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The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya

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Who's your God now?
Who's your God now?
Fanservice: the only reason anyone watches Haruhi
Fanservice: the only reason anyone watches Haruhi
Haruhi wants you to understand that she's just a typical 16-year-old girl FuUck YUow GuUYYz, I SAIDd Posht mOAr hARUhu...
Haruhi wants you to understand that she's just a typical 16-year-old girl FuUck YUow GuUYYz, I SAIDd Posht mOAr hARUhu...
Haruhi was actually the Pink Ranger, WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW?
Haruhi was actually the Pink Ranger, WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW?


Haruhi is an animu that crosses and redefines many genres in such creative fashion. Or, in English, it's all over the place without knowing what it really is, and nobody can understand it. In addition, it is some weeaboo shit that nobody really cares about except cask-strength faggots and career masturbators who will be riding the virginbus forever. It's well-documented that Anonymous both loves and hates Haruhi with a passion. Bringing up Haruhi in 4chan's /a/ (or even /b/ some days) can spark a flamewar. Nothing too epic, but good practice, nonetheless.

Contents

[edit] Plot

The story centers around a 16 year old Japanese schoolgirl named Haruhi (which is Japanese for 'Mary Sue'), who is like God or something and created the world last Thursday. So basically, the other characters have to keep her from getting emo or else she'll destroy the world again with giant robots. To that end, the characters do everything they can to eradicate the drama around her.

So basically, Haruhi thinks that there's like a ton of cool stuff going on when there really isn't, but she could conceivably create all sorts of cool shit, but doesn't because she doesn't know she has the power to begin with.

To help keep herself out of her inane boredom stemmed from the typical Japanese life of a high schooler, Haruhi creates the SOS Brigade, first recruiting the actually normal (and only human), "Kyon" to join her in her crazy and disillusioned escapades to find more retards dumb enough to join her. She next finds Yuki Nagato, a bookworm who seems to be a mute or invalid as she never talks and almost seems like she can't hear for shit, since she's always got her head stuck in some science fiction book or other (probably to hide all the hentai she secretly smuggles in). Next is Mikuru Asahina, a time traveler from the future and more importantly the main source of fanservice for this anime. She is either hated greatly, mostly by girls, or shamelessly lusted after by basement-dwelling, pasty-faced fucktards and perverts who are too secluded from society to go out and enjoy the presence of a real girl now and then (as if a girl could stand being around them to begin with). Lastly, the mandatory "bishounen" of the series is Koizumi Itsuki, an esper who is extremely daft and flaky. It's best not to talk too much to him if you are a guy; he might try and make a move for your dong, if you know what I mean.

Perhaps the most retarded thing about it is that all the episodes are out of order, which was done in an attempt to be "deep" and "interesting", like that movie Memento, but it fails horribly.

Aside from that, there's a whole bunch of stupid Japanese pop culture references that only otakus would get. And everyone dances in the end credits, prompting legions of wapanese(and even real Japanese) to crappily imitate it.

[edit] Fanservice

Because nobody can understand the plot, the creators threw in tons of fanservice. It's basically at the point where Haruhi : fanboys :: Ouran : fangirls. Some argue that the two animu are the same thing in parallel universes, since they have the same protagonist, except that in Haruhi all the girls are hot and all the guys are losers, just the opposite of Ouran.

[edit] Characters

Haruhi - Hyperactive bipolar bisexual Lord of All Creation. Was formerly the the Pink Ranger of the Space Power Rangers.

Kyon - Narrator. Hates everything. Also faps over pictures of Mikuru.

Yuki - Alien. Can fuck up people using hax. The only reason to watch the show.

Mikuru - Loli with giant boobs. They say that. No, really. Also, she's from the future.

Itsuki - Psychic. Gay for Kyon.

[edit] The ever popular Hare Hare Yukai dance

[edit] Moar Stuff

[edit] Copypasta

 
 
you know what I fucking hate?

the melancholy of haruhi suzumiya. it's a great animu and all but people only watch it for the fucking GAY dance at the end. it's all haru haru yukai shit IT'S FUCKING GAY the show talks about the complexity of the universe and shit like that but no one cares they only like the peice of shit dance and gay song thats all there is of it on youtube I haven't seen a single AMV of it that isn't centred around the dance WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?!?!?!?!?!? They're fucking weeaboos. fuck them sigh stupid, stupid people you have people like XDarkred007X uploading meloncoly of haruhi suzumiya and then nothing but shitty dance videos while there's STILL NO EPISODE 11 of season 1!!! but he/she doesn't care because he's TOO FUCKING BUSY UPLOADING DANCE CRAP TO GIVE TWO SHITS!!!!!!!!!
 


 

—A rant/copypasta of a weeaboo

 
 
Yes I'm talking that anime The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya. It fucking sucks. Now it's pretty popular among the anime circles, and yet this poor excuse for an animated feature is the worst thing ever produced by a human being if you except Plan 9 from Outer Space, and I'm being generous.

First you gotta admit you hated the first episode. It made no sense, sucked as shit, wasn't funny, edgy or new. Or original. Animation sucked dead dogs' balls. Characters sucked dead dogs' balls. Voice acting sucked dead dogs' balls. But you managed to make it through the whole pile of steaming poo just to see the ED. Because that's what this anime is about. It's about the ED. Those 1 minute and a half. There's nothing else to it. You went like "OMG ANIMATION LIEK" you freaking retards and now everyone likes it. Yet it's shit. It's complete shit with no redeeming qualities. There's fucking nothing to it. Just the dance at the end. It's a dancing anime. A fucking retarded dancing anime with no story and nothing and no characters it sucks. You shouldn't like it you morons seriously. Just download the ED and loop it on your WMP you cockass faggot asses. DAMN I wish all those threads about HARUHI OMG YEAH would go one and everyone in them die FUCK YOU for polluting my forums HARUHI FUCK YOU.
 


 

—Anonymous

Image:pikajewsprite.gif The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya is part of a series on Anime.

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