User:Jack Phoenix
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
HAI2U!
I'm Jack Phoenix Manhwa from Italy, you may know me further by looking on this awesome resume I made just for you.
I like, in first instance:
- black metal and heavy metal in general, and am myself a drummer;
- professional wrestling, and watch it for the sport, not for the greasy musclemen;
- teh pr0nz, and watch it for the bitches, not for the greasy cocks like you do;
- hentai animu and manga with special penchant for LI material, anal sex and bukkake on chocolate cakes, exclusively on wimminz;
- "your mom"-jokes;
- your mom, that despite having a retard like you to care for, has still the lust flame and body frame to make scantily-clad nocturnal volunteering on the cold streets under my home. Yeah, if it ain't your mom's body, it will be the young cock-craving of your 16 years old sister. Like I care the muscle tone of a bitch's tits as long as she sucks;
- my country;
- putting a lot of links like this thinking it's funny;
plus a thousand more things (did I mention your mom?), that you'll learn by knowing me through my talk page.
Yeah, right; that's the only way to contact me through ED, since a trip to the IRC #ed channel has ended in tragical 10-second drama and I was instantly banhammered for answering a stupidly asked question like a bot would have and being mistaken by one.
Unlucky, I wasn't smart enough to activate logging of the interchange, so it'll remain one of the unsolved mysteries of life for me. Maybe someone takes ban power a bit too fucking seriously nowadays. BREAKING NEWS: It happened again somehow, without me actually not saying a single word. Srsly, get a grip.
I'm planning to take up some poor-shit written "satire" about generic stuff ED is full of - retarded 12 years old kids that think writing obsessively "fag" on anything they see is funny - and pulling it to new heights of lulz as long as I can.
Either way, I advise you not to fuck with an Italian, we have the most violent hooliganz of the world and the longest-lasting criminal organization God ever left you to witness the power of. Just look at your back. Luigi Capone is ready with a luchador mask and a nice, smooth lead pipe waiting for you to turn and make it enlarge your eye sockets someway that you'd never thought was possible before!
Jack Phoenix 16:45, 20 April 2007 (UTC)

