Smackjeeves

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Rule 34? moar liek rule SmackJeeves.
Rule 34? moar liek rule SmackJeeves.
A typical smackjeeves genius image.
A typical smackjeeves genius image.
A typical smackjeeves user.
A typical smackjeeves user.
Final Destination.
Final Destination.
Every uke in the history of the world.
Every uke in the history of the world.
Isn't it hot?
Isn't it hot?

Smackjeeves is an online comic community....overturned by pre-teen teenage yaoi-obsessed closet-dykes and useless spritefags who can't draw and recolor sprites. Almost everything you find here is the same regurgitated boy-love story with the formula "uke that looks like a girl + childhood angst x seme that looks like a girl + 0(plot)= KAWAII", or sprite based author comics revolving around 11 year old fags who couldn't use MS Paint to save their life. Most of the authors here think if they work hard enough, they'll some day get published by some popular comic industry in Japan, but fail to realize if they were to walk into any sort of organization, they would leave it with their printed work shoved up their asshole.


Contents

[edit] Deep writing is DEEP

Most artists on this website have the delusion that if they add enough angst, it'll be a good story. They have to make sure the "Uke" (guy that gets buttsecksed) is grieving over the loss of his parents in a fatal car crash or was once raped by his next-door neighbor.

The "Seme (guy who dishes buttsex) walks around with a cigarette in his mouth (one wonders why none of them have cystic fibrosis yet) and has no problems of his own. Sometimes, and only sometimes, the seme's a bearable character, but the question still stands as to WHY in their right mind they fell in love with a personality-less ambiguously gendered gary-stu who gets on everybody's fucking nerves.

[edit] Fillers

If the artist is feeling particularly lazy and isn't able to supply the masses with a new page of her comic, but feels the great need to get her enormous zit-infested ass kissed in the mean time, she posts "fillers", which are usually oekaki drawings of her characters involved in sadomasochism.

[edit] Kewl Kids Kollaborate!

Somewhere along the lines, the "populars", mainly Devdasi, a bondage-obsessed tubby with an ass-chin, Kizzy, a pineapple who types and reasons like a mentally retarded gradeschooler, Buttercup_Samurai, another pineapple, also queen of cliches, and Resalan, (who's probably the most decent of all, but still scratch that, they're all fucking the same!) decided they still weren't getting enough attention on the website, to make up for the real world.

So, they started a super-dee-duper club called Yamete! Oshiri Ga Itai! Or in English, "Stop! My Ass Hurts!" Oh, excuse me. Members of this organization are offended when it is deemed club. They consider it a happy collaboration among friends, but it just conveniently has all the artists from the first page in it.

To be popular, all your characters must look the same.
To be popular, all your characters must look the same.

Basically, they get together, turn themselves into twinks, and draw pictures of themselves fucking each other and being cute. There's just one thing you need to remember about Yamete! Don't call them. They'll call you.

[edit] The Aftermath

Somewhere along the lines, a problem arose, which they somehow never predicted because they're fucking dumbass teenagers: EVERYONE wanted to join. And soon, notes were flooding their inboxes, and all the comments were fan's grievances of rejection. I mean WOE IS THEM. IT'S SO DIFFICULT BEING POPULAR, THEY JUST COULDN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. Which resulted in an extremely huge page of bitching, which accompanied a youtube audio recording of total fail, voiced by a satanic chipmunk version of one of the members, (which has now been confirmed to be Kizzy) acting snotty and spewing out shit, as usual. You can listen to this bitch here.

Most comments in response to the bitchfest were more asspats, to which they nodded to and smiled from behind their computer screens. It wasn't until someone named LadyBow had the fucking nerve to point out their faggotry that their true colors were revealed.

HOW DARE YOU.
HOW DARE YOU.
 
 
ur art is fine the way it is ^-^ dont let any one else tell u otherwise darling ^o^ with time and practice, I know that ull be able to blow me out of the water with your art ^-^ *thumbs up* don't give up~! <3
 

 

—Kizzy, lying to one of her fans

After an accusation that they might be oblivious and elitist, they responded with extreme defense and carried on a lengthy fight on another page. Another user named TheFlapper showed up in defense of LadyBow's claims, but to them it only looked like the two were up to no good, and causing trouble in the neighborhood.

