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Starblade

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Rare IRL picture of Starblade. Isn't he totally murrypurry?
Rare IRL picture of Starblade. Isn't he totally murrypurry?
 
“ 		 
Fuck you, I'm a dragon
  		„
 

—Starblade Riven Darksquall

Best known for the earthshaking declaration above, Starblade is a 21 year old American male LJ user who believes that HE is a female dragon. He suffers from Asperger's Syndrome and is a schizophrenic, having no ability to differentiate between reality and fiction. He is also a voraphile, pregnophile, otherkin, furry, and plushie lover, and draws terrible fan art which he posts on Elfwood. Like many insane gay furries Starblade is also an Objectivist. And he's into defiling video games by placing them in his anus username.

Contents

[edit] The Beginning

Originally from a voraphile chat, Starblade soon spread like a pandemic disease to a MUD called Alfandria, where he indulged his many fetishes and garnered at least 100 eBoyfriends, all of which he promply lost in a matter of months because he refused to stop obsessing over Palshife. His manipulative behavior and constant whining about Palshife earned him a public stoning, whereupon he fled on the waaambulance from Alfandria with his astral tail tucked between his legs.

Starblade became affiliated with the online (IRC, Forums etc) Draconic community in the first half of 2002, who attempted to gain a foothold in the IRC created project known as Dracogenesis, which contained a collection of computer programmers, who wanted to create a retrovirus that was designed to turn them all into dragons. His only contribution to either the project itself or the Draconic community has appeared to be nothing more than foolish, depressing role-play that ended in unnecessary drama, and his departure from that community.

[edit] The Journal Years

With a face like that, you'd rely on surprise sex too.
With a face like that, you'd rely on surprise sex too.

Months later he showed up on LiveJournal where he spent most of his time writing TL;DR posts about shit nobody cares about and Palshife.

Starblade first came to the attention of many LJ users when he made several posts in debate on the topic of furryism and being a dragon. It is from these posting that the acronym "FYIAD" was born.

[edit] When Aspies Go Missing

After making a series of mysterious and cryptic posts in May of 2004, he disappeared. Many speculated as to what happened to Starbles. Some believed he was arrested, others believed he was committed for his dragon fantasies and his obsessive eStalking of Palshife, while still others believed he was dead. It was agreed upon, however, that he could not have possibly have left the Internets of his own volition.

It was discovered that he paid someone who he thought was Palshife to come from Ohio to have anal sex with him; it turned out to be another pregnovorazoophile friend of his. His promise to "leave the Internet" was enforced by a cruel dominatrix master.

[edit] Mysterious Reappearance

A few months later, Starbles re-appeared as ZeroYellowYoshi, and later still as Starbles. This can be expected to change on a monthly basis as people ferret him out. Currently he has a friends only journal, but occasionally makes public postings. None of them are very interesting and still contain his unique stream of consciousness style of writing.

[edit] Not as Recent as Before

Like a chameleon changing his colors, Starblade makes many claims of himself: he claims he wants to be a mundane, a pseudo-fur, a /b/tard, an Objectivist, and, more recently an Encyclopedia Dramatica user. These changes, of course, stem only from his obsession with Palshife, as he has deluded himself into thinking mimicing him will attract his attention as he latches on to any word or catchphrase Palshife regurgitates.

His most current disappearance can be attributed to his creating yet another persona to hide behind so he can use the word "yiff crazed" at least 100 times to make himself feel good about being a slut.

[edit] Update

Deciding to follow the path of at least 100 furries, he has joined Fur Affinity, and has posted every one of his contacts on his main page. Coincidentally, it's the same user name as his latest Live Journal account. I'm sure he wouldn't mind if you said HAAAYYYY.

AIM: Starblade Enkai MSN: Starblade_Enkai@Hotmail.com ICQ: 266493200 YIM: Starblade_Enkai

Starblade can also be found, albeit inconsistently at http://rp.aryion.com/?startroom=3 under the name, predictably, Starblade.


[edit] Starblade's LiveJournals

Don't bother looking through any of his LiveJournals. If it's not friends only, it will surely be deleted and/or changed, or otherwise deserving of the boring tag.

[edit] Starblade's Encyclopedia Dramatica User Names

Starblade

EdAlBrats (Note the clever use of anagrams to obscure his name.)

Note: this is an article about an Encyclopedia Dramatica user. For more information, please see the appropriate user page. To leave this user a message, please visit User_Talk:Starblade.


