ball Z and Ruroni Kenshin. Troll these RPers for ripping off their characters from said anime shows and enjoy the lulz.
MySpace Roleplaying
The rules to being completely kickass in MySpace roleplaying are fairly simple. They also let you instantly become a pedophile.
First off, create an account with jack'd pictures and a create a stupid name for yourself; for example: Jessie Prostitution, Roscoe BurgerKing, Cunt Slob, or Bawl Zac. I'd prefer to use the name Skeeter Cummings for instant friendship with desperate cock mongelers. The best way to get attention is to use pictures of some random scene fag, shit singer, Twilight actor, or Disney Star in either a ghey br00tal pose (scene fags), smoking/drinking, pointlessly gawking at the camera, or shaving their pubes. You're basically stealing someone's identity. OH THE FUN!
Try to find as many other "RP" accounts just like yours and friend request each one. If you really want to piss them off, tell them that they're fakes. They go apeshit, srsly. Comment them nice at first and ask if they want to "do something". The way they role-play is tricky, because most of them choose to use paragraph forms with no dashes or stars indicating what their character is physically doing. It's more like a story and requires some thought. If you aren't a complete retard, it should be easy. Use Pokemon episode scenarios if you want to aggravate them. Start your sentences off very detailed and smooth, and for extra lulz use random quotes and memes and see how they react. They get a kick out of being asked if they lieks teh mudkipz! Talk about your life and how you're all alone so no one cares for you and get them to take you somewhere. A secluded area is best. You can choose what you want to do from there. Overall, you should end the session with you raping them in the ass with an 80 foot tentacle extending from your bellybutton while Morgan Freeman gives them a nice buttery facial.
- This ending is more effective if you use a female's pictures.
Things You Will See In Every RP Chat
- Over 9,000 characters attempting to cyber in the chat, drawing massive amounts of butthurt from other RPers who haven’t gotten any e-pussy that night.
- Epic flamewars over the stupidest shit you can possibly imagine, or even nothing at all.
- One male RPer attempting to e-rape a female character, and another male RPer White Knighting in hopes of getting some e-pussy later on.
- Trolls setting fire to the room and randomly killing people.
- Faggots who like to announce "Blocked (Muted, reported, etc.)" every time you say anything.
- 10 year old boys calling people names like “dildo face” and “ass brain”.
- Male RPers threatening to kill one another IRL and claiming to be black belts in various martial arts and capable of benching over 250 pounds.
- Valley girls butchering the English language mercilessly and getting flamed by other RPers for exactly that.
- A semi-intelligent player who gets spammed for attempting to bring the logic.
An Example Of A Typical Minute In An RP Chat
***1337dave has joined Midnight Tavern*** 1337dave: *walks in* SauronTheMighty: ((1337dave, you're a n00b. learn to rp or gtfo.)) LenaBoBena: *kisses Elladrin wit lots of tounge* 1337dave: ((stfu asshole!)) CrackaJacka69: *fels Lena up and kisse her bkac* LilMissNawty: LENA AND CRACKAJACKA GET A ROOM!!!!!111 LenaBoBena: Shut the fuck up bitch!!!1! CrackaJacka69: Stfu and gtfo Nawty, Lenas my gf!! SauronTheMighty: ((or what?)) 1337dave: ((I could kick your ass blindfolded with my hands tied behind my back.)) LilMissNawty: READ THE FUCKING RULES YOU CANT CYBER INT HE ROOM!!!!!!11!!! LenaBoBena: Whateva bitch! *Nawty is now on ignore* *rubs Elladin's coc thru his jeans* 1337dave: ((dude, you couldn't last all of two seconds in my town. you fuckin pussy.)) LilMissNawty: YOU LITTLE BITCH ILL FUCKING BEAT YOU ASS!!!!!1 xxxxEmptyHeartxxxx: *cries softly in the back of the tavern, wishing somebody cared about me* MegaMann5558: 17/m/oh ne1 wanna trade pix? IM me plz! SauronTheMighty: ((wanna fuckin bet you little bitch? where do you live?)) CrackaJacka69: *starts fingerin Lena really fst and hard* LilMissNawty: MEGA MAN THIS IS AN RP CHAT NOT A PORN SITE GTFO!!!!!1! LenaBoBena: *lick Elladrins cock up n down slowly* MegaMann5558: Nawty, chill da fuck out, k? Dang ur a bitch! 