She knows exactly what they're goin' through.
She knows exactly what they're goin' through.

Meanwhile, a little brown-noser tried to defend them, but was completely overlooked, because she was supplying them with the same bullshit they knew and loved, instead of questioning their "authority".

THE THOUGHT POLICE HAVE MY BACK.
THE THOUGHT POLICE HAVE MY BACK.

In the end, they proceeded to delete said antagonist's pwnage and left behind self-righteous diatribes for the Smackjeeves staff to evaluate after reporting the offenders for "trolling". However, the staff realized they were elitist cuntrags in denial, and promptly left the scene to spend their time productively.

[edit] Where are they now?

The tards have over 800 fans and probably just have to wait a little longer until they're 18 and old enough to get a sex change. HURRAY FOR SEXY ASS MEN.

AND THEY KNOW ABOUT THIS PAGE. THEY KNOW WHO WROTE IT TOO. OH JESUS CHRIST, THEY CAUGHT ME AND THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY. </masked butthurt> This is Kizzy. She's probably the dullest and least articulate of the whole gang, and the 15-year-old emo she unnecessarily takes a stab at is actually Sixpinkwhiskers, the most popular artist on the website, who was civilized enough to realize Yamete was a piece of shit and quit it. Seriously Kizzy, why are you such a jealous asshole? You suck. Pineapple.

[edit] Smackjeeve's Most Noted Masterpieces

[edit] Love in Weird Places

A boy love written by Cullen-Chan, about a "rebel" and a handicapped kid with the "mental maturity of a 6-year-old". One wonders if Cullen-Chan herself is a retard.

In Cullen-Chan's world, jail looks like an oversized canary cage.
In Cullen-Chan's world, jail looks like an oversized canary cage.
Smackjeeves love emo kids.
Smackjeeves love emo kids.

The story is supposed to be a light-hearted tugger of heartstrings for smackjeevers far and wide, teaching them that even little children in wheelchairs can find someone who wants to fuck them. It follows the life of poor 16-year-old Josh, a hardcore goth/punk who spontaneously decides he has a crush on a cripple-tard named "Joe", despite the fact that it's technically pedophilia. After a couple dates, and Joe bailing Josh out of jail for still ambiguous reasons, Josh's friends manipulate Joe into thinking he needs to brake up with Josh. After he tells him it's over, Josh goes and commits SERIOUS SELF-INJURY, and they go through the usual soap opera shit and end up making out on a hospital bed.

The story has no coherant plot, just gets more and more retarded as it goes. For unknown reasons, Cullen-Chan chooses to produce it with MS Paint, with even less art quality than South Park, (without any of the satire or humor) yet somehow it's reached over 150 fans.

Also, the girl is 15 years old, and probably does excessive drugs with me.

[edit] This Just In!

Cullen-Chan has restarted all her comics. This is now called "A Little Different"! Doesn't it look so much better now?

Cullen-chan has deleted her profile.

Cullen-chan is now Collins, and she's back to doing horribly shitty-ass Paint comics. She has restarted, and is trying to redeem but never will, Love in Weird Places again again, and it's now called Until Your Death Do We Part. And what's this? *gasp*....Joe isn't handicapped anymore? What's this, also? He has hips? Sounds like somebody secretly likes hetero relationships. But she wants to fit in. We understand.

Collins has now re-re-re started that comic of hers. It is now called Who Knew.

[edit] Pika-seme-Chu

No, your eyes don't decieve. Pikachu, smokin' a cigarette.
No, your eyes don't decieve. Pikachu, smokin' a cigarette.

The most fucking pointless and disturbing comic ever, by Yassa. Last Thursday, she came up with the brilliant idea that she should RUIN OUR CHILDHOOD and BUTTRAPE POKEMON by turning select creatures into hot Herbal Essence-haired twinks that immediately try to bed Ash and Misty. And the authoress' reasoning for their transformations was that they got horny enough when they were touching their owner's crotches. Actually, a made-up Pokemon accurately named "Horny" is the one with this magical ability. Anyway, Ash decides to turn his Pikachu human, and for some unknown reason thinks that Pikachu will turn into a hot chick even though he knows that his Pikachu is male. And honestly, even if it had to be male, don't you think he'd be like a fat metrosexual, if anything? But no, he's tall, muscular, and his hair is silkier than Tyra Banks'.

