White People

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

(Redirected from White)

Encyclopedia dramatica is frequently accused of being racist. This article proves not only that ED makes fun of ALL races equally but also proves that mocking white people for being the elitist, self-righteous crackers they are is not an act of racism.

Average "hawt" white girl. I'd hit that. In retaliation for eating all my biscuits.

White people have unusually small cocks.

This article is sponsored by the Nazi Resistance Association NRA and NAMBLA

It is widely known that white people are the inferior race. It is well-documented that white people are the genetic version of trickle-down economics. Starting out as robust black hominids several million years ago in modern-day Africa, the weaker tribes were driven north into Europe where they evolved into rugged but dimwitted neanderthals while the intellectual and artistic homo sapiens were evolving in Africa. Eventually homo sapien explorers made their way to Europe where they encountered this alternative species of human. As these explorers were primarily males that hadn't been laid in months, they had little choice but to breed with the neanderthal women creating the modern white, or caucasian race. It is not a coincidence that the only countries that produce people with light skin, hair, and eyes are the same countries where the only neanderthal fossils have been found. Early in human history a small group of whites in Greece and Italy who had more homo sapien blood than their contemporaries in northern Europe actually began to develop civilized culture. This however angered the northern Europeans so much that they decided to invade the Greek and Roman cities and teach the "race traitors" about real white heritage as taught by their neanderthal forefathers; beating, destroying, or burning anything you aren't intelligent enough to understand, thus begining the Dark Ages.

White people are under the delusion that they are superior. As they have been educated stupid since their first forays into civilization, this is not surprising. One good thing about the white race is their ability to blindly follow their leaders in perfect lockstep, however ridiculous the instructions might sound. This has allowed the white man to become a useful idiot and scapegoat for the real perpetrators of The Plan.

History

Typical white leaders

White people are at the bottom of the genome tree of human evolution.

Typical middle class suburbs that Whitey believes is the apex of human civilization.

They breed prodigiously, like rats. Especially the Mormons.

The purest Caucasians (the people of the Caucasus Mountains) look like this.

Throughout history, the white man has been consistent in one thing. Rewriting history. Enslaved by Moors, conquered by Egyptians, sold as sex-slaves by sheiks - had these facts not been expunged from their history books, their children might have escaped the current yoke of white guilt.

Inventions

Almost every invention purported to be created by white people was actually stolen from one of the pure races.

Freedom & Constitutional Democracy, stolen from olive-skinned Greeks
Geography - Chinese
Schools - Egyptians
Chemistry - Arabs
Slavery - Turks
Mathematics - Aztecs or Mayas
Medicine - stolen from yellow-skinned Siberians

However, white people have invented some items of note.

Caucasian Behaviour

White flag

Average "handsome" middle-class white guy, obviously much better than those poor whiteys.

The male specimen tends to be a redneck, a Tool fan, a frat boy or an emo. During the day they travel in packs to the mall or travel alone in search of anything to molest. At night, the emofag cuts itself, the redneck posts on YouTube or MySpace, the Tool fan listens to terrible music and the frat boy goes on a rape spree and/or gets humjobs from freshman pledges. Most white people can be found on Youtube leaving racial comments on rap videos because they believe they are changing the world.

The female specimen begins the adult lifecycle as a 16 year old girl, though can more often be found in their final form, hovering near a beer tap. During the day they flock together to look for clothes or fattening food, then get on Facebook or MySpace, to bask in the glow of unwarranted self-importance. At night they busy themselves being almost raped and working on their careers.

Sex

Average suburban Whitey teenage male doing average Whitey teenage things, like raping your neighbor's dog

Whiteys are world-renowned rapists and dabblers in all sorts of sexual perversion. White men rape children in Asia, and take sex slaves from Africa and South America. The white man is not above having sex with dogs or taking it in the ass from horses. Not surprisingly, white women are known for preferring black 12-inch cock over tiny 2-inch white cocks, and sometimes for having extreme fetishes and dying from bizarre sexual acts.

Food

Amongst white people, greasy, nutritionally-barren bland food is the norm. Hamburgers, Americanized "Mexican Food", and the ubiquitous all-you-can-eat buffet are essential to the white American diet. Picture if you will a 500-pound fat fuck who is actually malnourished, living amongst a pile of McDonald's wrappers and shitty discarded underwear while drinking a Diet Coke. Nothing beats good-old white ingenuity! Less than most white people may be seen eating such foods as corn, pees, broccoli, or even boiled chicken also known as firm, one piece, shit.