1337Dave: ((sorry dude, I'm not gay like you.)) ***BDBDBDBDBD has entered Midnight Tavern*** BDBDBDBDBD: poop fcae shit eaterr fuck hed CrackaJacka69: *slide the rest of my dick into Lena's moth* SauronTheMighty: ((no seriously, where do you live? I'll drop by and kick your sorry ass right now.)) LilMissNawty: BDBD GTFO TROLL!!!!!!111!!! BDBDBDBDBD: ass fuckk bich but dick ass MegaMann5558: 17/m/oh ne1 wanna trade pix? IM me plz! LenaBoBena: *stradles Elladrin and feels his dick slid into my pussy* BDBDBDBDBD: cunt hore ass bich basterd 1337dave: ((pshh. you couldn't even win against an 8 year old girl.)) Dying_Whispers: *tentatively looks at [xxxxEmptyHeartxxxx] with tears in her eyes* CrackaJacka69: *moves his dick in and out of Lnea faster and faster* BDBDBDBDBD: penis vagina dick hore ass LilMissNawty: THIS CHAT SUCKS ITS NOT EVEN AN RP CHAT!!! BYE ASSHOLES!!!!!1 ***LilMissNawty has left Midnight Tavern*** BDBDBDBDBD: fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck LenaBoBena: *moans as Elladrin's cock fill up her pusys and rides him hrd and fast* BDBDBDBDBD: fuck fuck fuck LenaBoBena: ((yay, the bitch is gone!)) SauronTheMighty: ((where do you live you pussy? I'll fight you for real!)) 1337dave: ((wtf is your problem anyway?)) CrackaJacka69: ((finally)) xxxxEmptyHeartxxxx: *looks back at [Dying_Whispers] with tears in her eyes too, feeling the calling of a kindred spirit* ***AidynTheStrong has entered Midnight Tavern*** AidynTheStrong: *walks in* SauronTheMighty: ((Aidyn, you're a n00b. learn to rp or gtfo.))
Don't stab the kids!
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: -Lexi Loves Brian-{NEW}
Date: Sep 13, 2008 1:28 PM
your messaged by Lexi Parker!
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Sep 13, 2008 10:30 AM
-Your kissed by Brian Jonas
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: -Lexi Loves Brian-{NEW}
Date: Sep 13, 2008 1:31 PM
-your making out with lexi parker
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Sep 13, 2008 10:34 AM
-Wraps my arm around you and says "You wanna make babies with me!"
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Sep 13, 2008 10:36 AM
-Smiles and kisses you passionatly while unzipping your pants
-hugs you and whispers "sure!"-
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: -Lexi Loves Brian-{NEW}
Date: Sep 13, 2008 1:42 PM
-kisses you while taking off your shirt-
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Sep 13, 2008 10:47 AM
-Takes off your pants and then takes off your shirt while kissing your neck
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: -Lexi Loves Brian-{NEW}
Date: Sep 13, 2008 1:48 PM
-runs my hands through your hair and takes off your pants-
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Sep 13, 2008 10:51 AM
-Smiles and puts my thing in your thing
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: -Lexi Loves Brian-{NEW}
Date: Sep 13, 2008 1:53 PM
-turns my head kissed you on the lips-
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Sep 13, 2008 10:55 AM
-Smiles and goes harder
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: -Lexi Loves Brian-{NEW}
Date: Sep 13, 2008 1:59 PM
-smiles and hols on to you-
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Sep 13, 2008 11:01 AM
-Goes harder and deeper
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: -Lexi Loves Brian-{NEW}
Date: Sep 13, 2008 2:02 PM
-yells-
iloveyou♥
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Sep 13, 2008 11:06 AM
I love ya too!!!!!!!!!!!!!
