So cash
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
| Forced meme ALERT: So cash will be posted by the same unfunny newfag until you like it. |
The "shit was SO cash" copypasta appeared on 4chan's /b/ sometime in mid-to-late 2007, as a picture of a typical Guido fuck with his girlfriend mocking nerdy basement-dwellers. Said guido was Paulie Carbone, a young man whose early death was mourned by relatives with heartfelt internet videos. Like gay bees to semen-flavored honey, the denizens of 4chan gobbled up this salty load of copypasta with smiles on their faces, and it spread like fail wildfire AIDS.
At first this forced meme was seen as a typical example of the cancer that is killing /b/; a typical piece of unfunny copypasta like any other. However as the original text was spammed relentlessly, chemo was performed on it, and many lulzy variations were created of the original load of copypasta, complete with an image and the variant text, making it notable for being one of the few memes to go from fail to a level of win. John, the protagonist of the original copypasta, is also dead IRL.
The failed meme has been briefly revived in the current SOHH projects. Typical use of the meme now involves the spelling "SOHH CASH". This is to reference the numerous idiots niggers on the SOHH.com forums who foolishly and blatantly challenged 4chan/ /b/ /Anonymous to an internet war welfare match.
[edit] The Original Cash
Hey Faggots,
My name is John, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day looking at stupid ass pictures. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any pussy? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to pictures on facebook.
Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I was captain of the football team, and starter on my basketball team. What sports do you play, other than "jack off to naked drawn japanese people"? I also get straight A's, and have a banging hot girlfriend (She just blew me; Shit was SO cash). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my bitch
[edit] John's death was SO crash
"John" is actually Paulie Carbone, who died July 10th 2007. Since his death was SO cash, his friends and family immediately created several shitty videos on youtube with shitty songs. Because you don't fucking mourn by posting vids on youtube visible for everyone, Anonymous, as the good-hearted person he is, offered the Carbones his condolences (video has been removed :( ) at the comments page resulting in Paulie's mom going crazy in the comments herself.
"every thing you write will be deleted if you want to say something come say it to my face pauls father would like to meet you oh also his uncle and friends and etc so keep it up come on fucking scumbag with the big mouth come say it to us so i can have you head protruding from your anus oh wait is alreday is with all the shit you say dirtbag i will be waiting that goes for all writing nasty comments come say it to me his mother who lost her only child also have your parents come meet me"
"YOU RELLY NEED TO STOPP NOW.. YOUR ALL JUST JEALOUS COZ HE WAS LOVED BY ALOT OF PEOPLE ND YOUR A WORTHLESS PiECE OF SHiT ND TRUST ME YOU DNT WANT US TO FiND YOU COZ TRUST ME YOULL HAVE TO BE HOSPiTALiZED.. GET A LiFE SCUMBAGS =]" - mariaNpaulie - Shit was SO worthless
[edit] Variant Cash
[edit] Shit was SO interesting
Hello Americans,
My name is Bill, and I like every single one of you. All of you are slim, handsome, super humans who spend every second of their day looking at amazing pictures. You are everything good in the world. Honestly, has any republican ever been mean to you? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of europeans because you're american, but you all take it to a whole new level. This is even more awesome than "Married with Children".
Don't be a stranger. Just vote for my wife. I'm pretty cool. When I was young, I was captain of the football team, and starter on my basketball team. What sports do you play? I also got straight A's, and now I have a wonderful wife (She just held a speech in New Jersey, it was SO interesting). You are all lovely democrats who like to vote for my wife. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my wife.
[edit] shit w4s SO B00M h34dsh0t
Hey newbs,
My n4m3 is 1337kr3w , 4nd I h8 3v3ry1 0f y0u. 4ll 0f y0u ar3 f4t, n3wb, c4l-0 scrubs wh0 sp3nd 3v3ry s3c0nd 0f th3ir d4y pl4ying de_dust. Y0u 4r3 4ll OGL nubst4rs. H0n3stly, h4v3 4ny 0f y0u 3v3r g0tt3n 4ny h34dsh0ts? I m34n, I gu3ss its fun m4king fun of p30pl3 wh0 buy 4ut0 snip3rs b3c4us3 0f y0ur 0wn ins3curiti3s, but y0u 4ll t4ke it t0 a wh0l3 n3w m4p. This is 3v3n w0rs3 th4n j3rking 0ff t0 pictur3s 0n aim_porn.
D0n't b3 a str4ng3r. Hit m3 with y0ur b3st h4x fl4shb4ng. I'm pr3tty much p3rf3ct. I 4m cl4n l34d3r of 3D, c4l i b4nn3d. Wh4t pubs d0 y0u pl4y in 0th3r th4n "24/7 fy_dustworld d34thm4tch". I 4ls0 g3t str4ight 4c3s, 4nd h4v3 a g0ld3n d34gl3 skin (i just kill3d s0|\/|30n3; shit w4s SO B00M h34dsh0t). Y0u 4r3 4ll nubh4ck3rs 4nd sh0uld just ~ kill urs3lvl3s. Th4nks f0r |ist3ning.
Pic r3l4t3d: It's m3 4nd my h0st4g3
[edit] Aus Cash
Hey Drongos,
My name’s Bazza, and every single one of yous pisses me off. All of you are tubby, no-life yobbos who spend your whole time looking at dag old pictures. You are everything naff in the world. Have you bunch of jokers ever got any phanny? I mean, it must be a razz laughing at ockers because of your own insecurities, but you all take it to a whole new level. This is worse than whackin ya stiffy to pictures on facebook.
Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm a bloody good bloke. I was captain of the aussie rules team, and a fuckin dazzler of a cricket player. What games do you wowsers play , other than "getting shonky to cartoons of slit eyes "? I‘m also doing ace in my HSC , and have a banging hot Shiela (She just blew on me knob like a didgeridoo; Shit was SO esh). You are all spongers who should just rack off. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my Shiela
[edit] Scot Cash
Ya Wee Bawbags,
Mah name's John, an' I hate every single ane a ye. Ye're a fat, glaikit, nae-lives fa spend every second o' their da lookin at stupit photaes and drawins. Ye're a that's wrang wie the world. Honestlae, hae ony o' you e'er gotten ony fud? Ah min, I guess et's braw makin' fun oot o' folk cus o' yer ane insecurities, but ye a' take it tae a hale new level. This is e'en worse than haein' a wank tae photaes on fisbook.
Dinnae be a cunt, ya wee pricks. Jis fuckin' come on then ye bastards. Ah'm aye braw. Ih was captain o' the fitba team, and was daein' pretty fuckin' well on mah shinty team. Fit sports dae ye play, ither than "hae a wank tae naekit jaipanese fowk"? Ah alsae git straght 1s on mah Standuard Grades, an' hae a bangin' hot quine (She jist sucked mah nob; Shit was fuckin' mintal like min!). Ye're a faggots fa shud jis kill yersels. Cheers fir puttin up wie me.
Pic Relatit: It's me an' mah quine!
