Smackjeeves

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

Jump to: navigation, search

A typical smackjeeves genius image.
A typical smackjeeves user.
A typical Smackjeeves comment.
Smackjeeves, in short.



Smackjeeves is an online comic community infested by pre-teen yaoi-obsessed closeted-dykes and spritefags who are only capable of recoloring sprites. Almost everything you find here is the same regurgitated boy-love story with the formula "uke that looks like a girl + angst x seme that looks like a girl + no plot= KAWAII", or sprite based author comics revolving around 11 year old fags who couldn't use MS Paint to save their life. Most of the authors here think if they work hard enough, they'll some day get published by some popular comic industry in Japan, but fail to realize if they were to walk into any sort of organization, they would leave it with their opus shoved up their asshole. Also, the Smackjeeves servers go down more times than a hooker on a Christmas eve.


Contents

Kewl Kids Kollaboration!

Somewhere along the line, the "populars", mainly Devdasi, a bondage-obsessed tubby with poor hygiene, Kizzy, who types and reasons like a preschooler, Buttercup_Samurai, queen of cliches, and Resalan, who draws the same generic fem-boys over and over again, decided they still weren't getting enough attention on the website, to make up for the real world.

So, they started a super-dee-duper club called Yamete! Oshiri Ga Itai! Or in English, "Stop! My Ass Hurts!" Oh, excuse me. Members of this organization are offended when it is deemed club. They consider it a happy collaboration among friends, but it just conveniently has all the artists from the first page in it.

THE THOUGHT POLICE HAVE MY BACK.

Basically, they get together, turn themselves into oversexed twinks, and draw themselves fucking each other and being cute, because that's totally what friends do! There's just one thing you need to remember about Yamete! Don't call them. They'll call you.

The Aftermath

Somewhere along the lines, a problem arose, which they somehow never predicted because they lack hindsight: EVERYONE wanted to join. And soon, notes were flooding their inboxes, and all the comments were fan's grievances of rejection. I mean WOE IS THEM. IT'S SO DIFFICULT BEING POPULAR, THEY JUST COULDN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. Which resulted in an extremely huge page of bellyaching, which accompanied a YouTube audio recording of total fail, voiced by a satanic chipmunk version of one of the members, (which has now been confirmed to be Kizzy) acting snotty and spewing out shit, as usual. You can listen to the whine-fest here.

Most comments in response to their collected bitching were more asspats, to which they nodded to and smiled from behind their computer screens. It wasn't until LadyBow had the fucking nerve to point out their faggotry that their true colors were revealed.

HOW DARE YOU.
 
 
ur art is fine the way it is ^-^ dont let any one else tell u otherwise darling ^o^ with time and practice, I know that ull be able to blow me out of the water with your art ^-^ *thumbs up* don't give up~! <3
 

 

—Kizzy, lying to one of her fans

After an accusation that they might be oblivious and elitist, they responded with extreme defense and carried on a lengthy fight on another page. Another user named TheFlapper showed up in defense of LadyBow's claims, but to them it only looked like the two were up to no good, and causing trouble in the neighborhood.

She knows exactly what they're goin' through.

Meanwhile, a little brown-noser tried to defend them, but was completely overlooked, because she was supplying them with the same bullshit they knew and loved, instead of questioning their "authority".

In the end, they proceeded to delete said antagonist's pwnage and left behind self-righteous diatribes for the Smackjeeves staff to evaluate after reporting the offenders for "trolling". However, the staff realized they were elitist cuntrags in denial, and promptly left the scene to spend their time productively.

Where are they now?

The ladies have over 800 fans and probably just have to wait a little longer until they're 18 and old enough to get a sex change. HURRAY FOR SEXY ASS MEN. Spoilers: Most of them are over 18. Hell, a few of them are over 20.