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: -Lexi-{NEW}
Date: Sep 13, 2008 2:08 PM
-whispers to you "im pregnant with your child!"
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Sep 13, 2008 11:09 AM
"For now...." I mutter to myself
-I go deeper and faster
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: -Lexi Loves Brian-{NEW}
Date: Sep 13, 2008 2:12 PM
-yells-
your the best damn thing thats happened to me<3333
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Sep 13, 2008 11:13 AM
-Goes deeper and harder, hurting the baby
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: -Lexi Loves Brian-{NEW}
Date: Sep 13, 2008 2:15 PM
well dont hurt the baby!
-goes into labor-
-has twins-
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Sep 13, 2008 11:19 AM
-Goes and gets my knife and stabs the kids!
NOO!
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: -Lexi Loves Brian-{NEW}
Date: Sep 13, 2008 2:21 PM
DONT STAB THE KIDS!
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Sep 13, 2008 11:22 AM
"Too late!"
-Holds you down
"Now shut your mouth and do what I say!!"
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: -Lexi Loves Brian-{NEW}
Date: Sep 13, 2008 2:24 PM
whats wrong with you?
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Sep 13, 2008 11:24 AM
"Were over!!"
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: -Lexi-{NEW}
Date: Sep 13, 2008 2:25 PM
what?
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Sep 13, 2008 11:27 AM
"YOU HEARD ME!!!!"
"You gave me what I wanted"
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: -Lexi-{NEW}
Date: Sep 13, 2008 2:31 PM
-runs away and cries-
JERK!
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Sep 13, 2008 11:34 AM
-Grabs you and pushes you down on the bed
"You don't want to leave just yet
-Pushes my dick inside you, deeper, and harder.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: -Lexi-{NEW}
Date: Sep 13, 2008 2:35 PM
-leaves-
if your going to use me like that, then i cant be with you even though i love you.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Sep 13, 2008 11:38 AM
"I dont wanna be with you! I wanna rape you!!!"
Live-Action Role-Playing (LARP)
Rather than keeping their shameful role-playing a dark secret in their parents' basement, LARPers dress up and pretend to be their characters, occasionally in public venues. (Most times conventions for anime host "anime" LARP-)Often this results in much hilarity or to the dismay of shocked onlookers. Roughly 75% of LARPers are Goths pretending to be vampires. Sub-categories of the goths include fat chicks, skinny ugly chicks with glasses, and gay males who like to tell everyone they're really bi. Another 24% thwack each other with foam swords and throw bean-bags at each other until they have to take some form of kneeling position and continue to fight on (bravely?). The remaining 1% are furries who bring shame on humanity as they transition from ppl to BDSM slaves. If you are a furry, take heed of the lesson of Munchie and Rain - always buy a return ticket. Also, 89% of statistics are made up on the spot.
Any of the role-playing games listed above can be turned into a LARP. For example, you can LARP cybersex to make it IRL sex, but if you are a LARPer that probably isn't happening.
Still, at least they're not playing Runescape.
Videos
For more information on the dangers of LARP, watch "Mazes and Monsters" with Tom Hanks, or:
BlackRose has a message for Kiaxa Rider
MAGIC MISSLE
This is what happens when LARPers get access to money and cameras:
LARP Gallery
 All LARPers = otherkin |
 This guy is hardcore |
 you encounter the NAMBLA Larping society |
 Well, I guess there's |
See Also
Links
Role-playing  |
Vampires • Humanoids • Reptiles • The Rest • See Also
Don Henrie
• Jonathon the Impaler
• Sanguinarius
|