[edit] UPDATE

  • [14:21] Anonymous: so, otherkins are pretty much the same as otakuins, right?
  • [14:22] Starblade_Enkai: I dunno.
  • [14:23] Anonymous: do you know what an otakuin is?
  • [14:23] Starblade_Enkai: Yeah, people who think they're from animes.
  • [14:23] Anonymous: yeah
  • [14:23] Anonymous: isint that the same as otherkins?
  • [14:24] Starblade_Enkai: Except otherkins believe they're actual creatures not necessarily from any work of fiction.
  • [14:24] Anonymous: i thought that dragons were fictional
  • [14:24] Starblade_Enkai: They're mythical.
  • [14:24] Starblade_Enkai: That's slightly different.
  • [14:24] Anonymous: how is that differnt?
  • [14:24] Anonymous: its just old fiction.
  • [14:25] Starblade_Enkai: The difference is that back then people thought they were real.
  • [14:25] Anonymous: otakuins think that their anime is real
  • [14:25] Anonymous: wouldnt that make it mythology?
  • [14:25] Starblade_Enkai: In time, maybe, if a large number of people thought that the anime was a real event.
  • [14:25] Starblade_Enkai: And if they had a good excuse to believe it, too.
  • [14:26] Anonymous: im just saying
  • [14:26] Anonymous: the cthulhu mythos is now just that, myth
  • [14:26] Anonymous: its so well written that people belive that it was once a religion
  • [14:26] Anonymous: but it was concived in the 20s, by an author
  • [14:26] Anonymous: a complete work of fiction
  • [14:27] Starblade_Enkai: That's kind of in between.
  • [14:27] Anonymous: howso?
  • [14:27] Anonymous: mythology is nothing but fiction
  • [14:27] Anonymous: i could go out and say that my spirit animal is god, and fit perfectly in both otakins and otherkins
  • [14:27] Starblade_Enkai: Hm...
  • [14:27] Anonymous: because its both myth and fiction
  • [14:27] Anonymous: they are completley interchangable
  • [14:28] Starblade_Enkai: The whole idea of having a soul that is an actual species or is reincarnated or anything like that is like a new age mythology.
  • [14:28] Starblade_Enkai: I think the difference is in how religious people are about it, and how widespread that religion is.
  • [14:29] Starblade_Enkai: Just because something is myth doesn't make it false. It just has to involve some supernatural force.
  • [14:29] Anonymous: but, do you have any proof that a dragon ever existed?
  • [14:29] Starblade_Enkai: Nope.
  • [14:29] Anonymous: then how do you know that you arent living a delusional life?
  • [14:30] Starblade_Enkai: I dunno really. I guess that question ultimately hinges on the metaphysical.
  • [14:30] Starblade_Enkai: What does it mean to exist, to have identity, to be conscious and volitional?
  • [14:31] Anonymous: it means that you are in the physical, in the present, living, breathing and eventually dieing.
  • [14:31] Anonymous: therefore: ceasing to exist.
  • [14:32] Starblade_Enkai: At some point I used to not exist, or at least not as the physical form I am now.
  • [14:32] Starblade_Enkai: How is that any different from death?
  • [14:32] Anonymous: death infers that you once existed.
  • [14:32] Starblade_Enkai: How does the universe know the difference?
  • [14:32] Anonymous: the universe doesnt know anything
  • [14:32] Anonymous: its not concious
  • [14:32] Starblade_Enkai: Exactly.
  • [14:33] Starblade_Enkai: Why does having once existed change the fact that being dead is like not being born yet?
  • [14:33] Anonymous: because, after you die,
  • [14:33] Anonymous: you would have been in the present, you would have lived, and breathed
  • [14:33] Anonymous: those are required to exist.
  • [14:34] Anonymous: therefore: you do not exist before you are born
  • [14:34] Anonymous: much like a dragon. they are an idea. and ideas dont exist.
  • [14:34] Anonymous: and idea is a thought, nothing more.
  • [14:34] Starblade_Enkai: Wait, now hold on. Are you saying that ideas don't have any kind of reality behind them?
  • [14:35] Anonymous: ideas are thoughts, and thoughts are real
  • [14:35] Anonymous: but they dont exist.
  • [14:35] Anonymous: to exist, you have to be physical in the present, and eventually die.
  • [14:37] Starblade_Enkai: Here's another question: Why does it matter that you once existed? Isn't not existing not existing just the same if you have a future of existing and if you have a past of existing?
  • [14:38] Anonymous: nope
  • [14:38] Anonymous: to not exist is just that: to not exist
  • [14:38] Anonymous: something that isint there has no past, present or future
  • [14:38] Anonymous: i would say it does matter, because if dragons dont exist, your living a lie
  • [14:39] Starblade_Enkai: Well what you're saying means there can be no reincarnation. Also what does existence have to do with something that does not exist? If you don't exist, then does it matter what else doesn't exist?
  • [14:40] Anonymous: reincarnation doesnt exist. for it do exist, it would have to live, breahte, be physical and die. all of which are against the whole idea.
  • [14:41] Starblade_Enkai: So morals don't exist. So proof doesn't exist. So science doesn't exist. So philosophy doesn't exist.
  • [14:41] Anonymous: no, yes, yes, no.
  • [14:41] Anonymous: morals are a product of society, a real thought, but they dont exist
  • [14:41] Anonymous: proof is just that, physical proof