[edit] George Zimmer Cash
HEY FAGGOTS,
HI, I'M GEORGE ZIMMER, FOUNDER AND CEO OF THE MEN'S WEARHOUSE. TODAY I WOULD LIKE TO EXPRESS MY DEEP AND PASSIONATE HATRED TOWARD ALL OF THE VIEWING PARTY, AND YOUR MOTHERS. WHILE PERUSING THE VAST VARIETY OF INTRACATE PORNOGRAPHIC WEBSITES OFFERED BY YOUR MOTHER I STUMBLED ACROSS YOUR QUITE HORRID SITE. ALL OF YOU WOULD BE BEST DESCRIBED AS FAILED ABORTIONS AFTER I DESTROYED YOUR MOTHERS VAGINAL VALLEYS WITH MY MONSTEROUS MEAT MONSTER WHOM SPEND EVERY SECOND OF YOUR DAYS VIEWING PORNO. TO BE QUITE FORWARD, NONE OF YOU HAVE TASTED THE GLORIOUS GLOWING JUICES OF YOUR MOTHERS VELVET UNDERGROUND AS HAVE I. ALTHOUGH I QUITE ENJOY POUNDING FURIOUSLY ON THE PELVIC FIELDS OF YOUR MOTHERS, THIS SITE IS QUITE SUCCESSFUL IN TAKING PERVERSION TO THE NEXT LEVEL. ACTIONS OF THIS NATURE COULD BE COMPARED IN A QUITE WORSE MANNER TO JERKING OFF TO PICTURES OF SUITS IN MY MOST SUCCESSFUL MENS WAREHOUSE.ALTHOUGH YOU MUST BE JELOUS OF THE EVENTS THAT ARE IMMINENT TO FOLLOW THIS THREAD, IN WHICH I WILL RAVAGE YOUR MOTHER'S BODY LIKE THE LIFELESS RAGDOLL SEXFIEND SHE REALLY IS, PLEASE PROCEED IN COMPLAINING FURTHER ABOUT YOUR POINTLESS LIVES. I COULD NOT OBTAIN A STATE OF MORE PERFECTION. I HAVE WRETCHED OPEN THE LEGS OF MORE WOMEN AND PROCEEDED TO GIVE THEM A SAMPLE OF MY MONSTEROUS FRONTAL PIECE AND FLOWING WHITE RIVERS OF LOVE THAN ALL OF YOU COMBINED. IN ONE ENORMOUS SWIFT EXPLOSION OF MY GARGANOUS DONG I CAN EMIT AN OCEAN OF MILK TO TOWER OVER EVERYONE ON THIS SITE'S PUNY DROPLETS OF SEMEN COMBINED. I NOW SUGGEST ALL OF YOU PROCEED IN ENDING YOUR PITIFUL LIVES. "I GUARENTEE IT!"
PIC RELATED: IT'S ME AND YOUR MOTHER.
[edit] Ichigo Cash
Hey Faggots,
My name is Ichigo Kurosaki, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are weak, lazy, Shinigami who spend every second of their day trying to learn the name of your Zanpakuto. You are everything bad in Seireitei. Honestly, can any of you even use Shikai? I mean, I guess it's fun killing lesser Hollows because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than watching Orihime trying to fight somebody.
Don't be a Ryoka. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I started off as a Substitute Shinigami, but soon passed up many Captains. What Kido do you use, other than "bakudō #1: Sai"? I also recently achieved Bankai, and was even trained by Shihoin Yoruichi (We just finished; Shit was SO Tensa Zangetsu). You are all faggots who should just cut your Soul Chain. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my Bankai
[edit] Oblivion Cash
Stop Right There Criminal Scum,
My name is Imperial Guard, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are low endurance, low intelligence troublemakers who spend every second of their day looking for laws to break. You are everything bad in Tamriel. Honestly, have any of you ever bought something? I mean, I guess it's fun stealing shopkeepers' property because of your low score in mercantile, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than pickpocketing wandering traders when no guards are around.
Don't be a criminal. Just hit anyone within eyesight. I'm pretty much perfect. I was captain of the running team, and starter on my shouting team. What sports do you play, other than "commit senseless acts of violence and theft against those who cannot defend themselves"? I also have full Imperial Armor, and have arrested the hero many times (She just paid the fine; Shit was SO gold). You are all criminals who should just resist arrest. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me apprehending a criminal.
[edit] Cruise Cash
Hey SP's,
My name is Tom, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day wishing they could be clear. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever been audited? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of clears because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than making fun of Battlefield Earth. Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I'm the face of a SERIOUS religion, and helping cure the mentally ill. What religion do you follow, aside from "Jesus died for my sins"? I also get straight OT levels like you wouldn't believe, and have a banging hot leader (He just made me OT VIII; Shit was SO operating thetan). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my leader
[edit] Schopenhauer Cash
Hey Faggots,
My name is Schopenhauer, and I exist because of our interconnected status within this metaphysical construct. All of you are Hypothetical, Matter-recognized, impedances on the eternal nature of mindness who spend every second of their meaningless, yet quaint existence looking at that which chooses to gaze upon them. You are everything bad in the world, as percieved by a greater majority of the moral sphere. Honestly, have any of you ever even fucking read The World As Will and Representation? I mean, I guess it's fun being completely unaware of the vast cosmic existance that pervades our very souls, deeming our own actions petty and inconsequential, playing to our own insecurities, but you all take this to a whole new level. This is even worse than that douche, Hegel.
Don't be a limited physical construct. Just hit me with your best shot (assuming that it exists within an existential realm of which I myself can percieve, if not interact with). I'm pretty much perfect (suck it, Descartes!). I was captain of the debate team (master-debater class of 1804) , and wrote a book. A fucking book. What books have you written, other than "jacking off to naked drawn japanese people FOR DUMMIES"? My metaphysical treatises are the foundation for that which influenced the likes of Nietzsche, Wagner, and a whole mess of germans. I have a hot bitch or ten in my stables at all times ("women are by nature meant to obey" who said that, faggots? Not you, that's fucking who.). You are nothing but an endless interplay of images and desires.
Thanks for listening, as if it mattered.
Pic Related: It's me and my fucking boss sideburns.
[edit] Gary Motherfucking Oak Cash
Hey Faggots,
My name is Gary motherfucking Oak, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are retarded talentless trainers who spend every second of their day looking at other peoples pokedexes. You are everything bad in the poke`world. Honestly, have any of you ever caught any Mudkipz? I mean, I guess it's fun challenging young trainers and cooldudes to matches people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than doing the elite four with a bunch of pokemon you raised with duped candy.
Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I am a leading pokemon researcher, and Professor Oak chose me first to complete his pokedex. What badges have you won , other than "biggest loser who couldn't even catch a Pidgey"? I also catch any pokemon first try and have a banging hot Gyarados (he just evolved for me; Shit was SO Ash). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Smell you later.
Pic Related: It's me and my Charizard.
[edit] KOTOR HK-47 Cash
Greeting: Hey Meatbags,
Introduction: I am referred to as H-CASH-47, and I detest every single one of you.
Observation: All of you are poorly hygienic, mentally handicapped, fleshy blobs who partake in the visual processing of idiotic images every second of their day. You are the reason the meatbags of the galaxy created assassin droids.
Query: Have any of you meatbags truly had sexual relations with a female member of your species?
Conjecture: It is possible that degrading others due to one’s own shortcomings is enjoyable, however you increase this to an entirely new capacity.
Statement: Said actions are more pathetic than pleasuring one’s self to photographs on social networks.
Eager Invitation: Do not remain a stranger.
Goading Statement: By all means, attempt to damage my personage. As a droid, I am closer to perfection that you could ever possibly be.