AND THEY KNOW ABOUT THIS PAGE. THEY KNOW WHO WROTE IT TOO. OH JESUS CHRIST, THEY CAUGHT ME AND THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY. </masked butthurt> This is Kizzy, she's the dullest and least articulate of the whole gang, and the 16-year-old she blindly takes a stab at is actually Sixpinkwhiskers, the most popular artist on the website, who was smart enough to realize Yamete was a giant circle jerk and quit it. Kizzy totally isn't bitter at all!

Smackjeeve's Most Noted Masterpieces

Puppy Love

What do you get when you put yaoi, anthros, and pseudo-Japanese names together? Yet ANOTHER cliché BL manga, written by Kumi Pumi. The story starts off with Kanoe dreaming about his best friend, Makoi, humping a pillow [Yes a PILLOW. Nothing else is there.] and then he begins to jack off on some censored porn, which he found boring. So in order to find more entertainment, he turned to a picture of his best friend in his swimming trunks and jacked off to him instead. Then after going to a karaoke bar and singing "happy" songs together, blah blah blah, the two best friends are left alone. And yes, Kanoe does rape him. Despite chasing Kanoe out of the room, traumatized about being raped by his best friend, he secretly liked it. For all we know, Kumi Pumi pulled a JonesSoda. Meaning that Makoi suddenly realized he was gay.

However, due to the amazing population of stupidity that SmackJeeves cultivates, this comic shot up to the front page of the most popular comics with over 1000 fans. Though the fans say they faved it for the amazing artwork, we all know they did it for fun. This comic even suggests incest.

 
 
I'd totally tap that if it wasn't my brother!
 

 

—Kanoe's sister commenting on her own brother. Yes, that's a perfectly normal thing to say

You can tell Kumi Pumi is a lonely person, like the majority of SmackJeevers, you should drop by and say hi.

Critique Control

Making webcomics is serious business, and like many of the Smackjeeves Popularz who want to GROW UP TO BE THE WORLDS BESTEST EVAR MANGAKA, kumi-pumi is very accepting of the occasional critiques received upon her comic amidst all the fangirlish squeels, so that she may gradually improve her work and better herself as an artist. She doesn't mind when she receives comments which are less than praiseful. In the event she receives a message telling her that there's something she might need to improve on, she takes it in good grace... Oh wait, mea culpa, there AREN'T any of those messages. I'm sure they were here yesterday. They all mysteriously vanished!

But never fear kumi-pumi! In case you were fretting and missing them, they will be right here.

 
 
I can't even begin to describe all of the things that are wrong with this picture :l

Just thought I'd let you know. You know, that it sucks. But I like the soft coloring style, sort of draws attention away from the lack of proper anatomy.
 


 

—Why did this go? It's not exactly OMG I LOVE YOU but it's kind enough to let her know that at least she's good at giving worship-seeking shit pretty colours.

 
 
To the fangirls over there: Don't you think all your 'OMG I WANNA RAPE HIM' are a bit too much? He's not even that well drawn and he looks like he would rather be in real clothes rather than those BDSM collars. And 'rape him', seriously?....

Anyway. I don't like how you drew the nipples (because I've seen girls in porno comics who have them, and it's so more of girly nipples than manly nipples.), nor the way his crotch is prominent (and his pants look like a diaper, just so you know). And for God's sake, his look is NOT cute! He seems rather like he could just cry. Yes, I know some fangirls enjoy this kind of look for the boy-bottom, but right know it isn't accorded at all with his pose. Nevertheless, I like the ribbons and your choice of colours (acid green instead of grass green). The composition in itself looks quite good too.


(It may seem like I'm a bit harsh, but I'm not at all. Sorry if you're under that impression. It's just that pointing mistakes it's a better way not to look like a fangirl who's doing nothing but 'squeeee'-ing all the time. And sorry for the bad choice of vocabulary and/or grammatical structures, but English isn't my first language.)

 


 

—Nope, doesn't matter that your comment is applicable and 100% true; if it isn't pure ass-licking adoration it disappears.

Strange that they should vanish, it's all for the best. After all, room must be kept for the more legitimate and intelligent comments.

