Saturday Night Live

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Saturday Night Live is live/living proof that age does not make something better. What once had the occasional kinda funny skit now has devolved into strange people doing stupid things for overly extended sketches.

For instance, let's take someone with an amusing accent who isn't the negroes. While most shows would only dare have this character as an incredibly minor character barely shown at all, SNL thinks the lulz aren't truly drawn out until this character is the central focus of a 10 minute sketch.

Current watchers of present-day SNL often have problems identifying if the skit they are watching is funny with probable cause being mainly general retardation. Essentially, if SNL wasn't live and able to attract Hollywood's biggest names it would be exactly the same as an early nineties all-teen sketch show on Nickelodeon. REMEMBAR ROUNDHOUSE??!?

If the skit contains any person who could be summed up as "angry ethnic person", then you are a retard for watching even a second more than it takes to determine it. If the skit contains Tina Fey, then you are gay. (It must be true because it rhymes!) If it has Maya Rudolph, you are double gay and should probably check this checklist to see if you are a danger to society. If you tune in specifically because you wanted to see your favorite actor performing in a hilarious hour and a half of variety comedy, suicide might be for you.

Now in its 30th year (though its roots date back to a local Jew York program called Broadway Open House in the early 1950s and also draws on Chicago's Second City), Saturday Night Live is the third longest-running entertainment program in US television history (after Walker, Texas Ranger and World's Deadliest Police Chases). Tells you something about the American public, doesn't it?.

A Betamax tape exists of the very first broadcast of Saturday Night Live (then called simply Saturday Night), featuring Paula Abdul welcoming viewers with the warning, "This show is going to make you puke." while Chevy Chase snorts an eight-ball out of her ass. So far, she has yet to be proven wrong.

SNL Meets the Internet

Lorne Michaels made the first good decision of his life (aside from killing Phil Hartman and producing 30 Rock) by allowing skits and Digital Shorts to be posted on the intertubes. As 4chan has repeatedly proven, every time a tidal wave of shit is unleashed upon the internet, one is bound to find a few pieces of sweet, sweet corn.

The Lonely Island (SNL-spawned band)

In December 2005, SNL accidentally created a funny meme among 13 year old boys and collegefags, the rap song Lazy Sunday. It was an accident and Lorne Michaels swore it would never, ever happen again.

"The Lonely Island"'s Akiva as a child, practicing his dream of becoming a rapper with some other kid who may or may not have grown up to be famous

However, Andy Samberg gave a big middle finger to Lorne and live TV in general by creating Digital Shorts that dominated anything SNL has done in the past 20 years. He followed up on his original success with Dick in a Box, Jizz in my Pants, I'm On A Boat (ft. T-Pain), and Like A Boss (ft. Seth Rogen). Just like a mildly attractive girl goes clubbing with her fat friend to look better by comparison, Samberg's decent material - a beautiful kernel of genetically-modified Illinois sweet corn in a pile of rotting feces - is suddenly hilarious.