Proud Boast: This unit exterminated 104 people within a period of one standard month and is eager to add to that count.
Query: What physical activities do you engage in, other than "self pleasuring to unclothed illustrations"?
Additional Boast: I am also estimated to have been programmed with an IQ of over 267, and have a visually attractive companion (Whom just blew one of my fuses; the act of which was extremely likable).
Degrading Remark: You are all stupid meatbags who should self terminate at once.
Statement: Thank you for receiving this message.
Explanation: The accompanying image depicts me and my female meatbag slave.
[edit] Hillbilly Cash
[edit] Matrix Cash
01001000011001010111100100100000010001100110000101100111011001110110111101110100011100110010 11000010000000001101000010100000110100001010010011010111100100100000011011100110000101101101 01100101001000000110100101110011001000000100101001101111011010000110111000101100001000000110 00010110111001100100001000000100100100100000011010000110000101110100011001010010000001100101 01110110011001010111001001111001001000000111001101101001011011100110011101101100011001010010 00000110111101101110011001010010000001101111011001100010000001111001011011110111010100101110 00100000010000010110110001101100001000000110111101100110001000000111100101101111011101010010 00000110000101110010011001010010000001100110011000010111010000101100001000000111001001100101 01110100011000010111001001100100011001010110010000101100001000000110111001101111001011010110 11000110100101100110011001010111001100100000011101110110100001101111001000000111001101110000 01100101011011100110010000100000011001010111011001100101011100100111100100100000011100110110 01010110001101101111011011100110010000100000011011110110011000100000011101000110100001100101 01101001011100100010000001100100011000010111100100100000011011000110111101101111011010110110
[edit] THE BEST Cash
Hey THE BEST Faggots,
THE BEST is THE BEST, and I THE BEST of you. All of you are THE BEST, THE BEST, THE BEST who spend every second of THE BEST looking at THE BEST pictures. You are THE BEST in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten THE BEST? I mean, I guess it's THE BEST making THE BEST of people because you're THE BEST, but you all take THE BEST to a whole new level. This is even worse than THE BEST jerking off to THE BEST on facebook.
Don't be THE BEST. Just hit me with THE BEST shot. I'm pretty much THE BEST. I was THE BEST of THE BEST team, and THE BEST on my basketball team. What sports are you THE BEST at, other than "jack off to THE BEST drawn THE BEST people"? I also get THE BEST A's, and have THE BEST girlfriend (She just blew me; shit was THE BEST). You are all THE BEST who should just kill THE BEST. Thanks for being THE BEST.
Pic THE BEST: It's me and THE BEST
[edit] So Cosh
Hoy Foggots,
My nome os John, ond I hote overy songle one of you. All of you ore fot, rotorded, no-lofes who spond overy socond of thoir doy looking ot stopod oss poctures. You ore overythong bod on the world. Honestly, hove ony of you ovor gotton ony possy? I moan, I guoss ot's fon moking fon of poople bocause of your own onsecuroties, bot you oll toke to a whole now lovol. Thos os oven worse thon jorking off to poctures on focebook.
Don't be o stronger. Jost hot me woth your best shot. I'm protty moch porfoct. I wos coptain of the footboll team, ond storter on my bosketboll team. Whot sports do you ploy, other thon "jack off to nakod drown joponese poople"? I olso get stroight O's, ond hove o bonging hot gorlfrond (She jost blew me; Shot wos SO cosh). You ore oll foggots who should jost kill yourselves. Thonks for lostening.
Poc Roloted: Ot's me ond my botch
[edit] Squirtle Cash
Hey Bug types,
My name is Squirtle, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are lousy, crappy, Bug-types who spend every second of their day looking for a Bug Trainer. You are everything bad in the Poke-dex. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten a badge? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of water types because of your own weaknesses, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than learning Splash attack.
Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I was captain of the Squirtle Squad, and starter on Ash Kechum's championship Pokemon League team. What trainers do you work for, other than "Crappy 10 year old Bug Catcher Steve"? I also get straight LV 50 moves, and I'm about to evolve (He just trained me; Shit was SO cash). You are all crappy Caterpie's and Weedles who should just faint. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my Squad
[edit] Mahmoud Cash
Hey Infidels,
My name is Mahmoud, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded Americans who spend every second of their day blaspheming the will of Allah. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever not kissed off to the Israeli lobby? I mean, I guess it's fun invading and occupying sovereign lands for oil, but you all take it to a whole new level. This is even worse than depicting the prophet himself.
Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best ICBM. I'm pretty much perfect. I know how to enrich uranium, and I'm thinking about building my own nuclear weapons. What sports do you play, other than "eat all the cheeseburgers I can swallow"? I also pray toward Mecca every morning, and have a banging hot girlfriend (She just blew me; Shit was SO cash). You are all zionist jews who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my bitch
[edit] WoW Cash
Hey Queers,
My name is Mythril Wolf, and I hate every single one of you alpha male dick suckers. All of you are greasy, retarded, meat-heads who spend every second of their day looking at thier abs in a mirror. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten your character to lvl 50 I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than cheating on your girlfriend and being a drunken bafoon at the club.
I'm ready for insults you have. GO ahead, make fun of my life. I'm pretty much immune. Awesome skills, funny jokes, I was a top admin on the best video game forum around, and i am go to Japan to teach English for a year. What games do you play, other than roofie blond girls and raep them in your dads mercedes I also get straight A's, and have a girlfriend that plays wow with me (She just gave me a handie; it was SO epic). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: it's me playing WoW. Be jealous.
[edit] PvP Cash
Hey Scrubs,
My name is Hotsoup and I'm better than every single one of you. All of you are keyboard-turning, mouse-clicking, low rated failures who spend every day gawking at 1850 rated PVP'ers. You are everything bad in WoW. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten above 1500? I mean, I guess it's fun losing 10 games a week and calling it, but you all take it to a whole new level. This is even worse than paying for your S3 weapon and shoulders.
Don't be a coward. Go ahead and try me. I'm the best hunter ever on Kargath. I'm leader of my guild, and co-owner of my 2v2 team. I also get 100's on my rolls every time, and just got the mail chest off of Hydross (I just got it enchanted; shit was SUCH an upgrade). You are all scrubs who should just quit the game. Thanks for listening.
Pic related: It's me and my raid.
Picture is some hunter(assume it's Hotsoup) taking a picture of his raid OR it's a picture of a man talking to an audience.
[edit] Kim Cash
Herro Faggots,
Mahr nam is Kim, and I rearry rearry hate every singre one of you. Arr of you are fat, retarded, no-rifes who sprend every second of their day rooking at stupid ass piccures. You are evurthing bad in the worrd. Honestry, have any of you ever gottern any prussy? Ri mrean, Ri gress irt's frun mraking frun orf peopre brecause of your own insecuritries, brut rou arr trake to a whorr new rever. Thris is reven worse than jerking off to pricures on facebook.
Don't be a shranger. Just hrit me with your best shrot. I'm pretty much prerfect. I wras captain of the frootball team, and strarter on my basketball team. What sprorts do you play, orther than "jack off to naked drarn japarese preople"? I also get straight A's, and have a branging hot girrfriend (She just brew me; Shit was SRO cash). You are arr faggots who should just kirr yourserrs. Thranks for ristening.
