Vandal

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

Vandalism is the hilarious act of pwning someone else's property, especially their internet pages. It is only acceptable on ED if done for the lulz, But vandalizing Wikipedia is encouraged no matter what.

Contents 1 History 2 Encyclopedia Dramatica vandalism 2.1 Anatomy of an ED vandal 2.2 What to do if you encounter a vandal on ED 3 How to become a wiki vandal 3.1 How to mess with insane site administrators (variations on Grawp technique) 3.2 How to find pages nobody watches 3.3 Direct Admin Attack 3.4 Hide vandalism 3.5 How to make Wikipedia vandalize itself 3.6 Blatant vandalism 3.7 Moar blatant vandalism: Raid 3.8 Sneaky vandalism 3.9 MOAR sneaky vandalism 3.10 Shotgun Blast 3.11 Imitate WordBomb 3.12 The subtle method 3.13 Username rotator 3.14 Reverse DOS 3.15 Pagemove 3.16 m Articlename (+0) . . Vandalname . . (capitalization fix) 3.17 How to use several vandalism accounts and avoid autoblocks 3.18 Template vandalism 3.19 Huge text vandalism 4 See also 5 External links

[edit] History

There are several theories on how the universe started and the human race came into being. One theory is a big bearded superadmin got bored on their week off; he (she or it) started fucking about with light and shit and by day six they had invented just about everything. Another theory is that first there was nothing, and then that nothing exploded into something and over billions of years that something evolved into the fucked up universe we know today. Religion and Science, nobody knows for sure who is right, everybody is really just guessing. Even those who know how to use Google.

What is known for sure is that whatever brought the human race kicking and screaming into existence, whether it be Creation or Evolution, someone royally fucked up; resulting in thousands and possibly millions of fucktards being born.

[edit] Encyclopedia Dramatica vandalism

By the Twenty First Century, many of these fucktards learned how to use the internets. Confronted by so many pages of information and creative outlets, many of these poor cretins were mentally unhinged and sent into fits. With foam emitting from their herpes infested mouths, many tapped into their most primeval instincts and those instincts told them to smash and destroy anything that scared their feeble minds. And OMG! LOL! Wikis let you create an account and change their content! Even Cretins can be uber leet webpage h4xorz! Thus the Encyclopedia Dramatica vandal was born.

[edit] Anatomy of an ED vandal

Encyclopedia Dramatica vandals DO NOT understand the following concepts:

• Encyclopedia Dramatica has been created to spread lulz.
• The majority of Encyclopedia Dramatica articles are lies. It's sad but true.
• Encyclopedia Dramatica's patrons like ED because it spreads lulz and lies.
• It's easier to vandalize after you take the cock out of your mouth first.
• Trying to destroy or deface a popular Wiki is like pissing in the wind.
• Nobody cares what they think.
• Trousers go on BEFORE the underwear.

Theoretically a very patient social worker could explain the above points, but without a good tumble in the sack an ED Vandal is never going to be cured of their chronic retardation. Unfortunately all ED vandals are obscenely ugly and naked encounters with other members of the human race are forbidden; partly to stop these asspies from reproducing but mainly because rape is illegal.

[edit] What to do if you encounter a vandal on ED

As yet no organizations have been set-up to counsel those who have come into contact with a vandal, because nobody affected by a vandal particularly needs any counseling. Vandals have not realized that their defacing of the lulz is not only inconsequential but provides more lulz at their expense. Bear in mind the following steps to survive an encounter with a vandal.

• DO NOT make eye contact. They won't savage you like a baboon, but as mentioned earlier, they are ugly.
• QUIETLY and CALMLY revert everything they have done.
• WAIT PATIENTLY for an admin to ban them and their sockpuppet accounts.
• Point at them and laugh. It's allowed; they are worthless scum.

[edit] How to become a wiki vandal

In recent weeks, Wikipedia and other wikis have descended into a glorious orgy of vandalism, with vandals spontaneously ganging up on pages. However this has lead to a decline in IRL vandalism as kids don't get out enough nowadays and just fuck around on computers instead. To get into the world of wiki vandalism, follow the following protips. This time next week you could be the new Willy on Wheels!