It not only supports beastiality...b-b-but it's just plain wrong. It's wrong.

Do you think about your pets becoming humans so you can have sex with them? If you do, please die.

It's the next Stephen King novel.
It's the next Stephen King novel.

Unfortunately, most Smackejeevers seem to love this work of perversion.


[edit] Memorable quotes

 
 
Let's.. have.. sex
 

 

—Pikachu, being a slut

In any case, one thing is for sure, and that is that this comic needs moar mudkips.

[edit] Idiot's Guide to Passion

"Not your little sister's yaoi" Pssh. This comic is on the scale of Love in Weird Places as far as art goes. The story was sure to gain around 300 fans because it involves gay incest. The comic is apparently rated XXX, but the author is a 15 year old girl. How does this work? Fortunately for everyone, the art is so horrid that you can barely tell the sex scenes apart from any other part of the story.

The story revolves around 15/16 year old "Ismo" who is in love with his brother, (cleverly named "Anil") So much in fact, that he has been having wet dreams about the guy since he was 12. Somewhere in between, he also decided to be a male prostitute because his family is poor.

[edit] Memorable quotes

 
 
I'm a freak. I know he's my brother.... and that I'm a boy.... But I can't help it. I want him. I want him so bad........ it hurts.
 

 

—Ismo, being a freak

[edit] Glass Sharts

Despite their horrible angst, they still have time to buy designer clothes...from a retard-designer.
Despite their horrible angst, they still have time to buy designer clothes...from a retard-designer.
Characters of Glass Hearts have had very large portions of their crotches removed.
Characters of Glass Hearts have had very large portions of their crotches removed.
Penis?
Penis?

Glass Sharts, more commonly known as Glass Hearts (but what’s the difference?) is the tale of two ukes trying to find love in some island off Japan where they evacuated all the faggots.

It’s basically an extremely…painfully…agonizingly lengthy piece of crap that embraces all clichés known to man, and I really suggest you read at your own risk, or you might find yourself pouring bleach into your eyes and screaming bloody murder. For 350 pages, a group of retard gay teenagers have been rambling/thinking about random shit, crying over their troubling childhoods, and trying to get in bed with each other.

The author, Buttercup-Samurai, has deep characters, folks. Her favorite of all is Haiiro Hirashima, and the only way she knows how to give him character is to make him say “fuck” all the time and get hasty in inappropriate situations, even when the guy he “loves” is trying to be nice to him. Seriously, what kind of fucking idiot does that? There's a reason people treat him like shit, including his heartless, faceless, father from the past, who disowned him like any sane person would. He blames himself for it and cries all the time. Good, because it IS YOUR FAULT, and you SHOULD go die and not exist anymore.

As if Haiiro couldn’t be a more retarded character…there is another. The second main character of this shenanigan is a cross-dresser named Makoto Kawahoshi (which means Makoto River-Star) who wears mary-janes and flowery dresses. Oh, and weird looking suspender-shorts things that’re tight enough to show a package, but either he really doesn’t have a penis and has been a girl all along (wouldn’t be surprised), or he’s got that thing so deeply tucked into his buttcrack that he’s giving himself anal. Buttercup Samurai also takes pride in the fact that whenever she draws him, people think he’s a girl. Oh, and did we also mention that his parents died in a car crash and he was raped by someone he knew as a kid? There. We saved you 300+ pages of bullshit.

Like Haiiro, Makoto also gets laid by some popular hot-shit upperclassman, named Reizo. Because we all know, feisty buttholes with emotional baggage is where it’s at when you want a real, mature, relationship and you’re cool enough to have anybody.

There’s also a cast of other friends that are all gay or at least bi, and not a one with hair above their shoulders… Recently Buttercup Samurai established a new character named Naoto that’s *gasp* straight, or something. I hope his parents know they’re sending him to an all boys school filled with gays. I smell gang-rape.