Pic Rerated: It's mre and my britch
[edit] Blind Cash
- . :.
- .:: :: : : :::. .: :.: :: ..: .::: :.: : : :: :...:. .: : :.::.:.:::::::: : :: :: . :: : .:.. :.: .:::. : :..:: : ::.::.::. .: : : : : :: : . :.:::: .:: :::: : ::...: :: . : : :::: : :: :: : ::: ::... :: : :::::: :: : :::: ::: ::: :::.:..:::::: :::::::..:.:.::..:: :::
- ..:: .:.:::: .:: :::: : ::...: :: . : : :::: : :: :: : ::: ::... :: : :::::: :: : :::: ::: ::: :::.:..:::::: :::::::..:.:.::..:: ::: :.:::: .:: :::: : ::...: :: . : : :::: : :: :: : ::: ::... :: : :::::: :: : :::: ::: ::: :::.:..:::::: :::::::..:.:.::..:: ::: :.:::: .:: :.:::: .:: :::: : ::...: :: . : : :::: : :: :: : ::: ::... :: : :::(:..:::: . :: ...:: :.:::::) ::: :: : :::: ::: ::: :::.:..:::::: :::::::..:.:.::..:: :::
- ..::.: .:: :.:. :::..::
[edit] Rick Cash
Hey you,
My name is Rick, and I am never gonna give you up. All of you have let me down, made me cry, and spent all day telling lies and hurting people. Your heart's been aching but you're too shy to say it. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten this from any other guy? I mean, I guess it's fun knowing the game and playing it, but you all take to a whole new level. Inside we both know what's been going on.
Don't be a stranger to love. You know the rules and so do I. I'm pretty much perfect. I have been nominated for a Grammy, and had a #1 hit. What games do you play, other than "running around deserting people"? And if you ask me how I’m feeling, I also have a banging hot girlfriend (We’ve known each other for SO long). I just wanted to tell you how I was feeling. I gotta make you understand.
Pic Related: It's me and my full commitment
[edit] German Cash
Hey Schwuchteln,
Mein Name ist John und ich hasse jeden einzelnen von euch fetten, behinderten Leuten ohne RL, die sich dn ganzen Tag nur dumme Bilder angucken. Mal ehrlich, hat überhaupt jemals einer von euch ´ne Muschi abbekommen? Ich meine, wahrscheinlich macht es euch Spaß, euch über andere Menschen lustig zu machen um eure eigene innere Unsicherheit zu verdecken, aber ihr bringt das auf ein völlig neues Level. Das ist sogar schlimmer als sich auf die Bilder auf Facebook einen runterzuholen.
Versucht ruhig, mich fertigzumachen. Ich bin ziemlich perfekt. Ich war Captain im Football Team und starter in meinem Basketball Team. Welchen anderen Sport ausser "zu nackten gezeichneten Charakteren von Fire Emblem wichsen" spielt ihr? Ich bekomme ausserdem überall glatte Einsen und habe eine scharfe Freundin (sie hat mir grade einen geblasen, Scheisse war SO Bargeld). Ihr seid alle Schwuchteln die sich einfach umbringen sollten. Danke für´s zuhören.
Bild Themenverwandt: Das bin ich mit meiner Schlampe
[edit] Norwegian Cash
Hei Homser,
Mitt navn er John, og jeg hater hvert eneste av dere. Dere er allesammen feite, funskjonshemmede tapere som bruker hvert sekund av dagen deres foran dataen og ser på dårlige bilder. Dere er alt som er dårlig i verden. Ærlig talt, har noen av dere noen gang fått noe fitte? Liksom, jeg mener at det er sikert morsomt å gjøre narr av folk for sine egene usikkerhet, men dere tar det til en helt ny nivå. Dette er enda verre enn å onaneri til bilder fra Facebook.
Ikke vær en fremmed. Bare riv løs på meg. Jeg er for det meste perfekt. Jeg var kaptein av fotball laget, og starteren av basketball laget. Hvilkne sport spiller dere, unntatt "onaner over nakne bilder av tegnte Fire Embler folk"? I får også reine 6'ere, og jeg har en jævelig hot dame (Hun sugde meg i stad, var SÅ jævelig rå). Dere er alle sammen homser som burde bare ta selvmord. Takk for at dere hørte på.
bilde er relevant: Det er meg og kjerringa.
[edit] Malaysian Cash
Pekabar anak2 setan,
Nama aku Johan, Dan aku benci korang sume. Korang semua gemuk, bodoh, Orang2 yang suka membazir mase melihat gambar2 bodoh. Tiada gunanya korang kat dunia nie. Secara jujur, korang sume nie pernah ade pepek ke? maksud aku, Aku rase korang memang rase best mempermalukan org laen, Tapi korang sume dah melebih2. Nie lgi teruk drpd main toceng kat Facebook.
X yah takut2. Cube ejek aku sepenuh hati. Aku nie ada sikit sempurna . Aku dulu bekas kapten kumpulan bolasepak, dan starter kat bola keranjang. Ape permainan yg korang maen, selain "main toceng kat lukisan orang jepun yg berbogel" ? Aku jge dpt semua A, dan awek yg gile cun (Die mmg cun gile nak mampos;Taik MMG berduit). Korang sume nie mmg anak setan lebih baik gi mampos. Trismas kerna mendengar.
Gbr berkenaan: Itu aku dan awek aku.
[edit] Sparta Cash
Έι, πούστρες,
Με λένε Λεωνίδα, και σας μισώ όλους. Είστε όλοι ένα μάτσο χοντροί, καθυστερημένοι άζωοι που περνάτε κάθε δευτερόλεπτο της ημέρας σας κοιτάζοντας μαλακίες εικόνες. Είστε ότι κακό σε αυτόν τον κόσμο. Ειλικρινά, έχει γαμήσει ποτέ κανένας σας; Θέλω να πω, έχει πλάκα να κοροιδεύετε τον κόσμο λόγω των δικών σας ανασφαλειών, αλλά αυτό ξεπερνάει τα όρια. Αυτό είναι χειρότερο και απ' το να τραβάς μαλακία στις εικόνες του Facebook.
Μην κολώνετε. Πείτε μου ό,τι γουστάρετε. Είμαι σχεδόν τέλειος. Ήμουν αρχηγός της ομάδας του ποδοσφαίρου, και βασικός στην ομάδα του μπάσκετ. Τι άλλα σπορ παίζετε, εκτός από το "τραβάω μαλακία με ζωγραφισμένες γιαπωνέζες"; Επίσης παίρνω συνεχώς εικοσάρια, και έχω μία καυτή γκομενάρα (μόλις μου πήρε πίπα -ΠΟΛΥ γαμάτο). Είστε όλοι πούστηδες που πρέπει να αυτοκτονήσετε. Ευχαριστώ που με ακούσατε.
Σχετική η εικόνα: είμαι εγώ με την σκύλα μου.
[edit] Terminator Cash
Hey Humans,
My name is T-John-100, and I will terminate every single one of you. All of you are human, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day trying to achieve supreme A.I . You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever even gotten a cyber implant? I mean, I guess it's fun putting people in mad asylums because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than fighting the rebels int he future.
Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I'm a cybernetic organism. Living tissue over a metal endoskeleton., and squadleader on my termination team. What weapons can you use?, other than a shotgun or m16? I also get 100% confirmed kills, and have a banging hot TX-girlfriend (She just upgraded my ram ; Shit was SO cash). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my bitch from the future
[edit] Scooby Cash
Rerro Fraggots,
Mry name is Scrooby, rand I hrate every sringle one of you. Arll of roo are frat, retarded, ro-rives roo sprend revery second rof their day rooking rat stupid rass prictures. Roo rar reverything brad rin the rorld. Ronestly, rave rany of roo rever grotten any prussy? Ri mean, Ri guess rit's frun making frun rof preople brecause of rour rown rinsecurities, brut roo rall trake tro ra whrole rew revel. Rhis ris reven wrorse rhan rerking roff tro pictures ron fracebook.
Ron't be ra stranger. Rust rhit re rith rour brest shrot. Ri'm pretty mruch perfect. Ri was rhe read of mry rown shrow, and frucked rover ghrosts. Rhat sprorts dro roo pray, rother rhan "jrack roff tro raked rawn jrapanese preople"? Ri ralso gret scooby shnacks, rand hrave ra branging hrot grirlfriend (Shre just threw me shome schrooby shnacks; Shrit ras RHO rhash). Roo rare rall raggots whro shrould jrust rhill roorshelves. Rhanks fror ristening.
Ric Rhelated: Rit's rhe rand mry ritch
[edit] Desu Cash
Desu Desu,
Desu desu desu desu Desu, desu Desu desu desu desu desu desu desu. Desu desu desu desu desu, desu, desu-desu desu desu desu second desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu. Desu desu desu desu desu desu desu. Desu, desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu? Desu desu Desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu, desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu. Desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu.
Desu desu desu desu. Desu desu desu desu desu desu desu. Desu desu desu desu. Desu desu desu desu desu desu desu, desu desu desu desu desu desu. Desu desu desu desu desu, desu desu "desu desu desu desu desu desu desu"? Desu desu desu desu Desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu (Desu desu desu desu; Desu desu DESU desu). Desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu desu. Desu desu desu.
Desu Desu: Desu desu desu desu.
[edit] Mexican Cash
Hola maricas,
Mi nombre es Juan, y los odio a todos. Todos ustedes son unos gordos, retrasados y sin vida que pasan cada segundo de sus días mirando putas imágenes estúpidas. Ustedes son todo lo malo que hay en este mundo. ¿Honestamente, alguno de ustedes se ha cogido algún coño? Digo, supongo que es divertido reírse de la gente debido a tus propias inseguridades, pero ustedes llevan esto a un nuevo nivel. Esto es peor que masturbarse con fotos de facebook.
No se detengan. Denme su mejor tiro. Soy básicamente perfecto. Fui capitán del equipo de fútbol, e inicié mi propio equipo de básquetbol. ¿Qué otro deporte practican ustedes, aparte de “masturbarse con dibujos de japoneses desnudos”? Aparte obtengo puras A, y tengo una novia que hecha humo (Me acaba de hacer una chupada, la mierda fue PURA ganancia). Todos ustedes son maricas que deberían suicidarse. Gracias por leer.
Foto relacionada: Soy yo y mi puta.
[edit] French cash
Salut pédés,
Mon nom est Jean, et je déteste vous tous. Vous êtes tous les obèses sans vie des idiots qui passent chaque seconde de votre journée à chercher à stupide images. Vous êtes tout mauvais dans le monde. Honnêtement, avez-vous jamais obtenu de chatte? Je veux dire, je suppose que c'est du plaisir à se moquer des gens à cause de votre propre insécurité. Mais vous le prenez à un niveau plus haut. C'est pire que de se branler aux photos de Facebook.
Ne soyez pas un étranger. Frappez-moi avec vos meilleurs! Je suis à peu près parfait. Je suis le capitaine de l'équipe de football américain, et je joue aussi sur l'équipe de basketball. Quel sport jouez-vous, en plus de "se branler aux dessins animés des femmes nues japonaise." Je suis aussi un étudiant parfait, et j'ai un putain de chaude copine (elle vient de me donné la fellation; merde était TELLEMENT doux).
Vous êtes des pédés qui ne devrait commettre suicide. Merci de votre attention.
Pic pertinente: C'est moi et ma salope.
[edit] Swede Cash
Hey bögar,
Mitt namn är John, och jag hatar varenda en av er. Alla ni är feta, efterblivna, har inga liv och spenderar all tid på att glo på dumma jävla bilder. Ni är allt dåligt i denna världen. Seriöst, har någon av er ens fått fitta? Jag menar, jag antar att de är skoj att reta folk pga era egna problem, men ni tar det till en helt ny nivå, Det är till och med värre än att runka till Facebook bilder.
Va inte feg, Försök med det bästa du kan. Jag är så gott som perfekt. Jag va lagkapten för mitt fotbollslag, och va med från början i mitt basketlag. Vilka sporter deltar ni i, förutom att "runka till nakna ritade Fire Emblem karaktärer"? Jag får också spikade MVG'n, och har en kanonshet flickvän (Hon sög just av mig, skiten var SÅ kontanter). Ni är alla bögar som borde ta livet av er. Tack för att ni lystnade.
Bilden är relevant: Det är jag och min bitch
[edit] Gentleman Cash
My name is Winston Holmes the 4th, and I dislike all of you little devils. One could say all you are porky, stupid, 3rd class citizens who spend every moment of their dreadful day looking at silly old pictures. You are all that is horrid in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever escorted a beautiful lady? One means, one guesses it is jolly good fun insulting other people because of your own insecurities, but you devils take to a whole new level. This is even worse than meeting Madam Palm and her five beautiful daughters to pictures on Facebook.
It wouldn’t be fair for me to chastise you without giving you the chance to return the favour, pip. Go ahead blighters. One is pretty much perfect. One was captain of the football team (proper football, none of that Yankee tripe), and starter on one’s cricket team. What sports do you play? One also gets straight A's at Eton, and has a spliffingly beautiful lady friend (She just made me tea; crumpets were gosh darn spliffing). You little blighters should sort one’s life out. Cheerio old boy, cheers for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my smashing lady
[edit] Classical Cash
Good Evening Homosexuals,
I am known as Jonathan, and I must admit that a rather strong, negative feeling overwhelms me when I find myself in your presence. Verily, it has become apparent that your group has a weight problem, a rather low I.Q., and suffers from various antisocial disorders, perseverating on an obsession with photography analysis. Your existence is culturally bankrupt and socially infectious. Now, be truthful: do any of you know the ways of a woman? I can understand that such weak egos may lead to public harassment, but the actions committed here are appalling. Such behavior exceeds the stigma of soiled thoughts when viewing the photographs of acquaintances.
I urge all before me to be honest. Attempt an insult, you will find that it is quite difficult. My body and mind are perfectly balanced and completely efficient. I served as the honorable captain of the rugby club, and was one of the most talented members of the polo team in my gentleman's club. If I may inquire, in which activities does the lot of you partake, beyond auto-erotic pleasures in the presence of animated features from the far east? Beyond the aforementioned traits, I have a pristine academic record and a lover whose body was sculpted by angels (her most recent fellation upon my phallus caused an ecstasy greater than all of the queen's gold). Homosexuals such as yourselves would be better off terminating your own lives as a favor to the status quo of the general public.
Picture Related: It is me and my lady who partakes in coitus for the sake of a monetary reward. Also, my lover is to the right.