[edit] How to mess with insane site administrators (variations on Grawp technique)

If you want to troll insane admins, you should post something random that normal is not harmful like "diesel is the best drink" or "diesel - one gallon a day keeps the doctor away". Then go to a wiki and just repeat it over and over. People did that at the German Wikipedia and now saying anything about diesel results in a permaban.

Even better, find a wiki with really crazy administrators. For instance, http://www.memory-alpha.org , will falsely call any talk page comments by an IP address or new user as vandalism no matter what. See [1]deleted and [2]. Just go somewhere on their site and mention that X star trek technology resembles iphones until iphones becomes a word for permaban. For best measure, see the contributions by this user [3] and copy and paste what they wrote around to different articles. Use Alt+173 in the middle of text that is blocked by any new wordfilters they put up to bypass them. They will usually freak and protect Special:Allpages for hours so nobody can edit but sysops and when you make them do that, you win! The admin "Shran" is most likely to freak at the first but of vandalism and he is unemployed and is on the site 16 hours a day, but when he's not there the admins are lazy so calling in help from friends so they see lots of different IP ranges will make them go ape. It is best to vandalize templates [4] because their site has caching problems and so the vandalism will often get stuck in pages after it has been reverted.

The thing is, the already crazy admins go even crazier as this happens day after day and they see they can do nothing to stop it. For example, Grawp made Wikipedia fall to its knees.

[edit] How to find pages nobody watches

Wikipedia has a place Special:Ancientpages of pages nobody has ever edited in years. This likely means no one is watching them, either. When you edit them, make sure your account is over 5 days old since Wikipedia has special ways of stalking people with new accounts. Also make sure your user and talk pages aren't red links because people with red links there look like newbs and vandals.

[edit] Direct Admin Attack

For some epic lulz on Wikipedia, follow these steps: 1. Copy and paste the picture of the man tits with the caption "Persian Poet Gal's Rack Persian Poet Gal[5] is, of course, the closet lesbian Wikipedia admin that spends all of her day reverting vandalism while raping herself with multiple cucumbers, which pickle on contact with her toxic vaj. 2. Go to Wikipedia and paste iit on as many articles as possible. 3. you will get blocked, but if you do it enough, you get a ridiculously lulzy angry letter from the cucumberphile lezbo herself. enjoy!

[edit] Hide vandalism

The best way to encourage vandalism to go around vandal hunting and when you spot vandalism, do a tiny, minor edit over the vandalism. This keeps it from being the top edit so it's harder for people to spot or remove. You also pretty much get away with this without being banned. Not only that, but the vandals get banned slower and often the vandalism never gets cleaned up.

[edit] How to make Wikipedia vandalize itself

Make an account and while it's new...

1. For your first bunch of edits (20 or so) revert vandalism, but instead of "Reverted blah blah identified as vandalism" make the edit summary vague so it might be vandalism, or it might not--if you're unsure what to do, just use a single cuss word as the edit summary. Don't revert vandalism that's too obvious like blanking or replacing the whole article.
2. For your second bunch of edits (20 or so), use the same type of edit summaries as the first bunch, but this time do vandalism. It's best to do sneaky vandalism, but if that's too hard then pasting Mediawiki Goatse never grows old. Another good one is the ASCII of the disfigured penis from ED's John Wayne Bobbitt article.
3. ????
4. PROFIT!

Pros:

• + Vandal fighters will revert your first batch of edits, thus reverting vandalism back in. Then when people will see that the last edit was an admin reverting vandalism, they will leave it alone.
• + Your earlier vandal fighting will confuse people and so your vandalism in your second batch of edits will stay.
• + Although probable, you are less likely to be banned.

Cons:

• - Requires a lot of time, scheming, and overall effort.

Proof it works: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Contributions/Tubetendsd That account did a bit of vandalism and then reverted vandalism with blank edit summaries and then administrator Metros undid the vandalism reverts [6] [7]

[edit] Blatant vandalism

Most people don't know how to properly vandalize Wikipedia. They just go and randomly mention someone is gay and think they won. But they get reverted and the past revisions of the article get compressed together so they won't even have made any impact on the database and their vandalism is forgotten. Here's how to do a proper vandalism:

1. Make a new account so they can't wikistalk your past vandalism.
2. Copy the text here: http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Sandbox&action=edit&oldid=141543921 (or make your own shock image in table form)
3. Paste it somewhere random people will see
4. Change IP and repeat.