 
 
O-M-G! I CAN SEE HIS.... OMG His cute >//o//< MOOOOOORE MOOOOOOOOOOOOORE update ^^~<3 loool

OMG I CAN SE HIS NUTS!! X/////////////X.
 


 

—Funny how this one that followed the other two managed to escape the comment vanishing act. It couldn't have been considered more valid? Must be one of life's little mysteries.

This is the piece in question. If you're going to leave a message take extra care and strip all reason and intelligence from your comment first... The Smackjeeves Popular is a precious little thing after all, and hinting the idea that the whole world doesnt fucking love them can be very damaging.

Rebel Prince

An older comic on this site, it managed to jump up the the second most popular after "Puppy Love", thus it deserves to be mentioned. It is (poorly) written and drawn by -BBH-, another member of the "collaboration".

"Rebel Prince" is essentially the theme that Kumi Pumi ripped off to make Puppy Love. The story is of Bo, a midget sheep who meets a cat named "AK", which stands for "Apple Kitten" (Yes, the names are all like this ) when he gets hit by a car/adopted by Bo's owner. Now, here comes the weird part, in scenes where humans aren't present, the animals are drawn as HOT FAGGOT BISHIES WITH ANIMAL EARS. Speaking of faggotry, everyone in this story seems to be gay from the start. In that sense, it's a little different than some of other BL comics on Smackjeeves. The fact that while most have too much forced conflict, this story has little to none.

Anyway, things really heat up, when Ike the raccoon shows up to be the only source of conflict in the story so far. He, too, loves Bo, and is jealous of the intruder, AK. This doesn't amount to much, Ike eventually seems to disappear from the story.

And things heat up again when Bo discovers that AK is *GASP* a prostitute. But that doesn't amount to much, either, because he quickly forgives him and they go on to have buttsex. Who would have predicted THAT?

After the sex, Bo does the typical bitch thing and talks about his life story.

It might also be interesting to note that Bo has a pretty much IDENTICAL personality to Kumi Pumi's Makoi, that AK and Kanoe are both supposed to be seme cats. I know there isn't a lot of originality when you're writing about gay furry "love", but come on, Kumi Pumi should use what little brain she has to fart out something less derivative.

 
 
I've come to realize that SmackJeeves is a mostly boy -love comic site.
 

 

— -BBH- Finally realizing what everyone else has already noticed.

 
 
I try to strive and make Rebel Prince not as...predictable and I hope that I've done just that.
 

 

— -BBH-, wishful thinking.

Pika-seme-Chu

No, your eyes don't deceive. Pikachu, smokin' a cigarette.

The most pointless and disturbing comic ever, by Yassa. She came up with the brilliant idea that she should RUIN EVERYONE'S CHILDHOOD and BUTTRAPE POKEMON by turning select creatures into hot Herbal Essence-haired twinks that immediately try to bed Ash and Misty. And the authoress' reasoning for their transformations was that they got horny enough when they were touching their owner's crotches. Actually, a made-up Pokemon accurately named "Horny" is the one with this magical ability. Anyway, Ash decides to turn his Pikachu human, and for some unknown reason thinks that Pikachu will turn into a hot chick even though he knows that his Pikachu is male. Honestly, wouldn't it be more likely that he'd turn into a fat metrosexual? But no, he's tall, muscular, and has hair silkier than Tyra Banks'.

Do you fantasize about your pets becoming humans so you can have sex with them? If you do, please consider this option.

Unfortunately, most Smackejeevers seem to love this work of perversion.

It's the next Stephen King novel.
 
 
Let's.. have.. sex
 

 

—Pikachu, being a slut

One thing is for sure, this comic needs moar mudkips.

Idiot's Guide to Passion

"Not your little sister's yaoi" Pssh. This comic is on the scale of Love in Weird Places as far as art goes. The story was sure to gain around 300 fans because it involves gay incest. The comic is apparently rated XXX, but the author is a 15 year old girl. How does this work? Fortunately for everyone, the art is so horrid that you can barely tell the sex scenes apart from any other part of the story.

