BitTorrent
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Bittorent is a peer-to-peer porn file sharing protocol used by basement dwelling virgins to download massive amounts of furfuckery and yiffporn. It is probably the most common protocol for transferring the insanely large folders of yaoi back and forth over the internet. Other common files that are transferred over the bittorrent protocol include hentai, tentacle rape porn, amputee porn, pedoporn, dutch porn, and snuff porn. It is estimated that over 35% of the internet’s traffic is found on the bittorrent protocol. It will rape your internet connection so good your ISP will probably cock block you.
Contents |
History
Bittorrent was created in 2001 by programmer Bram Cohen who kept this magic under wraps for two months. Finally, after realizing that he would need more people using the protocol so that he could download his warez, loli, and illegally shared music files faster, he uncorked this genie from it's bottle and the internet has not been the same since.
How Bittorrent Works
The initial owner of a porn file will make what is called a torrent. He then uses this torrent to seed his perversity to other perverts around the world. Each pervert who downloads the initial seed also uploads the pornographic data at the same time, this leads to a very fast and efficient way to distribute your Japanese vomit porn to all of your friends. As each downloader completes the initial seed, they also begin seeding the files. This exponentially increases the downloading speed for the rest of the depraved old men who are looking for pictures or videos of your little sister dancing with a Sharpie in her ass in front of her webcam. The more seeds there are, the faster you get to beat off.
Bittorrent Clients
There are approximately eleventy-billion Bittorrent clients available. Here is a brief list of popular clients:
| Client | What can you get with it? | Is it full of spyware? |
| ABC | porn, movies, warez,mp3s | no |
| BitComet | porn, movies, warez,mp3s | yes |
| BitLord | porn, movies, warez,mp3s | yes |
| BitTornado | porn, movies, warez,mp3s | yes |
| Deluge | porn, movies, warez,mp3s | yes |
| Gnome Bittorrent | porn, movies, warez,mp3s | yes |
| LimeWire | porn, movies, warez,mp3s | yes |
| Transmission | porn, movies, warez,mp3s | yes |
| Vuse | porn, movies, warez,mp3s | yes |
| µTorrent | porn, movies, warez,mp3s | no |
Opponents of Bittorrent
Anybody smart enough to get out of the http and ftp league will, with any luck, make Bittorrent his preferred way of attaining pr0n. Luckily, it doesn't take much brain, and due to frequent copyright crackdowns Bittorrent is a drama generator like no other. If it gets shut down the world would witness a drama explosion of such epic magnitude and proportion that Chernobyl would look like a urinal cake in comparison.
In most countries, it is highly illegal to distribute copyrighted material without the permission of the copyright holder. Because of the potential for people to try music albums or watch movies prior to purchasing them, copyright holders hate Bittorrent. Because of Bittorrent, users are now capable of sifting through the 99% crap that copyright holders dish out on the unsuspecting public, and actually enjoy what they watch or listen to.
Many opponents of the Bittorrent protocol like to use the argument that "You wouldn't download a car" as an example of why a person should not use a Bittorrent client to download illegal files. This argument is rather silly though, considering the fact that if you actually used the Bittorrent protocol to download a car, you could quite possibly end up dead or severely injured due to an automobile flying out of your router. Also, if it were possible, yes, yes you would.
Aaron... YOU ARE A PIRATE!!!
<Aaron> just remember. it's ok to steal hearts, why isn't it ok to steal photoshop? without hearts we die.
Doesn't that seem more sacred?
Even IRC has pirates!!!
«10:32:05» Aaron: !piracy
«10:32:06» fayzeshyfft: YARRRRRRR, you're a pirate now Aaron ! http://www.demonoid.com/
(IT'S BACK BITCHES!!!) & http://thepiratebay.org/ & http://scrapetorrent.com/
& http://torrentreactor.net/ & http://torrentbox.com/ & http://www.fulldls.com/
& http://www.completorrent.com/ & http://torrents.to/ & http://www.btmon.com/
& http://btjunkie.org/ & http://isohunt.com/ & http://sumotorrent.com/
Trackers
Just what is a torrent tracker? A Bittorrent tracker is a main server which assists you in downloading all the CP and Dirty Sanchez porn you could ever imagine. A tracker will serve your IP to random people who want to fap to the same porn that you do. Be careful, Mike Sandy can get a hold of your IP. The owners of such Tracker servers feel it necessary to remind you that downloading copyright software, movies, music, and porn is an illegal offense, and that they do not actually have any of those files on the server.
If you use public trackers you will get in jail where Bubba will give you extreme rape for your ghastly crimes against welfare of multi-billionaire "artists" like Snoop Dogg.
A private tracker is a tracker that only snobs can use. They are generally restricted by passwords and the users are carefully watched to ensure that they are breaking the law just as much as everybody else is. If you use private trackers you're going to get it from nazi ego-maniac moderators.
Popular Bittorent Sites
Just as there are several Bittorrent clients to download your sick fetish porn, there are also several Bittorrent tracker sites from which to choose from. Here is a brief (and I mean really brief) list of active tracker sites.
- Anontrack - tracker of the Anon
- Isohunt
- Bitsoup
- Demonoid
- BiteNova
- Torrent Portal
- The Pirate Bay
lol sold out to the "man"Deal fell through. - Torrentscan
- Torrentmatrix
- Mininova
- BTJunkie
- Torrentreactor
- Torrent Pond - an engine that searches all the popular tracker sites so you can be even lazier
What Is Bittorrent To You?
Bittorrent is a lot of things to a lot of people. The protocol has opened up the internet to millions of users. It allows the average nerd to see things that were previously held unseeable at a faster rate than ever before. Here are some random thoughts on what the Bittorrent protocol means to the average user:
- Hawley: bittorrent is my means to aquire vast ammounts of contraband...and sex education films
- Hawley: its a faboulous way to like get lots of porno -- thats the gay answer
- wax: its a stage in the quest for perfection in the dissemination of information
- einsidler: bittorrent is the thing that is holding back on my gay porn right now.
- wax: DOES BITTORRENT VIOLATE THE LAWS OF NATURE?!
- OldDirtyBtard: dan: bittorrent means i can steal from my former employers, the jews who run the record companies. Since they didn't compensate me properly, and they rip off the alleged 'artists.' I think my piracy is just.
- OldDirtyBtard: bittorrrent means never having to say: "i just wasted $20 on the kanye west album"
- OldDirtyBtard: bittorent means i dont have to watch people trying to sell me stuff during a recession while i'm watching my fave shows
- Valerie: to me bittorrent is a way to share files easily and quickly to many people at once without worrying about hosting fees or the RIAAfags too much.
- azariel: i actually USE BITTORNENT to get movies with vampires who have boners.
- ddog: bittorrent means never having to jerk off to the same thing twice, dan.
- cancerrr: dan, its that download thingy.
- flouch: it means i don't have to leave the house, for anything, even a car.
- tfo: it means that I can skim the best music of the past forty years without paying for a fucking thing, and spend that cash on other things instead. GREED IS GOOD.