Pros:

• + Requires very little effort.
• + Encompasses a large portion of Wikipedia, i.e. more people will witness it.

Cons:

• - Requires a dynamic IP address.
• - Your edits will quickly be reverted.

NOTE: This won't work on ED because the size of the MediaWiki goatse is over the 200kb limit for ED. http://www.phpriot.com/5434

[edit] Moar blatant vandalism: Raid

1. Organize a raid with lots of /b/tards.
2. Have everyone erase a shitload of articles and replace them with the goatse wiki table or the ASCII of the disfigured penis from ED's John Wayne Bobbitt article.
3. If done correctly, it will take the admins hours or even days to sort everything out.

Pros:

• + You get to learn a invaluable lesson in teamwork. Awe! <3
• + Highly effective if done properly.
• + More IPs and/or usernames to track, making it more difficult to assess the damages.

Cons:

• - Organize? .../b/tards? Is it possible?

[edit] Sneaky vandalism

1. Hit "random article" until you find a small article nobody watches.
2. Change something (e.g. a number) and make it look like you're correcting an inaccuracy. Claim in the edit summary that the website/source/references/etc says it's this and the article was wrong and do it in a pompous way of a regular wikipedo so they'll believe you.
3. Continue again using a different IP if editing on IP or username if logged in so they can't revert your work all at once.

NOTE: This won't work on ED. Articles are not put on ED because they are fact, articles are fact because they are on ED.

Also:

1. Make sure you're editing Wikipedia as an IP, not as a logged in user. Have an account ready to log into. Choose an obscure article, and vandalize it with something that is potentially libelous to the biography of a living person, and add a reference (which should really be a goatse link). Then quickly do another edit like adding "Yeah", save it, then log in to an account and revert the second edit, with an edit summary of "Reverting vandalism". The first edit with the really critical vandalism will remain intact, as admins will assume good faith on your part. Then Google, and Answers.com and a million other web domains will scrape the content and it'll stay on the page for months on end. Daniel Brandt suggested this, and it works! Massive lulz can be achieved from seeing this vandalism stay on these pages for this long.

Pros:

• + Will take longer before your edits are reverted.
• + Websites that scraped Wikipedia articles will expand your longer-lasting vandalism across the internets.

Cons:

• - Requires a lot of time, patience, and persistence.

[edit] MOAR sneaky vandalism

1. Find a page that isn't regularly edited using random article.
2. Find a good part of text that doesn't have links
3. edit the file, replacing text with ascii code (&#65) following each letter with a semicolon (;) (A)
4. Bonus lolz if you get a friend (or more) to add substantive edits in ASCII code.

Pros:

• + Will make later edits impossibly difficult
• + is invisible on a page until someone tries to edit

Cons:

• - requires more than 1 person to be really effective.

[edit] Shotgun Blast

1. Create a user account, or simply use your existing IP address.
2. Bombard random articles (preferably less-known articles) with both vandalism and beneficial edits.
3. Keep going and do not falter. The more articles you affect, the better.

Pros:

• + Your vandalism will be seen by many, in a short period of time, across the website.
• + It will waste an administrator's or patroller's time in reverting all of your edits.
• + Some confusion will ensue if at least half of your edits were not vandalism.

Cons:

• - You will get banned. (But collateral damage from a ban is always a positive)
• - Your vandalism will have a short lifespan.

[edit] Imitate WordBomb

Go to http://www.antisocialmedia.net and read his stuff. Then start spewing it onto Wikipedia. But, don't act like a fan. Rather, act like you're really him:

1. Mention that Gary Weiss edits his own Wikipedia article with secret sockpuppets like Mantanmoreland.
2. Out the IPs of wikipedia admins and do about any and all outing.
3. Edit articles about Overstock.com, Gary Weiss, Naked Short Selling, Patrick Byrne, etc. how WordBomb would do. Wikipedia has an unwritten rule that these four articles and some others are not allowed to be edited by anyone but Gary_Weiss's socks and The Hasbara Fellowships due to bribes to Jimbo.