The story revolves around 15/16 year old "Ismo" who is in love with his brother, cleverly named "Anil". So much in fact, that he has been having wet dreams about the guy since he was 12. Somewhere in between, he also decided to be a male prostitute because his family is poor.

 
 
I'm a freak. I know he's my brother.... and that I'm a boy.... But I can't help it. I want him. I want him so bad........ it hurts.
 

 

—Ismo, being a well adjusted young man

Glass Farts

Despite their horrible angst, they still have time to buy designer clothes...from a retard-designer.
Characters of Glass Hearts have had very large portions of their crotches removed.

More commonly known as Glass Hearts, this is the tale of two cock sluts trying to find love in some island off of Japan where they evacuated all the invalids.

It’s basically a painfully lengthy piece of crap that embraces all clichés known to man, and I really suggest you read at your own risk, or you might find yourself pouring bleach into your eyes and screaming bloody murder. For 350 pages, a group of gay teenagers have been rambling/thinking about random shit, crying over their troubled childhoods, and trying to get in bed with each other.

The author, Buttercup-Samurai, has created some deep characters. Her favorite of all is Haiiro Hirashima, and the only way she knows how to give him character is to make him say “fuck” all the time and get hasty in inappropriate situations, even when the guy he “loves” is trying to be nice to him. Seriously, what kind of idiot does that? There's a reason people treat him like shit, including his heartless, faceless, father from the past, who disowned him like any sane person would. He blames himself for it and cries all the time.

As if Haiiro wasn't enough of a poorly developed character, there's another. The second main character of this catastrophe is a cross-dresser named Makoto Kawahoshi (which means Makoto River-Star) who wears mary-janes and flowery dresses. Oh, and weird looking suspender-shorts things that are tight enough to show a package, but either he lacks a penis and has been a girl all along (wouldn’t be surprised). Buttercup Samurai also takes pride in the fact that whenever she draws him, people think he’s a girl. And did we also mention that his parents died in a car crash and he was raped by someone he knew as a kid? There, we saved you 300+ pages of bullshit and hours of your time.

Like Haiiro, Makoto also gets laid by some popular upperclassman, named Reizo. Because we all know, feisty buttholes with emotional baggage are where it’s at when you want a real, mature relationship and you’re cool enough to have anybody.

Filled with an all-star cast friends who are all gay or at least bi, and not a one with hair above their shoulders. Recently Buttercup Samurai established a new character named Naoto that’s *gasp* straight, or something. I hope his parents know they’re sending him to an all boys school filled with gays. I smell gang-rape.

This Just In

  1. Buttercup-Samurai has changed her name in order to hide herself from ED and erase the FAIL of the past. What a fucking idiot, thinking she can hide from us. Her new name is The Star Samurai.
  2. The Star Samurai is restarting this fag-fest! One can rightfully assume the decision spawned from the self-hate caused by this article. Now we can all look forward to an amazing new version of this tale, with moderately better art, but the usual mediocre story-telling. Link coming February 2008. Until then, you can still read the whole version 1 here.
  3. In order to counter this ED article, it was discovered that The Star Samurai wrote HER OWN ARTICLE, as well as articles about her stories, on a professional comic wiki. Seriously, who does that.

Bother Her

Romeo and Julius

I really did read it all. And it's horrible.

Lacking reasonable plot development and buttraping a mediocre Shakespeare play, I present to you Romeo and Julius, a drive-through romance by MrJonesSoda about two boys who look exactly the same falling in love about fifteen seconds after they meet. Written with all the quality of a sitcom due the next morning for a surefire spot on ABC Family, this comic is the most run-of-the mill you could find on Smackjeeves.

