War on drugs
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Originally called "The shorthanded skirmish against illegal substances which may or may not cause harm to somebody", the war on drugs is a US war waged by the man for lulz and booze money, mainly on smelly pot smoking hippies in the mid 70s in the hope of turning them from useless hippies that spend all their welfare money on imported drugs into useless yuppies that spend all their easy earned money on imported furniture from Europe and Japan.The war on drugs was later described by graduates of the school of friggin obvious as "...a slutty waste of public funds which could have been better spent on oversized golden calfs dropped randomly by stealth bombers over Canada."
Contents |
[edit] Flow-chart of a typical war on drugs
- jews dispense welfare
- take welfare check
- buy durgs
- do durg-associated crimes
- more wood for the drug-war fire
- ???
- government profit!!
- welfare marginalized
- jews = happy
- goto 1
[edit] Arguments against the war on drugs
- It costs multiple metric fucktons of taxpayer money
- It has contributed to the largest prison population in world history
- There has never been any evidence that it has done anything to meet its stated goals
- It has left us with a bunch of unemployable ex-convicts
- Making something popular illegal makes it expensive, allowing even the smelliest Mexican douchebags to produce trailers full of cash just by carrying stuff from one place to another and occasionally murdering competitors/bystanders
- The murder rate suddenly doubled during prohibition, and dropped steeply after its repeal; the same thing happened in the 70s (though it has not yet dropped from that rate) for COMPLETELY UNKNOWN reasons, since the two are not even remotely similar
- Goatse
- Drugs not sold by legal companies (like how walmart sells tobbaco) are cut and tanted by AIDS
- Lulzkill. Junkies are funny when they have drugs.
[edit] Arguments for the war on drugs
- Serious entertainment and on-the-job training for US special forces.
- Linear time is lie.
- When ingesting cocaine, an otherwise placid Negro will, due to his Transformer ancestry, temporarily become a cocainzed super-negro and go on a sexual rampage door to door, raping one white woman after another. Proof.
[edit] Casualties
With the odd exception of a dozen or so government employed advertising agencies and the occasional Latin American government, the war on drugs has proved to be America's most light-hearted war to date.