The Wikipedia Jews really hate WordBomb. Really. Acting like a WordBomb sock produces no end of lulz. You achieve victory when you get your ISP banned from Wikipedia so then complaints will pour in from innocents affected.

Pros:

• + It really drives the admins insane! They are so nuts about keeping anyone like WordBomb off the site that they will ban entire ISPs! Yes, you can get everyone in your city to flood Wikipedia with complaints! They really do routinely ban whole IP ranges for life associated with WordBomb and have even banned Overstock.com's entire IP range even though WordBomb no longer works there (they banned that range a year after WordBomb stopped working there, ironically).
• + If you have a way to dial long distance free or cheaply then you can get an entire country banned!

Cons:

• - This is more trolling than vandalism

Note: Don't diss Mormons when doing this. WordBomb lives in Utah supposedly and is likely a lucky Mormon having buttsecks with 10 hot wives as well as one nubile young adolescent boy in drag.

[edit] The subtle method

Subtlety is an awesome way to create ongoing pseudo-vandalism and wild inaccuracies throughout Wikipedia. The method is easy, and if you do it well it's quite fun too.

Hit random article and look for articles that won't be getting a large amount of focus. Any articles with editing disputes should be kept clear of, so people don't look at your past edits if you write something that pisses them off. Then, find somewhere in the article where you can add a weasel phrase, a small inaccuracy, a lie, or a softly-softly pisstake. These edits are long term remember - the result is not in the editors getting pissed off but in the users of Wikipedia reading shitty articles. For example "as a matter of fact," "contrary to popular belief," "as an interesting aside," "actually..." and many other phrases are all good to enter wherever the hell you can fit them to make the sentence seem on any second glance completely ridiculous. Fake statistics can be entered where no-one will be checking, fake plot turns can be added into articles on lesser known books etc etc. Be creative, but be subtle.

One thing is to beware if anyone reverts more than once, replies to you on a talk page, and hasn't been to that article before. Beware especially if they do it more than once, especially if it's over a long period of time. Many wikipedians are batshit insane stalkers, for instance User:Oli Filth claims to stalk many many people on Wikipedia over the long term once he thinks their edits are bad.

[edit] Username rotator

Even if you're on a static IP that doesn't change, one easy way to avoid being banned is to create a new user account for every piece of vandalism you carry out. You're unlikely to get caught unless you vandalize the same page or add the same type of content. What you should really be seaking is glorification in creating inappropriate pages and trying to get as many of them protected against creation as possible, but you have to be stealthy about it.

[edit] Reverse DOS

MediaWiki uses something called an "autoblocker," every ip address used by a banned account is also blocked at the moment the banhammer hits. The autoblocker timer lasts 24 hours and resets everytime you try to edit from the pwned account. Meant to halt persistent vandals, this in fact can play directly into your hands. If you are lucky to be on an ISP that routes everyone through a single shared ip address, such as in a university or a small country, potentially thousands of people could be blocked from editing within a heartbeat. If you are ever on vacation in Qatar make sure to vandalize from the hotel, there a million people share the ip 82.148.97.69, and this can happen again.

From the Qatar blocklog:

1. 05:56, 28 November 2007 Jmlk17 (Talk | contribs) blocked "82.148.97.69 (Talk)" (anon. only, account creation blocked) with an expiry time of 10 days ‎ (Vandalism)
2. 03:28, 30 November 2007 John Reaves (Talk | contribs) unblocked 82.148.97.69 (Talk) ‎ (This is Qatar.)

[edit] Pagemove

Moving pages is a great way to vandalize Wikipedia. The only thing is you need to create an account four days before your spree (and then make ten inconspicuous edits). After that, you just follow these simple steps.

1. Go to a page like Bear and click on move on top.
2. Choose a funny title. Either put in an admin's personal info from wikipedia-watch.org or put something the Wikipedia administration would be embarrassed to see.
3. Then, go back to the bear page, and replace that page with Lulz.
4. Repeat

In the end, it'll end up with administrators with activity logs full of things like:

• AdminX moved 'AdminX's real name is John Smith and he bribed Jimbo for adminship' to 'horses'
• AdminX deleted 'AdminX's real name is John Smith and he bribed Jimbo for adminship'

Willy on Wheels and Grawp have become famous names in the pagemove vandalism world.