[edit] This Just In

1. Buttercup-Samurai has changed her name in order to hide herself from ED and erase the FAIL of the past. What a fucking idiot, thinking she can hide from us. Her new name is The Star Samurai.
2. The Star Samurai is restarting this fag-fest! One can rightfully assume the decision spawned from the self-hate caused by this article. Now we can all look forward to an amazing new version of this tale, with better art, but the usual shit story-telling. Link coming February 2008. Until then, you can still read the whole version 1 here.
3. In order to counter this ED article, it was discovered that The Star Samurai wrote HER OWN ARTICLE, as well as articles about her stories, on a professional comic wiki. Seriously, who does that.

[edit] Bother Her

--Her new Smackjeeves profile.
--Buttercup-Samurai @ Deviant Art
--The Star Samurai @ Deviant Art
--Her LJ, where she so clearly is a crazy mofo artist, it's not even funny.

[edit] Romeo and Julius

I really did read it all. And it's horrible.
I really did read it all. And it's horrible.

Lacking reasonable plot development and buttraping a mediocre Shakespeare play, I present to you Romeo and Julius, a drive-through romance by MrJonesSoda about two boys that look exactly the same as each other, falling in love in fifteen seconds. Written with all the quality of a sitcom due the next morning for a surefire spot on ABC Family, this comic is………word.

Brandan and Zach are two identical twinks with emo haircuts that suddenly fall in love with each other and realize they’re gay, all in the span of a single song at a high school dance that has really sappy lyrics. Some hypothesize that it was originally a Japanese song the authoress liked and got faulty translations for on AnimeLyrics.com. Once the dance is over, they spend their time fantasizing and trying to meet each other, all the while caught up in a fast, survival of the fittest world of unreasonably angry cousins and EXTREMELY CATHOLIC parents that would so kill their own children if they found out they liked other guys’ weenies.

I can’t even call it a piece of shit. With the others, it really WAS just bad and something you should never read. But this comic…was a clusterfuck of fail to the point where it should be read. It’ll make your day, I promise.


[edit] Memorable quotes

-Well well, Zach. Now where have you been?
-I…had to use the bathroom!
-But I saw you dancing with Brandan. You must have done something with him afterwards.
-…Oh…Alright… While I was dancing with Brandan…I fell in love with him. Then I went into the hall and I…kissed him.

 
 
Wow. He’s…so…beautiful. Wait! Did I just say that about another boy?
 

 

—Brandan, realizing he’s gay for teh FIRST TIME.

 
 
You didn’t even think about how your parents will feel about this! You know how Christian they are!
 

 

—Zach’s nearsighted cousin, being a generalizing fuck-anus.

 
 
My hatred for Brandan…burns with the intensity of a thousand suns.
 

 

—Zach’s nearsighted cousin, parodying quotes from The Fairly Oddparents.

 
 
If I ever see you with him again… I’ll tell your parents about you being gay! They might even disown you!
 

 

—Holy fuck.

 
 
Woah, hold on! Are you admitting to us that you just turned gay!
 

 

—Brandan’s retard friend, treating homosexuality like it’s a contracted virus.

 
 
His eyes sparkle like the stars! His lips…so delicate… How he leans his cheek on his hand! Oh, that I were a glove upon that hand, that I might touch that cheek.
 

 

—MrJonesSoda, severely fa-…being a……….sucking bad.

 
 
My personal opinion? I think homosexuals should all go to hell.
 

 

—Brandan’s mother, who’s hopefully going to hell herself where a bunch of actually wrong-doing homosexuals will gnaw at her flesh for an eternity.

 
 
And…this is a public place… People practice baseball here.
 

 

—Zach, trying to stop Brandan from going down on him.


If I may milk The Fairly Oddparents for all it’s worth… they don’t even need coats. At the rate they’re lovin’, and fightin’, and having deep feelings, the friction will keep them warm. The only thing one can hope is that their deaths come as fast as the sex.

Reaction to this Article

Yaoi doesn't need a plot.
Yaoi doesn't need a plot.

Like expected, the butthurt douche decided to post it on her comic for some nice hug-boxing action, knowing all along that tons of smacktards would encourage her not to stop sucking.