  • [14:41] Anonymous: if its physical, it exists
  • [14:41] Anonymous: science is the study of the univerce through the physical
  • [14:41] Anonymous: philosophy is a real idea, but doesnt exist.
  • [14:42] Starblade_Enkai: Jumping doesn't exist.
  • [14:42] Starblade_Enkai: I don't see 'a jumping' anywhere.
  • [14:42] Starblade_Enkai: I can't touch 'a jumping'.
  • [14:42] Anonymous: stand up, flex your knees, release the energy
  • [14:42] Starblade_Enkai: Yeah, but it's not a physical object.
  • [14:42] Anonymous: the act of jumping is in the physical, therefore, it exist.
  • [14:42] Anonymous: exists*
  • [14:43] Starblade_Enkai: Well people practice philosophy, so it exists.
  • [14:43] Anonymous: nope
  • [14:43] Anonymous: thats an idea, ideas dont exist, they are only real.
  • [14:43] Starblade_Enkai: You're using exist idiosyncratically.
  • [14:43] Anonymous: nope.
  • [14:43] Anonymous: real and exist are vastly different
  • [14:43] Anonymous: exist is a measure of space and time
  • [14:44] Anonymous: reality is an ideal
  • [14:44] Anonymous: ideals dont exist, they can only be real
  • [14:44] Anonymous: therefore, reality doesnt exist, its only real.
  • [14:44] Anonymous: and real things dont exist.
  • [14:44] Anonymous: existing things arent real.
  • [14:45] Starblade_Enkai: I think you're drawing a false distinction between something physical and something which represents the pattern of something physical, and something that represents how patterns relate, and something that explains relations, et cetera ad nausium.
  • [14:45] Anonymous: you think incorrectly.
  • [14:46] Anonymous: i think that my arguement is way above your head. i mean, come on. you think your a dragon. someone who belives that sureley cant understand something like this
  • [14:48] Starblade_Enkai: You know that was awfully rude to dismiss my argument like that.
  • [14:48] Anonymous: yeah, well, the truth hurts.
  • [14:49] Starblade_Enkai: Which truth? The truth about me being a dragon, or the truth about you being unable to argue without bringing up completely irrelevant points?
  • [14:49] Anonymous: tell me one thing that i have said that is irrelevent.
  • [14:49] Starblade_Enkai: It's irrelevant to anyone who understands "the fallacy of the stolen concept".
  • [14:50] Starblade_Enkai: How can you argue against me being a dragon when you don't even understand what it means to exist?
  • [14:50] Anonymous: i actually do
  • [14:51] Starblade_Enkai: You're using a form of reducto ad absurdum except you don't realize that my belief that I'm a dragon isn't a logical conclusion of my definition of existing.
  • [14:51] Anonymous: whip out the edragoncock. lets see what you can do.
  • [14:51] Starblade_Enkai: If it was, you'd have a point.
  • [14:52] Anonymous: latin words dont make you sound smart, they make you sound like a furfag. i reduce your point to the absurd just to proove that you really think that you are a dragon, but dragons never existed, therefore, you are living a complete lie, and cannot validate your existance
  • [14:53] Starblade_Enkai: Word salad.
  • [14:53] Starblade_Enkai: tl;dr
  • [14:53] Anonymous: i take my win in the the name of ebaumsworld.
  • [14:53] Starblade_Enkai: LOL whoa... EBAUMSWORLD?
  • [14:54] Starblade_Enkai: They are the Sibe of Atrocity Tourism.
  • [14:54] Starblade_Enkai: Don't get me wrong, Sibe's a nice guy...
  • [14:54] Starblade_Enkai: But he steals from people who deserve to be stolen from, IE Furries.
  • [14:54] Starblade_Enkai: Atrocity Tourism actually makes things that aren't just tracing other people's stuff and calling it art.
  • [14:56] Starblade_Enkai: Except for Ebaums world who hires lawyer prostitutes to get away with stealing things that are actually funny and then claiming that it's their own.
  • [14:58] Starblade_Enkai: As you can see, I'm not your typical otherkin.
  • [14:59] Anonymous: yeah you are.
  • [14:59] Anonymous: a complete pawn for my entertainment
  • [15:00] Starblade_Enkai: Well you're from ebaumsworld.

[edit] RECENT STUFF ADDED

As of August 24th 2007 (Geez, I wonder why he chose THAT date?) Starblade committed e-suicide, IE quit the internet FOREVAR! Except for only an entire year. At least, that's his story. Recent sources tell us that Starblade came back on Valentine's Day, reminded of his internet sweetheart Palshife and came back online, accidentally stalked an alt of Palshife's (the one they call blue feather in russian, or Siniykril) and then, when he found out they were the same, decided to be completely unlike himself (IE honest) and posted an entry saying he failed his year long journey away from la la land.

[edit] EVEN MORE RECENT STUFF ADDED

On May 2nd, 2008, Starblade announced that he quit the internet FOREVAR! Only not right away. Oh, he will still use email, and show up at furry cons, but unlike the other 32,768 times, this one is for REAL AND FOREVAR. REALLY. None of this only-for-a-year crap. And boy, are you going to feel bad when he isn't around FOREVAR. That'll show you. Fuckers.


Starblade is part of a series on  
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Einsteinaspie.jpg Starblade is part of a series on Aspies.

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