Another method that causes many lulz is combining pagemove vandalism with advanced forms of ræp. See for example this: [8].

[edit] m Articlename (+0) . . Vandalname . . (capitalization fix)

1. Make an account and put something on the user and talk page.
2. Then wait 5 days so you're off the newbie recent changes list and then download Notepad++. Don't try this with an IP address as people watch IP edits closely.
3. Then find an article nobody watches and that doesn't have any fancy text code like Arabic writing or anything that isn't ASCII.
4. Cut all the text and paste it into Notepad++. If it has foreign language links at the bottom of the page in another alphabet, work around these.
5. Then select all the text in Notepad++, right click, and then in the menu that comes up you can make all text upper or lowercase--choose one or the other.
6. Cut all text in Notepad++ and paste it back into the article.
7. Write something into the text box like "typo fix", "spelling fix", or for true irony "capitalization fix" which will result in 0 bytes changed and it will appear in recent changes that you merely capitalized a single letter.

Only do this once per account so they can't ruin your other work if they catch you.

[edit] How to use several vandalism accounts and avoid autoblocks

To avoid autoblocks when one vandalism account is blocked. Before you start create six or seven accounts and leave them, then vandalize as an anon until you are blocked, but still you can edit with accounts, meaning as your Ip is blocked an autoblock cannot hit it when an account is blocked. Hence you can vandalize with those six accounts very quickly at the same time without suffering an autoblock, allowing extremely quick vandalism and sockpuppet sprees.

pros: allows quick and easy vandalism without autblocks

cons: since your IP will be blocked, you will need it to be dynamic to start again.

[edit] Template vandalism

To vandalize a particular article, with say the mediawikiGoatse, provides a more concealable way of vandalizing. The best article to choose is Wikipedia's Today's Featured Article. Click edit at the top of the page and then scroll down past the edit box and there will be a list of all the templates used in that article. About 90% of them will be protected or semi-protected. Pick one, which isn't protected; delete its content; insert Goatse table; write "fixed typo" in the edit summary; hit Save Page. This will usually go unseen for two to twenty minutes, before they figure out what's going on. Only vandalize one template per account/IP address, because the more edits you make, the greater your chance is of getting caught via the recent changes page. The FA of the day is seen by hundreds of thousands of Wikipedos and members of the public each day, so this is a great choice for mass vandalism! For even more epic lulz try copy and pasting the mediawiki Goatse several times, which will cause the computer to lag or if they're using Firefox...crash. The limit on Wikipedia is 2 MB per article, but if templates are too big they won't show up on the article they're included in. For extra sneakiness put the goatse in include only tag, so the template will look untouched, therefore wikipedos will get confused.

Here is an example of someone doing it to a template, which featured in Wikipedia's FA of the day, To Kill a Mockingbird, on 11 July 2008.

pros:

• Gets seen by thousands of people
• Quick and easy (only one edit required)

cons:

• You will get blocked without question, but don't forget to post it on your talk page afterwords!
• The Goatse doesn't look quite right when it appears on the article in question, because its merges with text

[edit] Huge text vandalism

Huge text vandalism is simple. place about 15 big tags on a word near the top of a page. For a super effective attack, edit a box containing text(usually listing info). The result is the layout fucks up a lot and usually you can't even click "edit page". also, everything else completely fucks up and most of the text is unreadable.

PROS:

• Fucks up format
• More likely to stay at least an hour
• Can't click "edit this page"

CONS:

• Very noticeable

[edit] See also

• vandalize.us
• Countervandalism.org
• Professor Tim Pierce
• Vandalize Every Equation
• Willy on Wheels
• WikiFUD
• Wikipedia
• Wikitheft
• VANDALCORP
• And last but not least, Grawp

[edit] External links

• The secret of all vandals: Lots of good links here
• Vandalism stories on the Homestar Runner wiki
• Wikitruth's page on vandalism
• The Wikipedia defcon vandalism scale. God help us if it ever reaches one!
• Vandalcorp