MrJonesSoda's shameless fetishism.
MrJonesSoda's shameless fetishism.
when moar gay is needed
when moar gay is needed

[edit] Vampire Valchrist

MrJonesSoda strikes again.
Vampire Valchrist is a lovely, beautiful, deep story about a douchey emo kid with no personality who is uprooted from his life as a rich-girl-fucking orphan by some stranger in a cape that bursts through their bedroom window. This stranger turns out to be a "vampire", with a meal plan so sloppily thrown together a boy scout with happy meal binoculars could track him down. Despite everything else on his agenda being wreckless and 'tarded, he succumbs to negociation when the soon-to-be-fag intervenes. Then he pulls out a super-duper "vampire contract" which binds the kid to him as a permanant blood and fuck source. But oh no. He doesn't become a terrified-for-his-life, physically and emotionally drained basketcase now that his life has an expiration date. He's not even much bothered by the fact that some vampire guy he met last thursday is fucking him up the recently-virgin butthole every night in some fancy joint at the end of the block that probably sticks out like Edward Scissorhands' castle. He's more curious about pointless shit like whether or not this new predator will show up in the mirror, or if he has any family around. (Which he does. Some fucking cliche sister that, yes, has enough common sense to see his chosen path is PA-THE-TIC, but...she just sucks. The end.)

Anyway, they eat Cocoa Puffs in a modern looking kitchen and the emo kid explains how his parents dissapeared, not just from the story, but also from the author's train of thought since it was too complicated an idea to work out for her fuckfest. BL doesn't need a plot. Remember? Parents? Pffff. They just get in the way. Seriously, gaiz, where the fuck do all the parents go?? I thought there would be incest D:

Once he realizes his blood, and prostate, are being used up, he makes up the shittiest excuse ever for his group of gay/emo friends: that he is dying of a malignant brain tumor, but will try to come to school despite symptoms of narcolepsy and tuberculosis.

And you guessed it. He just SUDDENLY becames gay as springtime for this vampire, who, like many of the author's characters, pretty much looks like somebody in his immediate family (hmm, COULD be Incest....). I-I-It could happen to anybody.

"Oh no you don't!!!"
"Sheesh, what's your problem?"
"You're the problem! I promised I will protect Megan. And so, I will."
"Hey, I'm a vampire, and I need to eat."

[edit] Antares

Apparently Antares is a very popular artist, seemingly talented despite being an arrogant cuntrag, who STEALS character designs. Please refer to user below for details:

First we see a character that seems to have identity problems named…Hearts. HE is your stereotypical transvestite with pink hair that Antares seems pretty proud of. Seeing as how she worked OH SO HARD on making his FABULOUS design. Oh! But wait! What’s this? He looks a bit…familiar. That's right folks, this little pineapple seems to have has inspiration….okay, its not even funny, Lets just say she copied, like al stereotypical otaku, this design. As we see from this picture, Her “original” character seems to have a twin sister, or…who knows, its probably a man in disguise! Anyway, all she seemed to do was give this girl a haircut and BAM! Its now a transvestite name Hearts. Honestly Antares? You think no one would notice your little secret? Well, seeing as how this pictures isn’t one someone would normally come across, that little shit probably thought that no one would EVER find out.


Details you say? Okay, I’ll give them to you. As you can see, they both have the same hair, the same hair accessories, the same rose---oh wait, she moved the rose tattoo on the girls chest into a REAL rose connected NEAR his chest and onto the outfit. C-L-E-V-E-R! And look at those colors, I guess she thought that by making the colors THICKER would make the dress a completely new outfit. Well played you little bugger. Ah, even the eye color is similar…naaah, she totally came up with that herself. Since his name IS Hearts, she figured that the eyes would represent that color….OBVIOUSLY. Also…making the cross-bands in front thinner? Brilliant. And look at those frills on the bottom of that dress, aah, I guess since its not see through, showing his “manly” parts, it totally throws us of. Oh? What’s this? Black gloves? Oh! That TOTALLY makes him look as different and unrecognizable as Sailor moon WITHOUT her tiara.