Brandan and Zach are two identical twinks with emo haircuts who suddenly fall in love with each other and realize they’re gay, all in the span of a single song at a high school dance that has incredibly sappy lyrics. Some hypothesize that it was originally a Japanese song MrJonesSoda liked and got faulty translations for on AnimeLyrics.com. Once the dance is over, they spend their time fantasizing and trying to meet each other, all the while caught up in a fast, survival of the fittest world of unreasonably angry cousins and EXTREMELY CATHOLIC parents that would so kill their own children if they found out they liked other guys’ weenies.

Of all the shoddy BL comics posted to Smackjeeves, Romeo and Julius was one of the worst. It was a clusterfuck of fail to the point where it made the Bush Administration look coherent.


Memorable Quotes

 
 
My hatred for Brandan…burns with the intensity of a thousand suns.
 

 

—Zach’s nearsighted cousin, quoting from "The Taming of the Shrew",though it's a safe to say that the artist probably doesn't realize this.

 
 
Woah, hold on! Are you admitting to us that you just turned gay!
 

 

—Brandan’s retard friend, treating homosexuality like it’s a contracted virus.

 
 
His eyes sparkle like the stars! His lips…so delicate… How he leans his cheek on his hand! Oh, that I were a glove upon that hand, that I might touch that cheek.
 

 

—A child in a remedial English class could write better than MrJonesSoda.

 
 
My personal opinion? I think homosexuals should all go to hell.
 

 

—Brandan’s mother, who’s hopefully going to hell herself where a bunch of actually wrong-doing homosexuals will gnaw at her flesh for an eternity.

Yaoi doesn't need a plot.

Reaction to this Article
Like expected, the butthurt douche decided to post it on her comic for some nice hug-boxing action, knowing all along that tons of smacktards would encourage her not to stop sucking.

MrJonesSoda's shameless fetishism.

Vampire Valchrist

MrJonesSoda strikes again.
Vampire Valchrist is a lovely, beautiful, deep story about a douchey emo kid with no personality who is uprooted from his life as a rich-girl-fucking orphan by some stranger in a cape that bursts through their bedroom window. This stranger turns out to be a "vampire", with a meal plan so sloppily thrown together a boy scout with happy meal binoculars could track him down. Despite everything else on his agenda being reckless and ludicrous, he succumbs to negotiation when the soon-to-be-fag intervenes. Then he pulls out a deus ex machina "vampire contract" which binds the kid to him as a permanant blood and fuck source. But oh no, he doesn't become a terrified-for-his-life, physically and emotionally drained basketcase now that his life has an expiration date. He's not even much bothered by the fact that some vampire guy he met last thursday is fucking him up the recently-virgin butthole every night in some fancy joint at the end of the block that probably sticks out like Edward Scissorhands' castle. He's more curious about pointless shit like whether or not this new predator will show up in the mirror, or if he has any family around. (Which he does. Some cliche sister that has enough common sense to see his chosen path is pathetic.)

So cliche, she thinks others are stealing her ideas!

While eating Cocoa Puffs in a modern looking kitchen, the kid explains how his parents disappeared, not just from the story, but also from the author's train of thought since it was too complicated an idea to work out for her fuckfest. BL doesn't need a plot, remember? Parents? Pffff. They just get in the way. Seriously, where the fuck do all the parents go?

Once he realizes his blood and prostate are being used up, he concocts the shittiest excuse ever for his group of fellow gay/emo friends: that he is dying of a malignant brain tumor, but will try to come to school despite symptoms of narcolepsy and tuberculosis.

And you guessed it. He just SUDDENLY becomes gay as springtime for this vampire, who, like many of the author's characters, looks like somebody in his immediate family.

Antares

Antares was a very popular artist, despite her shortcomings. She seemed talented, but in fact STOLE character designs. Please refer to the below for details:

First, we see a character that seems to have identity problems named Hearts. HE is your stereotypical transvestite with pink hair that Antares was pretty proud of. Seeing as how she worked OH SO HARD on making his FABULOUS design -- Oh! But wait! He looks a bit familiar.