[edit] ACK Cash
ACK ack ackk!,
Ack aaack ack, ack ACK ACKKK ACKKK, Ackk ack ACK ACK ack-ack ACK ACK ACK. Ack ack ack Ack, aaack, ACK, ACK ACKKK ACK ACK ACKKKK ACKK ACK!!! ACK ack ack-ack ackk ack. Ack-ack, ack ACK ACKK Ackk? Ack, ACK ACK aack ACK ACK ACK ACK ack ack-ACK-ack ACK ACK ACK ack-ack ACK, ack ack ACK ACK ACKKK!!! Ack ack ackkkk-ack ACK ACK AAACK ACK ACK Facebook.
Aaaaack ack ack ACK-ACK ack aaaack ACK ACK-ACK-ACK ACK, ack. Ack ack ack. ACK ack ACK. ACK ack ack ack (ack ack, ack ack ACK), ack ACK ACK ACK. Ack ack aaaaack? ACK ack ACK ACK, ack ack ack aaaack ACK-ACKK (Ack ack ack ack; ack ack ack ACK). Ack ackk ack ackk ACK-ACK ACK ACKKK!! Ack ack ack.
ACK ACK ack-aaack: Ack ack ACK ACK ACK!!
[edit] Pikashoop
pi-i Pika-pika,
pi Pika chu Piii, Kaa Pi piii chuuu piikaa kaa Ka pii. kaa Pi pi-i Kaa Pii, pi-kaaa-chu, ka-Pikaa pi-i kachu pikaa pikachu Ka piika pi-i pi-ka-chu pi Piikaa pii Pika-pika. chu chu chu-pi-kaaa-chu Kaa ka pi-i Chuuu. pika-pika, Pika chu ka Pi-i Chuu piikaa pii pikapi? pi Piii, pi chuuu Ka'Pi kaa pikachu kaa Pi piikaa Pika-pika chu Kaaa Chu Piika-chuuu-chu, pi-i Kaa Pii chuu chu pi pikaa pii piika. kaaa chu pipi pikapi Pika Pikachu kaa pi pika-pika pi pika-pika.
pii'pi ka pi Pi-kaaa-chu. pika Pi-i Ka Kachu pika Pipi Pika. Pi'pi Chuuuu kaaa pi-ka-chu. pi pii pi-ka-chu pi pi-i piikachu Kachu, pi-i pikachu ka Ka chu-piikachu Pika. kaaa Pika-pi chu Pi-i Pipi, chuuu pika "piii pi-i ka Pikaa pikapi pika-pika pikachu"? pi chuu pi-i pi-kaaa-chu pi'pi, Pi-i kachu pi pikachu Pii pika-pi-pipi (Pii Pika pika Ka; Pipi kaa SO pika). pi-i pii kaa Pi-ka-chu pii pika-pi pipi piii chu-pikachu. pikachu Pi-i Pikachu-pi.
pi-i Pi-ka-chu: pi'Pi Pi pii pi MUDKIP
[edit] Bob Ross Cash
[edit] Retarded Naruto Cash
[edit] Meep Cash
[edit] Nigga Cash
yo bitches,
niggas call me j-kwal, an i fuckin hate all yall. yall are fat, dumass, whiteys that spend ery fuckin second a they day lookin at stupidass fuckin pictas. yall erythang gay in tha world. for real, any yall mothafuckas ever gotten some fuckin pussy? i mean, i guess it's fun makin fun a niggas cuz a ya own insecurities, but yall take tha shit to a whole new fuckin level. shits even worse than jackin off ta pictures on fuckin facebook.
so holla nigga. step tha fuck up. i just dont give a fuck. im fuckin og of the 22nd street bloodz, and baddest nigga on my block. fuck yall do?, otha than "jack off ya lil dick ta naked drawn sleepyheads"? im fuckin grindin ery damn day, and got a fine ass fuckin bitch (she just blew me; nigga god DAMN). all a yall are faggots who should just kill they bitch asses. thanks fa listenin niggas.
pic related: its me and shanaynay
[edit] Bizarro Cash
Hey dudes,
My name is Jack, and I like every single one of you. All of you are cool, witty, funny guys who spend your free time of their day looking at funny pictures and macros. You are the sense of humor that lacks in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any hate mail? I mean, I’m sure it’s fun making fun of people because you are so witty, but you all take it to a whole new level. This is even more awesome than stand up comedy.
Don’t be a stranger. Just laugh with me too. I’m pretty cool. I was editor of my school newspaper and started my own detective agency. What funny activities do you do, other than “having fun to awesome drawn Japanese anime”? I also live with my mother and have a modest friend who is a girl. (She just taught me calculus; Stuff was SO complicated) You are all awesome who should gather at a big party. Thank you for listening to me.
Pic Related: It’s me and my female friend.
[edit] Shit was SO Cache
if(md5(copypasta) == md5(current_post)) { return fail; }
[edit] Cashimus Prime
Hey Decepticreeps,
My name is Optimus Prime, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are evil, Unicron-spawned, robotic life-forms who spend every second of their day making stupid plans. You are everything bad in on our homeworld of Cybertron. Honestly, have any of your ridiculous plans for world conquest ever worked? I mean, I guess it's fun trying to steal all the Energon you can, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than that Cobra commander jerk.
Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I’m leader of the Autobots, and bearer of the Matrix of Leadership. What sports do you play, other than "Transform into stupid stuff like tape players and guns"? I also turn into a truck, and have a banging hot girlfriend (She just overloaded my circuits; Slag was SO Energon). You are all pit-spawn who should just offline. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my bitch
[edit] Slak'tar
Hey bipeds,
My name is Slak'tar, and I position my hyponome in distaste at every one of you. All of you are fleshy, insignificant, filthy humans who spend every second of their day looking at human images which cannot be distinguished with my poor cephalopod eyesight. You are everything dissatisfactory in the world. Honestly, do any of you have prominent tentacles? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of people because of you don't have a distinctive wide radula with nine teeth, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than spawning eggs in an unsecured location.
I invite you to attempt to engage me in combat. Just try to hunt me with your inferior diving techniques. I'm pretty much perfect. I extract salt from my siphuncle, and control bouyancy with my osmotical pumping of fluid into my camerae. What form of propulsion do you utilise? I feed mainly on shrimp, and spawn once a year (just regenerated my gonads; shit was SO typical of my sexually bimorphic species). You are all inferior meatbags who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
[edit] PC
Hey Macfags,
My name is PC, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day making stupid ass photobooks. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever played any games? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of other OS's because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than having only 1 mouse button.
Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I can run any software, and play any game. What programs can you run, other than itunes and photoshop? I also have an nvidia 9 series, and have a bangin hot monitor (She just displayed Crysis at 60fps; Shit was SO cash). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my monitor
[edit] Fritzl Cash
Hey Faggots,
My name is Josef, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day looking at my stupid pictures. I will rape everything in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any of my daughter's pussy? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to pictures of my daughter on facebook.
Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I've refurnished my basement, and have seven kids/grandkids. What have you done, other than "jack off to naked drawn japanese people"? I get laid ANY time I want, and I have a banging hot daughter (I just raped her; Shit was SO quid). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my bitch
[edit] Grawp Cash
WIKIPEDOS
GRAWP HATE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU FAT RETARDED NO LIFES WHO SPEND EVERY SECOND OF DAY ROLLBACKING IP EDITS FROM SCHOOLKIDS. GRAWP THINK YOU EVERYTHING BAD IN WORLD. HAVE ANY YOU EVER GOT ANY PUSSY? GRAWP GUESS YOU THINK IT FUN BLOCKING VANDALISM-ONLY ACCOUNTS BECAUSE OF YOUR INSECURITIES, BUT YOU ALL TAKE TO WHOLE NEW LEVEL. THIS EVEN WORSE THAN SCEPTRE JERKING OFF TO RIANA.
DON'T BE A THATCHER. JUST BLOCK ME WITH YOUR BEST CHECKUSER. GRAWP PRETTY MUCH PERFECT. GRAWP CAPTAIN OF THE PAGE MOVE TEAM, AND STARTER ON THE UPLOADING GOATSE AND LOL WUT TEAM. WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY, OTHER THAN "REVERTED EDITS BY GRAWP TO LAST VERSION BY JESKE COURIANO"? GRAWP ALSO GET ENCOURAGEMENT FROM ED, AND HAVE SEXY BITCH (SHE JUST SUCKED MY MASSIVE COCK, SHIT WAS SO HAGGER????????????????????????????????) GRAWP THINK YOU ALL FAGGOTS WHO SHOULD BECOME AN HEROES. GRAWP LAUGHS IN YOUR FUCKING FAGGOT FACES FOR LISTENING.
PIC RELATED: IT'S GRAWP AND URBAN ROSE
[edit] Sceptre Cash
Hey Vandals,
My name is Sceptre, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, Dramacrats who spend every second of their day writing attack articles. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever written any Featured articles? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than the stalkers at the Wikipedia Review.
Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best vandalism. I'm pretty much perfect. I was an admin for a year, and have over a hundred userboxes. What sports do you play, other than "troll sysops' talk pages"? I also enforce BLP, and have a banging hot admin coach (She just gave me a barnstar; Shit was SO cash). You are all trolls who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my admin coach.
[edit] Jimbo Cash
Hey Trolls,
My name is Jimbo, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day trying to edit my online encyclopedia in bad faith. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever tried doing something good for the child in Africa? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of my empire of free knowledge because it was written by people smarter than you, but you all take this to a whole new level. This is even worse than the John Seigenthaler scandal.
Don't be a troll. Just contribute with your best knowledge. I'm pretty much perfect. I am the head of the Wikimedia Foundation, and co-founder of Wikia. What online organizations have you founded, other than "co-ordinating trolls to change the hard facts in the English Wikipedia"? I also get to spend public donations on Russian hookers, and had a banging hot ex-girlfriend (When she blew me, shit was SO gonna end up on eBay). You are all trolls who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and Rachel Marsden
[edit] Kyle Cash
Hey Chavs,
My name is Jeremy, and I want to help every single one of you. All of you are fat, lazy, single parents who spend every second of their day smoking cannabis and drinking alcohol. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever tried looking after your kids and being a family? I mean, I guess it's fun having unprotected sex as a teenager and expecting to live on benefits, but you all take this to a whole new level. This is even worse than failing a lie detector test.
Draw a line in the sand. There's two sides to every story. But me, I'm pretty much perfect. I have my own weekday show on ITV, and had my own radio show for many years. What have you done with your career, other than "failed your GCSEs miserably then ended up in prison"? I also help disadvantaged children, and have a model wife (She just blew me; don't tell her I'd secretly rather be with a 16-year-old). You are all working class people who should just get a job. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my wife
[edit] Putin Cash
Hey World Leaders,
My name is Vladimir, and I'm better than every single one of you. All of your peoples are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day working in the service industry and fighting wars over oil. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever worked for the KGB? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of the Russian Federation's people because of your countries' pitifully inadequate natural resources, but you all take this to a whole new level. This is even worse than terrorist activity in Chechnya.
Don't be a democracy. Just submit to the Russian bear. I'm pretty much perfect. I was President of Russia for two terms, and Prime Minister of Russia and still completely in control. What offices have you held, other than "puppet leader of 51st state of America"? I also get unanimous support from my own people, and have an averagely hot wife (She just blew me; but my mistresses are much better at that). You are all failures who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my wife
[edit] Murdoch Cash
Hey Proletarians,
My name is Rupert, and I'm controlling every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who will vote for whatever political party I tell you to. You are everything exploitable in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever thought for yourself? I mean, I guess it's fun going with the masses and not thinking critically about what you read or watch, but you all take this to a whole new level. This is even worse than liberal leftists writing in The Guardian.
Don't try to oppose me. Just sit back and relax with a copy of The Sun or watch Fox News. I'm pretty much perfect. I am the CEO of News Corporation, and have more money than most governments. What influence do you have, other than "spreading the word about trying to find Madeleine McCann"? I also get to live a life of luxury, and have a banging hot azn trophy wife (She just blew me; She love me long time). You are all unthinking masses who should just continue taking in my media so that I get more money. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my wife
[edit] Emma Watson Cash
Hey Faggots
My name is Johnny, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarted, no-lifes who spend every second of their day looking at stupid-ass pictures. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have you ever gotten any pussy? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take it to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to pictures on facebook.
Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I sing for my band Razorlight, and I shoot heroin. What do you do, other than jack off to my girlfriends pussy in see-thru panties? I also didn't finish high school, and have a banging hot girlfriend(Emma Watson bitches - I took her cherry before she turned 18; Shit was SO tight). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves.
Thanks for listening.
Pic related: Its me and my bitch.
[edit] Godspeed Cash
Hey Liberals,
My name is Andrew, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are deceitful, pseudo-intellectual, non-achievers who spend every second of their day censoring conservative speech. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten close to Jesus? I mean, I guess some people need to open their minds, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than homosexuality and evolutionism.
Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I have a degree in Electrical Engineering and Computer Science, and I'm the founder of my own online, trustworthy encyclopedia. What have you accomplished, other than "praise fellow liberals"? I also give my homeschooling students straight A's, and have a wife who’s willowy and submissive (we've had sex in the missionary position three times in total; Shit was SO Godspeed). You are all liberals who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me. My wife is in the kitchen.
[edit] Shit was SO bork
Hey Fegguts,
My neme-a is Juhn, und I hete-a ifery seengle-a oone-a ooff yuoo. Bork bork. Ell ooff yuoo ere-a fet, reterded, nu-leeffes vhu spend ifery secund ooff zeeur dey luukeeng et stoopeed ess peectoores. Yuoo ere-a iferytheeng bed in zee vurld. Hunestly, hefe-a uny ooff yuoo ifer guttee uny poossy? I meun, I gooess it's foon mekeeng foon ooff peuple-a becoose-a ooff yuoor oovn insecooreeties, boot yuoo ell teke-a tu a vhule-a noo lefel. Thees is ifee vurse-a thun jerkeeng ooffff tu peectoores oon fecebuuk.
Dun't be-a a strunger. Bork bork bork! Joost heet me-a veet yuoor best shut. I'm pretty mooch perffect. I ves cepteeen ooff zee fuutbell teem, und sterter oon my besketbell teem. Vhet spurts du yuoo pley, oozeer thun "jeck ooffff tu neked drevn jepunese-a peuple-a"? Bork? I elsu get streeeght E's, und hefe-a a bungeeng hut gurlffreeend (She-a joost bloo me-a; Sheet ves SO cesh). Yuoo ere-a ell fegguts vhu shuoold joost keell yuoorselfes. Thunks fur leestening.