This is yet another…fanart the Nitro+ © company has done of Antares’(right) artwork. Because she clearly couldn’t have copied this one. Can’t you tell? She made the weather a bit more cheery by adding a few less rain drops! Good Antares, thank you for not totally copying that background. But the color scheme and…everything else…says a different story. Seriously? Is no ones really going to notice THIS little masterpiece? You could have at least made them in a different setting…like…in a sunny field? This is like a Jenny Craig picture on crack. Before, and after—more like Professional and utter shit. How can you even think of this as, dare I say it—original? Allan Walker, or whoever’s jacket her character stole…must be pretty pissed. There’s not even much I can say about this plagiarized picture. Just look at it. If you're going to steal stuff...dont just steal from one company, be original and steal from all of them. Tip 101.



Oh~ But thats not all, there are a few more goodies here for all of you kiddies to look at.


In conclusion, Nitro Plus has obviously copied ALL of Antares’ original character designs. Nitro+! How could you?

Here are the official websites for Antares' theft sources.
~http://www.nitroplus.co.jp/pc/ (Just look around.)
~http://www.clubhobi.net/expage/gekko/index.php?cha=2&ph=0
~http://www.nitroplus.co.jp/pc/lineup/into_14/index.php
~http://www.nitroplus.co.jp/pc/lineup/into_11/chara.html
~http://www.demonbane.com/special/
~http://www.nitroplus.co.jp/pc/lineup/into_14/chara11.html
~http://www.ntv.co.jp/neuro/ Yako's father was murdered in a locked room. She then meets a man named Neuro Nougami who is a demon from Hell who eats "riddles." He forces Yako to act as a detective so he can solve mysteries. Neuro longs to eat the ultimate mystery. Wow, sounds so familiar.

[edit] This Just In

Antares has fled the scene. As a very active artist and *choke*, popular... on Smackjeeves, she has deleted her DA gallery and the comics that most gave her name (now known to be undeserved) glory are unable to be viewed. She has this to say:

 
 
I had a talk with a family member, and it's about time I get my life together. I'm wasting away on the pc and there's no reason for it, as I will get nothing out of it except an unhealthy lifestyle. : \ .......

....... So I'm getting rid of everything. Cleaning my computer up. Getting rid of my deviantart account, getting rid of my smackjeeves account, changing IM names (for close people and family only), and changing emails.)
 


 

—Antares, excusing her frantic clean-up of the evidence.

[edit] HOW TO MAKE A POPULAR SMACKJEEVES COMIC


If you can't draw shit for your life, but you want to get popular, here's a quick way to BE JUS LIEK THE POPULAR SMACKFAGZ. (Guaranteed to keep you on the hot list for a good week or two.)

- It's gotta be animu.
- Yaoi, shounen-ai, BL; all that shit. Don't bother with yuri or shoujo-ai, they never get popular.
- Also, if it's emo/gothic, you'll get double the fans.
- Don't forget to make a banner showing off parts of the pictures where your characters are raping each other.
- IT'S OKAY IF ALL YOUR CHARACTERS LOOK THE SAME. (See Heart : Sanctuary)
- The men HAVE to look like girls. (Or dress like one.)
- Plot is unnecessary. It just gets in the way.
- Angst is a must, it makes your character more emo.
- Make a re-make of "Alice in the Wonderland" except change the name to Alex, and make it boy love/yaoi. And emo.
- Make a cheap rip-off of Pika-Seme-Chu. It'll make people have an orgy, since the orginal author Yassa never updates anyway.
- Since half the population of Smackjeeves are emofags who cut themselves nightly to sleep (if they can cut through all the fat), gore and blood will also get you attention. BECAUSE THEY CAN CONNECT.
- Cover your pages in tones. Lots and lots of grey tones. Art that fails turns into win if you can't see it.
- If you can, add KAWAII neko ears to your characters. Srsly. [1]
- Girls don't exist in your manga.
- Straight don't exist in your manga.
- ????
- PROFIT!


Above all else, your popular webmanga should have lots of penis, semen, and sex. If you take all of these and make them into one super cliche comic, the Smack Jeeves community will applaud for you.

