Trying too hard
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
The internets can be a difficult place to fit in. And before they were invented, the real world was often a pretty difficult place to fit in, as well. Ever since the first cavemen invented faggotry and awkwardness, socially inept people have desperately tried to fit in with their siblings. This has always resulted in epic fail because they are trying. Too. Fucking. Hard.
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Why do people try so goddamn hard?
The various reasons for this usually revolve around wanting to be popular, be it to pick up girls, earn EPoints or simply make friends because you don't want to die alone, choking on ramen in front of your computer. Trying Too Hard is usually a result of the following process:
- Realizing you're a pathetic loser
- Realizing some people, on the other hand, are not
- Identifying their actions/behaviors that you believe explain their popularity
- Attempting to repeat said actions/behavior in the hope of instantly becoming popular yourself
- ????
-
No. No profit.FUCKING PROFIT!!!!
This might look like a foolproof method, but it consistently results in much butthurt and/or making friends with other losers. People who Try Too Hard make grade-A lolcows, with the added benefit that they'll just keep on trying and providing enough lulz to power New York City. Because they're so fucking desperate.
Examples of Trying Too Hard in Meatspace
- Quoting internet memes during regular conversation. There's always that fucking idiot, who, in mid conversation, will say things like "PWNED!", "LEET!", "EPIC FAIL!", etc. Don't be that fucking guy.
- Wearing T-shirts with witty slogans, in the hope that people will actually believe you're a funny person and appreciate you
- Playing guitar in the dorm, in the hope that people will actually believe you're an artist and love you
- Quoting movies or books whenever possible, in the hope that people will actually believe you're smart and admire you
- Acting cheerful, in the hope that people will actually want to hang out with you
- Acting sad, in the hope that people will actually believe you're mysterious
- Acting nice, in the hope that people will forget you have no personality, and maybe even cuddle
- Acting like an asshole, in the hope that people will forget you have no balls, and maybe even respect you
- Getting a Mudkip tattoo.
- Attending Anime conventions
- Talking very loudly about your hobbies or the latest book you read, hoping your conversation will be overheard and you'll make new friends
- Using and mentioning whatever expensive gadget you just bought, in such a way that others are forced to acknowledge that yes, you are a very trendy and "in" person
- Wearing your pants below your knees because it's what all the cool kids are doing.
Examples of Trying Too Hard OTI
- Adding gajillions of "friends" to your account on social networking websites
- Using memes and/or netspeak incorrectly because you want to appear "in" while being too lazy to acquire your internet license
- Contributing to ED by creating links to "at least 100", "over 9000" or "an hero" on EVERY FUCKING PAGE
- Uploading pics of your ex/that kid you don't like from your school/some random whore from MySpace to ED and then adding them to degrading articles as an attempt at revenge
- Replacing every exclamation mark you ever type with "!!!1"
- stating in your blog that you've gone through 10 journals in the past two years and stating, "thinking is a hobby of mine, you should try it sometime" just so people will be deceived into believing that you actually are thoughtful
- Quitting IRC forever
- Trying to jam your stupid ideas down Anonymous' throat
- Posting shitty pics on DeviantART so that people will like you (SPOILER ALERT: you'll die alone anyway)
- Asking for comments on said pictures every 2 seconds (SPOILER ALERT: Nobody cares)
- Saying "That's photoshopped!" everytime you see a picture, so that people won't think you're gullible
- Posting pics of your bleeding wrists so that... uh... wait, why do people even fucking do that?
- Attempting to troll people by getting involved in long-winded arguments that end up taking more of your time than theirs (SPOILER ALERT: you have trolled yourself, lol)
- Turning every online argument into a Linux vs. Microsoft debate
- Saying "btw that was sarcasm" every time you're being sarcastic
- Using MySpace
- Uncyclopedia
If someone has linked you here
You're a shallow and pathetic piece of shit, most people hate you and you should consider visiting warmer climates, such as hell. The only reason this doesn't read "everyone hates you" is because that jewish cockpuncher Jesus loves everyone, so you're pretty lucky. Any actual human beings who don't hate you are simply losers just like yourself, who are after your pity friendship in the exact same way you're after theirs. Enjoy your symbiotic fail. Everyone hates you. everyone fucking hates you and your mom
Do you repent?
If you're one such loser and wish to change your ways, here are a few starters. Read very carefully.
- "No one cares about my pathetic existence". Repeat this to yourself every time you're about to interact with another person.
- "Hm, am I actually any good at this?" Ask yourself this question every time you're about to create content (music, writing, drawing, whatever). If you answered "no", you are correct. If you answered "yes", ask for confirmation from random strangers, because imaginary friends always say yes.
- "Does it actually matter if this person doesn't like me?" Ask yourself this question every time you get laughed at for being such a goddamn retard. Consider whether it's worth trying to convince your tormentors that they are wrong, taking into account the fact that any such attempt will almost certainly result in getting laughed at even more.
- "Hasn't this joke been made like twenty billion times already?" Ask yourself this question every time you're about to make yet another of your clumsy attempts at humor, e.g. posting "I for one welcome a beowulf cluster of our soviet russian overlords" or "That's a good car analogy, but does it run Linux and Duke Nukem Forever? on Slashdot.
Gallery of Fail
 Oh my. |
 If you photoshop yourself onto the cover of Rolling Stone, you're trying too hard. |
 Sometimes >9000 hours in MSPaint is accurate. |
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 Using a lot of memes and not making any sense would definitely be trying too hard. |
 As is posting followups to that screencap... |
 Yep, there's still more... |
 This conversation about sums up trying too hard. |
 Cars seems to attract over-achievers. |
 Sound system for creating "phat" engine noise included. |
 Tartlet tries too hard. |
 ...since 1972. |
 With an ass like that, this doesn't count! |
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 o_0 >_< ;_; |
 Not only trying WAY too hard but also fail. |
See Also
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Trying too hard is part of a series on the cancer that is killing /b/. |
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