That's right folks, this hack seems to have had insperation. Like all stereotypical otaku, she copied a better design, as we see from this picture on the right. All she seemed to do was give this girl a haircut and a beating with the fugly stick. And thanks to her kawaii desu animu style, she's now a transvestite named Hearts. Antares thought no one would notice her little secret. Seeing as how this pictures isn’t one you would normally come across, the arrogant cunt probably thought that no one would EVER find out.

Look at those colors. I guess she thought that by making the reds darker would make the dress a completely new outfit. Even the eye color is almost identical. Naaah! She totally came up with it herself!!1!1 Since his name IS Hearts, she figured that his eyes would represent that color, which is really unoriginal itself. Also, making the cross-bands in front thinner does not make the design yours. And look at those frills on the bottom of that dress. But it's not transparent! Therefore, it is IMMEDIATELY ORIGINAL, GUIZE -- Oh? What’s this? Black gloves? Oh! That TOTALLY makes him look as different and unrecognizable as Sailor Moon WITHOUT her tiara.


But that's not all! There are a few more goodies here for all of you kiddies to look at.


Obviously Nitro+ copied ALL of Antares’ original character designs. Nitro+! How could you?

Here are the official websites Antares stole from.

This Just In

Antares has fled the scene. As a very active and popular artist on Smackjeeves, she has deleted her deviantART gallery and the comics that most gave her name and undeserved glory are unable to be viewed. She has this to say:

 
 
I had a talk with a family member, and it's about time I get my life together. I'm wasting away on the pc and there's no reason for it, as I will get nothing out of it except an unhealthy lifestyle. : \ .......

....... So I'm getting rid of everything. Cleaning my computer up. Getting rid of my deviantart account, getting rid of my smackjeeves account, changing IM names (for close people and family only), and changing emails.)
 


 

—Antares, excusing her frantic clean-up of the evidence. Or maybe she's finally stepping up from being a sack of crap.

Thank.Fucking.God

HOW TO MAKE A POPULAR SMACKJEEVES COMIC

Emos all have the same greasy hairstyle.
Beating and raping little boys is a good way to get fans.

If you can't draw shit for your life, but you want to get popular, here's a quick way to BE JUS LIEK THE POPULAR SMACKFAGZ. (Guaranteed to keep you on the hot list for a good few weeks.)

- It's gotta be animu.
- Yaoi, shounen-ai, BL; all that shit. Don't bother with yuri or shoujo-ai, they never get popular.
- If it's emo/gothic/incest/furry, you'll get double the fans. And don't forget the obligatory angst.
- Don't forget to make a banner showing off your characters raping each other.
- IT'S OKAY IF ALL YOUR CHARACTERS LOOK THE SAME.
- Men HAVE to be Über feminine, or cross dress. Bonus points if they get mistaken for girls.
- Plot is unnecessary, it gets in the way of the buttsex that all the 15 year old girls are schlicking to.
- If you insist on having a Plot, it should be a boy coming to a new city (in Japan, preferably Tokyo) and having initial trouble finding friends, until he meets his lover. Then everything is ok and you can proceed to draw nothing but softcore gay pornography.
- Re-make "Alice in Wonderland", even though you probably don't know who Lewis Carroll is and have only seen the Disney movie.
- Have the title of your comic end in the word "syndrome". Or look like poorly translated English.
- Since half the population of Smackjeeves like to pretend their life is so horrible and cut themselves nightly to sleep, if they can cut through all the fat, gore and blood will also garner attention. BECAUSE THEY CAN CONNECT.
- Cover your pages in tones. Lots and lots of grey tones. Your mistakes will be covered up.
- Add KAWAII neko ears to your characters. Srsly.
- Females don't exist in your manga. If they do, they're faghags (commonly in the form of an older sister) who cheer from the sidelines, or there to cause drama by creating a love triangle.
- Heterosexuality doesn't exist in your manga.
- Use smileys in the speech bubbles. Because that totally doesn't defy the point of comics.
- ????
- PROFIT!