[edit] SPRITE FAGS

[edit] Admins want to KEEL ALL SPRITERS

Recently Smackjeeves have been planning genocide on everyone who creates or like sprite comics. Also they seem to have convinced every shit comic / manga artist to hate on spriters. Lets begin with how it all started. Some eight year old sonic sprite comic author posted the crappiest comic series you could possibly imagine called Sonic Vs Nazo or some shit. A bunch of spriters started to flame the comic (After giving over 9000 posts of constructive critism that the author refused to listen to) and got INSTANTLY BANNED! ZOMG ZOMG ZOMG! Smackjeeves Admin whom everyone loves, Cutething began banning random spriters and using flaming as an excuse to ban. Knowing all too well that every spriter and their fucking DOG would hate her for it. So now the other admin... Admin. That's his username, no srsly, posted in the news that if any spriter steps out of line, he will start a spritercaust and will ban all the je-spriters! Then a thread started in general discussion as the administrators try to convince everyone who thinks they're wrong that they're 'complete dumbasses' and their kissass yaoi shoujo loving faggot mangaka's back them up by using 4chan terms and calling all spriters 12 year olds. No srsly. [2]

[edit] Dark the Ninja

Recently, Dark the Ninja, one of the most insuferable people alive who can't tell the word "Made" from the word "may" has posted a picture of himself in real life. Yes, he was wearing a ninja cloak. Dark is a one of a kind faggot, thinking he's a ninja and shit. He steals and its pretty funny, but still, Dark has no grammar skills. An example of a translation from a normal sentance (Hello, may I ask you what your name is?) to Dark speak (Helo, made me ask yur name what is?). He constantly acts like he's the best spriter around, and is super cocky. Recently theres been complaints about him, mostly with his "pillow shading", the nerd's way of saying shading without a source.

Dark the ninja IRL. Ya rly.
Dark the ninja IRL. Ya rly.

[edit] WAYS TO TROLL DARK THE NINJA

Tell him that he's a great spriter, then tell him his sprites are pillow shitted. Continue to constantly repeat "MADE I JOIN?!" in front of him, and also tell him that pirates beat ninjas.

[edit] The Kyo Saga

It all started back last thursday, back when Smackjeeves was not completely full of yaoi loving, bi-sexual, dick sucks. Kyo was one of the few senior members who seemed to be appalled by the cancerous influx of yaoi and furfags. He then, in a lulzy fashion, proceeded to begin a campaign of trolling against the weaboo teenage girls; which he received a four week ban for [3]. This is when things turned ugly. Kyo then began to fill his time by going over to the rival comic host Drunk Duck and entered their admin account through an XSS exploit on the site. He defaced the site writing newsposts praising other webcomic hosts, including smackjeeves and put images reading "Kyo haxx0r'd your soup" all over the site. Repercussions from Smackjeeves were swift after a thread was made in the forums, some praised him and some denounced him. Cutething, the local bitch, decided to release propaganda through her fascist newspaper Smack Talk, the permaban hammer was dropped, and Kyo was expelled from the forums. But this was not the end of Kyo's story, he continued to host his comic on Smackjeeves. About a year later, another senior member, Gibson Twist threatened to leave if Kyo wasn't banned from the actual site as well, because he was so outraged over the defacement of Drunk Duck that happened almost a year ago. The Smackjeeves admin permabanned Kyo from the website entire website, because he did not want to lose Gibson Twist's awesome comic [4].


[edit] SmackJeeves Hatred of ED

For this many members of Smackjeeves hate ED for the following reason

 
 
They probably made alot of teenage girls cry with their assault on us.)


 


 

—A smackjeeves user

For a day or two Smackjeeves had a news post informing the users that ED had an article on them and to not do anything about it, which was promptly ignored by the Smackjeeves forum members. One of their users came in and deleted the entire page claiming it was "for the lulz." Luckily one of our gracious admins banned the newfag and restored this page to its former glory.

 
 
That wasn't funny, it was bitchy, I mean come on, how hard is it to make fun of these people?
 

 

—Nicholas a smackjeeves user who made love to a bottle of beer

Moar to come.

[edit] See Also

[edit] People Who've Tried and FAILED to Sabotage This Page and Should be Harassed Incessantly

[edit] External Links

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