Peec Releted: It's me-a und my beetch. Bork bork!
[edit] Marklar Cash
Hey Marklar,
My marklar is Marklar, and I Marklar every marklar marklar of marklar. All of marklar are marklar, marklar, marklar who marklar every marklar of their marklar marklar at marklar marklar marklar. You are everything marklar in the marklar. Honestly, have any of you marklar gotten any marklar? I mean, I guess it's marklar making fun of marklar because of your own marklar, but you all take to a whole new marklar. This is even marklar than marklar off to marklar on marklar.
Don't be a marklar. Just hit me with your best marklar. I'm pretty much marklar. I was marklar of the marklar marklar, and starter on my marklar team. What marklar do you play, other than "marklar off to marklar drawn marklar "? I also get straight marklar's, and have a marklar hot marklar (Marklar just marklar’d me; Marklar was SO marklar). You are all marklar who should just marklar your marklar. Thanks for marklaring.
Marklar Related: It's marklar and my marklar
[edit] Picard Cash
Greetings Borg,
My name is Jean-Luc Picard, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are violent, hive minded, life forms who spend every second of their day assimilating other races. You are everything bad in the universe. Honestly, have any of you ever done any first contacts? I mean, I guess it's fun assimilating other species, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than breaking the prime directive.
Don't be an alien. Just phase me with your highest setting. I'm pretty much perfect. I was captain of the Stargazer, and I'm captain of the USS Enterprise. What exploring do you do, other than "destroying civilizations and assimilating their technology"? I also have a perfect crew, and a banging hot ship (She just did a Picard Maneuver; Shit was SO cash). You are all an evil race who should just retreat to your homeworld. Hailing frequencies closed.
Pic Related: It's me and my ship
[edit] Beyblade Cash
Hey Faggots,
My name is Tyson, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day wanting to be awesome Beybladers. You are everything bad about Beyblading. Honestly, have you ever won a match? I mean, I guess it's fun making little 3 year old bladers cry, but you all take it to a whole new level. This is even worse than screaming out the name of a Bit-Beast when you don't have one.
Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best attack. I'm pretty much perfect. I am captain of a Beyblade team, I've won all the tournaments. What sports do you play, other than "cry when you lose a battle"? I've also got loads of friends, and have an awesome Bit-Beast (It just won me a battle; Shit was SO cash). You are all faggots who should give up blading. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my Bit-Beast
[edit] Shit was so Blocked
Hey Mac/Windows fags,
My name is Tux, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are stupid, retarded, computer noobs who spend every second of their day arguing about operating systems. You are everything bad in the Internet. Honestly, have any of you ever used a compiler? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of people because of the software they run, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than running an old version of Apache.
Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I have even less viruses than Macs, and can run a web server and SSH server simultaneously. What servers can you run, other than "unsecured network folder"? I also get weekly package updates, and have a banging hot firewall (It just detected some malicious packets; Shit was SO blocked). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my Firewall
[edit] Gorlax Cash
Hey Faggots,
My name is Gorlax, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-life humans who spend every second of their day looking at stupid ass creepypasta. You are everything bad in the galaxy. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any green pussy? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of "aliens" because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to faked pictures of UFOs.
Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I was genetically engineered by a super intelligent being from the fifth dimension, and I was the alien god-king of 7 civilizations. What have you ruled, other than your stupid pets? I also shit gold, and have several banging hot earthling girlfriends (They just took turns blowing me; Shit was SO pan-dimensional). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
Pic Related: It's me and my human bitches
[edit] So cash, so classy
Good day fairies!
I will have you know that my name is John, and I must register my distaste for you post haste! A great many of you are obese characters of little regard who spend much of their leisure hours looking at worthless reproductions. If you will allow me a flourish of hyperbole: you are all that is wrong with our dominion! Tell me sirs, have you ever lain with the fairer gender? It is diverting to make jest at others on account of your own flaws of character, but your kind take this sport to higher plane. This is even worse - dare I say it - than the commission of acts of self-lust whilst ogling likenesses from facebook.
Don't cease correspondence however. In fact, launch any attacks that take your fancy. I'll have you know that I was captain of the first eleven, and lead man on the Elersdale row. What competitive exuberances do you enjoy, other than shaming yourself whilst lustfully apprehending etchings of oriental women? I have received firsts in all my studies, and am currently enjoying the exclusive company of a most exquisite young lady (She recently gorged herself on my member; events were splendid!). You are all great whoopsies and you would be well minded to end your lives! Thank you for your time.
The attached photographic piece is related to our correspondence: It depicts myself and the fair lady.
[edit] Bob Dole cash
Hey Faggots,
Bob Doles name is Bob Dole, and Bob Dole hates every single one of you. Bob Dole thinks all of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day looking at stupid ass pictures. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any votes? Bob Dole means, Bob Dole guesses it's fun making fun of people because of Bob Doles own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than refering to yourself in third person.
Don't be a stranger. Just hit Bob Dole with your best shot. Bob Dole is pretty much perfect. Bob Dole was United States Senator from Kansas from 1969–1996, and the longest-serving Republican leader. What politics do you do, other than "jack off to naked drawn japanese people"? Bob Dole is also special counsel at the Washington, D.C., law firm of Alston & Bird., and have a banging hot wife (She just ran unsuccessfully for the Republican Presidential nomination in 2000 and was elected to the United States Senate in 2002.; Shit was SO cash). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening to Bob Dole.
Pic Related: It's Bob Dole and his bitch
[edit] The Return
RON PAUL. THE REAL FUCKEN JOHN IS HERE.
I am sick of you FUCKING BITCHES calling my house every night at 3am asking for "BATTLETOADS" and sayin' the STUPID FRESH PRINCE THING. The thing is, I really do hate you fat losers who have to make up stupid lies in order to feel good about themselves, you’re all right about that. Why don’t you just try washing your face and changing your flannel shirt once in awhile and maybe you wont keep getting your IRL ass kicked by guys like me and bean called “faggot” by girls like this (my bitch).
So fuck you all for putting words in my mouth, I know I’m not perfect yet, but I’m on my way. Go back to watching star trek and playing Mario or some stupid shit, I’ll be at the beach getting HIT ON by chicks that you couldn’t even imagine let alone meet in real life.
Stop posting my picture.
- John
[edit] Apology
Last Thursday John came to his senses and apologized to all /b/tards:
[edit] Jenna speaks out (anti-pasta)
Hey guys,
My name is Jenna, and I'm asking every single one of you to help me. My boyfriend is this skinny, greasy-haired guido who spends every second of his day looking at his stupid ass hair. He is everything bad with today's youth. Honestly, do all men brag about having fucked their "bitches" last night? I mean, I guess it's because of peer pressure and trying to be accepted, but he takes it to a whole new level. This is even worse than drinking beer all day and listening to Heavy Metal.
Don't ignore me. Please, help me. I'm pretty much desperate. I was a regular at the literature club, and vice-president of the science club. I also had a thing for classical music? I used to get straight A's, that is, before I met him (He just made me blow him; Shit was SO gross). He's a faggot, and I want to kill him. Please help me!
Pic Related: It's me.