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White Knighting
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
White Knighting refers to the misguided online defense of attention whores, ""artists", or douchebags, all under the pretense of supposed compassion. In other words, White Knighting is to troll a troll, but most often unwittingly. The phenomenon is a typified by feigning moral highground, a manner of "rooting for the underdog", only with a sickeningly lame undertone of conscience-cleansing martyrdom. The White Knight hopes that his or her supposed sympathy and resulting impetuous defense will give them a leg up over their heartless peers, as if the individual they're sticking up for will then imbue them with an air of sainthood. In the end, all White Knighting usually does it to merge the fail of the White Knight's target with White Knight themselves, creating an even bigger clusterfuck of retardedness. A White Knight may also be referred to as a halo-grubber, but doing so will make you look like an idiot.
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[edit] Psychology of the White Knight
Sticking up for someone who's being harassed IRL will most often yield positive results. The Internets, though, is a different story. Nobody is forcing you to post your gay furry shit to the Internets. So if you do, prepare to get beecocked. Likewise, any other social faux pas that doesn't deserve getting your ass beat in real life is totally fair game online, because nobody put a gun to your head and said "Type dis shit, or you're dead!", so the mockery you receive is completely justified. Suffering in the real world is serious business because it can actually kill you, whereas the internet is basically a vacuum of words, numbers and pictures. As such, because your online adventures were totally optional, anybody who stands up for the garbage you just posted looks like a douchefag. White Knighting thus exposes itself as a pathetic attempt at social mobility. ON THE INTERNET.
In most cases, a White Knight will also possess whatever crippling social disorder their victim has, providing him or her with all the empathy they need to create a special online friendship with their newfound chum. Unfortunately, their supposed "bond" becomes increasingly obvious when this individual is of the opposite sex. Suddenly the relationship goes from bully savior to conniving predator, as the White Knight uses their chivalrous deeds as leverage for sex. The image of the dashing /b/tard, sweeping their aspergers-diagnosed damsel off in their tattoo-covered, hillbilly arms, is too powerful an incentive to resist, so they go to great pains to flatter their victim and make them feel loved. This is, of course, this is essentially just a delusional and pathetic machination to get into their cavernous panties, but when you're a furry filmmaker making less than $40,000 a year in your 30s, your standards will have to end up lower than your credit rating.
White Knighting is also commonly attributed to Internet Tough Guys, but they do White Knights a service by actually looking like they might possess balls (though they really don't). Their philosophy states that if you're going to defend some jerk-off's right to free speech that no one else is allowed to speak out against, you have to do it in ALL CAPS and with swears or %#%*^@!s every few lines. You also need to post gigantic, barely-literate blocks of text that boast about the job (i.e. trucking company) you actually work for, and that girlfriend you actually have and who actually isn't a meth addict.
[edit] Common White Knighting Locations
White Knights and their sycophantic schemes are typically found on message boards, blogs, or other social networking sites. The ones most frequented by these irritants are:
- Something Awful
- Gaia
- i-mockery.com
- DevianTART
- Myspace
- YouTube comments
- Enturbulation
- Newfags supporting camwhores on /b/
- /r9gay/
- IMDB
- Newgrounds
...almost everywhere in our Web 2.0 world.
[edit] See Also
- Moralfag
- Internet Tough Guy
- Unwarranted self-importance
- Unrealistic expectations
- Internet Vigilante Group
[edit] Examples of White Knighting on the Internets
- Awfulvision Exposé: Gone too far?
- Lurkerbunny's Last Journal Entry
- Chris Crocker in all his glory -- An old but classic example of White Knighting distilled.