Above all else, your popular webmanga should have lots of penis, semen, and sex. Simply follow this formula and the Smack Jeeves community will laud it.

Fillers

If the artist is feeling particularly lazy and isn't able to supply the masses with a new page of her comic, but feels the great need to get her enormous zit covered ass kissed in the mean time, she posts "fillers", which are usually oekaki drawings of her characters involved in sadomasochism.

Deep writing is DEEP

Most artists on this website have the delusion that if enough angst is added, it'll be a good story. They have to make sure the "Uke" (guy that gets buttsecksed) is grieving over the loss of his parents in a fatal car crash or was once raped by his next-door neighbor.

The Seme (guy who dishes buttsex) walks around with a cigarette in his mouth (one wonders why none of them have emphysema yet) and has no problems of his own. Sometimes, and only sometimes, the seme's a bearable character, but the question still stands as to WHY in their right mind they fell in love with a personality-less ambiguously gendered gary-stu who gets on everybody's fucking nerves.


Examples

Gentlemen who are skilled in the ways of the pixel

Admins want to KEEL ALL SPRITERS

Smackjeeves has been planning genocide on everyone who creates or likes sprite comics. Also, they seem to have convinced every shit comic/manga artist to hate on spriters. And rightfully so, seeing as how all spriters are pitiful, greasy, egoistic n00bs with zero talent. Yes, even less talent than those god aweful buttsexing faggots.

Once upon a time, some eight-year-old Sonic sprite comic author posted the crappiest comic series you could possibly imagine called Sonic Vs Nazo or some shit. A bunch of spriters started to flame the comic (After giving over 9000 posts of constructive criticism that the author refused to listen to) and got INSTANTLY BANNED! ZOMG! Well-loved SJ admin Cutething began banning random spriters and using flaming as an excuse to ban. Knowing all too well that every spriter and their fucking DOG would hate her for it. She's so HxC, GUYS!!!11

So now the other admin... Admin. That's his username. Anyway, he posted in the news that if any spriter steps out of line, he will start a spritercaust and will ban all the spriters in a massive fit of power-abusing rage! Then a thread started in general discussion as the administrators try to convince everyone who thinks they're wrong that they're 'complete dumbasses' and their kiss-ass yaoi shoujo loving faggot mangaka's back them up by using 4chan terms and calling all spriters 12 year olds. No srsly. Links dead.

Dark the Ninja

Recently, Dark the Ninja, one of the most insuferable people alive who can't tell the word "Made" from the word "may" has posted a picture of himself in real life. Yes, he was wearing a ninja cloak. Dark is a one of a kind faggot, thinking he's a ninja and shit. He steals and its pretty funny, but still, Dark has no grammar skills. An example of a translation from a normal sentance (Hello, may I ask you what your name is?) to Dark speak (Helo, made me ask yur name what is?). He constantly acts like he's the best spriter around, and is super cocky. Recently theres been complaints about him, mostly with his "pillow shading", the nerd's way of saying shading without a source.

According to recent sources, the ninja's (dark) grammer has gotten better. But not by much. He still fails.

Dark the ninja IRL. Ya rly.


Two Guys Think Trolling Is Funny

Was the name that was suggested for this event. And even though the user meant to be funny in saying this, the two people knew, that quite frankly. It is. You see it started at least 100 years ago a user called Rentech[1] and another known as Reds/Riex[2] decided it would be funny if Ren purposely stole from Reds, then posted it in a well known spriters area (Spriters Showcase 2.0). However, the spriters there were too much of dipshits to realize it was stolen. The name infact was also stolen. However said dipshits were...Quite frankly retarded. Friends of Ren actually believed he commited this act of sprite theft, and turned on him. Ren baw'd. However Riex was ready and willing to prove Rens innocence, and make fools out of Ren's so called allies. Though, the ones who were there when Ren and Reds made the plan decided to try and rain on their parade by leaving comments such as "JOO BE STEALINZ OLOLOLOLOL" or "Obviously stolen :\". Ren and Reds took swift action and deleted said comments. It took about 3 hours for the one man in authority, Zmanwarrior to take action. Now ironically while he is a Vagina Cleaner this extremely lulzy act made him bleed out his vagina and PMS. Zman then took down the page before it was able to be archived.