Shelter

White people tend to congregate outside of cities in large developments of houses that look completely bland and alike. Their brains lack the ability to grasp new concepts, so they are frightened and disturbed by anything unusual or requiring complex thought to understand. It is because of this that whites create large housing developments with strict rules - the stricter the rules, the less thought required. Whitey is also known to chill under specially designated white trees.

Religion

Most white people are Christian of one stripe or another, which makes perfect sense, as it was stolen entirely from Judaism. If not Christian, they've probably chosen Atheism, which often means you are dealing with a liberal. Tread carefully.

Clothing

In the summertime, white people, especially the middle-aged ones, will inevitably wear inappropriately short shorts to show off their marmalade-like, shapeless legs. They seem to think other people enjoy seeing these varicose vein-riddled blobs of uncooked dough, but they are badly mistaken.

White Culture

As white people have no native culture, they are forced to co-opt bits and pieces from every other society in the world, simultaneously combining them into a horrible mishmash of 'diversity' while ruining the original.

Music

Whites claim to have created rock music, but again, all they did was steal it from the black man. Jazz was created by blacks so that white people couldn't come along and ruin it, but even that has been gentrified. The current assault on black music by the white man is readily apparent.

White Dances

White people square dance, which is a highly structured form of a redneck mating ritual. Still taught in schools, this staple of Americana could not be more aptly named. Junior proms and senior balls are the main thrust of population growth among the entire economic scale of the white population. Another form of melanin-deficient dance is called ballet, which comes from the french for 'see my taint'. This is done on stage wearing pantyhose.

White Pride

Moar info: White Nationalism.

Whitey In Action

Wow incest,trailerparks,and beer all in one incident

Typical white couple

Previous Video | Next Video

They all look the same to me

As a subset of the Cauc asian race, whitey includes a plethora of diverse backgrounds which include the peoples of Romania, Spain, Sweden, Russia and the Middle East. However, inbreeding is rampant, as evidenced by the various distinct facial features of whites (huge foreheads, long thin crooked noses, eyes too close together, &c.), their ability to become grossly overweight, and the existence of gingers.

Not all White People Are White

Don't know if white...

See also Caucasiaplasty

Despite the degrading implications that come with being associated with the white race, there are still those who take pride in pretending they are at least loosely associated with this perverted species of rapists and plunderers. Some examples include:

Coconut: Brown on the outside; white on the inside. May be Pakis, spooks, or Beaners.
Oreo: Black on the outside; white on the inside.
Apple: Red on the outside; white on the inside.
Twinkie or Banana: Yellow on the outside; white on the inside.

Politically Correct Alternatives to "White"

Cocksauce
Cracker
Hick
Hillbilly
Honkey
Whitey
Hoosier
Pea-pickers
Dick sucker
Redneck
Trailer trash
Rabbi
Wigger
Chav
White Trash
Fishbelly
Maggot
Wapanese

Conclusion

White men are self-loathing turds who are afraid of everything, including themselves. They hate black people because they supposedly aren't productive enough in society. So the douchebags should love the Jews right? No; the insecure pussies hate them too because they fucking beat them at their own shit. Same with Asians, they hate them because they’re too smart. You never hear Asians whining like goddamn white retards do about blacks getting affirmative action. Mexicans want to come here to WORK. They’ll steal the job at McDonald’s you hate. Life must be unbearable as a melanin-deficient. Enjoy reveling in your past achievements. Soon white people will have nothing to do, while blacks fuck their women, Jews, Asians and women run everything, and Mexicans take the skilled labor as the tech jobs go to India. Oppression can only hide your inadequacies for so long. White people are too sencitive - they cry about things that normal (Black, Jewish, Asian) people don't give a shit about. White people are like evil aliens, but they fail at everything.

Gallery

White folk family album

Typical residence of whiteys.

White people are a nomadic folk.

Nigger vs. Honky. Go for broke.

Vital for when white suburban youth attend "rap" concerts.

Use these to look more intimidating with kung fu skills.	Typical white family.	Caucasian mating ritual.
Blacks are rumored to harbor resentment against whitey for some strange reason.	Tipical whitey.		Typical white nerd.
Whites in their natural habitat.	Passtime of the Master Race.	Sneaking into the women's shower room.	Fucking dead cats.
Typical straight white buddies.	Going to McDonald's.	Stormfront illustrated.	White mating.
Typical white penis size	White women prefer black dicks for a reason.	White dick is no match for black dick.	White Trash beauty queen: From the failed "Girls of the Buffet" spread
White people suck!!!	Whitey gets nervous around black folks.	White men get raped quite often.