User:Acai Blast

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

Hey!		This user hasn't edited much, but they show great potential. You can help fit them for a top-notch pair of lollerskates by providing constructive crisisim on their edits and vandalizing the user pages of unhelpful assholes. See this user on RC? Want to help them? Sign in then, dumbass!

NOTICE ME

This user has a penis.

This asshole is a grammar nazi.

This faggot is a professional cock sucker.

This angry homo would eat Lady Gaga's pussy, even though he loves the dick.

This user loves men with beards. (Not neckbeards.)

This cunt likes to post in French, Italian, Spanish and Russian. But only in section titles.

Hello, my name is Acai_Blast. Yes... I'm named after the soft antioxidant chew... It's pronounced "Ah-Sigh-Eee" Blast. Not "Awe-sigh"... not "Ass-say"... and definitely not "Ack-Eye". I'll love you forever if you pronounce my name right. But I doubt I'll ever hear you say that, so ignore everything after "chew" until "mroe".

Mroe abuot meh

This user is made of win and awesome. Acai Blast is completely awesome, and is immune to your faggotry.

Even though I may like whatever I'm mocking, I still do it for the lulz. But I still liek it. Like Lady Gaga. I luff her, but I still make fun of her. It's a love-hate relationship. Actually, it's love-love. I'm a totally down to earth guy. I'm sweet, and kind, and I love to cuddle up with my boyfriends whilst watching a good movie.

I also tend to separate my fandom from what I do here. I don't want somebody to post on my talk page and say "HEY UR NOT A FAN OF LADY AGAG BCUZ UR TALKUING BAD ABT HER". I can get lulz from things I love, just as easily as I poke fun at things I don't like. I'm not a hypocrite, I am just one with the lulz.

Remember, before I am a Lady Gaga fan, I am a LULZ Patriot.

But DO NOT, under any circumstance, talk bad about Acai Blast soft antioxidant chews! They are delicious, and they are very good for you. :3

Things I Fucking Love

• Boxxy (but not like those faggots with the AIDS who post her everywhere.)
• Lady GaGa (I luff her.)
• Gimmeabreakman (If I lived in Japan, I'd fuck this guy silly.)
• Mr. Safety (Even though he's a moron.)
• Cock (I love cocks of all shapes, sizes, colors, and... what other adjectives are there?)
• Your Daddy (I make your daddy cum every night, babe.)

Shit I Fucking Hate

This pretty much looks like me when I see pages written like Uncyclopedia.

If I think you suck, I'll say so. There are users here (whose names escape me right now) who write articles as if they just came out of Uncyclopedia/ I'd actually like to make a template or userbox that says "this user sounds like an Uncyclopedian". I HATE poorly written articles. I pretty much ran my school newspaper, so I know what's a good article, and what is pure shit.

I really fucking hate Uncyclopedia-like articles. It makes me want to fucking scream until I start choking on my own blood and bile. I know I sound like a lolcow, but that's the truth! It's like all these fucking cancerous newfag faggots got bored with Uncyclopedia and came over to Encyclopedia Dramatica, but they think Encyclopedia Dramatica and Uncyclopedia are the same shit, so they write the same unfunny types of articles. It's like some stupid emo piece of shit faggot who loves Guitar Hero, gets bored with his stupid game, gets a real guitar and starts hanging out with professional guitar players, yet has no idea how to play a real guitar. Do you see what I mean? FFFUUUCCCKKK!!!

But this is about the only thing that really pisses me off. And, to be completely honest, I really only hate the ignorant aspect of Uncyclopedia. Nothing turns me off more than people who don't know what the hell they're talking about. I think it's funny to point out what's really and honestly wrong with subject of the the article than to say Mariah Carey came from Mars and was banished because of her freakishly deep voice. That is not funnay, you guize.

Bad Grammar! Oh, yes. Especially when people type "should of" instead of the correct "should have". Just because it sounds like it, it doesn't mean it is. I also don't like ending two consecutive sentences with the same word. It drives me crazy to see that word.

Oh, and I also hate when people use the word "hater". It makes you look stupid. HATERS, HATERS, HATEY HATE HATERS.

Never mind. There are too many unfunny cancerous newfag faggots to get rid of them all. Oh god the newfags are still here!!!! WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE THAT CAN SEE THEM????

I'm also sick of those fucking cunts who keep naming shit following the stupid "2girls1cup" format. 1man1jar? 2guys1horse? Please kill yourself. :)

/lolcow

Trolling Methods

When I troll some random lolcow, I ALWAYS make subtle references to past memes and lolcows. That'll let you know that I'm not being for real, because sometimes I get nice with the victim, much like luring. So don't fuck it up! Variations of known lolcow quotes include:

• I HATE MY HUGE RETARDED FANBASE
• THIS IS A VIOLATION OF ETHNIC STANDERS
• YOU MAY BE MAINSTREAM BUT YOU WILL NEVER BE AN ORIGINAL

Variations of these quotes are not uncommon when I try to seduce my prey. I really only do that shit to let other seasoned trolls that I'm also a troll, so it doesn't turn into a case of Trolls Trolling Trolls.

Encyclopedia Dramatica

These are some lists of my favorite users, favorite articles, and contributions to Encyclopedia Dramatica.

Favorite ED Users

• User:Jdire Jdire is bad ass.

Favorite Articles

• DivineAngel (She's a fucking loser.)
• Snapesnogger (Does this need a reason?)
• Angry Homo Kid (This needs no explanation.)
• Lady GaGa (I check this page frequently to keep the influx of lulz higher than the unfunny cancer that newfags put in it.)

Articles I Made

• TinEye (My baby. Sorry if I sound like I get defensive over it, it's just that I created the article and I feel like I'm its daddy. I think TinEye still sucks, though.)

Vidéos Préférées de Acai

My Favorite Pictures

I love pictures. Of cocks. And hot chicks, but nobody cares about that.

I like the Y thing for the W sound. You'd understand if you knew the Cyrillic alphabet...	I think this is hot, even though this guy can't give a blowjob to save his life.	I love this whore; she's fabulous.	This is my penis.
One of the wieners I've had in my mouth.	I thought this was funny, but I just found one like it on the Google page.	Isn't he cute?! His name is Edu Boxer.