AFTERMATH In the aftermath of this AWESOME troll, Zman still bitches at Ren for the slightest word out of line. Ren however, doesn't really give a fuck.

 
 
K .3.


 


 

—Rentech


War on Wave

Seen here

Der Anstieg und Fall Der Enten

A long time ago, In a Galaxy far far away, A sonic recolor named Lugbzurg lived in harmony with the advanced spriter's and non faggots. There was...Peace. However there is no such thing as "Peace" in a warzone.... (Coming Soon)

The Kyo Saga

It started over 9000 years ago, back when Smackjeeves was not completely full of dick obsessed girls. Kyo was one of the few senior members who seemed to be appalled by the cancerous influx of yaoi and furfags. He then proceeded to begin a campaign of trolling against the teenage girls; which he received a four week ban for.

This is when things turned ugly. Kyo began to fill his time by going over to the rival comic host Drunk Duck and entered their admin account through an XSS exploit on the site. He defaced the site writing newsposts praising other webcomic hosts, including smackjeeves and put images reading "Kyo haxx0r'd your soup" all over the site. Repercussions from Smackjeeves were swift after a thread was made in the forums, some praised him and some denounced him. Cutething, the local bitch, decided to release propaganda through her fascist newspaper Smack Talk, the permaban hammer was dropped, and Kyo was expelled from the forums. But this was not the end of Kyo's story, he continued to host his comic on Smackjeeves. About a year later, another senior member, Gibson Twist threatened to leave if Kyo wasn't banned from the actual site as well, because he was so outraged over the defacement of Drunk Duck that happened almost a year ago. The Smackjeeves admin permabanned Kyo from the website entire website, because he did not want to lose Gibson Twist's awesome comic.

Censorship

This post sparked consequences that no one could see coming. it got deleted as well.

But then, at the start of August 2009, because the site owner's (whose account is cleverly called "admin") entire moderating staff leaving at once (because of some undisclosed events in the Staff area, probably involving admin sticking his dick in the moderator-cereal box) was not enough to prove that he is a totally awesome admin, he decided to go by a good example and started censoring his users, failing to realize that nobody gives a shit about what they have to say. Clearly he was very afraid that the concurrent Comic host mentioned in the censored posts would ruin the Smackjeeves facist regime, if his users ever found out about it. Therefore, he decided to completely disregard the fact that his site gets more users daily than the other one has in total, and stop the 3 users which read the news posts from finding out that there are better alternatives to Smackjeeves.

SmackJeeves Hatred of ED

Many members of Smackjeeves hate ED for the following reason

 
 
They probably made alot of teenage girls cry with their assault on us.)


 


 

—A smackjeeves user

For a day or two Smackjeeves had a news post informing the users that ED had an article on them and to not do anything about it, which was promptly ignored by the Smackjeeves forum members. One of their users came in and deleted the entire page claiming it was "for the lulz." Luckily one of our gracious admins banned the newfag and restored this page to its former glory.

 
 
That wasn't funny, it was bitchy, I mean come on, how hard is it to make fun of these people?
 

 

—Nicholas a smackjeeves user who made love to a bottle of beer

 
 
ED is mean for no reason. There just mad they dont have lives.


 


 

—A regular dumbfuck smackjeeves user

 
 
Or you're jealous because they're funny and you're...not. It's because of the 'your mom' thing, isn't it? Because really. She liked it.


 


 

—A pro-ED smackjeeves user responds

 
 
ED is dumb.
 

 

—lolsteff

Moar to come.

See Also

People Who've Tried and FAILED to Sabotage This Page and Should be Harassed Incessantly

External Links

Personal tools